50 Months and a "B" Themed Date!

Yesterday we celebrated 50 months of marriage. Nice, clean numbers like 50 make me want to go back to the beach. And while yesterday was stunning by ANY Indiana winter standard...it wasn't the beach.

The sad part of yesterday was that we had to spend way too much of the day apart. Ryan had work, of course, and I had to go back to the dentist!

You guys!! I got the best report I have ever had since all this dentist-y stuff started! She said I'm almost completely healed up, I had great hygiene (THANK YOU, THIEVES!!) and my x-rays showed no decay. Three cheers for that!

After the dentist visit, I drove over to the station to see my friends and ended up staying TWO HOURS. It was so good to see them! On the way home, I stopped in the old stomping grounds of Marion to go to a viewing. {That was my second viewing in two days. I fear I'm becoming my parents.} Then, when I was almost home, Ryan called and said one of his friends needed to borrow our car for the evening, so I met up with them to drop off the car. Ryan and I went to ANOTHER viewing {yes, this makes THREE in two days} and then we could start our date.

I'm pretty sure when I wore my pretty dress 50 months ago, I didn't envision this milestone with a day apart, a dental bib and two funeral homes!

We tried to take our monthiversary photo and Braeya kept moving around and distracting us, so we had to trash the whole first set of attempts...except this one. This kind of summed up the day well.

But we got a keeper, too:

Now. For the B date!

If you missed it last week, I wrote about my decision to do a series of alphabetical dates throughout the year. Ideally we'll do these every other week, but I thought the monthiversary would be a nice day to sneak in a low-key alphabetical date. This one wasn't nearly as involved as the "A" date.

First up? BBQ DINNER.

I gave Ryan a choice from two BBQ restaurants in town. We'd been to one before, but not the other. He decided on the one we knew and loved, so we went there and had our food in just a jiffy!

We got a platter dinner to split and brought it home so we could eat it while we rested, because it has been a very busy week. {It was DELICIOUS.}

Then the next part of our low key home-date was BORROWED BOARD GAMES. We don't really own any, so I borrowed Sorry! from one of his work friends and we got busy playing.

At the end of round one...it was close!

I'm red. He's blue. He won.

Because of course.

He also won rounds two and three.

He tried to look genuinely sorry as he slid the pawns into home. I told him the game was representative of my love life before I met him. SO CLOSE - and then someone else won the guys. SORRY! lol!!!!!

Even though I lost all the rounds, and the day was crazy chaotic, the date was fun! Proof that they don't have to be crazy convoluted to be fun. BBQ and board games at home = much fun!

Happy monthiversary, Ryan! The last 50 months have been the best! :) I love life with you. Not sorry one little bit!

What I Learned in May

Before I share with you what I learned in the merry, merry month of May, it is podcast Tuesday, so here's our fun for this week! My thoughts on watching {from the comfort of my own home} my first Indy 500, and the health screening lady's obsession with how LEAN Ryan is...there are plenty of giggles in this half hour!

Click here to listen

And now...on to what I learned this month! And to see what others have been learning, you can check out the links on Emily Freeman's blog!

1. Goodbyes teach you more than you can put in one paragraph. Or post. Or book, maybe.

Saying goodbye to our house in Marion was beautiful and bitter all at once. I cried from sorrow and giddiness, sometimes at the same time. I pondered and questioned. I celebrated and savored. I packed in final memories and wondered if I'd done enough. It was exhausting on levels I didn't even know I had. And along the way, the Lord whispered that it was all okay. I'd gathered what I needed to have in order to foster beautiful memories. And there really would come a day when I could think about it all.

2. Old pictures are mysterious and delightful. 

I'm the Bekah-razzi. We all know this. But you know, there were the olden days, when people actually did not photograph every given moment of their lives. The photos from that day are mysterious because they make me wonder what it was about this moment that warranted a photo. And it makes me hungry to see more, but more doesn't exist. I'm grateful to live in the era I do - where photos are plentiful. This photo? That's my mom - on the back step of the house we just sold. It looks very different now. But how cool is that? 

3. Being a full time writer and reader hinders 10,000 steps a day.

My sisters and I all got Fitbits so we can be accountable to each other and have a new way to stay connected even though we are separated by many hundreds of miles. I'm learning that when you write and travel and speak and read for your every day, it's hard to achieve a daily step goal of 10,000 steps. It works on days I can go for runs, but if the weather doesn't cooperate, I have to do some serious house-pacing to reach my goal! {I have tried pacing while reading but to walk fast enough to register on the Fitbit, I sometimes get dizzy while I read!} And the truth of it is, if the writing bug hits, I can sit for eight or more hours without missing a beat! First world problems, right?

4. Washers really can eat socks.

I've never lost a sock in my entire life until we moved to this house. I've heard stories of people who lose socks in the laundry and it's always baffled me how that happens. And then in a month and a half, I lost three socks. Two of mine {not from the same pair} and one of Ryan's. I looked EVERYWHERE and they were just gone. Vanished. Then Ryan decided to clean out the washer, because he thought it smelled mildewy, and what did he find tucked safely behind the rubber seal to the door? All three socks. So apparently our washer {which came with this house} actually eat socks. And also...I'm not crazy.

5. Healing can be a slow process.

If you're kind of new to the blog, you don't know that two years ago this coming August, I had a five hour oral procedure to treat a pretty advanced case of periodontal disease I didn't know I had. They told me when I was diagnosed that recovery would take about two years. WHAT?!? Years!?!?!? Earlier this month, I went for another checkup {I have to go every three months} and they gave me a glowing progress report but added that I have not fully healed yet. I still have some places that need to continue recovering. I really thought they were giving me an exaggerated recovery time, but I guess not!  

6. I love golden-doodles.

We had the privilege of dog-sitting for some friends of ours for a whole week. Little Phoebe came to stay with us, and while Braeya was not really a fan of our willingness to adopt a dog for a week, I learned that I adore golden-doodles. Pheobe was well-mannered, so much fun, and the perfect size for our house. I know we aren't meant to have a dog right now, but I do believe the day will come, and when it does, I want a Phoebe-junior.

7. I can cook with yeast.

My mom is a masterful cook/baker/candy-maker. And because she is, I've always resisted making the things she makes so well. Her pies...amazing. So I've never made pies as a general rule {the one day post-surgery when I spent an entire day making ONE pie as an exception...} because I know they won't be as good as hers, no matter what I do. Same with her delectable Christmas chocolates...and her yeast rolls. Truth? Yeast scares me. I think I'm most paralyzed by the over-the-top lecture in home ec class about NOT KILLING THE YEAST. Don't make the water too hot or you'll KILL THE YEAST! {Perhaps repurchasing yeast nearly broke the home ec budget?} But this month, I decided I was not going to let a 38-year-fear of yeast get the best of me, and I drove right over to the store and bought a three-pack. And last week I spent an entire evening making strawberry sweet rolls for Ryan. They aren't a masterpiece, but let the record show, I did not kill the yeast. And they were a bit on the delicious side. :)

8. There is a fireworks tax {at least in Indiana.}

Ryan and I purchased sparklers at the store this weekend, because I wanted to add some sizzle to our Memorial Day date-for-two. When I inspected the receipt after our shopping spree {because we're weird like that}, I discovered there is an additional tax charged on fireworks. I had no idea! Is that an Indiana thing or an everywhere thing? I do not know. But I learned it happens here!

 
 

The Shafferland Shuffle

* Last Sunday morning it was freezing when we woke up. No. Like LITERALLY freezing. And that is how we came to have a potted plant surviving in our bathroom. IN MAY. We went to a lunch at our church - a lunch provided for some of the different teams of people who serve. Got to sit with some friends we didn't know very well so we could get to know them better! And before we went home, we drove by a building they're demolishing on campus. We've watched a lot of construction in the past few years, but not much demo!

* Monday I found a fun surprise in the yard: a rose bud on a bush!! I love finding surprises left behind! I made a new recipe for Ryan, called smothered chicken, and it was most delicious! {And healthy!} And he wasted no time putting together the new bookshelves we got at IKEA on my birthday. They look SHARP! He picked them out and it was a good choice.

* Tuesday was a very cold and rainy day, so it was the most perfect time to curl up with a novel and read, read, read! I loved that! It was also a good day for warm lunches and catching up on TV shows with Ryan while drinking extra hot coffee. I guess there is something lovely after all in a cold and rainy day!

* Wednesday was a blissfully ordinary day - but I did get to have lunch with one of my friends who was in town for the day! And that night I worked on sorting the very LAST of the stuff we hadn't sorted, while Ryan began assembling the bed for our guest room! {It's best if I steer clear of assembly.} 

* Thursday was my next dental follow-up, and I got the best report I've had so far since surgery! We're coming up on two years since I had the procedure done, and they say I'm not cured yet, but I'm making great progress! And after the appointment, I got to have one of my favorite lunches with one of my station friends, and then I got to see my station friends! That night...a stunning sunset on my run!

 * Friday evening, we took some rummage things to a sale Ryan's mom and sister were having, and when we got home, we embarked on our next adventure: dog sitting! Yes again! Not the Great Dane this time, but a little Golden Doodle that is adorable and NOT loved by our cat. LOL! Poor Braeya Jo. She's trying so hard to be brave and make friends, but she is still quite scared.

* Yesterday morning, I had a DVR'd movie watching date with my friend Kari, and before we did that, we went to check out the Farmer's Market in town. It was much fun - and I got Ryan a giant cinnamon roll as a treat, since he couldn't join us! We spent the rest of the day continuing to bond with our little charge, and I think we exhausted her!

The Shafferland Shuffle

* Last Sunday was the kind of leisurely we like. Coffee date in the cafe at church, really convicting service, two hour nap, much scrapbooking and reading and football. I am so grateful God thought to stick a day of rest in each week and I'm so grateful we've become accustomed to taking it as such.

* Monday began my last week in the second round of my clean eating/exercise, and I added one more workout to each day just to shock my body. {It is certainly shocked.} So while I worked out and tried to cook veggie-loaded meals, Ryan was turning the Bekah-mobile over to 200,000. Big day for us!

* I spent much of Tuesday preparing for our small group meeting - trying to get everything pulled together and organized. When Ryan came home, he was carrying a big box full of stuff, so I asked if he still had a job. {He does.} Ryan's doing some speaking in a few weeks, so he spent much of Tuesday night hiding in the office working on his talk. It's odd to check on HIM while HE writes. Isn't it usually the other way around in this household?

 * Wednesday was a pretty snow day here in Indiana {not the kind of snow day most of you are dealing with out east right now}. I went down to campus to take pictures in the snow, which was so pretty! {Had to get to it before the students played in it!} That night we held our small group meeting, and Braeya considered leading it - until people showed up and she freaked out and hid.

* Thursday, I trekked to Fort Wayne for my next follow-up dentist appointment. I was thankful for blue skies and clear roads for my trip! I had to run some errands when I came home, and I was so excited to see PLANTS and FERTILIZER and HOSES out in the store. Spring is coming!!! By the time I got settled in at home again, Braeya had missed me and only wanted to snuggle up and make sure I didn't leave again!

* I've been reading a book about faith in my devos this month, and of course Friday seemed to be test day! I had a rough heart day as I wrestled through some stuff with God: thankful for the freedom to have time to do that and for big boxes of tissues and cups of coffee! When Ryan came home {with a pork loin that he had strapped into the car like a child} we rested and then had date night: Starbucks and grocery shopping! We are THE coolest. 

* Yesterday Ryan went to a ministry meeting, so while he was gone, I did chores and read about half a book. :) And I got presents in the mail, which made for a pretty wonderful day. I'll take presents over bills any day of the week. Last night, we went to visit some different friends who have been sick/recovering from surgery, and then we went to Subway for dinner. Ran into Ryan's brother, so we talked to him for a while. A full day, but a good day!

A Little Give and Take

Yesterday I trekked to Fort Wayne to visit the dentist. Again. :) I have roughly six more months left in my two year dental rehab program, and I'm hoping hoping hoping they'll be able to declare me well by then!

{If you're new here, back in August of 2014, I had a five hour periodontal surgery, and I've had to go to the dentist every three months since then for checkups. I had an advancing periodontal disease, and through the surgery, they were able to get me on the road to recovery!}

I was so grateful for a good day to travel for my checkup yesterday, especially after some snow and ice on the roads in the last couple of weeks. I packed up the car with coffee and snacks and extra coats and hats, and then I called my mom to chat while I drove.

Just like the commuting days of old.

Before I went to the dentist, I stopped by the station to say hi. I didn't get to see everyone, but it was fun to get some hugs and swap stories and see my friends. They asked how I'm doing, what I'm up to, and they were kind to tell me they missed me.

And I miss them too. It's strange to transition from being in a place full of people and their stories to being home with a cat whose constant story is "CAN YOU WATCH ME EAT?" It's strange to give up up hearing the joys and struggles of a work crew that felt more like family. It's strange to miss out on the celebrations of their lives and only read about them from afar.

But as I told Mom during our talk yesterday, I am confident that I'm in the right place for this season. For as much as I miss what I left behind, I adore what I see before me. I love being able to do meaningful work throughout the day that relieves the stress of Ryan's evenings and weekends. I love being able to write and read books. I love so many other opportunities that we've been able to enjoy because of this change in seasons.

God is opening up even more doors, and even though many of them are not open wide enough yet for me to see through them to the other side, I'm excited for the prospect of what I might find when I step through.

I'm thankful for the courage to be able to offer what I had in exchange for what He has for me. It's worth it, you know...the give and take. The offering of a sacrifice and the blessing He offers in return.

The Shafferland Shuffle

Pausing at the start of today's shuffle to wish my Dad a very happy birthday! :)

* Last Sunday was our 3rd engagementversary...and we started the celebration by helping to serve coffee at the little cafe in our church. It was our first time to help with that and we really enjoyed it! That afternoon, we went for a walk in the park and Ryan taught me to play frisbee; I was terrible, but I got better! And we rounded out the day with frappes and coffee, because our addiction holds fast!. :)

* Monday I helped serve a funeral dinner at our church, and while the circumstance prevents me from saying I enjoyed it, I did enjoy being able to help in a time of need. It was such a beautiful day, and I surprised Ryan with a lemon cake when he got home from work, and we enjoyed our dinner out in the pirogi. It's sad, really, how little time we spent out there this summer. :( And Ryan mowed. It had been something like a month since he had to mow. I guess that made up for the start of the summer when he did it about twice a week!

* Tuesday was my big bad dentist day, so I spent the morning distracting myself with writing projects, and then after I survived the filling, I rewarded myself with a shopping trip to Hobby Lobby, where I bought the fancy pants metal monogram for my Pinterest project. Ryan let me take it easy that  night, as I had a decent amount of jaw pain, and he even made popcorn for us while we watched TV - to be chewed on the opposite side of my mouth, of course.

* Wednesday I found a praying mantis on our window! How fun is that! It's the little things that bring a smile. :) I enjoyed my time with Bible study ladies, and am learning so much. It's nice to be a participant! Ryan and I went for our last training run, pre-race, and we both had a good last hurrah.

* I had a special treat on Thursday - my friend Amy came to spend the day with me! She had a day off work and decided to hang out with me! We went to Kokomo and I took her out to lunch, we visited Ryan, we went out for cupcake treats, and she even surprised me with a box of Rise n Rolls! We had a great time! And Ryan's mom came over that night to take our pictures for our Christmas cards. We miss long evenings filled with light! We had to hurry, but we got it done and had fun.

* Friday I hunkered DOWN and did writing projects all day. It's the first time in a long time that I have absolutely exhausted myself from writing. {Yes, it really can happen.} My one break in the day was watching the Little House on the Prairie reunion on TV that I stumbled upon at lunch time. Ohhhhh how I loved that Albert Ingalls. Anyway. After a long day of work, I was so glad that Ryan had plans to bring home ribs for dinner. They are so good. There's a church that makes them for a fundraiser, and he loves them so much, he always gets some!

* Yesterday was RACE DAY!!!! We ran our 5K and I'll give you the full scoop later, but let's just say we had a great race. Ryan KILLED THE THING and I didn't get killed BY the thing, so it was good all the way around. It was fun to be back in our hometown, see friends, and enjoy {yes, I said enjoy!} the run. And a bonus - my mom came to cheer us on! I was glad she came. :)

Because it's High Time You Had a Dental Drama to Read...

A couple of weeks ago, I had my one year checkup at the dentist. One year since my dental surgery, and they told me I am continuing to progress well. Not fully healed yet, but on the right track and getting better with every appointment. {That was my fourth checkup since surgery.}

But at that appointment, the dentist told me I had an old filling beginning to break down and it needed to be replaced pretty quickly. {As in...they knew I would try to delay it until my next 3 month appointment and that was going to be too long.}

They actually did a couple of fillings for me during my surgery lat year, but I was asleep for those, so it's been a long time since I participated in full consciousness for a filling.

And...um....it was a disaster. The time before the sedated fillings, I mean. I had a panic attack and they had to actually stop the appointment and have me come back another time. And I had issues with my jaw locking shut {and then open} when they gave me Novocaine. A disaster from top to bottom.

So you can see why I was a bit nervous.

I've heard people say that when you have a baby, you sort of stop caring about your dignity and embarrassment becomes nonexistent. Well, I don't know about having babies, but I have reached the place of my dental-patient-career where I no longer have any dignity, and embarrassment is just a way of life.

Yesterday was the appointed filling day. I kept myself busy all morning, I called a couple of people for prayer support, and I skipped lunch out of sheer nervousness. {WHOA. I mean WHOA.} I strapped on the trusty old "Fear Not" bracelet, doused myself in Stress Away essential oil and headed to the dentist. They took me to a back room {thank you, Jesus for privacy!!} and I said to the assistant, "Have they warned you about me? Is my picture on a cabinet in the back room somewhere?"

I told her all about my panic tendencies, my previous experiences with a locking jaw, my TMJ, and probably a whole lot more she wished I would have kept to myself.

They tilted the chair back, and Fixer Upper played on the TV above my head. I needed the support of close personal friends in my hour of need, and Chip and JoJo were the closest I could find. Apparently it wasn't quite enough, because you guys, I cried all the way through the Novocaine. WHO DOES THAT!?!!? Apparently needles are different now than they were the last time I was awake for this sort of adventure, and the one they used was so big, it messed with my gag reflex and scared me to death. I felt honest-to-goodness tears rolling INTO MY EARS, and that was the end of whatever shred of dignity I had left.

I'm sure that poor dentist was thinking "WHY did I respond to the alarm this morning. WHY??"

They left me alone for the numbing to take effect, and I texted Ryan, saying "I don't think I can do this. I mean really. I DO NOT think I can do this." He told me I could. I decided not to test the waters by seeing what might happen if I came home without the completed procedure. But I'd be lying if I said that didn't cross my mind.

The assistant asked if she could do anything to make me more comfortable. I said, "Let me go home??" She laughed. I kind of hadn't been kidding.

When the dentist came in to remove the old filling and prepare for the new, I gripped the chair with both hands and mentally chanted "Jesus" because I figured it would hamper the work at hand for me to actually say it out loud, but I know there's power in the name of Jesus,  and I needed a good dose of it right then. What I'd been told should only take 3-4 minutes took closer to ten, and I only had to ask them to stop twice so I could do some Lamaze breathing and work my way through the panic.

The sweet assistant kept telling me I was doing a really good job, and she spoke to me in the voice people use on toddlers in potty training, but I remained unoffended. At that moment, my entire body was shaking so violently from fear that I could see the tools on the tray attached to my chair bouncing like they were in an earthquake. Finally, I dared to ask, "Are things really okay or you just telling me they are to be nice to me?" Evidently the cavity was deep and treacherous, but we made it through the drilling. The dentist tapped my shoulder and said "You did a great job." Liar. But I'll take it.

With that, the only thing left to finish was the filling itself. I finally got control of the ridiculous shaking and the assistant worked quickly to finish her work. When she got to her last round of sealing, I felt my jaw begin to lock up and panic set in completely. She felt my jaw trembling and said urgently, "TWENTY SECONDS!! GIVE ME TWENTY SECONDS!!" Those were the longest twenty seconds of my life, but we got through them with no locking.

By that point I was sweating, I don't even WANT to know what my blood pressure was, and my jaw was so sore.

But. I. Did. It.

Next time I won't be so quick to be a hero. There is no shame in being 37 and knocked out for a filling, I've decided.

And just what, exactly, is an appropriate token of gratitude to send to a staff who had to deal with the likes of a 37 year old toddler?  Ideas? Suggestions?

The Shafferland Shuffle

I fear the Shaffers have been shuffled! What a week! Thankfully much less happened in the world of things breaking down, but much more happened in the land of busyness!

* Last Sunday  morning, our church handed out little study books to go along with the sermon series, and I was excited because I got to help write them! I was grateful to be included and it was exciting to see the finished product in print! That afternoon I had a massive cookie baking party: dozens of chocolate chip cookies to keep us fueled throughout the week. And that night? We took a walk through campus and got to see from a distance the candlelight service all 16 athletic teams had together to dedicate their seasons to the Lord.

* Monday, since our office was still all torn up, I worked from the floor of the living room: an unusual, but kind of fun vantage point! That night I spiced up our lives by dropping my keys down our garbage disposal, and then after Ryan saved the day by fishing them out, he continued his work on our ceiling - and I think he looks pretty handsome here. Don't you??

* Tuesday morning, I met my friend Kathy for coffee, and we caught up from many months of not being able to talk more than a "hey!" at church. Loved that! Ryan sent me this picture from work. He and his co-worker, Chanteal, won the work cornhole tournament last spring and now there's an official board for the tournament progression! Pretty cool! That night, as some of you may already know, our beautiful new coffee pot just up and died. It was fine on Monday...dead on Tuesday. So...Starbucks to the rescue!!

* Wednesday morning I found this one sitting on my purchases. I guess she likes to shop too! I took a field trip to Fort Wayne that day...stopped by the station to see all my friends {took me an hour and a half to get through to see everyone} and then I had a dentist appointment. Good and bad news there, but we can talk about that another time. Ryan painted our ceiling that night...so close to being done with that project!!

* Thursday, I left home when Ryan did so I could spend the day in Greentown prepping for our sale. I actually had to wait on his step-dad to arrive with a key, so I hung out in my car reading a novel and trying not to creep out the neighbors. :) All day long I sorted and stacked and organized and took pictures and made signs - WHEW! {It was actually almost 10 pm by the time we got home from getting everything ready!!} I also stopped by a friend's house to pick up a catalog...doesn't she have a gorgeous porch view?

* Friday was the first day of our sale, and it was crazy busy. The town sale was technically just Saturday, but we did a Friday and a Saturday, and I'm so glad we did. I have so many tales for you - just wait! Our moms came to help, and they were life-savers. We appreciated them! We had a GREAT first day - sold a BUNCH of stuff and got to see old friends we'd not seen in years. {Benefits of returning to your hometown.} But were we ever pooped and burned to a crisp by the end of the day!

 * We wrapped up our sale on Saturday, and though it was a LONG two days of very hard work, it was also a great result, and we were thankful. Our moms were back for more fun, and we had a few down times when we were able to laugh and tell stories and just enjoy the day. Though the entire weekend had been forecast as great weather, we did have a few sprinkles on Saturday - but nothing a little time under an umbrella couldn't fix!! When the day was done, we cleaned up the leftovers and came home to collapse from our very tired, angry feet!