Just A Note of Thanks

I left a shortened version of this on Facebook this week, so if that display of schmoopiness left you eye-rolling, then just feel free to skip this post! :)

I'm not sure if it's this season of Thanksgiving or the heart-preparations for our upcoming 5th anniversary, but this week I'm so grateful for Ryan, I could just cry. (Alas, I cry over most everything, so I haven't worked up the energy for thankful tears just yet.)

We learned earlier this year, when Mom had her hip replacement, that it's handy to have a medical person in the family. Ryan translated all the doctor-ese for us, helped us secure things like walkers, which apparently require a level of federal security clearance to obtain, and of course, helped with her actual therapy.

This round (this double-knee-replaceent-round) it's gone from being "handy" to have a medical person in the family to being just flat-out comforting.

He's answered a zillion questions (from her, from Dad, from me, from my sisters, from bystanders in the hallway - okay maybe that last part is an exaggeration). He's offered advice to try to make recovery go smoothly. He's gently corrected her when he sees something isn't quite right. Those are all handy sorts of things.

But I've watched (from the far corner where I'm confident I can't break anyone) as he has actually rolled up his sleeves and crawled in to help. He's shifted her in bed when she needed to turn. He's walked with her when she needed to move. He's helped her get up and down, back and forth from restroom breaks, and in and out of cars.

And more than that, he has been voluntarily going to work early every single day to spend some time with her before his shift begins. He talks with her, prays with her, and tries to make sure her day begins well. (And I didn't ask him to do any of that. It was all his idea.)

I've been doing my best to be a good daughter in the ways I can. (Laundry, company, taking mental notes from conversations with social workers, therapists, and doctors...that sort of thing.) But when it comes to the hands-on part, I'm not what she needs. He is. And he's absolutely willing and able to step in and help. It lifts a HUGE burden from all of us and makes me love him even more. Not because he's doing work in my place, but because he's genuinely showing love and care. He's not on the clock. He's just being a good son.

I've watched Ryan step into this very role in his own family, with his mom, with his grandpa last year after his brain surgery, and with others, too. But to see him voluntarily assume that role with my family is such a blessing.

Yes, here on the brink of five years and Thanksgiving Day, I have much to be thankful for, and Ryan Shaffer tops my list.

(One of our more awkward selfie attempts, but you get the idea.)