New Glasses

You remember when I went to the eye doctor, right? {As if you could forget.} He declared my vision perfect {which I highly suspected was the case} and told me no glasses needed.

And he's right - except when it comes to matters of attitude. And then my vision tends to be not-better-than-20/20-like-it-is-in-real-life.

So here's my story/confession/recommendation for today. Got a minute?

If you've been around the blog for any length of time, you know that for the last four or five years, this little house of mine {and now ours} has gone on and off the market a handful of times. It started when I got my job in Fort Wayne in 2011, and my plan was to leave this town entirely and start over with a new life up there. So on the market it went. And stayed. And didn't sell.

Then I started dating this guy named Ryan...and we decided to get married, and we decided we couldn't handle merging lives and selling a house all at once, so we took it off the market. And then after putting some work into it, we put it back on. And it didn't sell again, so we took it back off...and so the story goes. On and off, on and off.

Most recently, we had hoped to sell it and move closer to Ryan's work to knock out his commute as well {we really didn't mean to sign up to be life-long commuters}. But it seemed like the lack of interest in our home was even more pronounced than ever before, even though the price was also lower than ever before, and the amount of work put into the house was more than ever. With that, we decided God must be purposefully blocking the sale of the house, which wasn't something we hated, necessarily. We had prayed many times for God to protect the house from selling if we aren't supposed to move. You can't ask that and then be mad when He does it, right?

But despite all that, I've been cranky about this house. I wanted to move. I wanted a new start somewhere else in a place that had always and only been uniquely ours as Shaffers. I had a huge list of things I wanted in a new house, which essentially made me side with all the people who had walked through our house and declared it cute...but not for them.

I began to suspect that even if God DID have a plan to sell this house eventually, He would not do so until I got my attitude whipped into shape, so I even went so far as to ask for prayer in our Sunday School class...prayer for a changed vision toward this house...this house that truly is warm, lovely, and full of beautiful memories.

I needed house glasses.

Last week, as I sat curled up reading a novel, I suddenly {which means it was a God-prompt} remembered a book sitting on my office shelf...one I've had for probably a year and never read. The Nesting Place by Myquillyn Smith. {She blogs as The Nester if this sounds vaguely familiar to you but you can't quite pinpoint why.}

Lynne interviewed Myquillyn about this book when it came out, and we happened to have an extra copy at the station, so Lynne offered it to me, knowing how much I love home decor and such. I gratefully accepted the book, but ever had time to read it. Until that day last week.

I put down the novel, retrieved the book and read it in 24 hours flat. And with each page I turned, I realized for me, this book was an eye exam and pair of house-glasses all in one paper appointment. I gulped at sentences like "Do you believe it's possible to love where you are, right now, today?" and "I trust that even though this might not be the exact home I'd choose, God chose it for me, and it is home."

And then...the surge of hope. "Giving up is the first step to creating the home you love," she said. "What if you already have everything you need to have the home you always wanted?"

I began to glance around our home. Did I? Did I already have it all and I just couldn't see it?

Yes, I did.

"The best way to start creating a beautiful home is by being grateful for what you already have," she said. Ouch. I have much to be grateful for, and I am grateful on some levels. Just wasn't grateful on enough of them.


"The real question is, What am I doing with what I've been given?" Largely complaining about it, unfortunately.

"I had been so foolish and wasteful. I finally came to terms with our shaky, we-have-no-idea-what-will-happen-next-week livelihood. I decided to trust that the God who is in charge of my eternal life could also be trusted with my everyday life." Yes. This. This is where I needed to be.

I closed the book with a sigh of relief and walked around my truly beautiful home and started to look at the blessings in the imperfections {lovely limitations, Myquillyn calls them} in each room. So the floor plan isn't so 2015. It's working just fine for the two of us, and Braeya doesn't get a vote. So the kitchen is small. Aren't tiny homes with tiny kitchens the new trend? On and on I went, finding the lovely in the limitations.

I sure am grateful Myquillyn Smith wrote The Nesting Place, and if you have some vision problems with your own home, you should give the book a read...it might just be the eye exam you need, too. I'm glad she willingly shared her own journey through 13 homes in 18 years of marriage, some of them dreadful and some of them spectacular. {The homes, not the years of marriage.} I'm glad she could point out the lovely in the sometimes EXTREME limitations.

And I'm grateful for my new prescription to see this home in its full spectrum of beauty.