Sunday, March 4, 2007

I am not smarter than a fifth grader. Did anyone else watch that new show this week? I stayed tuned after American Idol just to see how smart I really am. After three nights of questions, I have no idea how I made it this far in adulthood. Clearly I am a stupid woman.

And yet, the show truly proves the point that I tried to make time and time again during school – Why do I need to know this stuff? It won’t ever matter!! Teachers assured me that it would, in fact, matter at some point in my life. I think this week’s quiz alongside some ultra-cute, ultra-personality-laden ten year olds was the first time such knowledge was ever needed.

So I submit to you the following things that make me boldly say, “I am not smarter than a fifth grader,” along with my statements of why that is a-ok with me!

* I guessed right that Columbus Day is in October – only because my Dad’s birthday is somewhere around Columbus Day. In the real world, though, Columbus Day is not a paid work holiday, so why do I need to know when it falls?

* On a total whim, I guessed that polar bears do not feed on penguins. How was I supposed to know that they live on opposite ends of the planet? Hasn’t anyone watched Lost? Polar bears live just about anywhere they want to, whether or not it makes sense.

* If a triangle has an area of 16 square inches and a base of 8 inches, how high are the sides? Well it isn’t 8 inches, I can tell you that. Turns out, it’s 4. About all I know of triangles is that they make the shape of a yield sign on the road – now that is actual useful information – especially if there’s a car coming!

* Red + yellow = orange. I knew that. Brick red + peach - primer = pink. Learned that one the hard way. Also learned that two shades of reddish brown faux-painted over said pink makes a great shade of terra cotta.

* Did you know the sun is a star? It is, and it’s the closest star to earth. I knew that one too, but more importantly, I’d like to know where the sun is these days. I have some snow that needs to melt.

* The lady on the show did not know that Canada’s border with the U.S. is longer than Mexico’s border with the U.S. Apparently the longer border does not speak louder than the trouble-laden border. Another point scored for the squeaky wheel.

* After much thought, I correctly guessed that there are 200 decades in two millennia. Given that my own life span is closer to two decades than two hundred, this hasn’t really mattered to me yet. Two decades can, however, feel like two hundred. Or two millennia for that matter.

* I must admit that I, the writing major, incorrectly answered the question, “How many times does the letter E appear in Pledge of Allegiance?” I guessed five. Turns out allegiance is not spelled allegience. Apparently it does not matter that I actually know the pledge and learned in Girls’ State how to properly position my hand over my heart while reciting the pledge. Probably doesn’t matter that I also know three verses to the Star Spangled Banner.

* The Big Dipper is not in the constellation Orion, but rather in Ursa Major. I didn’t know about Ursa Major. I know that Ursula was a big bad sea villain in The Little Mermaid. Guess that doesn’t matter.

* I did not know that there are 15 teaspoons in 5 tablespoons. I guessed 10. But hey, I can make a mean batch of chocolate chip cookies, proving I know how to actually use teaspoons and tablespoons. Isn’t that all that counts?

* Do you know what element on the periodic table is symbolized with NA? No, I sure didn’t. I passed Chemistry by the grace of God and Mr. McBride. I haven’t looked at a periodic table since. All I know is that sodium is bad for you. Doesn’t keep me from enjoying it.

* I correctly guessed that the largest species of bear is the polar bear. See? That first season of Lost is helping!

So I’m not smarter than a fifth grader. Shoot, on the third night, I wasn’t even smarter than a first grader.

Know what that proves?

All you really need to know, you learned in Kindergarten.

And My Thoughts on the Girls' Night

I forgot my notes at home - yes, I actually make notes. I have inherited my mother's short short-term memory, so if I don't write it down, I forget it. But we're down for the count here at work again, so I thought I'd take advantage of the moment to post my thoughts - at least as much as I can remember:

* Alaina - I've never been crazy about her and I'm still not crazy about her. I thought she did better this week than last, but she's not nearly in the league of some of the others.

* Antonella - My opnion from Alainia carries over to her. If the two of them went home this week, that would be absolutely fine with me. I'm not crazy about their personality or their talent.

* Gina - I still struggle with her. I thought she did a good job last night, but she's still a little bit too full of herself for my tastes.

* Hayley - I think she is beautiful, I think she and her fiance make a terrific looking couple, and I think she has good talent. I also think she did a great job of taking the criticism they gave her last week and implementing it. Where she lost me was in the critique this week. I am trying to give her the benefit of the doubt that she cried because she was emotional over the dedication and disappointment in their comments. But to me it came across as flippant before the tears and she lost all my vote (as if I vote!) there.

* Jordin - She is just as cute as she can be, and I have such a hard time remembering how young she is. Unlike Sanjaya, I think she can contend with the largely mature crowd. She fits right in with people 8-10 years her senior. I hope she stays.

* Lakisha - She is amazing and better not be one of those that gets out early because people forgot to vote for her. I was VERY happy that Simon left her weight alone.

* Leslie - MUCH better than last week. She got my vote for most improved. She's still not as good as many of the others, but she did a lot better.

* Melinda - I agree 100% with the judges. Her humble attitude is going to take her as far as her voice. She is amazing. She and Lakisha are my top two favorites.

* Sabrina - Great closing to the show. I thought she did great despite a couple of weak notes. She's powerful.

* Stephanie - I loved her sassy hair and her sassy song. I do think she was better last week, but she was still REALLY good.

Nice Improvement, Guys

I was relieved to see there was at least a MEASURE of talent among the Idol guys last night. Here's my quick list of how I felt about the performances:

* Phil - I didn't think he did as good a job as he did last week, but the fact that he's my pick for the best looking guy overrode that.

* Jared - I really did not like his song, but he was really funny after the song - talking to Simon about the Love Boat. That saved it for me.

* AJ- I don't even remember what he sang, and it was just whatever for me.

* Sanjaya - I was cringing all the way through. I like Sanjaya and I think he's cute, but it really was like a bad high school musical/show choir/talent show for me. I was glad Randy thought so too - I didn't feel so crazy.

* Chris Sligh - He's MARRIED?? That was my surprise of the night. I've not looked to see if the contestants have complete profiles on the website - and if there's one out there, maybe it says he's married. But I had no idea he had a wife! Wear a ring, boy!! Good song - what I heard of it after being so surprised about the marriage thing.

* Nick - SAPPY. He did a good job - and I actually sort of knew that song - but he still isn't my favorite.

* Blake - my favorite of the night. Good job - loved the beatboxing making an appearance - loved it! Fortunately I didn't know the original version, so I can't say that he was a copycat.

* Brandon - He was on my top three last week but this week he was more in AJ's league in my book.

* Chris R - HATED that song. I thought he sounded like he was rushing to get in all the words, I couldn't understand him, and I thought it was awful all the way around. And then the judges gave him the performance of the night vote. Go figure.

* Sundance - I had SO wanted him to go home last week but I liked him a small bit this week. Maybe the baby sob story won me over.

That's my thought! Phats? Christina? Others?

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Yesterday I bought a 1081 page keyboard. Yes, you read that right. J I ventured away from home (on my day of rest and writing) just long enough to purchase a new keyboard. It had occurred to me that the one my friend Jim loaned me a few weeks ago is still sitting here in use – and it’s just a loaner keyboard. The goal is for me to purchase a new one of my own.

So I made my way to Staples, but no one seemed super interested in helping, and I couldn’t find anything that really looked inexpensive enough, so I left and went to the bookstore instead. I was sucked into the $4.99 sale. Why does that always happen to me? I’m such a sucker for books. I called Mom on the way home to tell her that I was returning home keyboardless (sorry, Jim…I promise to get yours back to you soon!) but with a sack full of new books. She asked what books I bought, and I said, “Oh, I don’t know. Ones that were on sale.” That should have clued me in right there…an unnecessary purchase!

Oh but it’s been so long since I bought a new book…or a new anything that wasn’t really urgent. The post-Christmas/extra-heat months are always the ones filled with minimal shopping. But in my defense, let me just say that between the sale and a few dollars left on a gift card, my out of pocket expense for said purchase was only $21.32. That’s really good for six books!

So last night, after the laundry, the cleaning, the cooking dinner, the writing, the batch of cookies, and the near-death-inducing elliptical workout, I snuggled down in bed, extra fleece piled high, to read a chapter in one of the books and watch as much of Sarah, Plain and Tall as I could stay awake to see. (Such is a day in Bekahland.)

I’ve been told by multiple people during this past week that I’ve been quiet. That usually worries people – because I am a bit of a motor mouth. I received several concern-laden “Are you okay?” conversation-starters this week. And yes, I am fine. I just have a lot on my mind. If I understood it…if I knew where it was leading…if I could follow the path…I would explain it. But I don’t understand or know right now. I just know God is moving and doing something and if I talk too much, I might miss an important piece of the puzzle. So I’m practicing the “Be still and know that I am God” part.

So last night, when I got to the end of chapter one in Lisa Bevere’s book, Kissed the Girls and Made Them Cry, I found this tucked into the end of her prayer for her readers. “Let the issues that need to be put to rest be ultimately put to rest. Dispel my fears and draw me under the safety of Your wings. Open my heart and tell me Your stories so I can know and understand Your purpose.”

Her chapter had been titled “God’s Bedtime Story,” and I really liked the vision that brought to my mind. I remember the days when I was little and my Dad used to come into my room when I was about to fall asleep. Rather than reading me a story from a book, he’d sit beside my bed and tell me Bible stories. That’s where I got my start in having a fighting chance to win a round of Bible trivia. By the time he was done telling me the stories, I was ready for sleep. I was done being energized, I was done fidgeting, I was done arguing with the call to rest.

Even though I don’t know what God is doing, and I don’t know His timetable, I like the idea of resting with His Voice of peace lulling me to sleep. I like the permission to be quiet before Him and wait for Him to speak. Even last night, as I buried myself under the blankets and left Sarah and Jacob behind on the TV screen to figure out that they were really in love and that Kansas was the place to be, I felt very peaceful. Very ready to be done trying to figure out what God was saying and let Him tell me in His time.

God so nicely melted all the ice we got yesterday so that I could make my way to church, because He had things to say to me there. My friend Julie sang the great song, In the Presence of Jehovah, and I was reminded that troubles vanish…hearts are mended…in the presence of the King. Pastor Brian preached about listening to God’s voice to know when to stay and fight a battle and when to run from the battle, and I was reminded that to hear the Voice, I have to be still.

Even on the way home, my Selah CD rolled around to Be Still My Soul…and even though this particular verse is not in their version, it’s the verse God has planted in my heart so many times this week: Be still my soul – thy God doth undertake to guide the future as He has the past; Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake – all now mysterious shall be bright at last. Be still my soul – the waves and winds still know His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

I’m thankful I ended up with Lisa’s book instead of a new keyboard, because I needed to know that God has a story for me, and I needed to be prompted to keep listening. Whatever He has for me is not far away, I don’t think. I want to be prepared when He announces His plan. I want to be rested by His bedtime story, safe in His presence, and listening for His voice.

The End of the Samplings

At last - the end of the pictures from last Sunday's scrapbooking post!

Here is the picture of the day I served as a TP model for a bridal shower. My team was great - jewelry, bouquet, and the whole nine yards!! Too bad we didn't win. :(

This is shortly after the COMPLETELY incoherent conversation I had with Ronnie Booth at the concert. I think the only recognizable word that came out of my mouth was "Picture?" as I wildly pointed to a camera to further communicate my point. He was very gracious...

And then this was the next day - when I had to sit down after shopping and seeing Ronnie out shopping too. This is probably one of the WORST pictures ever taken of me - but it was still funny.

More Scrapbook Samplings - Almost Done!

This is the crawling fruit pizza filling that created quite a disaster the night before my roommate's graduation open house. One of my friends had stopped by to see me while I was making it, so she tried to help - but it didn't cooperate any better for her.

I'll spare you all seven pictures, but this was during the signing of the book-o-papers for my house purchase. I think this may have been when reality officially hit.



This was from the living room painting project. My ceilings are wallpapered (I didn't do it - the person who lived here before me did it) and I was trying to make it look like a tin ceiling. It turned out really great - after it stopped looking so PINK and I was no longer covered in red paint!

This is from the Christmas party when I ruined half the food. I was trying to unwrap my gifts while getting my nose to not look so Rudolphy. :)

New Friends

Well okay they're not new, but they're new to my blog list. I just thought I'd tell you who they were - some of you might know each other. Anyway, these friends of mine are the four newest links at the end of my list.

Angela - was my roommate for three years after college. She (and her cat Igor) lived with Kaegan and me while she worked on continuing her education. You'd think I would have learned to do the same, but I'm still recovering from undergrad - STILL. Anyway, even though she moved out (and has added Mara to her cat family) - she is still a very good friend and a GREAT listener!!!

The Hutchins Family - Marty and I went to college together and Lori and I went to church together. They were married a few years ago (Some of you might remember the story of me falling through the aisle runner at a wedding? That was the Hutchins wedding) and now they have a little boy and another baby on the way. They're moving back to our area after living on the west coast since they were married. I'm excited to have them coming back!

Jenna - was a student worker in my office. You might recognize her from the Focus Twins picture. She's a sweetheart and I miss her so much in the office. I loved it when she came back to sit and chat!!!!

Cathy Hunnicutt - worked in my office when I was still a student worker myself. When she left, I ended up with her job. She was a great friend and encourager and is now battling breast cancer. Her blog is an update on her journey - and I know she would appreciate any extra prayers!!!

Scrapbook Sampling #4

HERE is the wax disaster. The pile on top of the buffet are all the napkins and paper towels we'd used to wipe up the initial spill. You can see all the wax on the front of the buffet - even in the handles. And of course, the infamous wax puddle on the floor.

Because I don't want him to hate me, I've cropped the guy out - but this was the sweater that ended up looking like underwear. I PROMISE IT'S REALLY A SWEATER!!!!

American Idol: My Picks for the Girls Night

I have to say that I was relieved to hear those girls sing last night. Renewed my hope in the season! My picks for the guys yesterday were more picks of what was best among what I had to work with. Last night my picks were for actual TALENT because I finally saw some!!!

Stephanie Edwards won my vote first off. WOW that girl can sing! What a way to open the night! I was super impressed (and in pain) with her ability to slam down onto her knees like that in heels and a skirt! And then she got back up with so much grace! You go, girl! I like her. She's spunky and sassy and she can sing.

And then I really liked Sabrina Sloan. Thought there for a minute it might be the night of the S's for me. She was excellent. I really enjoyed watching her have fun out there. I used to be leery of people who came in as professional singers - I'm not sure if I thought they had too much experience or if I thought since they were already singers, they should leave Idol to those who didn't have a chance otherwise or what, but by last night I was just so desperate for real talent, I was happy to see Sabrina!

I've been a fan of Melinda Doolittle since auditions becuase she was SO GOOD without being SO ARROGANT. I loved her last night. After her comment about how far it truly is from the background mic to the main mic, I thought she owned it nicely. And yet she was so grateful for the feedback! I really like her. She's a nice girl with a great voice and she deserves to go far.

And rounding out my top four (yes four today!) is Lakisha Jones. That girl rocked! I wasn't sure I'd like her singing a Jennifer Hudson song because I can't stand Jennifer Hudson (I respect her talent but always found her to be very full of herself during her Idol season). Then I remembered I've never heard Jennifer sing the song, so who cares whose song it is? You go, Lakisha!

My surprise of the night was Gina Glocksen. She was the sole contestant I had an opinion about before the start of the 24. And it's not a favorable opinion. She's struck me as someone who feels she's owed another chance, when I think she should be grateful for it. (That may not be the case at all - it's just how she comes across to me.) Because of that, I was prepared to write her off last night, but she did a good job! She might win me yet.

WHAT IS UP WITH RYAN AND SIMON? I thought they'd calmed down until Simon accused Ryan of wanting a date with whatever girl that was (I wasn't impressed with her song, so I don't remember who she was.) Good for him for saying that didn't deserve a response, but WOW the claws are out between those two this year!!!

And finally - I agreed with Simon (as I often do...just don't like to say it) that the dog walker seemed out of her element - like she was trying too hard. OH! And Hayley Scarnato did sound old with her song. I like that song very much but she sounded like a beauty pageant contestant - too much vibrato and not enough spunk. When Celine spunks a song, you can't unspunk it and expect it to sound the same.

So there - Phats, I'll go see what you thought now!! Christina?? Any thoughts this week?

Scrapbook Sampling #3

Here is the kissing the frog picture. Could my nose look any bigger? Not sure. Anyway, Skyepuppy - here's the tiara you asked about! To explain the background...this was a work party, held in a spare office. We had these giant sticky notes on the walls with our brainstorming of how to have a better office flow. One of my co-workers is pointing to the line that says "more marriage counseling." How appropriate.

And here is my "hole in ten" pic. I am SO not a good mini-golfer. Everyone else got a hole in one with a celebratory picture. This is me: combo of mourning my lack of a hole in one and also experiencing pure dread for the go-cart racing they were about to make me do.

My American Idol Picks for the Guys' Night

This is the first season I've NOT had strong feelings for or against constestants before the top 24 were selected. Going into last night, my main pick was Chris Sligh - the guy with the Jack Osbourne hair. I like him because he's very funny AND he can sing. I didn't think he was the best singer, but I loved his personality so much that he was my pick. He didn't make my top 3 for last night, but I thought he did a good job and he handled Simon's rather rude Teletubby comment with much dignity.

Last night my top three pics were as follows:

Brandon Rogers - he could have sung the phone book off key and I wouldn't have cared. Did anyone see those EYES?? He's going to be the Ace Young/Constantine Maroulis of this season when it comes to working the camera with the eyes.

Blake Lewis - I didn't like him at all in the auditions because of the beatboxing thing but he has really grown on me since, and I thought he did a great job last night of showing he can do something BESIDES that. However, I agreed with the judges - that is his thing and he should work it in every week in some way.

Phil Stacey - I was NOT a fan of him initially because he missed his baby's birth to audition and I thought that was a misplaced priority. But he's gotten much cuter since the first audition and I think he's a little less flippant than I first thought. And he was a GREAT end to last night's lineup.

My two least favorite were Sundance (just painful all around) and Sanjaya (which made me sad because I thought he was amazing in auditions).

I'm interested to see who wins me over and who makes me mad in the girls' round tonight!

Scrapbook Sampling #2

I know this doesn't do full justice to the Pippi Longstocking pigtails, but it did best capture the whole jammie outfit - complete with princess socks and teddy bear slippers. This party happened in the winter...can I tell you how nervous I was to drive across town on snow and ice in my jammies with this hair? I could only imagine explaining to the paramedics...

And this was the matching Focus adventure. Skyepuppy - have we persuaded you now that the Focus is the coolest way to go??? And do you like how we wore shirts the opposite color of our cars? We didn't even plan that part! More proof that great minds think alike...

Scrapbook Sampling #1

I thought I would allow you to see some of the pictures I mentioned in Sunday's scrapbook ranting. The first one here is of the "I ordered medium, not well done" comment written on my leg. It's kind of fuzzy - sorry. And all the weird things in the corners are other pictures overlapping on the page.

And this is the picture of me (fresh from a highlight - hence the undone hair) in my day of looking like David Phelps. I'm not sure if it was the blue shirt that made me decide we were twins or what...

Holiday Alert

I was informed last week that my announcement of National Popcorn Day was off...apparently the REAL National Popcorn Day is not the day my calendar said. I've decided this thing is only semi-reliable because it also says that President's Day is tomorrow. That would be great news for those of you who get the day as a real holiday...because then you'd have two in a row!

I am one of the fortunate few who gets to observe President's Day as a national work day, complete with full work hours, heels, and dress pants. Lucky me.

But in other news...to inform you of days coming up soon...

Wednesday is Ash Wednesday and the start of Lent. This will be my first time in two years to not participate in Lent. I'm not sure what I'd give up that would not also require my sanity. (Giving up coffee or chocolate would do just that.) But I suppose God could change my mind in the next two days and give me a suggestion of what I need to give up. (Hopefully it's not Grey's Anatomy or American Idol!)

And to round out the week, Saturday is National Tortilla Chip day. I cannot express enough my thankfulness for holidays that revolve around food. But this one is going to present a problem for those who give up tortilla chips for lent!

So happy week to everyone!

Sunday, February 18, 2007

I probably spent more hours this week scrapbooking than I did eating and sleeping combined. And I got extra eating and sleeping time this week – if that tells you anything. Since I got my first (and potentially last) snow days ever in the working world, I decided to use them wisely and scrap to my heart’s content. Those adventures were followed by an all day scrapfest yesterday.

I know, I know. You wonder why it matters. What’s the point of spending so many hours and so much money on books that are just going to sit on the shelf? Well, they don’t just sit on my shelf. In fact, I just got done looking at them – all of them. I decided to honor my hard work and go back through and see just what I’ve been up to since I graduated from college.

There are many laughs in those pages. Crazy moments that I’d have long forgotten if it weren’t for the pictures. And while most of them are not significant to who I am as a person, they remind me of many happy days.

Some of these days you’ve heard about. Some you haven’t. But let me just give you a glimpse into the crazy days of Bekahland, captured forever in my books –

…Like the time I stopped at my then-boyfriend’s house after I’d gotten a little too fried in the tanning bed (don’t lecture me about tanning beds – I quit going after the wedding I was in that summer) and he wrote on my leg “I asked for medium, not well done.”

…The time I decided David Phelps and I had the same hair going on, so I posed with my autographed picture of him just to show how much alike we looked. (We really didn’t.)

…Then there was my friend Lynette’s pajama party where I wore my hair in pigtails that stuck straight out like Pippi Longstocking’s.

…One of our student workers and I ended up getting “matching” Ford Focuses within a month of each other. Well, hers was red and mine was white, but otherwise they matched. We pulled them into the grass on campus and took pictures with our matching cars. Some guys gave us some funny looks for that. What! Is the Focus not a cool car?

…The office threw me a birthday party when I turned 25, and they made me don a tiara and kiss a stuffed frog – one of my more unflattering pictures – but still funny!

…I’d like to forget this one, but it’s scrapped in stone. I went miniature golfing with a bridal party one time and every single girl got a hole in one but me. So for the “hole in one” page, there are pictures of everyone celebrating, and me pouting on the sidewalk. Hey, isn’t a hole in ten just as good?

…The “Thanksgiving” when half the family was gone, half of the remaining half got sick, and during the meal for the few that showed up, my three-wick candle overflowed down the front of my buffet and onto my carpet. Did I mention the candle was red and the carpet was beige? I spent a good hour ironing wax out of the carpet while everyone else relaxed after lunch. Chipping wax off the buffet was fun too.

…There’s the famous Christmas picture where I’m sitting next to a guy I brought home to meet the parents (it didn’t last), and I’m holding up a black v-neck sweater with a white shirt underneath. The only problem is, you can’t see the black sweater – all you see is the v-shape of the white shirt, and it looks like I’m holding up underwear while sitting next to this potential boyfriend. This did not lead to the demise of the “relationship.” I don’t think…

…I learned my electric mixer was not high quality while trying to mix up the filling for a fruit pizza for my roommate’s graduation open house. There’s a picture of the cream cheese concoction climbing all the way up the beaters – to the bottom of the mixer – and nothing left in the bowl.

…I have seven pictures of various stages of fright while I signed paper after paper during the purchase of my home. The more I signed, the more scared I looked!

…There’s the night I had a face-off with my sister in an Andy Griffith trivia game. I was so engrossed in trying (in vain) to win that I forgot to sit like a lady for the pictures. I had to censor a few of those before I scrapped them!

…And then there’s the monumental day when I painted my living room ceiling red and found myself under a rain of red drops. Bad enough…but then I ran out of paint and had to go to the store while looking like I’d been through a bloodbath.

…My Rudolph-esque nose in a Christmas party picture. I’d invited friends over for dinner and a movie and the main dish didn’t fit in my crock pot, leaving me upset to start with…but then I ran dessert over in the oven and smelled up the whole house like burned sugar. Did I learn nothing from the Food Network?

…The priceless day of serving as a toilet paper bride model during a wedding shower. My first and last strapless dress. With my first big sigh, it split right down the front.

…And rounding out the scrappable moments was my picture taken just last summer with Ronnie Booth. (He’s a singer – I know, I know – you all don’t know your southern gospel.) Anyway, I was so nervous to meet him, I actually developed a stutter and said nothing of any coherent nature during our “conversation.” That picture is topped only by the one taken the next day after I happened to see him out and about shopping. The sighting so unnerved me that I had to go sit down outside the store. Apparently I don’t handle celebrity sightings well.

So this is part of why I love to scrap. Though many of my pages only save humiliating moments, I’m glad I’ve got them captured. They were still good memories…even if I only appreciated them after the fact!

No Matter What They Say....

I was told last year, upon delivering a Christmas card that I have way too much time on my hands. I have to admit it stung a little - okay a lot. I know that handmade cards aren't everyone's thing, but I really enjoy making them.

BUT, regardless of what they say, I guarantee you I wouldn't have been able to find a "thank you for fixing my flat tire" card. I sure can make one, though! I thought it turned out a little bit cute, so I thought I'd post it.

I figured the guys that fixed my tire deserved a little thank you and a gift card to a well deserved meal out. My guess is they'll take the gift card and the girls of the family will confiscate the thank you card. :)

Tire Tales

Life in Bekahland...always an adventure. Here's the latest:

I left home after lunch yesterday and was headed to the gas station for my iced tea when I passed a guy who was digging his car out. One end of my block is apartment housing, and tons of students live down there. With 3+ people sharing most of the apartments, you can imagine that the street parking is a nightmare. So there I was, trying to slip and slide my car through double parked cars WHILE not hitting Mr. Shoveler boy. I thought he might not appreciate my 20-volume rendition of David Phelps' Star Spangled Banner, so I turned down my radio.

Then I heard it. This crazy loud not-good-for-a-car sound. That was weird. Wondered how long that had been grinding underneath my Phelps-fest. So I drove on to the gas station and the faster I drove, the louder it got. GREAT. I got my tea and drove back to the office. Same sound. Weird. As I got out of my car and walked behind it to walk into work - I saw it. A flat tire.

Trying to remain calm, I called Dad. That's what a girl does, right? Dad was sick. Mom suggested I call maintenance. Oh yeah. With four billion feet of snow on the premises, they sure have time to fix a flat tire. So I called my friend Amber. Her husband is a big strapping boy and with the school systems still out for the day, maybe he'd have time to look at it. She said she'd send him over. Well, he came over and told me that he had class, so he wouldn't be able to look at it until later.

I admit it. I cried. BAWLED. Not so much for the flat as for the asking for help. I hate asking for help. So I called my friend Jen, and between hiccups, I told her I had a flat. She said that her husband and son were out digging out sidewalks and she'd call them and send them right over.

They were there in about ten minutes. Sweeties that they are, they put the donut on my car and then followed me to Tire Barn. The guys there told me that they could fix my tire but I really needed new ones. I'd already known that but was trying to ignore it. So I let them get the tire mostly fixed (from the 1/2 inch screw that poked a hole in it) and THEN decided to spring for new tires. I could tell by the look on the tire guy's face that I was being such a girl. Sure! Let us fix the tire and THEN change your mind and decide to shop. Woops. Sorry guys!

So anyway, I was super thankful that the schools were out for a snow day so that Dwight and Nathan were not at work and school - and I was thankful they were already in the area and willing to help. In the absence of my Dad, I was also very grateful that Dwight could be there while I bought the tires - I trusted his judgement on which ones to buy and felt confident the tire guys weren't ripping off a stupid girl with bad tires. And even more than that, I'm glad I didn't go to Indy last weekend - imagine this little episode happening on the side of the interstate!!!

Valentine's Day A Day Late

I said I was coming back yesterday for the "official post." Apparently I was just kidding. For as productive as I was on my first day off - I was just as UNproductive on the second. I couldn't get it together! And then I was able to spend the end of the day with my friends Jim and Jaena - who invited me over for a great dinner and cookie baking party. It was a super way to end the day! :) They even got me a rose! Yay!

Anyway - I had planned to post this, so I'll just do it a day late and a dollar short. I wrote this last year, when I really celebrated Valentine's Day to the hilt. I didn't do it up QUITE as much this year, but I still believe in what I wrote last year!

There’s only two days left until Valentines Day! Have you ordered my flowers yet? Just kidding!! Here is something new I learned this year – I truly had no idea before a couple of weeks ago. Almost everyone I know either hates Valentines Day or just doesn’t see the point in it. Now I know that I hated Valentines Day for about the first 25 years of my life. But I thought that all my significant-other-bearing friends would enjoy the “day of love” set apart for them. But I’m learning that people either find it too commercialized, too expensive, or too pointless.

Last Monday night, I shared my opinions of the holiday with my Ladies Bible Study. I told them how up until a couple of years ago, I wore black every year on Valentines Day and drowned my loveless sorrows in a Dairy Queen Blizzard. I told them how I turned my head when I saw the florist arriving (for the fifth time?) at work with yet another overdone bouquet of flowers some obliging husband sent his wife.

And now times are changin’. This year I spent probably about the same amount of time on Valentines Day that I did on Christmas. Okay not quite that much. The house isn’t nearly so decked out. But still – many hours. I made Valentines for my friends and for my family. I baked and iced cookies. I made fudge. I bought little presents for the kids in my life. I even have an outfit all picked out for Tuesday – and there’s red in it!

I read 1 Corinthians 13 to the ladies at Bible Study – the famous “love chapter.” And I said to them – Really…for a Christian…is there any better holiday? We are supposed to be about love. We get a whole day when everyone’s focus is already shoved that direction. It’s the biggest open door we’ll ever get! Let’s make this our day!! Let’s show love all over the place!
“And now I will show you the most excellent way” (1 Cor. 12:31 ). Love is the best. And I don’t need a husband to love. I have people all around me who need love. And on that day I have ten thousand extra reminders hitting me in every direction – reminding me to reach out to them and love them!

“If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing” (1 Cor. 13:2). It doesn’t matter who I am, what I can do, how smart I am, how charitable I am, or how much I have – if everything about me isn’t drenched in love, it doesn’t matter. Oh dear – I have a feeling God will remind me of that when I’m next in line at the Wal-Mart and the flashing light goes on and we have to wait for quarters.

And then of course there’s the famous list – love is patient and kind and not rude and not easily angered (Wal-Mart again?), etc. That’s how it’s done! If I want to show the love that I should show to everyone around me, then I need to get busy becoming those things to all the people who flutter around me in my day.

And then there was this little verse: “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me” (1 Cor. 13:11 ). When I was acting like a child, I wore black to protest a holiday I found stupid – just because I was bitter that I couldn’t participate the way most other people could. I insisted upon consuming calories and fat grams to try to forget my problems – when really it just made the black clothes tighter.

And not that I’m the super grown-up girl now – we ALL know better than that. But now I’m starting to see that this day does have a purpose – and one not centered around boys or flowers or dinners out. It matters because it gives me a chance to love – with cookies and fudge and cards – and maybe some extra patience.

So I don’t know whether you love or hate this upcoming holiday. I don’t know whether or not you have anyone special to share it with. I don’t know whether or not you want to fast forward time from the 13th to the 15th and just forget the day exists. But I do know that you have people in your life who need to know you love them. People who need to feel like they matter to someone. People who want a hug – or an email – or a rose – or a buddy to eat a Blizzard with. And the most excellent way for you to spend the day is to look for ways to share that love with them.

When Reality Hits

I have an official "Valentines Day post" for later - but for now - reality has hit. Mom called at 7 something this morning to tell me she'd heard on the radio that work was closed again. GOOD THING since the radio station I'm continuing to listen to (and work continues to have on the list) was definitely STILL not reporting the closure.

This is really exciting, actually. Another day at home...I can finish my scrapping...I can watch more episodes of Northern Exposure...I can eat some of the Izzie fest...it's a holiday...now it's a paid holiday for me. This is super!

And then I opened my front door. GOOD GRIEF. Apparently the drifting got a little worse than I realized while I was in dreamland. It took me 40 minutes to shovel out my sidewalk. (My first priority is always to the mailman.) I really don't have that big a sidewalk. It was just deep snow. And when I got to the side of the house where my driveway is, I almost decided to give up driving for the next three weeks. I've never had a drift like that in front of my garage. Granted, there are worse drifts in life. I've seen MUCH worse at Mom and Dad's during my growing up years. But those were the drifts DAD shoveled. This is the drift that Bekah shovels.

So snow day one was fun. The running around in jammies and watching TV and scrapping and all that. Snow day two is pure adulthood reality. I came in for sustenance, a big glass of water, and a chance to warm up. But I can already feel my back starting to stiffen up, so I'm headed back out to unearth the driveway.

Someone PLEASE tell me this can count as my exercise for today. If not, y'all are welcome to come over and laugh your heads off at my attempt to twist out some Tae Bo after shoveling!

When Dreams Come True

Okay so maybe there IS such a thing as a snow day in the real world. Who knew?

I woke up this morning and checked outside to see the snow condition. Not too bad. Cars were moving right along, I could still see pavement - you get the idea. But just to be sure, I turned on the radio to one of the stations listed on yesterday's "listen here for details" email at work. Nope - not listed. Just to be extra extra sure, I checked my answering machine after I got out of the shower. No calls. No big shocker there. Work would go on as it ALWAYS does.

I turned on the news and watched the weather lady step into the road and swish her toe around in about the inch of snow that was there. She was going on and on about the terrible road condition, and I sat on the bed saying, "Lady, I can see the pavement. It's an inch of snow. It's not bad!"

So I made my coffee, packed my peanut butter and jelly toast, warmed up the car and zipped right on over to work. Truthfully, this is the best the roads have been all winter. No getting stuck, no sliding, no fishtailing. I parked, walked up to the office, turned on all the lights, opened up the files, started up the computers, and waited for all the out of towners to show up. Then I saw the email. Campus closed.

Well isn't that just swell.

So I shut down the computers, locked up the office, picked up my coffee, and headed back to my car. I drove to the gas station for an iced tea and came right back home. The cats were very confused - no doubt I just ruined their day of "Mom's not home" fun.

And just so you'll know - I checked the website for my radio station - my work was not listed. So see, I did everything I was supposed to do and the cancellation notice just wasn't there. It doesn't matter though. I'm scrapping the day away, eating a little treat of frozen pizza (okay I baked it first) and some FABULOUS chocolate chip cookies I baked the other night during my Izzie-fest.

It would have been nice to stay in bed all day, per my #1 choice on yesterday's dreaming post. But it's a good thing I didn't since my doorbell rang - and that would have been embarrassing if I'd shown up with bedhead and droopy mascara.

Oh, and Phats - in honor of our conversation I watched Little House while I scrapped. And Faith - I watched Ellen, too! Now I'm going to go see what sorts of shows are aired while I'm at work in the afternoon, and I'm going to watch them because I can. :)

If I Only Had a Snow Day

I'm not sure five minutes passed in our office today without one of the guys checking up on the weather. They were plotting and planning what would happen if no one could get to work tomorrow. See, I think if I lived far enough away from my office that this could potentially happen to me, I'd get more excited about a day off work. But even if no one else in the entire office can show up, I can. So I did not share in their enthusiasm to watch the skies.

But what if? What if a flake actually fell (we have yet to see the first sign of snow) and enough followed in its snowsteps that work shut down and I got my first snow day since high school? What would I do?

1. Never leave bed. I put this first because I would never actually do it. The only time I've ever stayed in bed for an entire day was when I was deathly ill with the flu. Otherwise I sit around and think of five hundred things that need done around the house and I get up to do them. So I think it would be fun to forget the shower, the hair, the daytime clothes, the responsibilities of adulthood - and actually stay in the fleece sheets all day - watching all the TV that I never get to see because I'm at work.

2. Write all day. I do this sometimes, but not often. I like to hide when no one knows I'm going to be home for a day, and I'll just park in front of the computer and crank out dozens of pages. Sometimes only half are worth keeping - but it's great just to put all the thoughts on paper - or rather, on screen - and feel a sense of accomplishment!

3. Scrapbook all day. I used to be good about scrapping at home. Now it seems that I have to have a day planned with friends before I sit and scrap. But just in case the skies open up and lock me in tomorrow, I headed to Hobby Lobby tonight to cash in on the half price scrapbook album refill pages. It would be a pity to be unable to scrap for lack of pages.

4. Read. A book. A whole book. This is what I did all those growing up years during snow days. That was before I had cable and real responsibilities. A snow day meant reading fiction for hours. And right now I have shelves of fiction just waiting for me to make time to read.

5. Scour for recipes. The other night, just to keep the house warm, I started a baking frenzy that resembled Izzie's muffin marathons on Grey's Anatomy. I made fudge (two kinds) and cookies and brownies and candy. I had to keep washing bowls and spatulas by hand because I didn't have enough dishes to fill up the dishwasher yet but I was out of the staple tools. Now that the cooking is out of my system, it's time to find new recipes.

6. And then there's what I would really do. If, by some miracle, I actually got a snow day all to myself, I know what I'd do. Sleep in, get up, throw on warm up pants and a sweatshirt, go dig a path down the sidewalk and driveway, exercise, clean, cook a couple meals ahead, watch some Oprah, take a nap, blog, and talk on the phone. Such a creature of habit.

At any rate - snow must fall for any of the six to even be an option, so for now, I'll just wait for the first flake.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Last Sunday, Mom called to tell me she read the article I wrote. (This would be when my mind went completely blank…article? What article???) Well it turns out that something I wrote was up for publication that day. When I write for our denomination, I write 9-12 months in advance. When something is accepted, I receive a complimentary copy of my work in print, but it comes several weeks before it actually appears on its appointed day. Usually by then, I’ve completely forgotten.

So just for fun, I found a copy of it this week and read what I wrote. It’s always good to know what I said – just in case someone asks me about it. (Thankfully I looked – today someone stopped me about it, and at least I knew what she was talking about!)

The article was called If Only He Still Wrote on Walls, and began this way: “My college roommate and I used to comment that it would be so nice if God still wrote on walls. We probably were taking an Old Testament class at the time, studying the book of Daniel. In case you’re not familiar with the story, King Belshazzar threw a huge party – a political kind of thing. Everyone was drinking and many were worshiping idols at the same time. Right in the middle of their drinking, idol worshiping party, ‘the fingers of a human hand appeared and wrote on the plaster of the wall, near the lampstand in the royal palace. The king watched the hand as it wrote. His face turned pale and he was so frightened that his knees knocked together and his legs gave way.’ (Daniel 5:5-6)

“I really can’t blame King Belshazzar. While I’ve never hosted or attended a similar party, I do know that if I was minding my own business and a random hand appeared without a body attached and started writing on my wall, I might start to question a few things. I’d start with my sanity and work from there.”

The news was basically that the King was doing a lousy job in his reign and God was about to divide the kingdom and give it away to others. I said, “Perhaps if this is the only sort of news delivered through the writing on the wall method, I’m thankful that God hasn’t written on a wall for me. But still, Jenny and I thought life would be so much easier if God would just spell it out – in a language we spoke. We’d like Him to tell us if we were in the right major…where we should look for jobs…who we should marry. Then we could proceed without doubt.”

I’ve learned – as many people have – how to know when God is delivering a message to me. And lately it seems that God isn’t asking me whether or not I’ve heard Him. He knows good and well that I heard and that I knew it was Him. His question to me is now about whether or not I’m planning to acknowledge what He said. Whether or not I’m planning to treat it as the sacred Word of God from His heart to mine. Whether or not I intend to follow through with the path He’s written for my life – regardless of how impossible it seems some days.

One night this week I sat on my bed, reading my Bible and devotion book, writing in the never ending journals, and I said right out loud to God, “Okay, I need something very specific here. You’re going to have to be loud and obvious.” In other words – I needed Him to write on the wall.

The verse in my devotion book took me to Deuteronomy. I typically credit Deuteronomy with being one of the lesser highlighting-worthy books – but this week I think God’s pointed out three or four things from that book, so maybe He’s out to prove there’s treasures hidden all over! I read the verse, thought it was nice and started to close my Bible. But I felt nudged to read through the whole area surrounding that verse.

Here’s what I read (alongside what He threw into my heart thoughts as I read). “Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach.” Even though you insist on making it more difficult than it needs to be. “It is not up in heaven that you have to ask, ‘Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?’ Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, ‘Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so that we may obey it?’ No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it.” You know what I told you and still you fight Me on it and insist it’s too far-fetched. Too impossible. But what you need to know is already in your heart. And that is all you need at this moment.

“See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. For I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase and the Lord your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.” I told you what I want from you, and I haven’t changed My mind. If you do what you’re supposed to, these blessings are yours.

“But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess.” You know what your other gods are and if you follow them, then you’ll have a set of consequences of your own.

“This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.” You have a choice too – and I’m hoping you choose the right one. But it’s up to you. (The non-italics parts are from Deuteronomy 30:11-20).

So maybe He doesn’t scribble legibly on a wall. But He speaks clearly and truly wants a full and rich life for each of us. I guess the outcome of His wall-writing (through whatever method) is up to the decisions we make in response to His calling.

Hair Disaster Photos

Well of course they post in reverse order! :) Regarding the hair color disaster, here was the second attempt at fixing...the stage where I was Ronald McDonald's love child wannabe. My observation during this stage was that guys seemed to like it and women looked at me like I was a tramp.

This was the first color...the one that sent Marie running to Wal Mart for a new box of color to try. Clearly I was not amused. :)

Gray Gray Go Away

Despite argument from a couple of my younger friends (who seem to enjoy picking on me about my age) - I am not old.

But I am gray.

This gray business led to a rather unfortunate chain of events last May - some of you know about that. I was preparing for my class reunion and wanted to not be gray, so I dyed my hair what was supposed to be a lovely shade of auburn. It came out decidedly orange. I tried to fix it and ended up looking like Ronald McDonald's love child. Finally I had it professionally fixed and walked away with the lovely shade of auburn I intended to have the first time. The pictures of this chain of events are priceless, yet frightening.

I've been waiting for my coloring lady to let me know when she could work me in, because the grays were having a reunion of their own atop my head. Yesterday at lunch, I took one look in the mirror at home and decided it could wait no more.

So last night, for the first time since the great disaster of 2006, I box-dyed my hair again. Fortunately, this time it worked as it was supposed to. I'm not orange. I'm not red.

But you know what else? Also not gray.

Maybe if I get really brave, I'll post the orange and red pictures.

Charles Dickens Day

I told you I was going to try to do a better job at the holiday informing...and since I wasn't at work Sunday, I missed Create A Vacuum Day. I thought I better not miss another holiday in the same week!!!

Today is Charles Dickens Day. Wasn't sure exactly what that meant, so I did a little research - turns out today is his birthday. (Don't you know I'll be informing you of Bekah Day when it arrives, then!)

So for you Charles Dickens fans - today is a day of celebration. Have some cake and ice cream - and an extra helping for him, since I'm fairly sure that he can't have any.

IN my research, the particular site I was on said today was also Laura Ingalls Wilder's birthday. Phats is laughing already - I can tell. I know, I know, the Little House on the Prairie obsession has gone on too long. Really I'm not nearly as obsessed with it as I used to be. In fact, I never see it anymore. I think it's only aired when I'm at work. And I can't rattle off the titles like I used to be able to do. AND - you should be so proud - I still haven't purchased a season of it to own.

But anyway, you can celebrate Charles' birthday if you want. I'll have some cake for Laura.

And I'll report back next week for the next big holiday. Hint - that one is a major one, so let this be a reminder to those of you who have chocolate/flower purchasing obligations! You have one week!

My Attempt at Extra Effort

I may not own a jersey - although I do now have a Colts shirt! - but I can do my nails to support the team! I wanted to do horseshoes on all nails, but they're hard to draw - especially when I was using my left hand!

Here's a closeup. Hey - I never said I didn't have chubby fingers.

Super Bowl!!

I have received many skeptical comments about my participation in this year's Super Bowl. Don't get me wrong. I almost always go to a party. But that's mostly because I can talk, eat, and take pictures for my scrapbook. Why miss such an opportunity?

But this year, since the Colts participated, so did I. Mom bought me a shirt...my very first ever sports shirt! She called me from the store to see if I wanted long or short sleeves. Since I'm never cold, I told her short. And then it was -700 degrees that day, so I had to put long sleeves under it. Good grief.

The party I went to was a lot of fun - but the people weren't really sports fans! And I know NOTHING about football. So finally, at nearly halftime, I said to this one guy in the room, "Hey - are you a Colts fan?" He said he was, and I said, "Okay, well I'm going to need you to react just a little bit bigger so I know when to clap."

I think I became the personal project of two or three there. I didn't mean to actually learn about football. I just meant to get a clapping cue. But they tried to teach me about downs and yards and all that jazz.

But let it be known, I was the only one at the party that showed up in a team shirt....and of course, the nails to match!

Sunday, February 4, 2007

It’s been a while since I had a good cooking story. And it could be that after you read this, you’ll say, “It’s still been a while since you had a good cooking story.” But I would like to tell you the tale of the hummus.

I have some friends (a married couple) who have an annual movie marathon party at their house. They invite me every year, but so far, I’ve been unable to go. They asked early this time, and I wasn’t busy, so I put the party on my calendar. This year, the theme was Indiana Jones. They planned to watch all the movies…of which I’d seen none. They wanted to theme all the food around his travels. Well of course it’s too much to ask for Mr. Jones to have stayed in normal cities like Chicago or Los Angeles. No….he had to travel the world and stay in places that eat things while said things are still alive.

Allow me to first say that I’m a good cook. I mean, I don’t like to toot my own horn, and I certainly have had my share of culinary disasters, but I love to cook, and I’ve developed a decent amount of skill. But I took one look at the list of country options on the food list for the party and knew I was in big trouble. So I told my friends – why don’t you just tell me what I should make, since I don’t even know what people in these countries eat?

Hummus.

That was my assignment. It seemed vaguely familiar – as though I’d seen an episode of Rachael Ray when hummus was on the menu. That scared me. I watch Rachael Ray all the time – but more out of fascination of what she can do in thirty minutes than actual interest in making what she makes.

I hopped on the Food Network website and found a few hummus recipes. But they called for something called tahini. To me, that’s a bikini in Tahiti. WHAT IS TAHINI? I’VE NEVER HEARD OF IT! So I went to someone at work and asked her. Well she didn’t know either, but she informed me of someone else that I know who loves hummus. So I wrote to her. She not only told me about hummus, but she sent me a recipe – which called for the famous tahini. So I wrote back to ask about that. She explained it a little and I felt ready to make hummus.

Problem #1 – I own zero necessary ingredients. So, once payday hit, I went around town gathering ingredients. Extra Virgin Olive Oil (I learned all about EVOO from Rachael) - $3.99. 2 cans of garbanzo beans (ick!) - $.47 each. Lemon juice (my jar was about 6 years too old, so I bought new) - $.99. Water – well, as long as the pipes didn’t freeze, that, I had. Salt – check. 4 garlic cloves – no thank you. I’ll use the lovely powder I have in my spice rack. Pita bread to dip in it - $1.24. Carrots to dip in it - $69. Celery to dip in it - $.99. Tahini – DOES NOT EXIST IN MY COUNTY.

I tried Wal-Mart first. No luck. (Big shock.) So I headed to the local supermarket around 9 p.m. in search of tahini. As I walked out the door of my house, I also realized I’d loaded the garlic powder into my new (and fabulous) spice rack, so I no longer had the jar to tell me how much powder equaled a clove. So the first item of business at the supermarket was to ransack the spice aisle until I found a jar that would give me the measurement. With that located, I looked for tahini. No luck.

So I went to the checkout. Mind you, I was the only customer in the store at that hour. Two employees were chatting at the register, so I asked them if they’d heard of tahini. Blank stares. Yeah, I feel that pain. They were so sweet, though, and got out their own personal cell phones and started calling friends AT HOME to look it up online to find out more about it so they could see if they carried it in stock. Now that is service. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough. No tahini.

I gave up and went home, determined that the next day would be better. I got up early (we are now to party day) and drove across town to a bigger supermarket. Guess what? No tahini. So I went to the deli and said to the nice lady behind the counter, “Do you sell hummus?” She pointed to a little tub in the corner. THAT is hummus? It was so little! I thought I better buy two. ($5.98).

Determined to use at least ONE of the previously purchased ingredients, I went home and brushed EVOO on the pita bread and toasted the chips in the oven. There. That felt slightly homemade.

Party time came, and I dug the hummus tubs out of my overnight bag. I handed them to Chris and he said to me, “Hey, you cheated! This is a homemade food party.”

Need I explain the glare he received???

So…$14.82 later, I learned something about myself. I hate hummus. The pita bread wasn’t bad, but the hummus – ICK.

I think I’ll stick to spinach dip from now on. I’m much more familiar with things centered around sour cream.

Missin My Girl

Six years ago today, my phone rang at work. It was before the days of caller ID, so there was no way I could know that the voice on the other end would belong to my roommate. And there was absolutely no way I could have been prepared for her news.

She said to me, "Bekah, Carol died."

I wasn't sure what that meant. I asked.

"Baby Carol. She died this afternoon."

No - see, that just couldn't be. I just saw her a few days ago. The Super Bowl party. I sat in the living room and held her. She was fine. She screamed because I wasn't her Mom, but that wasn't unusual. And besides...today was her six month birthday. She couldn't be dead...it was a birthday of sorts.

Carol wasn't my daughter. She wasn't even my flesh and blood. But sitting through nineteen hours of labor with her parents and videotaping her entrance into the world made her mine in that special place of my heart...that place that "aunts" know about.

I wasn't ready to say goodbye to her when I'd only just said hello. I wasn't ready to give up Monday nights hanging out with her and her Mom while her Dad went to class. I wasn't ready to stop trying to get her to like me even though I wasn't her Mom.

But God had other plans for our baby girl. He needed her, evidently. I still don't understand why, but I've come to learn to just trust Him on those things.

Even so...I miss her. I play with her little sister and baby brother and wonder what life would be like with a six year old in the mix. I keep her picture up all over my house and office. I think of her often and miss her terribly.

Baby Carol...I haven't forgotten you. I miss you today and all days.

Not Dead Yet

Today is January 31st. This means I have officially - and may I add, successfully - completed my first month of the "covenants and commitments" I made for the new year.

It has been one weird month. Weird to want a snack and opt for a graham cracker over 3 chocolate chip cookies and a side of M&Ms. Weird to have leftovers for five days because I actually eat only one helping at each meal. Weird to have wheat toast in the morning instead of the traditional white bread. Weird to have only one floofy coffee drink a week instead of four - and for the one to be lowfat and sugar free. Weird to not call it a day until I've exercised and flossed. Weird to be adamant that some portion of my weekend be spent cleaning the house thoroughly.

But it's been one good month, too. Marie was right (ick!). Praying through the armor of God each day DOES impact my attitude in a good way. Reading - and actually studying my faith verse (and surrounding text) each night is teaching me much more than my marathon fly-through of the Bible in a year. It's nice to not have to suck in SO much to zip my jeans. (Still, God bless the person who invented stretch.) Granted the scales only show a lack of five pounds, but this working out thing - it is doing weird and wonderful things that I like. Makes it easier to stomach one serving at a meal and only a graham cracker for a snack.

There's more - but I've rattled on enough. Accountability has been good. It's much easier to remember to order a salad over fries when I know on Sunday I'm going to be asked what kind of choices I made. And it pushes me to actually pick up the phone and call someone when I know she's going to say "Did you make contacts with people as God prompted you to do it?"

What is it they say? Thirty days makes a habit? Well, I don't know I'm to habit stage yet, but at least it's not such a gargantuan effort.

And so far -the elliptical has not ACTUALLY killed me.

Holiday Alert!

Tomorrow is National Popcorn Day.

I'd feel terrible if people didn't get an opportunity to celebrate because I failed to inform them of the opportunity!!! Popcorn, caramel corn, toffee popcorn, kettle corn, chocolate covered popcorn, cheesy popcorn...is there a bad kind out there?

Perhaps the day was invented to allow people a reason to finish the stale crumbs of those massive triple combo tins they received at Christmas. You know what I mean. You're employed. It wouldn't be Christmas if our office didn't receive about three of those by the close of the food-giving season.

I'm going to try to stay on top of these holidays. I have a new calendar that reminds me of such important things...but I didn't get the calendar out until this week, so I've already missed Trivia Day (probably would haven't done so great anyway), Bean Day (what's the point?), Bubble Bath Day (rats!), Peculiar People Day (probably celebrate that one every day), Dress Up Your Feet Day (it was a Sunday, so chances are I caught that one by default), Penguin Awareness Day (I am aware of penguins), National Hugging Day (also a Sunday, so I'm sure I covered that one during greeting time in the morning service), Measure Your Feet Day (WHY? They're huge enough by sight alone), Opposite Day (still pondering this one), and Kazoo Day (thankfully). I'll try to do a better job in February.

But until then - Happy National Popcorn Day! Wonder if anyone gets the day off for this?

Sunday, January 28, 2007

The sermon was hardly into its second paragraph this morning before I was squirming in my pew. I knew before he even started preaching that something was meant for me today, because I was distracted all over the place – one of Satan’s favorite tactics for stealing my attention when there are words meant (if only in part) for me. And once I realized where the sermon was going, I knew why it was for me. Hence the squirming.

It really started last Monday. Before I’d even gotten out of bed to face the week, I was scribbling away in my journal an area of struggle that had intensified over the weekend. I desperately wanted to go one direction but was fairly certain God intended me to stay on course in the opposite direction. I opened my Joyce Meyer devotional book (Starting/Ending Your Day Right) and read these words of hers: Ask God to put into your spirit what He wants you to know. Ask Him to show you things to come and what you are supposed to do. He will give you direction, and you will have much to praise Him for today.

I tried that – but the struggle didn’t lessen any. So that night, when I sat down with Joyce, part 2, I got a real lecture: It is not your job to give God guidance, counsel, or direction. It is your job to listen to God and let Him tell you what is going on and what you are to do about it – leaving the rest to Him to work out according to His knowledge and will, not yours. God is God – and you are not. You need to recognize that truth and simply trust yourself to Him, because He is greater than you are in every way. You are created in His image, but He is still above and beyond you. His thoughts and ways are higher than yours. So listen to God…be obedient to Him, and He will teach you His ways.

Point taken.

Tuesday arrived and I went for my weekly lunch-hour visit at the prayer chapel. I didn’t hide from God the struggle that was still raging in me – there’s no point in that anyway. I remembered that years ago, when I was reading Elisabeth Elliot’s book Passion and Purity, there was a phrase that went like this: God gives us material for sacrifice. And there I sat, on the front pew of that chapel, staring at a very sturdy altar. God was nudging me, and I knew it. Get over there and offer this struggle as a sacrifice. So I “got” over there and started offering. Should have done it three days earlier!

Feeling that my faith-walk for the year would now be back on a fast track, since that was out of the way, I sailed into Wednesday with high hopes. That day, I was reading updates on Josh Buck (if you’ve not heard about Josh, you should go to www.greenhouseministries.org and read the whole story – and pray for him!). His friends added parts of his first spoken thoughts since his accident the week before. Among his first words: If you’re going to believe this faith, you can’t just believe in a little bit of it; you have got to believe the whole thing.

If a man my age, who is suddenly facing the possibility of permanent paralysis can say those words and mean them, then I have no excuse not to do the same. And God pointed to those words and informed me that I was trying to pick and choose my way through my faith.

God punctuated Josh’s one-sentence sermon by the words in my God Calling devotional: You pray for faith, and you are told to do so…Do not want to see the road ahead. Just go one step at a time. I very rarely grant the long vista to my disciples, especially in personal affairs, for one step at a time is the best way to cultivate faith. You are in uncharted waters. But the Lord of all seas is with you, the Controller of all storms is with you…It was when the disciples gave up effort after a night of fruitless fishing that I came, and the nets brake with the overabundance of supply.
I scratched out the parts of my prayer where I was asking for long term information and instead narrowed my focus to the step ahead.

Well, that brings me to last night, when Joyce Meyer’s devotional struck again: God wants to take care of you, and He can do a much better job of it if you will avoid a problem called independence, which is really self-care. The desire to take care of yourself is based on fear. You are afraid of what might happen if you entrust yourself totally to God and He doesn’t come through for you. The root problem of independence is you trust yourself more than you trust God. People love to have a backup plan. You may ask God to get involved in your life, but if He doesn’t respond as quickly as you’d like, you take control back into your own hands.

I’m the queen of the backup plan. In fact, the entire experience in the prayer chapel on Tuesday was the sacrifice of a backup plan. Plan A (a.k.a. God’ plan) seems to be standing still, so I was anxious to get to Plan B (appropriately – Bekah’s plan).

And so this morning, I sat in church, while Pastor Brian spoke about Samuel hearing the voice of the Lord – and how many calls it took for him to understand it was God speaking. And Pastor Brian asked us how many times God had called to us to follow Him. I didn’t want to tell him it was about 437 just this week. I just squirmed.

So even though Plan A doesn’t make any sense right now, I’ve learned that I’m not calling the shots, I’m not meant to see the long range plan, I better not have a backup plan, and if I do have one, I better sacrifice it immediately. What I can do is ask God to show me the next step and to live this faith to the fullest. Not just a little bit.

How to Spend $34

I enjoy spending money. I don't do much of it, but I enjoy it. Here are some of my favorite ways to spend $34.

* 34 Whopper Juniors at Burger King. Not all at once.

* 9 fluffy coffee drinks. Not all at once.

* 54 Polar Teas. (Replacing the Polar Pops.)

* 68 items of clothing at a really good yard sale. (A rare find that that many 50 cent items would be worth having.)

* 7 items at Fashion Bug. (Assuming I hit a good sale and have coupons.)

* 2 CD's at my local Christian bookstore (BIG gamble that the ones I want are actually in stock...another story for another day when I've calmed down.)

* 7 books on the sale table.

You get the idea.

Wanna hear how I actually spent $34 today?

It was the fastest departure of said amount that I've ever encountered in my pet-mothering years.

I took Kaegan to the vet. Last week I noticed that he'd ripped about a quarter size piece of fur off his belly and was scratching and licking his skin until it was red and raw. I warned him that if he didn't stop, he'd have to go to the vet. I thought that was threat enough.

See, I took him to the vet when he was three months old. He lost his claws. I took him to the vet when he was six months old. He lost his manhood. I took him to the vet about two months after that for a rather annoying projectile pooping issue. The receptionist failed to suggest that I also bring a sample (which would have been oh so easy, yet gross, to collect), so they had to do a kitty-colonoscopy to dig out a sample. He hated me for quite a while after that. I figured with said experiences behind him, he'd be receptive to straightening up on his own.

I was wrong.

Quite frankly, I was worried I wouldn't even be able to catch him and put him in the carrier to get him to the vet. He knows that little box can't lead to anything good. But despite my worries, I donned my thickest winter coat and gloves, held him tight and got him in the carrier. He literally howled all the way to the vet. I cried all the way to the vet.

Once inside they weighed him (in the carrier) and the vet and I waited while Mr. Kaegan worked up the nerve to exit the carrier. I held him down, and the vet pulled up one of Kaegan's hind legs, rubbed the raw spot, and said, "He probably just irritated it. I'll give you some salve." Those two sentences cost me $34. I forked out another $7 for the salve - which I can only hope gets remotely near the sore. So much easier to apply when there are two people to one cat.

This is why Alaska is NOT for me

Those of you who know me well know that I hate driving in the winter. My Dad, bless his heart, insisted upon chauffeuring me around in the winter when I was in high school and even college. He'd drive to campus and take me places. I never fought him very hard because I was so scared of snow and ice. But now I wish I'd have insisted a little more that I learn to drive on this stuff, because here I am now, a full grown adult, and I still hate snow and ice. And even more than my own disdain of driving on it...I'm always worried I'll wipe out someone ELSE with my own stupidity and lack of ability. So when it gets really bad, I stay home.

Sunday morning, I woke up about 5:30 - which is normally a good reason to just flop over in bed and go back to sleep for 2 more hours - but I remembered that we had a snow forecast, so I got up just to see if there was snow. No snow. WOO HOO!!!! I flopped back into bed and slept until about 8. Got up - SNOW. Everywhere. About four inches of it. Might as well be four feet, where I'm concerned.

I decided to at least start getting ready for church and see how things progressed. I was still in my jammies, with one half of my hair straightened and the other half sticking straight up in a clip (reminiscient of Boo in Monsters Inc.) when my doorbell rang. No one ever rings my doorbell - ESPECIALLY at 8:30 on a Sunday morning. It was my Dad. No, he had not come to take me to church. He was on HIS way to sing at an early church service and had stopped to use my phone to call Mom to warn her the roads hadn't been touched. As he left, he said to me, "They're bad, if you want to stay home."

Let me just say - when Dad gives permission to skip church - those must be some nasty old roads.

Even with his blessing, though, I could not feel good about missing church. I knew if it were a work day, the idea of skipping wouldn't even be considered. If I could make it to work, I could make it to church. Besides...I had to get out sometime to return movies - and if I could do that - I had better get to church. Turning in my tithe was more valuable than acquiring a late fee.

I'd just worked up my nerve to go when I heard a last chorus of a song from my Dad's radio program, which was playing downstairs..."But just think of stepping on shore and finding it Heaven." GREAT. Why did he have to play THAT one today?

Even so, I climbed in the car and began my own rousing rendition of Jesus, Take the Wheel - and I meant every word. I got as far as Wal Mart and said, "I can't do this. I just can't." So I pulled into Wal-Mart to turn around, but they hadn't cleared their lot yet. So I slid and bounced all around my turn-around attempt and as I sat by the road, waiting to pull out, I said, "Well if I can do that, I can drive on the road." So I got back on the path and drove like a 90 year old woman all the way to church. I prayed for green lights and no cars. I got most of my wishes.

But boy - what a meltdown when I got to church! I walked straight to the bathroom and started bawling. One of our pastors even told his wife to give me a hug because he thought I could use one.

THIS is why, despite the number of men living in Alaska, I cannot move there. If I uproot at all, it's going to have to be to the south.