Once again, I’m not sure what to write about…and once again, the lack of writing material will not keep me from turning out two pages of yap.
I actually had great plans for what to say today. As of this morning, we officially have 89 days until this ridiculousness that is daylight savings time comes to an end…and I was going to write a tribute to the 80’s, counting backwards from 1989. But so many of those years are such a blur to me…especially 1981 when I was three. So I scrapped that plan.
And in the true fashion of lack of material, I reached into the Bekah-archives and found something for you. This is an excerpt of an article I wrote in college – and I called it “Daddilies.” The title is a spin-off of a book my Mom used to have, called “Mommilies” – and it shares all the things that Moms are so famous for saying and doing. (Speaking of which…Christian comedienne Anita Renfroe has the most hysterical set of “Mommilies” put to music. She has condensed every stereotypical Mom phrase to three minutes and sings them to the William Tell Overture. She was on Life Today last week and performed that song – I was crying by the end, and I’m not even a Mom. If you want to see it, you can go here - choose the Tuesday, July 31 broadcast - and hear her comedy followed by the song.)
So anyway, here’s one of the “Daddilies” I wrote about back in college:
Before retirement, Dad lived the life of a normal school teacher. He got up early, went to work, came home, graded papers, made tests and study guides, recorded and figured grades, plus all his household duties. Now that he’s retired, he lives the life of (I guess) a normal retired person. I’m not sure, but I think there must be a book out there somewhere that instructs retirees on what they are supposed to do once they have received the gold watch.
Promptly upon retirement, Dad developed an obsession with birds. We never had a single bird feeder during my growing up years. Now we have at least half a dozen…maybe more. We have the standard feeders and special feeders for finches, hummingbirds, bluebirds, and who knows what else. We also acquired a bird bath not too long ago.
One thing I didn’t realize for a long time is that just having the feeders and bath is not enough. You also have to plant vast amounts of flowers to attract the birds. I affectionately refer to our flowers as the weed patch. Our sweet little courtyard in the back has been overtaken by plants and bushes of all kinds, and there is some leafy monstrosity climbing up the side of our house. All this, you understand, is to attract the hummingbirds. Ironically, the leafy monstrosity has completely grown over one of the hummingbird feeders. You cannot see it at all. Mom and Dad say they never see any hummingbirds. I am quite convinced they are out there a lot, but you just can’t see them on account of the weeds.
Our finch feeder has nearly been swallowed by a gigantic sunflower that adorns the side of the barn. I would not even begin to tell you what kinds of plants have made a home under the big tree where most of the feeders hang. I do know that there used to be a lattice board next to the bird bath, but you can’t see that anymore on account of all the plants.
Another thing you need to know about bird obsessions…you must have a pair of binoculars, and a subscription to a bird magazine. Now I’m not against the binocular thing. I have used them on several occasions to try to see accidents out on the highway, whether or not our neighbors had electricity during a power outage, and a number of other fun sights. But to use them to see a bird two feet outside the back door? Give me a break!
I really knew Dad had reached a problem spot on this obsession when I saw him standing at the window one day saying, “Yeah we’ve had a hummingbird since seven this morning. Look at how much is gone out of that feeder!”
So that’s the Daddily for the week. I’ve long since moved out, but the bird/feeder/flower obsession has continued even in my absence. So far, it hasn’t continued here in my world. I do have a bird bath, but only because it was here when I moved in and to move it would have broken my back (and left a naked spot in the grass).
And just so you’ll know – Dad doesn’t care that I pick on him. He always says it means I’m leaving someone else alone. (All the Wal-Mart customers should thank him…)
I actually had great plans for what to say today. As of this morning, we officially have 89 days until this ridiculousness that is daylight savings time comes to an end…and I was going to write a tribute to the 80’s, counting backwards from 1989. But so many of those years are such a blur to me…especially 1981 when I was three. So I scrapped that plan.
And in the true fashion of lack of material, I reached into the Bekah-archives and found something for you. This is an excerpt of an article I wrote in college – and I called it “Daddilies.” The title is a spin-off of a book my Mom used to have, called “Mommilies” – and it shares all the things that Moms are so famous for saying and doing. (Speaking of which…Christian comedienne Anita Renfroe has the most hysterical set of “Mommilies” put to music. She has condensed every stereotypical Mom phrase to three minutes and sings them to the William Tell Overture. She was on Life Today last week and performed that song – I was crying by the end, and I’m not even a Mom. If you want to see it, you can go here - choose the Tuesday, July 31 broadcast - and hear her comedy followed by the song.)
So anyway, here’s one of the “Daddilies” I wrote about back in college:
Before retirement, Dad lived the life of a normal school teacher. He got up early, went to work, came home, graded papers, made tests and study guides, recorded and figured grades, plus all his household duties. Now that he’s retired, he lives the life of (I guess) a normal retired person. I’m not sure, but I think there must be a book out there somewhere that instructs retirees on what they are supposed to do once they have received the gold watch.
Promptly upon retirement, Dad developed an obsession with birds. We never had a single bird feeder during my growing up years. Now we have at least half a dozen…maybe more. We have the standard feeders and special feeders for finches, hummingbirds, bluebirds, and who knows what else. We also acquired a bird bath not too long ago.
One thing I didn’t realize for a long time is that just having the feeders and bath is not enough. You also have to plant vast amounts of flowers to attract the birds. I affectionately refer to our flowers as the weed patch. Our sweet little courtyard in the back has been overtaken by plants and bushes of all kinds, and there is some leafy monstrosity climbing up the side of our house. All this, you understand, is to attract the hummingbirds. Ironically, the leafy monstrosity has completely grown over one of the hummingbird feeders. You cannot see it at all. Mom and Dad say they never see any hummingbirds. I am quite convinced they are out there a lot, but you just can’t see them on account of the weeds.
Our finch feeder has nearly been swallowed by a gigantic sunflower that adorns the side of the barn. I would not even begin to tell you what kinds of plants have made a home under the big tree where most of the feeders hang. I do know that there used to be a lattice board next to the bird bath, but you can’t see that anymore on account of all the plants.
Another thing you need to know about bird obsessions…you must have a pair of binoculars, and a subscription to a bird magazine. Now I’m not against the binocular thing. I have used them on several occasions to try to see accidents out on the highway, whether or not our neighbors had electricity during a power outage, and a number of other fun sights. But to use them to see a bird two feet outside the back door? Give me a break!
I really knew Dad had reached a problem spot on this obsession when I saw him standing at the window one day saying, “Yeah we’ve had a hummingbird since seven this morning. Look at how much is gone out of that feeder!”
So that’s the Daddily for the week. I’ve long since moved out, but the bird/feeder/flower obsession has continued even in my absence. So far, it hasn’t continued here in my world. I do have a bird bath, but only because it was here when I moved in and to move it would have broken my back (and left a naked spot in the grass).
And just so you’ll know – Dad doesn’t care that I pick on him. He always says it means I’m leaving someone else alone. (All the Wal-Mart customers should thank him…)
3 comments:
Thanks again for going with me to the viewing, i appreciated that
You are welcome - I was very glad to have someone to go with so that it was less awkward! By the way, I called Amber later and she felt really guilty for cutting in line. LOL. I told her not to worry (because she felt REALLY REALLY REALLY guilty!). She said she didn't see us. Maybe we should have been louder??
Anita Renfroe is hilarious. I shared the broadcast with my co-workers and they enjoyed it too. I might get some of her books.
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