Messes

When Angela lived here, one of our biggest arguments (continual arguments, I mean) was over our Mary/Martha complex. She was Mary. I was Martha.

I tried my best to instill in her the value of a chore well done. Have weekend plans? You don't get to start them until the dusting is finished, the yard is mowed, the groceries are purchased, the bed is made, and the laundry is folded. It's the responsibility of a grown-up, I reasoned. We don't have the luxury, any longer, of flitting about having fun with others when responsibilities remain undone at home.

She disagreed. People before chores, she said. Have the chance to spend time with a friend? Invest in the relationship instead. The dusting and mowing and shopping and laundry will all still be there when you get back.

But what if it rains and you can't mow? What if someone stops by and the house is a mess?

Over the three year period we lived together, guess who started to win the ongoing battle of the M&M complex?

Clue: Wasn't me.

She slowly taught me that people and relationships ARE important and in fact...gasp...more important than dusting. (Because let's face it. Whenever you dust, it will need done again in five minutes.)

I thought of her as I looked around the house tonight:

* A half-finished Pinterest project is haphazardly thrown on the dining room table.

* Tonight's dishes are still on the counter because I haven't gotten around to emptying the dishwasher I ran today.

* I need to mow but it may not happen for just a few more days yet.

* The laundry bag is full...but there's always tomorrow.

And yet, this week I've gotten to spend time with friends. And how I wish I could tell her she's right. That those conversations I've had, the hugs I've swapped, and the investments I made far outweigh a spotless countertop.

Angela, I miss being able to tell you you're right. I hope God lets you know, in some way, the impact you made on my life. And I know now that those moments you spent investing in people were absolutely the right choice. You didn't have a whole life ahead of you. You made the most of the time. You left the mess to love on hurting hearts.

Good choice. I hope I can be like you when I grow up.