Bits for Sunday, August 24, 2008

I like to consider myself fairly resourceful. Sometimes this translates to cheap. I’ll drive to three grocery stores to save thirteen cents on a loaf of bread. I’m the person who doesn’t have a stash of pocket change to use toward a vacation because I actually live on my pocket change. I’ll only make a purchase at Hobby Lobby if said item is half price that week. If it’s not, I will wait until it is – because at that point it has become a matter of principle. I view the forfeiting of a “ten dollars off ten dollars or more” coupon at Fashion Bug as actually throwing away ten dollars and will hunt carefully around the store for a purchase that brings me to $10.01 so I can pay pretty much tax only on my purchase and feel ever so excited about my frugal spirit. I purchase glue sticks in ridiculous quantities when school supplies are on sale so I have a year’s supply on hand and don’t have to pay the extra three cents a pack throughout the year.

Those are the minor things. I also heat my house with candles in the winter because I’m too cheap to run any sort of decent heat. If that doesn’t cut it, put on another sweatshirt and get under a blanket. (Thankfully cats have fur coats and so far they’ve not had to chip through ice in their water bowl, so all residents of my home seem to be happy.)

But it’s not just about saving money. It’s about figuring out how to make the best of things that don’t work as they should. For example…the light in my closet broke and I keep forgetting to ask the fix-it guy to fix it…so for now I just drag the floor lamp into the closet to find my clothes. Whenever I don’t have time to do that, I just grab something and hope it matches. If it doesn’t and someone has an issue with that…perhaps he or she would like to contribute to the light fund.

And if you think I’m going to be in any sort of hurry about that light – let me just tell you THIS. A year or so ago, the kitchen light (an Edison original) went out and it was a while before I rounded up an electrician to replace it. I was used to cooking by the glow of the Christmas lights above the cabinets, but when my sister came over to help me make broccoli salad one night, she gave me some strange looks when I pulled out the flashlight to check the status of the bacon on the stove.

I hadn’t realized just how much I temp-fix my house until today when I was talking to Mom before lunch. I told her that the radio in my bathroom has one of those flimsy cord-like antennas, and in order for me to pick up the station I need on Sunday morning (to hear my Dad’s program), I have to stretch it toward the towel bar and then stuff a towel around it to hold it in place. When I’m done, I have to coil up the cord and hide it in my makeup so Braeya doesn’t chew off any more of the end than she already has. The towel, at that point, needs to be relocated to its place over the bathroom door (over the top of it) to prevent the door from shutting…which locks the cats inside.

I’m afraid if the cats are locked inside and get bored, they’ll figure out how to get around the Tupperware onion storage container that currently hides the toilet handle. Braeya has a flushing addiction. That’s life at Bekah’s…flashlights, towels, and onion holders in the oddest of places.

There are some things, though, that the temp fixes just won’t cover. Remember how I just bought a new washer and dryer? Ever heard the saying that things happen in threes? Yeah. I think I have a second appliance about to croak. Literally.

I told Mom and Dad today that my refrigerator sounds like a pig being strangled. I even imitated the lovely screeching sound that has occasionally emanated from deep within it for the past several months. This weekend, said sound moved up to full time. I about moved out of my own house. Let the pig die!!!

Mom thought I was exaggerating. So I came home, called her, said, “Listen please” and stuck the phone in the freezer. When I returned to the phone, she said, “That is your REFRIGERATOR??? That doesn’t sound good.” As I was saying. Strangled pig.

Sigh. Yesterday I stood in the kitchen and shouted, “I don’t want to buy more appliances!!!!” The pig continued dying. I see another trip to the store in my very near future. Meanwhile, if things really do happen in threes, I hope the next appliance to go is something more along the lines of my toaster.