Learning Generosity

The Bible study I attend has a challenge for us each week. (You might remember the first one, because it excited me so. The one where I got to sleep in until my little eyes just popped open?)

This past week's challenge focused on generosity. Gulp.

I struggle with that sometimes. Okay. A lot of times. Ryan is one of the most generous people I've ever met, but I'm a bit more on the cautious side. When it comes to being generous with money, I think my hesitation stems from the years I lived from paycheck to paycheck. Who am I kidding? It was more like penny to penny.

Those were the years when I'd read advice about saving pocket change, and I wanted to shout, "What if you use your pocket change to pay bills?" Those were the years when my gas budget was so tight, I got to choose ONE out of town trip a month. (Out of town, by the way, was limited to about 50 miles, round-trip.) Those were the years when I never would have made it, had it not been for a roommate helping to shoulder the load. It wasn't that I didn't care about others. It was just that I had to be crazy frugal to keep my bills paid.

So it's good for me to be married to a guy with a giving heart, because he helps me see that I'm living in the now, not the used-to-be. While we're far from independently wealthy, he's helped me see that we can share what we do have.

But the place God really tugged on my heart this week was all about my time. Ryan and I make no secret of the fact that we try hard to protect our time together. Sure, we're still in honeymoon phase (yes, almost six years later) but it's more than that. We genuinely desire to make each other a priority so we can continue to foster a healthy relationship.

But in the generosity challenge, I found myself convicted to be generous with my own time this week. To put aside some of the things I really wanted to do (maybe even needed to do) to make time for others. And I also needed to be generous with Ryan's time. To allow him the freedom to do the things he felt called to do, even if those things didn't involve spending some of our normal together-time...together.

So I'm learning, slowly, about the generosity of time. It's a balance, I'm sure, to find the time we need together as a couple and the time we need to share with others. Because after all, our time together is still important. This relationship we have needs cultivated, protected, and prioritized. But sometimes others need us. And when those sometimes roll around, we have to be willing to look outward and be generous with our time.

The generosity lesson. Maybe it's time, maybe it's money, maybe it's something else entirely for you. Maybe it comes easily. Maybe it's the hardest thing. But we've been given much - of something - haven't we? And of that, much is required.

So I'll be over here, just learning more about how to be generous with what I have. With what we have. It's a good challenge, even if it's not as easy as sleeping in. ;)