When I ran the 10K in 2012, I accomplished something I truly never thought I could do. I was not a runner. I was not athletic. I was not everything that a race of 6.2 miles seemed to require. I hung up my medal, smiled at my accomplishment and moved on to wedding planning. I did not figure running toward a goal, toward a finish line, would ever be something I did again.
And certainly not a goal of 13.1 miles. Thirteen miles were made to be driven in an air conditioned car, not pounded out on pavement one footstep at a time.
I never meant to run a half. And Ryan told me the other day one thing he said he would NEVER do was run a half marathon.
And so of course, we've both registered for the Haiti Half, because this is how our life works. {I know I haven't said much about Ryan doing this with me, mostly because the focus of these posts has been about what God has done in my heart. But yes, Ryan is running too, at his own pace this time, but taking on the challenge with me, and doing a magnificent job, I might add.}
So week 3 of my training is done now.
I ran a total of 14 miles that week, which means if I could only have a week to complete the race, I could do it. Oh wait. I don't get a week, do I?
Summer marched on, with the first day of running bringing hot {stifling, I wrote} temperatures, and my legs and lungs and head felt like lead. I pushed through, miserable with a time to match, but I did it. And then I went out the next day and did it again. And the day after that...the run that felt the best of any I'd done so far. Things were looking up. And then came the day I started out in a crowded frame of mind. We had much to do that day, and it was hard to keep focused. The weather shifted from pleasant to just HOT while we ran, and I struggled to finish well.
But on each day, I did it. I got through to the assigned finish line for that day.
And ironically, finish lines were the lesson for me that week. God kept my mind focused on the same verse as last week: Hebrews 12:1 - "let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin
that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race
marked out for us."
But this time, the emphasis was on the last phrase: the race marked out for us.
We've established that I am not a runner. I'm still not a runner. Making a crazy good time on the clock is not my gig and won't be. It's not how I'm crafted. My body doesn't glide with good form, and my face doesn't relax into a smile like that viral picture of the happy runner at whatever marathon a couple of years ago. I probably look like I'm about to give birth, and I know I feel like it. Ryan can run almost twice as fast as I can. His times always surpass mine by embarrassing levels.
And if I set all those things in the front of my mind and thought about them while I ran, I would be so discouraged. SO discouraged. I'd be trying to run the race of the real athletes that sprint by while I huff and puff and grasp my water bottle. I'd be trying to match Ryan's pace, which is not even Bekah-ly possible. My job, on each day of training and on the day of the race, is to run the race marked out FOR ME. The route might match that of all the other runners, but the pace and the journey will be mine. And my job is to run THAT race.
The first week I trained, Ryan and I ran one day at the lake, and there was a 5K happening in that town that morning. As we came home from a rather lackluster and frustrating run, I snapped a selfie with the finish line of the 5K behind me. I joked that I should take that picture because I might never make it to the finish line of the half. A funny joke, but the truth is, that wasn't my finish line. That picture is meaningless {even if funny} because that wasn't my race. It holds no value because it wasn't mine. My job is to run the race set out for me.
I have to run my race in honor of all those in Haiti who have to run their races...which also don't look like mine. Mine might not be the prettiest or the fastest, but it's mine, and I'm called to it.
{** For those of you who have registered, and I know there have been some, and others of you pondering it, I read on the event Facebook page yesterday that due to low registration numbers, they're postponing the half portion of this event until next year, but the 5K will go on as scheduled. Ryan and I still plan to run the 5K and would love for any of you to join us. If running a half is daunting but a 5K seems feasible, think about it!!**}
{Previous posts on this topic.}
The Haiti Half
Learning in Training #1
Learning in Training #2
2 hours ago