Dream a Little Dream, Pray a Big Prayer

I'm an orderly sort of person; you know this. I like to make my way through calendar events with much precision and not jump ahead too much.

But this week, I found myself itching to think ahead to 2017. I think it's because with the exception of a couple of gift cards, our shopping has been done for a while, all the gifts are wrapped and waiting to be delivered, the cards have been mailed, and baking day isn't scheduled until later this week. I was sort of stuck in that middle place of getting to enjoy the beauty of the season while awaiting the official arrival of get-togethers.

So what's a girl to do, except plan for a year to come? So while the Christmas princesses searched for princes on the movie marathons on-screen, I sat down with my beloved {custom...did I mention I make it myself?} day planner and got busy on next year.

I made cover pages and meal planning pages, prayer request pages and Scripture writing plans. I arranged the weekly schedule pages for the month of January and started filling in {color-coded, of course} the plans we've already begun to make for a year we haven't begun to see.

It. Was. The. Happiest. Place. To. Be.

Planners and colored pens and dreams are among the finest ways to spend a day, I think.

I've also been reading a book on prayer this week, and the author keeps asking me what I'm too afraid to pray for. At first I scoffed. Too afraid to pray? HA! It's God! He's seen me at my absolute worst. I'm not afraid to pray for anything. The worst He can say is no. I know that. I've experienced that. Why in the world would I be afraid to pray for anything?

But in the interest of respect to the author who worked hard on her book, I paused to consider what I might be afraid to pray for.

Turns out, she has a point.

Turns out I'm not afraid to pray for anything when it comes to the needs of my day or the burdens of my friends and family. I'll ask for anything and everything for those I love.

But when it comes to putting prayers to these baby dreams that flutter in my heart? No thank you. I'll just keep them tiny and fluttering. Because to utter them is to risk losing them. Or to risk getting them. And sometimes I'm not sure which one is more scary.

Looking ahead to next year is more than filling in blanks of Ryan's work schedule or when we're hosting Tuesdays at the Table and who we might invite. Looking ahead to next year is daring to dream about the kind of ministry God might have for us and how that might change our lives. Looking ahead to next year is daring to admit out loud in even a whispered prayer, that I actually do have dreams for things I'd love to see happen, and waiting to see how {or if} they align with God's dreams for me, for us.

Looking ahead to next year means praying for the courage to try new things, risking what matters to the soul, and trusting God with the outcome.

A lot can happen in one year. I think I've seen that every single year for the last six years. Sometimes your December life looks nothing like your previous January life. {For better or worse, but when God is at work, somehow even the worse is used for better.}

So I know your next few days will be filled with madness of last minute rush, parties, exchanges, hurry, and more. But as the celebrations begin to dwindle and you reassemble your house and schedule to a bit of normalcy, dream a little dream. Dream of what could be if you'd dare to have the courage to allow it. And pray BIG prayers. Prayers unfettered by fear. See what God does with them.

And for Pete's sake, get yourself a planner. Or make one. And then get to filling it out. May it bring much joy to your soul as it does to mine.

Linking up with Tamar!

The Saturday Six

One.

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I realize that going on ONE cruise does not make me an expert, but I happened upon this article the other day and thought it had a lot of great advice! I was glad Ryan was a well-seasoned cruiser, because he knew all this stuff and made sure we did it on our trip, and it's true: things really did go smoothly because we followed these tips! So if you're thinking of cruising in the future, and you've never gone before, read this!

Two.

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This post is really a review of a journaling Bible {and a well-done review, at that}, but I'm sharing it because I adore her concept of creating a spiritual heritage Bible. If your kids are too young to journal on their own {or if their journals, like mine were at a young age, mostly contain the details of their latest crush's dreamy eyes}, this is a great way to help them keep a record of what they learned about the Lord, how their faith grew and was tested, and conversations you had together. Love this idea! 

Three.

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Every now and then I am invited to be part of a writing group along with other women, and that is always a joy for me. I'm pretty disciplined in my own writing, but there's something good for the soul about the accountability of writing for an audience outside my own and alongside a team of writers that push me to become better at what I do. Recently, I was invited to write an article on singleness for the Annesley blog, and it was published on their website this week. The ladies who write for this site are extremely talented, and I'm sort of a sweaty mess to be included alongside them. Here's the link to my article, but singleness was the topic of the month for September, so poke around and read very thought-provoking and wise articles by other single/formerly single ladies!

Four.

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I am sharing this article, because I'm guessing one or two of you out there might wrestle with this same conundrum. How do you work with/for people you consider to be friends, and find a way to be fair to everyone? How to you offer your talents and ask for compensation without looking mean? It's hard! I'm learning this as I do more work on my own, because my time does matter, and I want to be fair to myself and to Ryan to get paid for what I do, but at the same time, I feel like a big ogre charging my friends. If that's you {for any service!!} check this out.

Five.

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You guys know about glamping? I've read about it, but I think this takes the glamping cake. Have you seen THIS??!!?!? 
 

Six.

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Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you guys. I might as well just come right out and say it. I didn't like the book I asked to review this week.


{Insert all the gasping, crying emoji faces here.}

I was so excited about this book because it's a marriage book, and I love marriage books. I love learning from other perspectives and finding new ideas to implement to make the marriage I have {and love} even better. So when I signed up to read Your Marriage Masterpiece by Al Janssen, I hoped I would be chosen to get a copy. And I was. I sat down with pen and ruler in hand, ready to underline and learn.

And I didn't like it. I feel horrible about not liking it, but it remains the truth. I'm baffled, because the book was first released in 2001, was updated and re-released in 2008 and again this year. While it doesn't have many reviews online, all but one from all three releases are glowing. And the one guy who didn't like it isn't a Christian and was bothered by all the God-talk. So I have no idea why I could not bring myself to connect with and learn from this book, which has found its way to its third release, but I couldn't and I didn't.

The book bounces back and forth between telling biblical accounts with a bit of a fictional license and telling real-life stories intertwined with marital advice. I am not opposed to fictionalized Bible stories. I've even written a few. But these were a bit too fictionalized for me. His angle for these stories is that they are told from the perspective of a couple of angels watching from Heaven. It was just a bit too much for me, but if that angle doesn't bother you, his storytelling is good, so you might enjoy it.

There were a couple of fictionalized parts that were more of a modern-day retelling of Scriptural accounts, like Gomer and Hosea, and I don't mind that method of teaching either, but I was confused as to why the fictionalized parts weren't all consistent one way or the other. 

In the sections of real life stories, I just found myself lost most of the time. I don't know the people he's writing about, and that's okay, but sometimes I would be reading along, eager to see what happened next, and the story just ended. Sometimes he stopped a story for a while and then picked it up later, but by that point, I'd forgotten who the people were, and I had to go back to find it. Sometimes the stories didn't end well, which is fine, because when you're sharing real life, sometimes that's the outcome. But I didn't always find the application spelled out after the story. It felt like abrupt transition that led to new stories I hadn't expected.

I'm so sad. I wanted to love the book. I really did. I did make myself read the entire thing, and I do think there are good bits of advice peppered throughout. Unfortunately I was so frustrated by the chaos that I couldn't focus on them to draw from them.

As a writer, I'm so sad to leave this review, because I know if it were my book, I would want it to be loved more than this, but I also have to be honest, and for me, it just wasn't a win.

* Bethany House provided a copy of this book to me in exchange for an honest review. *

The Saturday Six

One.

I had the extreme privilege of photographing four births over the course of several years. All four babies were from the same family. The first couple were photographed on a disposable camera and were highly questionable in quality. The last two at least made it into the digital age, but I know I still missed many great photos and hadn't learned much about how to take artistic pictures. Still, I loved doing this and even though I'm not a professional, I would love the chance to do it again sometime. I loved this post about what to focus on during birth photography, and even if you're not into taking the pictures, it might help you decide what to look for if you're hunting for a photographer for a birth of your own!

Two.

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This is a fun article about how a book gets transformed into a Hallmark movie. Ryan and I had the chance to attend a red carpet premier of just such a movie a couple of years ago, and it was so much fun! And yes, I am absolutely watching this movie, based on Denise Hunter's novel The Convenient Groom when it comes out June 18th!! 

Three.

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I love it when Kelly Stamps does her link up home tours, and a new round just started this week! I always find great inspiration in looking at how other people decorate their homes! This week's tour was for living rooms, but she has other room tours coming up in the weeks ahead. If you like to peek into decorating styles, check out the link list here!  

Four.

I read this heartbreaking story this week about Big Daddy Weave's little brother. {If you're not a contemporary Christian music fan, Big Daddy Weave is an artist in that circle. I met him when I worked at the station - and he stands far out in my mind as one of the nicest and most genuine artists I ever met. And I met a lot of them.} Anyway, his younger brother Jason, is part of his band, and he is fighting scary and serious health battles, and that's worth praying about for sure, but what stopped me in my tracks in this article was the vulnerable struggle in Big Daddy's heart about genuinely singing the words of the songs while fighting the questions of the soul. And following that, the reminder that God is always at work in us, even when it seems like He's not.  

Five.

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Is it bad that this is on my "if I strike it independently rich" wish list?  


Six.

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My book of choice this week was Alexandra Kuykendall's newest release, Loving My Actual Life. I had heard of her before, but this was my first time to read her work, and I found her style to be very conversational. I point this out, because when having my own manuscript read by a test group, some mentioned that my style was very conversational and perhaps I should spruce that up a bit. Others found it very calming and relaxing. Because I enjoy that style of writing {obviously - since it is my style}, I enjoyed that about this book. But in case that kind of familiar, relaxed style bothers you, I wanted to let you know that's what you'd find in these pages.

Alexandra is a wife and mom of four, and spent almost ten years of her life working for MOPS International. Translation? She leads the same kind of busy life many of us do. And as a result, she faced the same kind of struggle we do, though I would venture to say too many of us don't want to fess up to the truth of it. We all spend way too much time loving the dream of the life we either wish we had or hope to have someday, and in the meantime, the life right in front of us seems drab and something to merely survive rather than embrace.

For nine months, Alexandra went on a quest to love her actual life...the life right in front of her. Each month, she focused on a different area of life: quiet, mornings, dates, health, adventure, home organization, creativity, meals, and passions, and she kept a journal of what she observed and learned during the nine month experiment. The book is born out of those journal entries.

It is not just a printed copy of her journal. It is polished and tells a good story. And it is quite honest about what worked and what didn't in each of the months. I appreciated her vulnerability and the lessons she passed along from the ups and downs of learning to love her actual life.

While the book wasn't crafted to be filled with sentence after sentence of quotable quotes, I did underline a lot of things, including some of these gems:

"It's not about having time; it's about making time with the right attitude." - page 67

"I realized when I'm trying to impress someone, I'm not loving them well." - page 103

"She could live in grief and love simultaneously. And that was better than grief alone." - page 146

"When we think of doing 'great things for God,' we think big. We think bestsellers and viral posts and sellout crowds. But that is the exact opposite of the gospel, of God, who chose to come as a newborn, who sat at the tables of ordinary people, sharing one dinner at a time." - page 198

I came away from the book reminded that even though I am not a mom, and I don't have the big career that she does, I am equally in danger of not loving my actual life. Equally in danger of ignoring all that is in front of me, in all its beauty, in favor of wanting more, bigger, different. If that's you, and you need a wake-up call from an understanding friend, check out this book!

Thanks, Baker, for sending a copy of this book my way in exchange for an honest review!

The Saturday Six

One.

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I happened upon this blog post through Twitter last week and loved it for many reasons, but I am going to have to follow this to see the updates on this blogger who just stepped with both feet into her dream of flipping houses! But even if house flipping isn't your gig, read this post to be reminded of how and why God cares about the dreams He places in our hearts. {The REAL reason I needed this post right now.}

Two.

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While my love with Ryan is still fresh and new, and while we haven't hit slumps and speedbumps that have derailed us, and while for the most part, I believe either of us would tell you we don't think our marriage is the hard work that it seems to be for some, I think this article speaks so much truth! The "for better or for worse" of marriage does mean that you'll see each other at your best and worst and sometimes be the cause of the appearance of the best and worst. And through all of that, you choose to keep investing in, loving on, and believing in each other. Beautiful words.

Three.

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Oh, my goodness, yes. While I am not a big lover of thrifting and antiquing, I have begun to see the value in finding new life for old things, for reclaiming when possible, and turning an old {and slightly falling apart} back door into a chalkboard and focal point. But Shannan's words stopped me when I realized I am terribly guilty at NOT giving people the same second chance. Conviction in a post, right here.  

Four.

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This season of our lives is all about dreaming. We've been dreaming up ways to make this house our own, dreaming up adventures for life here in our new town, and dreaming about what God might have for our future here, as a couple, and in pockets of ministry. Sometimes dreaming is daunting, because it's hard to imagine any of them might come true. And so...these words.  

Five.

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Ryan and I celebrated monthiversary #42 this week and just for fun, that evening, we answered the questions from this Not-So-Newlywed game. It was fun!! {And boy do I have a story for you about that! Coming soon!} 

Six.

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I've been working my way through my bookshelf this year to read books I already owned as a guide to my devotional time. Because of how the alphabet falls, that means this was my third consecutive Mark Batterson book! I finished All In, which is his follow up book to The Circle Maker {which was the first of the three I read, followed by Draw the Circle, his 40 day companion guide to the first book}.

I want to be quick to say that All In was not a bad book - at all - but it was my least favorite of the three. I think there were some stories in All In that I'd already read some version of in one of the other two books, maybe, and while it's perfectly fine for authors to reuse material like that, I think I was ready for something completely fresh. Maybe it was just too many months on one subject. I'm not sure.

The first two books were a guide to specific prayers about areas of life, and this book continued that practice, but it focused more on how our job as believers is to be all in for Jesus. He's not Lord of some, He's Lord of ALL areas of our lives. Or He should be. {And I agree with that wholeheartedly!}

As usual, he had many underline-worthy quotes, and I did put down the book nearly every day feeling convicted about the passion of my own fire in serving the Lord.

Here are some kickers for you:

"It's time to quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death." - page 14.

"God will go after anything you trust in more than Him until you put it on the altar." - page 44.

"Faithfulness is not holding the fort. It's storming the gates of hell and taking back enemy territory that belongs to God." - page 87.

"The blessings of God will complicate your life, but unlike sin, they will complicate your life in the way it should be complicated." page 101.

Many, many good things, and at this juncture of my life, as I am working my way into writing and speaking, it was good for me to spend some time being reminded of heroes of the faith {biblically speaking and throughout other parts of history as well} who only made the impact for Christ that they did because they went all in for Him.

So while I think The Circle Maker was my favorite of the three that I read, this was by no means a waste of my time. I did learn and I did come away challenged.

{By the way, this is not a new book either. It was published in 2013, and I believe I acquired it back when I worked at the station. I just hadn't read it until now!}

The Missing Half of the Dream

Well, Ryan and I have finally begun to attack the room of horror.

Its name is fitting.

The room will be our guest room, but for now, it's the space where all the boxes of stuff, namely stacks of paperwork, boxes of trinkets, and stacks of other things that we just haven't had the mental stamina to deal with have all been tossed.

Truth? If we've lived here for two months and haven't needed any of it, we probably don't actually need any of it. And much of it has gone right out the door in trash bags. Some of it has found a home. But none of it is allowed back over the threshold and into that room.

I pulled a pile of burlap from the top of a stack and underneath it, I found our bucket list. A literal blue wire bucket, from the dollar store, half-full of wooden clothespins and another dozen clothespins clipped to the edge.

Each clothespin bears a dream of ours. It's a project we did one evening back when we still were just dating, but dating enough to know we were headed for forever. We sat on the living room floor, the pile of empty clothespins between us, each of us clutching Sharpies and scribbling dreams. Big dreams, little dreams, silly dreams, serious dreams.

As time went by, the dreams started coming true, and we'd pluck the clothespin from the bucket, write the date on the opposite side, and clip it to the edge of the bucket.

Eat at Five Guys - 09.06.13
Horseback Riding -  06.15.13
Ride a Tandem Bike - 12.06.12
Drive-In Movie - 07.06.13
Build a Snowman - 01.05.14
 
Quickly, the edge filled, and we swapped. Completed dreams went inside and waiting dreams went on the edge.

Go Ice Skating
Stand in the Pacific Ocean
Visit New York City
Skip Rocks

I found the bucket in the room of horror, and to my horror, one clothespin lay in half on the floor, spring missing and matching side nowhere to be found.

I grabbed it and it was empty. Plain wood staring up at me.

It had been on the edge, which meant it was a dream yet to fulfill, and yet the side with the dream written on it was gone. All I held was the missing half of the dream.

Ryan found me, kneeling on the floor, holding the broken clothespin in one hand and our bucket in the other. I am sure my look was much more forlorn than it needed to be as I held up the half of the pin.

"It's gone. This dream is missing," I told him flatly. "And when did we last dream up new adventures? It's been too long."

He shook his head. "This HOUSE is a huge dream come true. We're living in one of the biggest dreams we've had."

I knew he was right. I also knew that when you move as much stuff as we moved and the worst that has happened has been the loss of half a clothespin, you really do not have room to complain. But it wasn't the missing piece of wood that got me in the gut. It was the missing dream.

We've had other dreams go missing. Not tangibly like this, but in a literal kind of way. Dreams we've had for our lives that God has not chosen to fulfill at this time. Some have been a no, and some have been a wait. But the loss of them, whether temporarily or permanently still hurts.

As we cleaned the room of horror, I also found the pack of blank clothespins. The space for us to sit down, dream fresh dreams, and clip them to our bucket. The chance to dream has not left us just because one dream went missing.

So we will dream. And we will mark more of them off the list. We'll have our adventures and think of new ones.

And who knows? Maybe somewhere along the way, we'll re-dream the one we lost and get to see it come to pass!

It's Not What We Thought

I loved reading your stories yesterday! Thanks for telling me more about what you dreamed of being back when you were a kid and how that does or does not look like your life today.

I found it rather amusing that several of you are doing the one thing you either swore you wouldn't or couldn't imagine doing back in the day. Funny how life works that way sometimes, isn't it?

One of my dreams, back in high school, was to marry a pastor. This dream was partially driven by my crush-of-the-month, who actually was a pastor, and for me to adequately dream about our life together, obviously I had to be ready to be the proper pastor's wife.

Back then, pastors' wives were supposed to be proficient on the piano, rock at children's ministry and hospitality, and keep an immaculate house to be able to host meetings for ladies at the drop of a hat. Well, I was an eleven-years-of-lessons piano flunkie, but I rather hoped the potential congregations considering my imaginary husband would overlook my lack of talent in that department and appreciate all I could do in other realms.

My senior year of high school, one of our English class assignments involved writing an essay about what we would do with our lives if we were guaranteed we wouldn't fail. My essay was about how I would be a pastor's wife. The best. pastor's. wife. ever.

I still have that essay somewhere, and with a little effort and my trusty binder, I could actually tell you which box it's packed in. But I don't need to look at it to remember this: my teacher gave me an A and scribbled a little note at the bottom that perhaps I should just consider ministry myself.

I remember laughing when I read that. I wasn't minister material. Ridiculous.

But you know what? I think she saw a little something in me I couldn't see in myself. Obviously I've not grown up to be a minister, but I have grown up to do ministry. In dozens of little ways, I've gone on to plant seeds through teaching, through radio, through writing. Things I never imagined myself doing. {And if you'd thrown the speaking part in there, I can guarantee you SHE never would have imagined it either.}

Funny, isn't it, how God ends up using us in ways we never imagined, and in some cases, ways we vowed NOT to be used.

When He's in charge, anything goes. Pretty grand, isn't it?

What Did You Want To Be?

Yesterday I sat myself down on the couch and told myself I could not get up until I had made some serious headway on the presentation I'm delivering at the women's conference in April. I've worked on it several times, but it struggled to be born. {Writers, you know, often compare the delivery of words to birth.} I hadn't reached freak-out level yet, as I still have a few weeks before I have to actually present it, but I really wanted it done in advance so I could learn it well before that day.

Apparently I listened to my own time-out because by the time I finally took a shower about 3 in the afternoon, the bulk of the presentation was written.

Much tweaking remains to be done, but here's a happy dance for having it on paper in some form.

ANYWAY. Since I won't know the women I'm speaking to this round, I crafted a bit of a get-to-know-you session, and that took me on a little trip down memory lane regarding my early life goals. And that, of course, led to me just getting curious about your early life goals!

My first career choice {as told to me by my mother...I don't actually remember this} was to be a zookeeper.

{Yeah. This is as close as I get now. And this took some mental convincing.}

Stop laughing. Actually, don't stop laughing. It's laughable. I love animals as in cats and dogs. DOMESTICATED cats and dogs. Lions? Tigers? Anything that moves quickly or makes a loud noise or could be remotely considered dangerous? Scared. Out. Of. My. Ever. Loving. Mind.

What on earth made me think I wanted to be a zookeeper? Mom said that in my explanation to her, I said it was because I didn't want to go to college, and apparently in my kindergarten minds, zookeepers didn't have to go to college. I did actually go to college {NOT to be a zookeeper}, but I won't lie: I wasn't crazy about going. So apparently some things never change.

The first thing I remember wanting to be was a singer. Specifically Sandi Patty.

I had all her cassettes {EEK!} and memorized her VHS tapes {eek again!} and wanted to sing just like her. I learned every song, her part AND the background vocals and I sang in my room right into the tip of my curling iron. This was my favorite song. 

Little hiccup to that plan. Can't sing. Some dreams just dies.

But guess who did show up in three separate locations on three separate days of our first anniversary trip?

So once I let the singing/world tour dreams go, I decided I wanted to be a nurse.

Little problem. I don't do fluids, germs, or emergencies. And then of course, we're back to the prolonged education thing.

I did, however, participate in a photo shoot at IWU once in which I wore scrubs for ads for their nursing program. Of course I can't find any of those photos right now, so you'll have to settle for the floor display of my business look. But being a nurse on a billboard was the beginning and end of my medical career:

And then...my final career choice was to be a teacher. My parents both worked in education, so it was just sort of a natural flow, I suppose. And truthfully, had the whole education system not started to derail when it did, I believe I might have actually followed that career path. {Funny, isn't it, for someone who dreaded college?} But I watched my parents as the system began to change and decided it was not the place for me.


I do still love to teach and have done it in other capacities {Bible studies, speaking, this blog, etc.}, but it never became my career.

Know what never made it on my "when I grow up" wannabe list? 

Financial Aid...

...and...

radio. :)



Funny how God's plans are TOTALLY different than ours, isn't it??



So now you have to tell me: what did YOU want to do when you grew up? And did you?

The Shafferland Shuffle

* I already mentioned it somewhat, but last Sunday we took a true day of rest at home - especially to try to allow Ryan to get better from this sinus infection that we discovered he's been fighting for a full three months. He's just worn out and needed a day on Mo. I scrapbooked, he rested, we watched our church service online, and that night, we recorded our podcast, with the help of a furry friend we know.

* Monday, Ryan must still not have been done resting because he ended up taking a nap before he ever went to work! {Been there, done that!!!} That night we went out on an impromptu coffee/house dreaming date, where Ryan decided to try out tubs in Lowe's. Crack. Me. Up.

* March came in on Tuesday with the most GORGEOUS sunrise! I loved it!! But it was short-lived, as the rest of the day was rainy and cold, and even a little big snowy! I had the opportunity, that afternoon, to help a friend's mom paint a wall in her living room. She's trying to list her house and had run out of time to get the painting done, so I donned my paint clothes and dug in; thoroughly enjoyed that!

* We celebrated 39 months of marriage on Wednesday, and Ryan brought me a GORGEOUS bouquet of flowers as part of that celebration. We also went out for a coffee date that night - at a little coffee shop in town that we had a gift card to - and they do fancy pants latte art! Sweet! This was also the day I  noticed the first signs of spring in our yard. YAY!!!!!!!!!

* Thursday....oh Thursday. It was the day I'd been kind of dreading for a while. For months now, Ryan has been preparing to work on staff at a retreat, and this was the weekend. Thursday was when we had to say goodbye, and it was BRUTAL. He had the whole day off work, and after we got all his stuff settled into his room, we got to spend part of the day together, just relaxing at a coffee shop and looking at the lake. And then, well, I guess the best way to say it is that I cried until I almost gave myself a migraine level headache. Such. A. Sap.

* I'd made plans to keep myself VERY busy on Friday, which included a little day trip to see friends, lunch, coffee, dinner, much laughter, much talking, much joy to my heart. Though I still missed Ryan TERRIBLY, I was glad I'd made myself so busy so I didn't sit around and wallow. And I was grateful for a good weather day to do my traveling. Before the day was out, I did get about a two minute phone call from Ryan, and it was so good to hear his voice!!

* Yesterday was my last day without Ryan, and it was a busy - and full - day! Lots of chores, including baking 7 dozen chocolate chip cookies to deliver to his retreat for him to share with the men. He sent me a couple of pictures throughout the day, which along with the notes he hid for me at home, got me through the day. Last night I got all dressed up and went to help with one of the retreat events, which meant I could see him - kind of - from a distance, so I wanted to look cute! Excited for how great his weekend has been and excited to have him BACK HOME.

Blanks, Scribbles, and Sparkles

I'm staring at a blinking cursor on a white screen, wondering how to best welcome a new year: a year as blank and mysterious as this screen. It's the same kind of staring I will do later today when I stare at the blank page of my journal and will myself to remember to change the last two numbers of the date from 15 to 16 without scribbling out the wrong one to replace it with the right one. Of course the pressure of remembering to give that level of perfection to my journal will probably automatically mean I'll mess it up and scribbling will commence.

I love first days. It's odd to me that I do, because I'm the girl who loves a plan and isn't wild about mystery. But despite that, I love first days. I love thinking ahead to what might be.

This year I have pages of scribbles, and not the kind of scribbles induced by writing the wrong year on a journal page. Intentional scribbles. Scribbles of dreams and hopes and goals. Scribbles of what I hope Ryan and I can accomplish together in our marriage, in our home, in new avenues of ministry. Scribbles for myself - of writing, of making new connections, of fostering friendships I have even now. Scribbles that will hopefully catapult me into making mere ideas come to fruition and scribbles that may never become more than a scrawl on a page. And both are okay.

And over there, just across the room, a sparkle catches my eye. My mantel decorations for the new year are a silver and gold jungle of sparkles. Why is it that we commemorate a new year with all things sparkly? Glitter hats, shiny noisemakers, shimmering disco balls. This is how we choose to bring in the new. And there sits our rendering of a new year - a burlap S sitting in the middle of wild bling. Ordinary tucked into celebration.

This is a new year. The mystery of the blanks, the hope of the scribbles, and the celebration of the sparkles.

Let's do this year. Let's fill it with prayer - not just God bless prayers on the fly, but paused, deep, scary-faith prayers. Let's schedule adventure and happen upon even more that we didn't know to schedule. Let's treasure friendships and capture their beauty because none of us knows how long we'll have each other. Let's celebrate milestones because each is an accomplishment that some never get to know. Let's welcome people into our homes and our lives and let them know they're loved and chosen and treasured. Let's invest - in each other and in ourselves.

2016: welcome. We would love for you to be kind and gracious to us, but mostly we just ask you to be eternally purposeful. Bring your mystery, your hope and your celebration. We'll bring the blanks, the scribbles, and the sparkles.

The Shafferland Shuffle

* Last Sunday morning we woke up on Mo to this view of Braeya curled up on the ottoman by the tree. So cute! I felt TERRIBLE when I woke up but powered through, got ready, and made it exactly five minutes at church before coming right back home to go to bed. I slept for three hours while Ryan went to a training lunch for small group leaders. I wrote the leader's manual, so they shouted out to him in my absence. I felt much better as the day went on, and we rested the entire day! {At dinner that night, Ryan turned his back on his plate for a minute and Braeya ate his bread and butter so he had to start over!}

* Monday, one of Ryan's patients gave him a "rhinos rule" gift - which I thought was a fabulous idea. His patients are the best! And many bring in treats, making it fun for him to try to be good with his eating. {It would be impossible for me!!} But you know what was possible for me? Visiting with my parents at Wendy's that afternoon and ONLY drinking an unsweetened tea. No burgers. No fries. No nuggets. No Coke. Something of a miracle.

* I spent some time scrapbooking on Tuesday - I'm trying to get caught up so I don't end the year SO behind. I did my nails {part one - added glitter polish later} and that night we got to just sit and REST, which was heavenly. I noticed Braeya has started sleeping in some of our workout poses. {She actually comes in to watch us work out every day. HA!}

* Wednesday morning I had the chance to visit one of my friend's kiddo's Christmas program at school. Always entertaining! Braeya decided that afternoon that she felt QUITE left out of our monogram-under-the-tree setup since she didn't have one, so she dumped her toy pig right into the mix. And look what we watched for fun that night! ELF!!!! Ryan loves that movie. {I like it but he lovvvvvvvvves it.}

* Thursday morning I spent most of the morning working on goals for 2016 - creative, fun, and yet exhausting work. And I'm not done yet! I made a different veggie blend for dinner and decided I hated it. No beans should be the color of about half what you see in this picture. So that's off the list. And then that night, we watched Four Christmases - because we discovered we do not own Christmas Vacation like we thought we did!

* Friday we got the tiniest flurry of snow - hardly enough to photograph, but I tried, since it's probably all we'll see before Christmas anyway! {And I am not complaining about that!} I did a photo shoot for a friend that afternoon and then we had date night on Friday night. It was a wonderful night out that included a stop at Starbucks. Starbucks and sparkly nails! :)

 * Yesterday was one HEAVENLY day at home for both of us. We got to sleep in and have breakfast together and then Ryan launched into what turned INTO a full day's project to mount the TV to the wall. Nothing ever goes smoothly in Shafferland when it comes to projects, does it? Braeya and I hung out and had fun while he worked, and we pitched in now and then with some assistance of our own. {And when I say "we" - I do NOT mean Braeya, of course.}