Passion

A friend of mine e-mailed me not long ago...just a general chit-chat kind of e-mail. I'd written him a small novel of sorts when he faced a rough patch, and when he thanked me for my words, he referred to me as a "passionate lady." My immediate reaction was Oh, I said too much! I rattled on and probably tired him so...

...and maybe I did. But I think he meant the words as a compliment, and I know I chose to take them as such. I determined a while back that I wanted to be known as a person of passion. I love people, and when I invest in them, I want to invest wholeheartedly...passionately. Sometimes I invest with words, sometimes with cards, sometimes with cooking, sometimes with time itself. But regardless of the method, I try to be passionate in my approach.

Yesterday I shared my determination to be more disciplined in my writing. Since I love fresh beginnings, I chose to use my birthday as day one of this discipline. During the Grey's Anatomy finale, I sat on the couch with my pen, my highlighter, my laptop, and my chicken-scratched notes and began to put thoughts to screen.

My topic this time goes back to a writing seed planted months ago, and it pushes me to immerse myself in thoughts I'd rather push away. Thoughts of hearing about being a surprise baby. Thoughts of letting that news consume my life. Thoughts of realizing such consumed living wasn't really living at all. Thoughts of understanding and embracing the life God clearly intended me to have.

Thoughts of a life that began here:

Maybe it was because I chose to begin thinking about it on my birthday that I found myself unexpectedly emotional. Maybe it was because I combined this project with a tear-jerker of a season finale. But maybe...just maybe...it's because I was immersed in my passion.

So Today is Your Birthday...

When I lived at home, Mom used to wake me up with her alternative birthday song: So today is your birthday, that is what I've been told. What a wonderful birthday, you are one more year old. On your cake, there'll be candles, all lighted for you. And the whole world is singing, Happy Birthday to You.

This has since been replaced with Happy birthday....happy birthday...sickness, sorrow and despair...people dying everywhere...happy birthday...happy birthday.

There's a third one she sings, too, and I heard it more than once today, but apparently for now, I've blocked it out, so you're spared.

I said out loud at least two dozen times today..."It's probably because I'm 31." That sounds SO STRANGE. I wondered what this birthday would do to me. It has been a great day, for sure, but now it's 8:20 and I'm sitting here wondering what comes next. Should I go get coffee or something? It doesn't feel like the party should be over, but I think it is. It's probably because I'm 31.

But here's what this 31 year old did today:

My friends, Tom and Olivia, started my birthday off with a pretty great gift! They came over to my house, cooked breakfast, and served me in the fat chair. :) Please excuse the look in the picture. I literally rolled out of bed when they arrived and just plopped down under the princess blanket to wait for the food to be served. It was so weird to just sit and have someone else do the cooking in my own kitchen! They made amazing pancakes, sausage, and scrambled eggs.

Here I am with my breakfast makers. :) I really appreciate their friendship so much. I love hanging out with them and love it that THEY like to hang out with ME.

After starting over on the hair...I went to Mom and Dad's house, where I received some lovely gifts. I was very excited about them.

After THAT, we went on in to Kokomo to eat at Culvers, per my request. I wanted a butter burger, a mixer, and a sweet tea, and that's exactly what I got!

My choice for a birthday outing was to go to the Designer Show Home in Kokomo. It's like a whole house of a real live HGTV reveal. This house was huge and I loved looking in all the rooms and getting ideas of things to do in my own house. (Or at least dream about.)

After we toured the home, Mom and I went shopping. I got some really great deals at Hobby Lobby (moment of silence for its departure from my town....) and thought it made a perfect birthday.

So....what next?

This week I was blessed to reconnect with my friend Jody, who along with her husband, was my youth pastor back in the day. She's a writer now, and reading her blog and her passion for the craft has reminded me that I need to create a discipline that pushes me to write more. More than just journaling. More than just blogging.

So now that I'm 31, I think it's time. Time to really push for that dream. To pray more about where God wants me to go with it. To pray about other dreams of my heart that sometimes I am just flat out too lazy to mention to God.

That's what's next.

Goodbye, 30!

Tonight is a very full night, so I'm not sure if I'll have the chance to post later. Just in case I don't...I wanted to squeeze in one last post of the big 3-0 year.

I loved the year of 30. Technically I know it wasn't the 30th year, but you know what I mean. I worried it would depress me to be in such a different place from where I expected to be at this time in my life, but it didn't. There were days, of course. Days when I hated not fitting in with everyone my age who has a well established family. But there were many more days of thoroughly enjoying the opportunity to be...me.

If you know my family at all, it won't shock you to know I grew up on hymns. I reached the lovely teen years where I deemed all hymns uncool and demanded "new" music. I love my new music, but have cycled back to hymn appreciation. And as I think over this past year and all the joy it held, these are the words that come to mind:

Great is Thy Faithfulness, Oh God my Father
There is no shadow of turning with Thee
All I have needed Thy Hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me

I try to be very aware of God's faithfulness to my life...sending me friends and family who keep this journey of mine well-loved. People who listen and offer advice...and know when to just hug me and hand over a Puffs Plus. People who laugh at crazy Bekah-land...and push me to keep going when I'm fumbling in my faith. People who understand the sheer joy of flirtation in frozen foods...and the sheer MAMA!-ness of, well, other situations that probably don't need elaboration on here.

My version of "all I have needed" sometimes (okay, often) differs from God's version, but His is far more accurate and never goes unattended.

Thanks for being part of my 30 year, my blogging buddies! You are great!

Stop the Finale Madness!!

I did not watch American Idol live tonight because I'm also a Biggest Loser fan and its THREE HOUR finale was tonight. I thought it a wiser use of my time to watch it live and catch up on Idol a bit later. So now I catch up....



Danny - I'm not sure I was crazy about the song Paula chose for him, but he gave a great performance with it!!! Obviously I'm a huge Danny fan, so at this point he's not going to do anything to make me mad. I don't think it was his best ever performance, but it was entertaining.



Kris - Has he played the piano before? I remember the guitar but I don't remember the piano. I thought he did a REALLY good job with this song. My favorite part was the smoky sounding end of it. Nice!!! I agree with Randy that he gave a good picture of who he would be as an artist.



Adam - Sigh. I have to admit I liked that one. It still wasn't as good as some of them earlier in the season, but it was better than the last couple of weeks.



Danny - Okay I'm probably a sucker for this song, but I loved it!! I loved the twist he put on it to make it more his style. I loved the way he connected with the song. I rarely agree with Kara, but I'll borrow her "stunning" comment. :) Good luck, Danny!! I hope you make it into the finals!



Kris - Good job, Kris! I think he picked a great song to end on - and I loved seeing that softer side of him again. I'm glad the judges gave him good reviews - I want to see him in those finals!



Adam - Scary Adam was back in that last song. Didn't love it. But of course since he went last again, he'll be fine. Sigh.



It goes without saying that I want a finale of Kris and Danny, but after tonight I think it might be Kris and Adam. :( At least if the judges' comments really do push.....

Bits for Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mother’s Day!

Today I had the chance to treat my Mom (well, hopefully it was a treat!) to lunch at my house. Mom, Dad, and my aunt came over for lunch and just as I was placing the last dish on the buffet, Mom’s phone rang. It was my sister, Julie, and Mom asked her what she was doing. She said, “Standing here at the front door.” Yep! Julie came up to surprise Mom and I loved having them all here for lunch.

We had chicken on the grill and some cheesy potatoes (great new recipe I found that works in the slow cooker…woo hooo!!!), fruit and cheese kabobs, and veggies with dip. For dessert, we had mini cherry tarts and orange cookies with orange frosting. Did you notice…no chocolate? It just seemed that Mother’s Day should require springy, fruit-filled dessert. (pictures in post below)

It’s great to be able to share a day like this one with my Mom – and I’m very thankful for her!

This is my last official “Bits” post as a thirty year old. (Goodness! How did this year go by so fast?) I remember this time last year…looking ahead to the great jump from the twenties to the thirties…half excited about it and half dreading it. It turned out to be a wonderful year, full of blessings and great memory-making moments.

And now, here I am, at the threshold of another birthday, wondering what this year might bring. Kind of excited to see! I’m trying so hard to make the most of my moments…to learn things…to absorb…to be able to turn around and teach others out of what I’ve learned.

I told you a couple of weeks ago that I purchased The Journals of Jim Elliot and that you’d probably see snippets of it now and then. Consider it snippet time. **NOTE ** You might have to read his words a little more slowly to fully absorb them. The flow of language is a little different than we use today.

Lord, I confess to Thee that now that it is well with me I have not remembered Thee aright…how easy it is to get into service after release from chains and to be so active that it is possible to forget the One who ministered when there was no hope of escape.

Jim wrote those words after reading in Genesis 40, where the cupbearer and baker were released from prison…yet forgot to remember Joseph. Once their worlds were right again, they forgot their friend. They forgot their promises. They forgot what it was like to be hopeless.

He went on to say, I would remember Thee, Lord Jesus, because of the seven famine years coming upon the earth – the future of the entire peoples depends upon my not forgetting to make mention of Thy name.

Just think what would have happened if that cupbearer had never remembered Joseph! The day came when Pharoah needed a dream interpretation, and only then did the cupbearer remember Joseph. He thought he was just helping Pharoah…and perhaps helping his old buddy Joseph get out of prison. How could he know that the mere mention of that name would bring about deliverance for the entire nation in the years to come?

And the same is true for us…how can we know when the mere mention of God’s name might bring about a change much larger than we could ever hope to know?

Jim closed that day’s journal with these words: O God, save me from a life of barrenness…and give instead that vital contact of the soul with Thy divine life that fruit may be produced and Life-abundant living may be known again as the final proof for Christ’s message and work!

That is my hope for the year ahead…that I will experience that vital contact of my soul with His heart – and that fruit will be produced!

Happy Mother's Day!!

Happy Mother's Day!!

Today it was my turn to host the official family Mother's Day lunch. It was my turn because I said, "Hey, wanna come over?" LOL. We are so formal in our family.

I hate to toot my own horn on the cooking thing, but lunch was GOOD. My Dad even told me the potatoes were good and that is a Christmas miracle. It was a cheesy hash brown dish that bordered dangerously on a casserole - and he's not fond of casseroles. And I think he ate about 7 of the orange cookies I made, so they must have been good.

Here's the women of the family - at least those present today. Me...Aunt B (Mom's YOUNGER sister), Mom, and my sister, Julie.

Dad playing with the grandcats. They were quite interested in the plant Mom got from Aunt B.

Braeya - nosy little critter, isn't she? Her mom should teach her some manners.

Sorry for the bad lighting situation. Mom said it was her halo shining too brightly. My nice little square table works so nicely - except for when there are five people! LOL.

Julie and Mom

Me with the Mama

You can't see this too well because of the glare, but her gift from me was a framed set of her mom's senior picture, her senior picture, and my senior picture. I had them all done in black and white and it looked pretty cool. There's a very strong resemblance with the three of us, so it was kind of a cool picture.

Oh and look - above - you can see the little cherry tarts!

While Julie was here, she gave me my birthday present. It was Mary Kay perfume and lotion. Exotic Passionfruit. Mmmmmmmmm.

Quiet Days

I've not fallen off the face of the earth, I promise. Just been kinda quiet because my head has been full this week. Not of snot or anything gross like that (although I did pick up this nasty cough from running in the wind...it's precious) - but just of thoughts.

Had kind of a hard encounter this week - and I was thankful for a couple of friends that God sent alongside to encourage me in the down moments. But even so...I was left unable to really absorb much. Just kind of numb in my mind and questioning much about who I am and which friends I can really trust. I genuinely want to believe the best of people and when they let me down, I take it a little extra hard.

Tonight, though, I upgraded to the world of high speed....FINALLY. So I'm enjoying the chance to catch up on things I normally can't watch because dial up didn't allow for it. So back to that I go....

Rock Night

I'm nervous about Idol tonight. I don't like hard core rock music. But then again...not a huge fan of disco, and I lived through that night. And what is this news of duets??? This could be an interesting night.

Adam: Not surprisingly, scared the hooey out of me. MAN he can give some deadly looks! I guess I don't find the death glare all that entertaining or exciting. I will once again stick to my theory of acknowledging his talent without loving his style. Sorry, Sarah and Christina. I think I'd rather they just talk to him. He looks far less scary then.

Allison: I love her hair!! I think I'd like to skip the growing out phase myself and get straight to the long stuff. I thought she sounded really good - but unfortunately this wasn't my favorite night of her. I thought it was funny that Kara asked if she was nervous - because this was the first night EVER that I didn't think she looked 100% comfortable on that stage. I figured rock would be her week hands down, but I really didn't love it. Still - love Allison!!!

Kris and Danny's Duet: Oh man, could life get any better? These are my top two fave guys - and they're singing together! WOW. That is some pretty sweet harmony! I thought their harmony parts were better than the solo parts - but I'm definitely impressed. First song I've liked tonight.

Kris: Oh I really like his sound tonight. And he has more entertainment factor than I've seen from him up to this point. I loved how he engaged the crowd, and at this point, that's something I really look for. It's not just about how they sound in a recording...they have to do concerts too! Maybe I liked him because he wasn't hard core, and I don't like hard core. I'm scared for him since the judges aren't loving him.

Danny: I gotta admit - I did NOT love the scream at the end. But I did admire him for taking hte gargantuan risk of doing it. He certainly can't be accused of playing it safe!! Definitely not his best night, but I still love Danny.

Adam and Allison's Duet: Also some great harmony!I liked it much better than their individual solos. They were great together!!

Okay - Tsofah and I have already deliberated, and I agree with her thoughts. Not sure if they're doing a bottom 3/bottom 2, whatever...but we think Kris will be one of the bottom 2 (thank you, mean judges) and Allison - with Allison going home.

(note - Tsofah just changed her vote...but I'm horrendously multitasking and don't have time to rethink my position right now. lol.)

Why Must Everything Happen on One Day??

May fourth. A very busy day in Bekahland!!

1) HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my sister, Lori! No fair telling ages, but today is her birthday. I called and sang half the song to her. I figured that was enough for the poor girl. Sounded like she was having a very fun day, and that is what matters!!

2) TWO YEARS have passed since the tornado hit Greensburg. Two years ago right about this very time of night...hard to believe. When I talked to Lori earlier tonight, she thanked me for the gift I sent her, which was a thing for her front door. She reminded me that the last time I sent her something for her door, her door blew away that very night. WOOPS. Hadn't remembered that little detail about that year's gift. So here's to hoping for a better night tonight.

3) HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my big, big three year old girl, Braeya Jo!! Tonight was her "party." Here she is NOT sharing her birthday treats with her brother. (It's only fair. He wasn't required to share on his birthday.)


Braeya's new toy - a little ball that lights up. That should keep her entertained for a while.


She's not evil, I promised! I even tried to use the redeye reduction on my computer but apparently it did NOT SAVE. She has such blue eyes and I always have redeye trouble with her. This is first thing this morning when the alarm went off.

More first thing this morning pictures. Happy birthday Miss Braeya Jo!!

4) One year ago today I was in Kansas for Cassie's graduation - with President Bush. Hard to believe that has been a whole year!! Cassie is about to finish up her first year of college and I am not even going to think about how old that makes me (in ten days).

5) FINALLY one of those things that you "hear about" happened to me! Flirting in the frozen foods!! They say grocery stores are great places to meet men. I have never subscribed to that theory because a) I hope to have a better dating plan than random grocery store finds and 2) my demeanor in Wal Mart up to this point in time has not really lent itself to attracting anyone at all. (gulp) But now that it's a pleasant place to be....I enjoy it oh so much more. And I don't know who the cutie was near the hash browns, but I enjoyed the experience! :)
I think that is all for this May fourth!

Bits for Sunday, May 3, 2009

One of the blogs I love to read, Bring the Rain, is written by Angie Smith, whose husband is the lead singer of Selah. I started reading her blog about a year ago when their fourth daughter, Audrey Caroline, died shortly after birth. I love the way Angie writes, I love her sense of humor, her passion for life, and the way she approaches her relationship with God.

Right now Angie is on a trip to India with Compassion International. I've been reading her updates as she has gone through the cities and slums, meeting the children sponsored through Compassion. Earlier this week, she wrote the following:

One of the things I love the most about Compassion is their dedication to serving the poorest of the poor from before they are born until adulthood. Today we visited what is called a "Child Survival Program," and their purpose is to serve babies (starting when the mother is pregnant) up until the age when they are eligible for child sponsorship at age 5 or 6. It was the most amazing thing to meet with the mothers in the program today. Not only are they taught how to take care of themselves while they are pregnant, they are also educated about taking care of their babies, and have "facilitators" that come to their homes several times a month to check in on them. The facilitators weigh the babies and measure them, teach mothers the fundamentals of infant care and nutrition etc. As the babies get a bit older, they teach them how to play and interact with their kids in an age appropriate way, and all of the children's milestones are recorded at the center.

The mothers told us that they really had no idea how to care for their infants, and repeatedly told us how much they had learned from the program.

That last sentence really struck me. My immediate thought was, "Well don't they have What to Expect the First Year to read?" Then I thought, "Do they even know how to read?" The last five or so years have seen me safely out of the professional wedding attendant portion of my life and into the professional baby shower attendant part. I've watched my friends learn to swaddle their babies and rock them to sleep, learn what every cry means, and clap over the accomplishments which range from smiling to sitting alone to leaving diapers far behind. My friends read books and ask doctors and consult with mothers who have walked the road before them, all to learn how to be better mothers themselves.

To think that there are mothers in this world who don't have books - or the knowledge of how to read them - who don't have doctors - and who don't have a MOPS group to run to...is something I can't quite comprehend.

The same day I read Angie's blog entry, I also caught bits and pieces of a documentary playing on the E! channel. I was busy cleaning, but the end of the show captured my attention and I stopped long enough to...be amazed.

The show was about teen pregnancy gone wrong, and the very last story they shared was about a teenager who managed to hide her pregnancy from everyone but one friend. The day of delivery came, and she hid in her house and delivered her baby, whom she then stabbed repeatedly, wrapped in a garbage bag and placed in the trash. She did all of this simply because she wasn't planning to be a mother.

My mother wasn't planning to be a mother again either (when I showed up) - and I became freshly aware that it was only God's grace and blessing over my life that allowed me to be born into a home where I was given a chance at life instead of being robbed of that life at its very start.

It made me think of Angie's blog again - and wonder why I was chosen to be born here, in a country of books and doctors and moms, rather than in a country where women don't even know what to do with a newborn.

We are blessed people, and we take it for granted. 1 Corinthians 4:2 says, "Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful." We've been entrusted with these lives we lead...and it's our time to prove that we are faithful with that trust.

Bekah's Bed and Breakfast

WOW. It only took an hour to figure out the picture setup on this computer. Good thing I'm stubborn!! :)

This weekend, my friend and former neighbor, Julie, came to visit. I miss having her just around the corner!! She and her daughter came to stay at my house while her husband was busy with a youth group event over on campus. This was my first chance to really hang out with Baby Esther, who rewarded me with dozens of smiles, despite not feeling well.

Who needs toys when there are hands to chew on?? I informed her (as I do all babies) that this behavior comes to a screeching halt upon the acquisition of teeth.
She didn't let illness slow her down on the hard work of new skills. Apparently her ability to sit up alone improved dramatically at my house.

She wasn't too terribly thrilled about anyone other than her Mom holding her, but this time went pretty well. She would have looked at the camera, but it was upstaged by Braeya's presence over there on the side.

Verrrrrrrrry sleepy.

Thanks for coming to visit, Miss Esther and Julie!!! I loved having you here!

Thought-Provoking...

...read this in Jim Elliot's Journal last night...based on Genesis 43 when Jacob sends his sons to Egypt to get food during the famine...

With all the storehouses of Egypt so filled that the amount could not be tabulated, Jacob says, "Buy us a little food" (v. 2); "Take a little balm, a little honey" (v. 11). His unbelief parallels mine. When "all things are mine," I hesitate to ask for the greatest, though my Master be Lord of all.

How Do I Pick A Bottom 3 From Only 5?

Oh I think tonight is going to be a good one!! Tonight is comment as I go....lovin' this laptop thing!

Kris - I love this song! Yes, a song I actually know. A Christmas miracle. I love the song and I love the way he sang it. I loved how he kicked it up in the middle there. That was fun. I kind of just melt into his songs and forget to pay attention to anything!! I agree with Randy...his personal best. I'm glad at least three of the four were thrilled with it. Simon!!!! Come on!!!

Allison - I love her hair this week. I know it isn't a hair competition, but I like the color and the longer look. MAN she can sing. Do I say that every week? I continue to be amazed at how comfortable she is on that stage and how well she controls her voice. I hope Kara is right - I hope she picks up a ton of fans. She has no business in the bottom 3. And if Simon's comment lands her there....RRRRRRR.

Matt - Well he was good...but I'm scared for him. There were a couple of parts that sounded kind of rough to me, and I'm worried that it wasn't enough in comparison to the two that have already gone. I do NOT understand how Simon loved it more than the other two. I really don't get it. I thought Kris and Allison were much better.

Danny - I just love Danny. I thought his song was fun and spunky - not to mention his great voice! I loved it that Randy was all ready to get him to sign on to a deal right then. I really really really want Danny to get himself a great little career going. I think he's got the package deal and that is important.

Adam - Oh no. Scary Adam is back. This reminds me of that one week early on that was just frightening up one side and down the other. :( Tsofah and I have already talked and agreed that he even had an evil kind of look at one point. Sorry, Christina and Sarah. I know you guys are huge fans. And I can be easily won over when he wears a suit and does the Elvis hair. But this week he skipped the Elvis hair and brought out his scary eyes....so I wasn't a fan.

Bottom 3? Well I only have a bottom 2, and it's Adam and Matt. I think Matt will be in the bottom 3 for sure. Tsofah thinks the other two will be Kris and Allison. I guess I'll go with her because I can't bring myself to make that decision at this point in time.

Since I Complained So Much...

...I think it only fair to give a warm welcome to our new Meijer, which is FINALLY finished. The parking lot has been packed full each day since it opened...leaving me a nice close spot at the Wal Mart.

I didn't run to the Meijer the day it opened, but last Friday, on my day off, I went in with no agenda...just wanted to see the layout and scope some prices. Of course then I kept running into people I knew, so I mostly ended up being a true product of my father...socializing over shopping. Oh well. I was impressed that while the parking lot was full, the aisles were not...carts were available...and checkouts weren't backed up to Kokomo. Yes, I think this Meijer business is a good thing.

And on the flip side, last night I went to Wal Mart, scooted right into a close parking place, found a cart ready for me inside the store, found virtually no shoppers, so my trip was quick, a checkout lane awaited me, and as I left, the greeter told me to have a good day and be careful. Oh and did I mention the prices had gone down? SWEET!

Bits for Sunday, April 26, 2009

Ahhh, this is the life. It's a day of rest, which means I am not required to think, spell correctly, work out, clean, or mow my lawn. It's the perfect side of warm, which means the familiar whir of the ceiling fan combined with the hum of the newly uncovered air conditioner can be heard from virtually any spot in the house. The cats are who-knows-where, which means I don't have to say things like, "STOP EATING THE LAMP SHADE, BRAEYA!"

The TV Land awards are on, and I'm enough of a olden-days TV nerd to enjoy such a thing. I'm sprawled out in the fat chair with my slightly warm slices of friendship bread, the remote, the phone, and my newest acquisition...my new laptop.

Yep, I branched out. I decided that since I don't always feel the writing inspiration in my office...I should be able to be inspired in any location. So after saving up...off to the store I went to have someone much smarter than I tell me what it is I need to make all my writing dreams come true. And so far, I think he was right. This is definitely the life.

I don't think I have any real pieces of breakthrough knowledge for you this week - but I do have this little bit to pass your way.

Since I had Friday off work, I have had an extra long weekend....and I have enjoyed every last minute of it. From the sleeping in to the window shopping to time spent with friends to vacation planning...loved it all. I even loved sitting out on the porch, soaking up the rays and writing in cards.

I even loved the beautiful weather we had on Friday so I could run outside. PLEASE NOTE that I did not love the running. I just loved the weather. Very important distinction.

Saturday I stood in the performing arts center and watched graduates parade their way over to the gym for graduation...and I remembered a day a few years ago (we won't say how many) when I made that walk myself. And I remember how I longed to enjoy a good life...a post-school life. And I promised myself that if and when the "good life" ever came, I would make sure I really appreciated it. I hoped I wouldn't forget the years of stress and homework.

And I haven't forgotten. And I do really enjoy this life. Admittedly I enjoy it a bit more during the summer when the sun shines and flip flops are in season and the flowers bloom. I enjoy it a bit less in the winter when post-school responsibility requires that I shovel snow. But I do appreciate this life - simple though it is. Simple is good.

So my hope for you this week is that you'll be able to enjoy and appreciate...a good life.

Quick Cinnamon Rolls

You thought I forgot about recipes, didn't you? I didn't - I just haven't made much lately...at least much that I haven't already posted! But we had a birthday in the office this week and that gave me the chance to make something I've not posted!

As previously stated, I'm not really a morning person, so carry-ins of the breakfast hour are always a challenge for me. Mom gave me this recipe, which she got from a substitute teacher at the school where she worked for many years. Now you know you have a good sub when she's willing to pitch in on work carry-ins! :)

This is a great meal to make because it truly can be assembled in less than ten minutes...the night before! All you have to do is remember to bake it in the morning! I've taken this to church and work and it gets rave reviews. Love rave reviews on easy stuff!!

Recipe:
2 loaves frozen bread dough - thawed
1 box butterscotch pudding - NOT INSTANT
2/3 cup butter
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 Teaspoon cinnamon

Slice each loaf of bread into ten slices and arrange in a greased 9x13 baking dish. Sprinkle dry pudding mix over all slices. Melt butter and mix with brown sugar and cinnamon. Spread over each roll. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Bake, uncovered, the next day at 350 for 25 minutes. Serve warm.

I used Rhoades white bread dough because...it's the only bread dough I can find in the Wal Mart. The packages I buy come with 3 loaves, so I use 2 and keep the third for the next time. I have found that if I keep it too long, it doesn't raise (rise?) correctly. This was especially embarrassing the time I made it for work and had one old loaf and one new loaf, so half my pan was high and fluffy and the other half sat like little hockey pucks. Attractive.

I am not sure I would like this recipe in anything but white dough. I don't even know if you can buy frozen wheat dough, but I'm just saying....

Very important to remember to take the bread dough out so it can thaw! I usually cut the dough down the center and then cut each half into five slices. I score it first so if i mess up, I can re-measure before actually cutting.

The dough will come together as it bakes, so it's okay if the slices aren't all smashed up next to each other. They will be eventually.

Make sure you buy the cook and serve kind of pudding, not instant. That's the only reason I had name brand. :) I just sprinkle it liberally over each slice. It's okay if some goes down in between the pieces, but I try to get as much as I can directly on the bread. There's more pudding than you'd think in those little boxes, so you'll have a nice little pile of powder on each one.

Like I said....there's a lot in there!

I cut my butter up into cubes and melt it in the microwave. If you're speeding through it, just melt the butter while you're cutting the bread or sprinkling the pudding.

Add the brown sugar and cinnamon right to the bowl.

You'll find that the mixture is pretty thick - because you have as much sugar in there as you have butter. I've made this with real butter and with margarine and both work well.

I just kind of spoon the mixture over it - again, trying to hit the tops of the bread slices as much as I can, but it will kind of leak down into the pan as well, and that is fine.

This is what it will look like the next morning after it has refrigerated all night. No it's not mold...it's pudding powder that didn't get covered with the butter mixture.

And here is the fully baked version! So yummy! I think it warms over pretty well for leftovers, but it's definitely best straight out of the oven.

I Know Disco??????

This was NOT the week I expected to know songs. What does this say about me? Don't answer that. I can't handle the truth.

So it was Disco night on Idol, and I have reached the conclusion that we're at the point in the competition where I love the ones I love no matter what they do (or don't do) and I don't love the ones I don't love no matter what they do (or don't do). So here comes my totally biased recap.

Lil - I'm Every Woman is a song I knew. My first thought about her was WOW, that is a tight outfit - followed by WOW, I don't think she should be wearing it! I didn't think it was all that great - but I am so not a Lil fan, so I don't think I'd like anything she sang, and I'm very sorry about that. I do think Kara hit it right on the head when she said that Lil HAS been every woman - every week - and has never been herself.

Kris - I knew this song too - and I wasn't a big fan of the slow arrangement, but I LOVE Kris, so it was quite alright with me. According to the judges, the arrangement was great - so what do I know? I was a bit disturbed by Paula's analogy of shopping in the ladies' department.

Danny - I just love Danny. I didn't really love the song itself, but I love Danny and I loved it that everyone but Simon loved him. I didn't like Simon's thought that he didn't have star power. 1) yes he did! 2) it's DISCO night!!! It's not really star power night for most!

Allison - I did NOT love the outfit. I thought she might break her neck in those shoes and once again...way too tight on the clothing. But MAN she can sing and like the judges said - no matter what she does, she rocks. Literally.

Adam - I love Adam when he's normal and not screeching and strange. I truly, truly do. He got a little screamy in the middle of the song, but like Allison, I think he is great no matter what. But can he wear the suit every week?

Matt - I happened to like it. Maybe it was because I knew the song - maybe because it was fun after some different, less disco-y sounds. Dunno. But I did like it. Having said that, I'm a little bit afraid for him.

Anoop - I was with Simon on this one. I did not love the outfit and I thought the song was on the down side of "ehhhh." His face after he finished singing said that he knew the end was rough. I am not sure why the rest of the judges loved it SO MUCH.

My bottom 3 would be Lil, Anoop, and Matt. I think Lil will go home - and I WANT Anoop to be the other one to go home. I truly don't know who has more fans between Anoop and Matt. I think it will come down to that.

What I Threw Away

The radio station I listen to has a great morning team. Any group of people who can speak to me prior to ten and not make me hate them...well...impressive.

This morning their "pondering" of the day was this: what did you get rid of at some point in your life that you wish you would have kept? One caller had gotten rid of Star Wars stuff that now rakes in big bucks as collectibles. Woops.

So I started thinking...what did I get rid of that I wished I would have kept? Kind of a rough question for a packrat who so rarely ditches anything at all.

But I came up with something.

Right after college, when I was still very new in my job, I met a guy whose job interacted (daily) with mine. We were both kind of new in our respective places, and we stumbled along together, trying to figure out how to do what we do. Shop talk gave way to flirting and eventually we went out a time or two.

Though I don't have a great number of dates in my past, he definitely wins the prize for most romantic. He would send me emails just because...a fax now and then just to tease me or to tell me to have a nice day...and he would often email me to see if he could call me after work. I was a giggly mess for weeks.

When things did not work out between us, I was so upset that I shredded every single email (because I'd printed them for posterity), every fax, every note, EVERYTHING. And now I SO wish I'd not done that. Even though it didn't work out - it was still a part of my life and I hate it that I shredded that whole part.

So that's mine. What's yours?

Bits for Sunday, April 19, 2009

My sister emailed this week about a woman who had died and donated her personal library of over 4000 books. Good thing I was already in a chair. A four thousand book library? The only thing that could top that would be a room with a fireplace, a fat chair, and ladders to climb to the tops of the shelves…

While I have a decent book collection, I have a long way to go to reach four thousand. But I’m doing my part to add to the collection whenever I can. Earlier this year I stopped by a bookstore during its going-out-of-business sale. I found a 475 page book that caught my attention. The Journals of Jim Elliot.

Jim Elliot (in case you can’t quite place the name) was one of several missionaries killed by Auca Indians many years ago. His wife, Elisabeth, wrote about him in books such as Through Gates of Splendor and Shadow of the Almighty.

In those books, she shared bits and pieces of Jim’s journal, but later published his writings, she says, “almost in their entirety. The sum of all deletions amounts to perhaps two or three pages.” While I was intrigued to get to peek into his personal life, it felt a bit strange to open a book and read what a man wrote between himself and God over fifty years ago. I felt a little better when the first sentence said, “What is written in these pages I suppose will someday be read by others than myself.” It must have been the permission I needed, because I kept reading.

My grandma used to keep a diary, which mostly served as a written account of each day’s menu, combined with a list of things she did. My journals over the years have contained stories of things that could only happen to me, “hopelessly romantic” accounts of my crushes, whose names I so well-coded that even I can’t remember who some of them really were.

Jim’s journal entries, so far, are not so much about his caloric intake or the state of his romantic life, but much more about what he learned as he carefully studied his Bible. I find myself underlining and writing in the margin and adding snippets of thoughts to my own prayer journal as I try to digest the same lessons he learned half a century ago.

The first journal entry was about his study of Genesis 23 – when Sarah had died, and Abraham needed to bury her. Here is what Jim gathered from that piece of Scripture: Abraham calls himself a “stranger and a sojourner” in a land he believed God was going to give to him. This is the first time he shows any real inclination to making a home on earth, and how slight it is – only a field, some trees, and a cave in which he can bury his dead. Lord, show me that I must be a stranger, unconcerned and unconnected with affairs below…Help me, Lord, not to “mourn and weep” only for those things, once precious, which You teach me are but dead (whether desires, pleasures, or whatever may be precious to my soul right now), but give me a willingness to put them away out of my sight. Burying places are costly, but I would own a Machpelah where corpses (dead things in my life) can be put away.

Just as a side note – Machpelah was the name of the place where Abraham ended up burying Sarah.

Over the past few weeks, God has been working to teach me…or is it that I have been working to learn?...how to put away things that no longer need to have a prominent place in my life. It’s not easy. I love some of those things – much as Abraham loved Sarah. But for me to continue to carry them around and fit them into my life would be as productive as Abraham journeying through life carrying Sarah’s body with him. Some things must be put to rest.

When I went on my retreat last month, I had a Machpelah of sorts…a time and a place where I “buried” something in a very specific place. I do well with moments of the tangible. I think perhaps there are more Machpelahs in my future – when I make the distinct decision to bury something that needs to die from my life.

Since I’m only on page fifteen of the book, I have a feeling I might bring back another nugget to you soon. But in the meantime, think about these words…over fifty years old…and yet brand new.

If Christina Can Do It, So Can I

Take pictures from the car, that is.

Mom emailed this morning to say that a building not far from my work had been hit by a car. The actual building. With an actual car. I don't know anything about what happened or why or anything like that, but I did go by to scope it out - and I'd say it DID get hit!

This picture is hard to see but the massive hole in the building is right behind the black truck. Interestingly enough, the building that was hit is an eye doctor's office, and the building to the left is an insurance office.

I zoomed it up. I would have taken more, but my light turned green and it would have been rude to not go.

Movie Night

I'm going to post my Idol thoughts while I watch the Duggars find out that Anna is pregnant. So if random baby words show up in the post, you'll know why.

Tonight was movie night on Idol and I finally knew a couple of songs! But much like last week - the judges and I were listening to very different performances.

Allison - Love her to death, but I didn't like this song. I didn't know it, so maybe it was the curse of not knowing what it was supposed to sound like. I kept wondering if she was off pitch. The judges raved over her, so she must have done okay, and I was glad they gave her a good review because she does deserve to stay.

Anoop - I knew this song and actually kind of like the song. I think it would have been better if he had taken the advice to "rough it up" a bit. As it was, I thought it was just plain rough. I thought it sounded like a cheesy high school talent show. The judges, however, loved it. How?

Adam - I thought he was really really good. Born to be Wild fit him perfectly and I agreed with Paula that he is one of the bravest contestants they've ever had. I love it that he knows who he is and is not afraid to be that performer. Would I go to one of his concerts? Probably not. But I do think he's good at what HE does.

Matt - I didn't like it as much as last week - but I thought the song got better as it went on. Of course the judges thought the start of the song was the best and it got worse. So what do I know? I like it when he plays the piano - he's good at that. I think the judges want him gone, though.

Danny - I love Danny. I love it that he sang a love song. And I love harps. If I had an instrument to pick that I wish I had learned to play - it would be the harp. That was just a side note. The judges didn't love him tonight - so you'll be able to figure out I DID love it!

Kris - I could have listened to him sing all day. I didn't even care that I didn't know the song. Just sing, Kris! I was worried when Randy didn't like it, but maybe Kara's vote of confidence saved him?

Lil - Oh, Lil. I am not a huge fan of the song The Rose, and I thought all the runs and extra words she threw in distracted from it, so I didn't like it at all. I do like her longer hair - I think it makes her look younger. And once again, my vote was for her to stop talking at the end.

Bottom 3? My bottom 3 would be Matt, Lil and Anoop with Anoop going home.

Happy Easter!!!

If you should care (Lori, you're required to care) - here are our Easter pictures.

I didn't realize until the night before Easter that the reason I had to buy whipping cream for the cheesecake was because I had to MAKE MY OWN whipped cream for the top. Have you people never heard of Cool Whip? But since I'd already invested in the whipping cream - I let Mom teach me how to make it. Here I am with my first ever homemade whipped cream. Paula Deen would have been so proud.

My two desserts. On the left - peanut butter eggs (since Dad doesn't eat mocha cheesecake). On the right - the mocha cheesecake WITH the homemade whipped cream.

Mom's funny. She put together this fruit tray and then put a business card for the fancy fruit trays on it. I thought it was pretty funny.

The Easter dress - and I should have fixed the belt so it was straight! This is the version WITH the cami underneath - not the hoochie mama version it would have been without it!

Here's what happens when no one wants to be in front for the family photo. I thought kneeling was the answer. Um - perhaps not? I really do have legs!!!

So here was the fixed version. Yes, I am the tallest person in my family, thankyouverymuch. Don't tell mom the dirty dishes are in the picture. I promised her they wouldn't be. :D

Bits for Sunday, April 12, 2009

Happy Easter!

Today has been a very full day in Bekahland – and also in Bekah’s tummy! Our family has the wonderful tendency to have far too much food for holidays. I love it so. And since the dress did zip for church today – I was free to enjoy once church had ended. For those of you who were praying for my (extreme) anxiety over reading in church – and more specifically reading that one sentence in Aramaic – I’d like to report it went well. I have no idea what I may have actually said in Aramaic, but I said something.

My day began with a sunrise service. I wanted to mention that since evil DST has moved our sunrise to such a late hour, a sunrise service SHOULD now start at 8 in the morning. But apparently the traditional 6 still stands. So at 5, my alarm began its blaring and my cats began their glaring.

The service was an Easter Pageant service. I think many of you know that for most of my life, I was in the Marion Easter Pageant. A few years ago, they stopped having the Pageant, mostly because the building was in such bad shape. Easter has never quite seemed the same without the weeks of rehearsal leading up to Easter – and then the performances during Easter week. This year a group of people organized a service to show the taping of the Pageant done the year before it ended. I figured watching it at six in the morning was as close to being in it at six in the morning as I was going to get, so I went.

Every time I watch it, I see something new. And what I saw today really struck me – which is especially amazing, considering the pre-dawn hour.

One of the groups in the Pageant was called the Wealthy Family. In many ways, they had the best part of the entire Pageant. They always had the best costumes (trend setters of the tunic world) and entered with great fanfare. Literally. (Men carrying HUGE fans walked before and behind them.) They pranced through with their treasure boxes and huge fruit platter (fake fruit, but I heard once that they hid snacks inside it to eat during the performance) and even a real dog. They paraded from the entrance to a large alcove at the edge of the stage where they got to lounge on padded seats. Once they made their entrance, they were basically done until they left – so they could just sit and watch the entire Pageant from their better than front row seat.

The part I played required me to exit the stage prior to the end of the performance, so I never saw the very end until the taping was released. And it was in those final moments of the Pageant that I saw something new today.

The Pageant ends with the women discovering the empty tomb and running to tell the disciples – and everyone else – that Jesus is alive! For pageantry purposes, all the people who comprised the inhabitants of Jerusalem were to “wake up” from their sleeping positions on the floor (and let me tell you – at six a.m., I wasn’t always pretending with that sleep business) and walk past the empty tomb to promptly exit stage left (or right).

I was always so nervous about making sure I pushed through the masses and past the tomb in the allotted time frame – which was not long – that I never paid much attention to anything else that happened.

This morning I watched as the masses (myself included) pushed forward and squeezed into the tiny backstage areas – and from the middle of the masses, I watched the Wealthy Family emerge. They packed up their treasure chests and fruit tray and dog and walked right back out the way they came in – leaving behind the people pausing to peek inside the empty tomb.

I don’t know if that was purposeful scripting or simply a way to get the lavish props offstage without smooshing them, but this morning it was powerful to me. The Wealthy Family had it all. They had the costumes we all wished for as we fussed and tugged at our hand-me-downs with holes. While we scrambled to get to our next location on cue, they reclined against pillows and ate hidden treats from underneath the piles of fake fruit. As we stood on tiptoe to see over the tall men in front during some of the scenes, they just shifted a bit and watched with ease.

And when the tomb was empty – the tomb that sat just feet from their perch – they packed up their stuff and left the way they came. They gathered their finery about them and walked away from the greatest miracle.

The Day Before Easter...

...began with rehearsal at church for tomorrow's service. As previously mentioned, I am one of the Scripture readers and I regret to report my Aramaic is no better today than it was the day I received the script. Jesus' last words might sound much more like Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious than what He actually said.

Following rehearsal, I had to make yet another trip to Wal-Mart. Today's purpose was two-fold. 1) I had a whole list of things to buy yesterday, but had to turn around and leave because there were no carts and one of the items on the list was cat food. I was not lugging a 20 pound bag of cat food (and other treasures) around the Wal-Mart. 2) After trying on my Easter dress last night just to make sure it did still fit, I discovered it was much more hoochie mama than I remembered. I had to find something to go underneath it so as not to bring great sacrilege to the morning worship service.

Following THAT, I went to my "nephew" Liam's birthday party. Here is the card I made for him. I made this last week during my friend Angi's crafting party. Used her Cricut. Pretty fun!

After the party, I immediately hit WalGreens to develop the party pictures so I can scrap them tonight. When I went back to pick them up, they said my order had been lost. I was unbelievably calm about the inconvenience and ended up getting them for half price (sweet!).

I tried a new recipe - which will probably find its way onto here eventually. I also made my first from scratch cheesecake (for Easter dinner tomorrow) and a new set of Peanut Butter eggs.

I'm now pooped and in need of pink nail polish to match the Easter ensemble, so I'm going to go watch the very last Love Comes Softly movie, scrap the party, and redo my nails!

Good Friday

My sister wrote in an email this morning something about not quite seeing the correlation between Jesus dying on the cross and our chance to sleep in on today's holiday...and truly that was just about the first time I remembered the significance of this day.

I got caught up in the joy of a long weekend and the hunt for a pink purse to go with that crazy dress we all hope still fits come Sunday...and I mentally sailed right on by the entire point of this day.

Jesus didn't get to sleep in on Good Friday. He didn't get to drive through the rain to Starbucks to indulge in coffee and catch up with a friend. He didn't relax in a living room and tickle tiny baby feet. He didn't visit every store in a six mile radius looking for a pink purse. His problems were far greater than no carts in the WalMart and cat food on the shopping list. He didn't take a nap under a fleece blanket and wake up just in time for chicken fried rice and a fortune cookie.

And while all those things made it a good Friday for me (well, except the never ending WalMart hassles) - I slowed down this evening to actually think about Good Friday and what it meant to Someone Who loved me more than I can comprehend.

Tonight on my way to chicken fried rice and fortune cookie land, I drove past the Marion Coliseum, where I many Good Friday nights in the Easter Pageant. Tonight the Coliseum didn't have a line of people outside waiting to get in. It had teenagers in shorts and T-shirts running toward it on their way to play basketball...or lift weights...or swim.

Good Friday and Easter aren't quite the same since the Pageant stopped. I miss it. I miss the sense of humble thanksgiving it brought to my springtime. But as I looked at albums of it online tonight, I found this picture, which reminded me of the moment I always found that lump in my throat.

I always stood very near Jesus (we called him the Christus in the Pageant) at this point in the Pageant. I could feel the floor shake with his steps. I could see the crowd in the distance still shaking their fists...and I could see Peter kneeling in shame. And as I hid my face in my hands and tried to breathe through the hot air of stage lights, I always found myself in awe of the Sacrifice.

The Judges and I Part Ways

I knew it had to come sometime. Apparently tonight was the night. I must need new ears because on all songs but one, we were obviously listening to different performances.

Danny - This is the one and only time the judges and I agreed. I thought he was amazing. I loved how he started out on the slow soft side of things and ended the song on the fast and fun side. I think he is not only a great singer but a fantastic entertainer and I just love him! GO DANNY!!!!!!

Kris - I was annoyed by the gaggle of girls that surrounded him - because I couldn't see him. I thought the song was cool and fun, but the judges didn't really seem to care for it or his rendition or anything else. I did think Randy had a good point (for everyone, not just for Kris) about remembering to not let the song do the owning. The competition is for the singer, not the song. But I thought he did a better job than they gave him credit for.

Lil - I thought this week was her best look so far. Loved the outfit, loved the hair. I thought (for the first time all season) both fit her very well. I loved the song and thought it fit her better than anything she'd sung so far - and then the judges ripped her apart. I thought it was kind of mean of the camera people to zone in SO CLOSE on her face when she was so close to tears.

Anoop - I didn't even remember that he had overreacted to Kara's comment last week but it was nice of him to apologize. I didn't love the beginning of his song this week - I thought he was reaching for notes throughout - and I thought the whole song was forgettable - and then the judges LOVED IT. I can't win.

Scott - Ooh!! No piano!! I was glad to see him away from it - just for a change of pace, but I did not like him with the guitar - and I agreed with Paula about the acoustic thing. I think he should have just plain worked on the singing. I loved the song, I thought he sounded great - and then of course, the judges didn't like it.

Allison - I did not like the song, but I thought she sounded amazing as she always does. I just thought the song didn't suit her - but then the judges loved it. Sigh. I loved watching Allison's mom react to her critique. CUTE. Did anyone else think the judges were trying to buy her some votes by talking her up a lot? I'm not saying she doesn't deserve the votes; she totally does. But since she's been in the bottom 3 so much, do you think they're trying to bump her out of there so they don't have to worry about using the save?

Matt - WOW. That was a Matt we've not seen for a while and I thought he was amazing. Really great. What cracked me up the most was his video at the beginning. When he talked about being in the church musical Angels Aware? I KNOW THAT ONE!!! And in fact, when they showed the clip, I still remembered the lines. Sad, I'm sure, but true. That musical had some great songs in it. It's how I learned the Ten Commandments and I still sing that song to remember which commandment goes with which number.

Adam - Still scares me a bit - but obviously very good. I will admit I was SHOCKED that Simon gave him a standing ovation. That is unheard of - and I wasn't sure it was quite THAT good - but I was still glad for him. I think he is a great performer.

Bottom 3? Probably Scott - Lil and Anoop? Not sure who will get the boot. If that really is the bottom 3, I have no idea who has the biggest fan base to save them.

Stuff and Things

Just doing a little cleanup work here in Bits World. I updated my blog list - and if you used to be on it and aren't now - it's not that I don't like you. It's that you stopped updating! If you rejoin blogger world, let me know and I'll put you right back on the list.

I also changed the name of my list - because I'm truly not buddies with everyone and I didn't want to claim to know more people than I really do. I just listed a bunch of blogs I love to read. And there's a couple more I want to add as soon as I track down the addresses again!

Oh - and in VERY exciting news - "I" participated in a bracket over on Phats' blog and apparently "I" won!!! Unfortunately I cannot take full (okay any) credit. Miss Kristin was my true source of information, so she gets the credit. THANKS KRISTIN!!!!!!!

Okay - I must go run if I'm going to do that and get home in time for Idol. :)

Bits for Sunday, April 12, 2009

In my office, I have a copy of the bestselling (how??) book Who Moved My Cheese. I’ve never actually read the book, but I have seen the movie. (If you know the book at all, you will understand the extreme disturbance of that sentence.) According to the Wikipedia summary, the book is “a motivational book by Spencer Johnson written in the style of a parable. It describes change in one’s work and life, and four typical reactions to said change with two mice, two ‘little people,’ and their hunts for cheese.”

I love cheese. Real life cheese. Not parable cheese. And my reaction to both real life cheese and parable cheese is not “Who moved my cheese?” but rather, “Put down the cheese. Step away from the cheese. DON’T TOUCH THE CHEESE!!!!”

Life in Bekahland has undergone some interesting (and I use that word very loosely) changes in the past couple of weeks. My friend and co-worker Rachel is on maternity leave and I miss her terribly. When I went to see her and meet the baby, I told her I think I got her post-partum depression because every time I think about how her absence changes work, I cry.

Friendships change – and some change so much that they’re never again what they once were, and that is always hard for me. I try to welcome it because I know that the loss or change on this hand might bring about new opportunities on the other hand. But I still don’t like it.

So in the midst of being stretched and pushed and pulled and trying to hunt the stupid missing cheese that has probably just completely left the state…I hold firm to my stance of not asking who moved the cheese. Just step away from the cheese, please.

Today has been a rainy day here in the great state of Indiana. It didn’t start out that way. I awoke to the promise of sunshine (since evil DST has delayed sunrise from its appropriate hour, I currently get up BEFORE the sun – but I could tell it was on its way) and a warmer morning than I expected. I fixed a for real breakfast, drank extra coffee, donned one of the summer collection dresses – and my sunglasses – and headed to church in the warmth and the light.

When I came out of church, it was raining, windy and cold. And it has stayed that way ever since. I have spent much of the day strolling through the house wearing a much-too-large fleece blanket in a cape-like fashion. It is, after all, April, and I refuse to turn on the heat.

As I stood in the kitchen, making my lunch, I noticed the bird bath in the backyard was completely full – almost spilling over into last year’s dead flowers beneath it. I muttered, “When the bird bath is full, it’s time to stop raining.”

Later in the day, that sentence came back to my mind. How many times has my life felt as full as that bird bath? How many times has the flood of grief or pain or moved cheese seemed to overtake my life and I hastily inform God that it’s time to stop because I have reached my saturation point?

Today it didn’t stop raining. And even six or so hours later, the bird bath hasn’t quite overflowed. I guess it can hold more water than I thought.

And maybe my life can handle more missing cheese than I think.

Even so – this is a verse I have come to love in these days of kidnapped co-jack. Normally I’m an NIV-only sort of girl, but this verse from the New Living Translation is stated so beautifully: You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. Psalm 56:8.

God knows where my missing cheese is hiding. He sees my overflowing bird bath. He doesn’t miss a thing.

Joni

Joni Eareckson Tada was on campus this week - being inducted into the Society of World Changers at IWU. I couldn't go to the induction ceremony because it's been a busy week in my office, but I did get a chance to watch the streaming of it as it happened.

I have tremendous respect for her and the life she has lived since she broke her neck as a teenager. I'm sure I wouldn't have nearly the grace and dignity that she has. I heard one of the people who met her while she was on campus say that she is just a lovely person...and she certainly does seem to be.

When I was in 5th grade, we had to do "living" book reports. We had to become a character from the book and give the report from that character's perspective. I read Joni's autobiography for my report, so for the official report, I sat in a wheelchair and wore a little contraption on my arm. (In her book, she talked about how she feeds herself with a spoon hooked into an arm brace.)

So I dug up this picture from waaaaaaaaaaay back in the fifth grade.