Sunday, September 17, 2006

Last weekend I went on a retreat. It seems like so much longer ago than just last weekend, as you may have read in my most recent posts about love.

The weekend was amazing – the perfect pick-me-up in between a couple of stressful weeks. But beyond the time of rest that it was – it was a time of learning. So I thought I would share with you some of what I learned. There’s too much to pack it all into this week, but maybe I’ll write about it again next week.

One of the big lessons that God taught me that weekend was about faith. I had no idea that promptly upon my return from the retreat, He was going to send me on a bold faith experiment that I can’t even fully explain to you because I don’t fully understand what it entails. But there were a couple of moments that weekend that were about faith and knowing what it means to be provided for by a loving God.

Marie and I went up to the retreat early so that we could spend some time by the water before everyone arrived. We got to the grounds about 2 in the afternoon, dumped off our stuff and headed straight for the water. We were out there a while, journaling…soaking up the sun…splashing our feet in the water…and trying to figure out the mysterious couple hanging out nearby.

Because of my unusually large breakfast that morning, I’d skipped lunch, so by about 3:30, I was ready for some food. I hadn’t brought any snacks, and dinner wasn’t for a couple of hours. I whined around on the pier, so finally, Marie and I decided to see if the gift shop carried food. We pooled our pitiful collection of pocket change for a bag of microwave popcorn and headed to the vending machine room to pop it.

The bag overheated and caught on fire. While we waved at the air and watched the sad stream of smoke rise from the smoldering bag, my tummy rumblings grew louder. I was just so hungry! We headed back to our room and while we fished around for more money, I caught a glimpse of an unfamiliar black bag resting at the foot of each of our beds. “Marie, look! Someone was here!” I grabbed the bag, which bore the women’s ministry logo from the church – and I tore through it. Inside there were bags of candy!!!

I didn’t even think twice. I looked up and said, “It’s Jesus candy!! He heard me say I was hungry!!” We dug around more to find what other treasures were hidden inside and found a keychain in each bag. Mine was purple, and hers was pink. If you know the two of us, you know that I’m the purple girl and she’s the pinkster! It couldn’t have been more perfect. And aside from the way the candy corn and Hershey kisses calmed the hunger pangs, I knew that God was looking out for me. He cared enough to send food – chocolate, no less – to a hungry girl who lost her popcorn to a microwave mishap.

The next morning, during the prayer-walk time, I sat on the edge of the lake and listened as God shared with me so many things I needed to know. Some of them are things that I may not even know yet why I need to know, but they’re in the reserve of my mind for whenever the moment arrives.

While I sat by the lake, the water began to lap from a swell somewhere out in the deeper waters. Then the wind caught hold of it and it began to splash in earnest up near the shore. I thought about the old illustration I’d heard when I was a kid about how the wind is an example of God at work. You can’t see the wind, but you can see what it does, so you believe it exists. And so it is with God…

So as I thought about that, I noticed a lone duck floating by the spot where I’d parked to learn. I wrote in my journal, The duck swimming by just floats atop the water – even when a bigger wave swells, it sits calmly, able to take whatever it is that comes its way. I know, I know. Under the water where you can’t see, it’s kicking ferociously. But all I could see was the calm duck riding atop the wave. When the water kicked up, it rode with it. When the water dipped, it didn’t freak out. It just continued to ride the wave.

I’m a freaker outer. I have lessons to learn from a duck. I need to learn to sit and ride the waves and dips.

But that wasn’t the end of the lesson for me. I realized, after the duck was safely under the pier on his way to wherever he was going…that I forgot to take a picture of him!! I have to do a scrapbook page of my weekend and all I learned. I’d just learned something huge from a duck and I forgot to photograph him!

I know it sounds crazy, but I started praying for another duck to swim by. I waited and waited and began to think the duck I’d seen was some angel-duck who had vanished into thin air leaving behind no family or friends. And then several minutes later, after I moved out to the pier, a duck swam by. I grabbed the camera and started taking pictures.

My faith was too small. I had given up hope that any other ducks swam the waters of Lake Wawasee that day. But just as God sent candy to my hungry tummy, He sent a duck for my scrapbook page. And in those things, I began to learn that if God can do that, no task is too small, too big, or too ridiculous.