What I Learned in May

Before I share with you what I learned in the merry, merry month of May, it is podcast Tuesday, so here's our fun for this week! My thoughts on watching {from the comfort of my own home} my first Indy 500, and the health screening lady's obsession with how LEAN Ryan is...there are plenty of giggles in this half hour!

Click here to listen

And now...on to what I learned this month! And to see what others have been learning, you can check out the links on Emily Freeman's blog!

1. Goodbyes teach you more than you can put in one paragraph. Or post. Or book, maybe.

Saying goodbye to our house in Marion was beautiful and bitter all at once. I cried from sorrow and giddiness, sometimes at the same time. I pondered and questioned. I celebrated and savored. I packed in final memories and wondered if I'd done enough. It was exhausting on levels I didn't even know I had. And along the way, the Lord whispered that it was all okay. I'd gathered what I needed to have in order to foster beautiful memories. And there really would come a day when I could think about it all.

2. Old pictures are mysterious and delightful. 

I'm the Bekah-razzi. We all know this. But you know, there were the olden days, when people actually did not photograph every given moment of their lives. The photos from that day are mysterious because they make me wonder what it was about this moment that warranted a photo. And it makes me hungry to see more, but more doesn't exist. I'm grateful to live in the era I do - where photos are plentiful. This photo? That's my mom - on the back step of the house we just sold. It looks very different now. But how cool is that? 

3. Being a full time writer and reader hinders 10,000 steps a day.

My sisters and I all got Fitbits so we can be accountable to each other and have a new way to stay connected even though we are separated by many hundreds of miles. I'm learning that when you write and travel and speak and read for your every day, it's hard to achieve a daily step goal of 10,000 steps. It works on days I can go for runs, but if the weather doesn't cooperate, I have to do some serious house-pacing to reach my goal! {I have tried pacing while reading but to walk fast enough to register on the Fitbit, I sometimes get dizzy while I read!} And the truth of it is, if the writing bug hits, I can sit for eight or more hours without missing a beat! First world problems, right?

4. Washers really can eat socks.

I've never lost a sock in my entire life until we moved to this house. I've heard stories of people who lose socks in the laundry and it's always baffled me how that happens. And then in a month and a half, I lost three socks. Two of mine {not from the same pair} and one of Ryan's. I looked EVERYWHERE and they were just gone. Vanished. Then Ryan decided to clean out the washer, because he thought it smelled mildewy, and what did he find tucked safely behind the rubber seal to the door? All three socks. So apparently our washer {which came with this house} actually eat socks. And also...I'm not crazy.

5. Healing can be a slow process.

If you're kind of new to the blog, you don't know that two years ago this coming August, I had a five hour oral procedure to treat a pretty advanced case of periodontal disease I didn't know I had. They told me when I was diagnosed that recovery would take about two years. WHAT?!? Years!?!?!? Earlier this month, I went for another checkup {I have to go every three months} and they gave me a glowing progress report but added that I have not fully healed yet. I still have some places that need to continue recovering. I really thought they were giving me an exaggerated recovery time, but I guess not!  

6. I love golden-doodles.

We had the privilege of dog-sitting for some friends of ours for a whole week. Little Phoebe came to stay with us, and while Braeya was not really a fan of our willingness to adopt a dog for a week, I learned that I adore golden-doodles. Pheobe was well-mannered, so much fun, and the perfect size for our house. I know we aren't meant to have a dog right now, but I do believe the day will come, and when it does, I want a Phoebe-junior.

7. I can cook with yeast.

My mom is a masterful cook/baker/candy-maker. And because she is, I've always resisted making the things she makes so well. Her pies...amazing. So I've never made pies as a general rule {the one day post-surgery when I spent an entire day making ONE pie as an exception...} because I know they won't be as good as hers, no matter what I do. Same with her delectable Christmas chocolates...and her yeast rolls. Truth? Yeast scares me. I think I'm most paralyzed by the over-the-top lecture in home ec class about NOT KILLING THE YEAST. Don't make the water too hot or you'll KILL THE YEAST! {Perhaps repurchasing yeast nearly broke the home ec budget?} But this month, I decided I was not going to let a 38-year-fear of yeast get the best of me, and I drove right over to the store and bought a three-pack. And last week I spent an entire evening making strawberry sweet rolls for Ryan. They aren't a masterpiece, but let the record show, I did not kill the yeast. And they were a bit on the delicious side. :)

8. There is a fireworks tax {at least in Indiana.}

Ryan and I purchased sparklers at the store this weekend, because I wanted to add some sizzle to our Memorial Day date-for-two. When I inspected the receipt after our shopping spree {because we're weird like that}, I discovered there is an additional tax charged on fireworks. I had no idea! Is that an Indiana thing or an everywhere thing? I do not know. But I learned it happens here!

 
 

Our AirStone Wall

Many months ago, I shared with you about our first ever DIY project, which was the Giani kit that transformed our 80's peachy leafy kitchen counter top into something that looked a bit more this-century and granite. It was a weekend project that took relatively little time and really enhanced the look of the galley kitchen in our first house. It was still holding up great three years later when we moved out, and I would 100% recommend it to anyone looking for a kitchen overhaul!

So our huge DIY project at our new house was the stone wall. And today I thought I'd tell you about the good, the bad, and the ugly of that in case you're interested in trying it in your house!

It all started with this pin from Pinterest, which I found months {maybe even years} ago when we were merely dreaming of a new home that might have some sort of open concept transition from kitchen to living room. I tucked it away, and when Ryan and I were dreaming specifically of the changes to make in this house, I casually showed it to him. He was on board with it in about eighteen seconds and started researching companies that made stone to use in such a manner.

If you didn't know this {and I most certainly did not}, you have to be very careful if you use real stone on a wall like this because it is {obviously} heavy and can actually pull down a wall if it's not done properly. Plus, stone is just expensive. And you know expensive is not our love language.

So Ryan found a company called AirStone and did some research, read some reviews, and declared this was the company for us. This product can be used inside or out {though we can only vouch for its inside use} and is 75% lighter than true stone. It really does look like stone and feels that way to the touch - until you pick it up and feel how light it is. You also do not use any kind of mortar or grout that has to be mixed. There's an adhesive that you put on the back {like buttering bread} and that is what keeps it in place. And if you need to cut a stone, you can do it with a hacksaw, so you don't even need any special fancy power tools.

There are two color ensembles to chose from: Autumn Mountain, which is a brown tone, and Spring Creek, which is a blue/gray tone. We used Spring Creek in our house. They sell flat stones, which are the ones that you put on a regular wall surface...natural edge stones, which we used on the end of the wall that did not meet up to another wall...and corner edge stones, which we did not use, but you would use that if you were wrapping around a corner onto another wall you planned to cover with stones. And we used the bucket of putty they sell.

Now, I will say, the online calculator failed us. {And if I had been the one doing the calculating, I would absolutely claim user error because we all know my math skills. But Ryan did it and he's both good at that stuff and accustomed to that stuff, so I'm pretty sure it wasn't his fault.} The calculator recommended two boxes of the flat stone to cover the living room side of our wall, and we needed somewhere between six and seven boxes. {We ordered eight total when it was all done, but that was after we also decided to also do the backsplash in the kitchen.} So I'll just throw that out there for what it's worth. Obviously it did end up being a more expensive project than we planned, given we budgeted for two boxes and had to buy eight {and a second bucket of adhesive}, but we still feel the end result was worth the extra funds, because this is our favorite part of our house.

I absolutely giggle at the cute girl in her white mini skirt and perfect pedicure in the installation videos, because our experience at this process was nowhere near as neat and tidy as this. We had a whole lotta dust, a whole lotta stone fragments hanging around, and a whole lotta adhesive mess, but again, worth it in the end. I would NOT recommend wearing a white mini skirt for installation, however.

Each box of stone comes with multiple sizes and color tints of stones, and Ryan learned, after he got his groove down, that it was good to work two rows at a time and alternate the sizes and colors of each stone. {Some stones, as you can see in the picture, are long and some are short. Some are narrow and some are thick. Some are light and some are dark. You want to puzzle it together so you have a good variety of thicknesses, lengths, and color tone.}

We painted the wall the Autumn Fog color we used in the kitchen, since it coordinated with the stone, and that way if there would happen to be any paint showing through between any stones {which I don't think ended up being the case} it would at least blend in. Ryan "buttered" the stone with the adhesive, which worked really well. It stays soft for about 30 minutes, so if you need to pull a stone down and reposition it, you can. And we haven't had any issues with falling stone since it was installed, so I would say it holds well! Ryan did have to pull a few stones off after the adhesive had "cured" so we could install the counter top, and they did pop off without breaking, but the removal damaged the drywall on the way off. That was totally fine, since we put them right back on after the counter top was in, but I wanted to let you know that if you do this and undo it someday, you'll have some wall repair in front of you. Also - the adhesive has a pretty strong smell, and that's saying something from the girl who wishes Sharpie made a candle. I didn't get a headache or anything, but you'll probably want some good ventilation or a fan going if you're sensitive to smell.

Ryan is a perfectionist, so every stone had to be tested with the level, and now and then - especially when he got started with the bottom row - he had to use shims to hold things in place until the putty hardened. This part of the process slowed us down quite a bit, but I know the end result was worth it, because we didn't get to the top to find the entire thing was not level.

One HUGE frustration he had was that one of the two boxes of edge pieces we purchased was not level. Like every single stone had to be filed down to make them level. That was probably the biggest holdup of the project. I would say that's probably not typical since only one box was that way, and thankfully it was just the edge pieces, which meant a much smaller box. But it did happen and it did cause a slow down, frustration, and a few cuts on his hands!

The stones were easy to cut, but they did leave a dusty mess. Definitely put down towels or tarp if you're going to do this inside!

In the end, I would estimate Ryan put about sixty hours into this wall. But we do love it, we think it makes an incredible statement, and we both feel it was a good investment!

The Shafferland/Phoebe Shuffle

This has been an unusual week here in Shafferland, because we were still dog-sitting all week. So please prepare for canine overload!

* Last Sunday was a beautiful day of rest for us, but it was also a beautiful day, and that afternoon, we got to take Miss Phoebe for a walk through the neighborhood. She was so good - didn't chase the ducks or bark at other dogs or anything! I made a healthy French toast deliciousness for dinner that night that I won't lie - was really good! :)

* Monday, I hung out at home with Phoebe while Ryan went to work, and I learned she loves to be held like a baby! A 26 pound baby! LOL! She is such a cuddler. We took walks and played games and rested in between adventures. And Ryan is so good with her; he actually got carpet burns on his knees playing with her that night!

* Tuesday evening, we went to the viewing for Ryan's co-worker that passed away unexpectedly a few days ago. {The "Fun Meter" button he's wearing is something all his co-workers got in honor of the man who died. He wore one to work every day.} We were there probably two hours, and that's about the max time we could be gone from Miss Phoebe, so we came home and made it up to her by taking her on a long walk, where we got to see a spectacular sunset!

* By Wednesday, I had to get some writing done, so I dragged Phoebe's bed into the office and she took a long nap while I wrote. We discovered the rose bush outside the house had exploded into bloom, which gave me nice scenery while Pheebs fertilized the yard! And by that afternoon, she even entertained herself for a few minutes while I fixed dinner! Self-soothing! :)

* Thursday, Phoebe and I went to the hospital to watch Ryan play cornhole, and then back to writing we went! That evening, I decided the time had come to conquer my fear of working with yeast and I made strawberry sweet rolls from scratch. Ryan was very excited!

* Ryan's work had a cookout on Friday {for Memorial Day} so we went to visit him during the cookout, and Phoebe ate up all the extra attention. Since it was the weekend, we went on a quick date that night, which included coffee and shopping! YAY! And we tried to watch some of our DVR'd shows that night, but alas, I am pretty sure the new coffee we bought {not on date night - but the kind we brew at home} hates me and I was SO SICK. It was awful. Ryan said he'd never seen me like that!

* Yesterday I felt better than I did on Friday night, but I was just wiped OUT from being sick, so I mostly rested on the couch all day. Did some scrapbooking. Let Phoebe and Ryan take care of me. We did venture forth that afternoon to pick up a shelf for our guest room that we found while shopping Friday night. It is PERFECT!!! And then we enjoyed our last few hours with the Pheebster before her people came to get her. I was kind of hoping they'd want to leave her. They didn't.  Sigh.

The Saturday Six

One.

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I love a good home tour. I love KariAnne's blog. So the two combined = perfection. And also - how much do I love the little sign saying the year the house was built!?!?! YES!!!!!

Two. 

Ummmmm Ryan? You're going to want to watch this video. Emily A. Clark made an outdoor kitchen space using her grill, a side cart, and pavers. Shut. The. Front. Door.

Three.

This was a fun article with some behind-the-scenes facts about life at IKEA. If you like shopping there, you should check this out! 

Four.

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Oh. My. Word. Look at this writer's retreat! I confess I don't have access to a view that would would appropriately suit it, but my word.

Five.

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I have talked about Grace and Lace on the blog before, but I have to mention them again! I first learned about this adorable shop when I worked at WBCL and found them on an Etsy hunt one day. We interviewed them and I remember Melissa, the owner/founder as one of the most delightful women we ever talked to! She went on to be on Shark Tank {saw that too! Loved it!} and has been quite successful with her company. Because I so love her story and her kind spirit, I would just recommend shopping the whole shop. But LOOK AT THESE ADORABLE BABY LEG WARMERS! Oh my word! I had to point them out today because I've never seen anything quite like them and I just can't handle the cuteness. 

Six.

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Last fall, I read the book Murder at the Courthouse by A.H. Gabhart. I adored the book and its cross between a Mayberry-esque setting with delightful characters, and a page-turning murder mystery. I was thrilled that the end of that story promised a book two, so when I saw that Murder Comes by Mail had been released, I had to read it!

I happily revisited the tiny burg of Hidden Springs and quickly reacquainted myself with the characters I had come to love in book one. I discovered Deputy Michael Keane was still living alone in his log cabin by the lake, but all hope was not lost that one day, he might just have a relationship with spunky Alexandria {Alex} who filled so many pages of the first book. And as the book opened, Deputy Keane was praying that the rickety and sputtering church bus full of nib-nose ladies on their way to a play in the city would keep sputtering until he safely arrived with the lot of them.

The trip is interrupted when Deputy Keane spots a jumper on the bridge and stops to intervene. He succeeds in saving the man's life, but the man quickly tells Michael that he should have just let him jump. Michael shrugs it off and tries to push away all the "local hero" attention that follows, {newspaper headlines, TV reporters hunting him down, stacks of phone messages congratulating him} but no one expects the string of brutal murders that follow and all somehow seem tied to this mysterious jumper - and Michael. Mysterious letters begin arriving in Hidden Springs, declaring Michael is the reason these women are dead, and each new day brings dread that more bodies and letters will be discovered.

When big city shrinks and cops start showing up in Hidden Springs, poking around and poking fun, Michael's frustration escalates. He realizes he is the common bond in these murders, and he has no way of knowing who from his life will be the next target.

As in the first book, the small town element is absolutely delightful. Predictable habits, quirky neighbors, nosy know-it-alls, and all you would imagine from a tiny bumpkin burg. But also as in the first book, the crime element is not hokey. It's {again} not make-you-jump-while-you-read scary, but it does keep you captivated and makes you try to solve the puzzle in your head.

I just love this little series and my biggest letdown in book two is that nosey Willadean Dearmon from book one did not make an appearance. She was one of my favorites! But despite her absence, I loved this book and am excited to know there is a book three on the way!

Thanks, Revell, for sending this book my way in exchange for an honest review!

Bekah and the Business/Casual/Dress Pants

It's been a while since I shared a capsule wardrobe post, but the concept continues, alive and well, in my life. In fact, after we moved, one of my friends came over to see our house, and when I showed her our big walk-in closet, she said, "Do you HAVE clothes? Because all I see are Ryan's!" I showed her the little corner with my stash and realized it's working! Having just a few things really, really works for me. Of course with all the painting and moving and organizing, I feel like all I've worn for the last two months are workout clothes, but still...

Also - if you're thinking about capsule wardrobes, and you're not sure yet if you like the idea, here's the link to my Pinterest board about them, which has the posts I've pinned to gain my own inspiration, as well as other posts I have written about my own adventures. 

Today I want to tell you about the three pairs of business/casual/dress pants I own that work splendidly for me in concept and yet this part of the capsule needs HELP in actuality.

When I worked at the college, I had to wear business casual clothes every single day. Then I went to the radio station, where business casual was required only if we had a meeting or some sort of reason to dress up. The rest of the time? Jeans. And now that I work from home? Yoga pants!!!!!! Just kidding. {Kind of.} I do try to get up, get ready, and wear real clothes as many days as I can, because I feel more productive in real clothes. But I confess the winter months {followed by the moving weeks} stretched my desire to leave the yoga pants!

I tell you all of that not because you care about the dress code at all my work places, but because dress code drives a wardrobe - even a capsule wardrobe. When I worked in the business casual environment, MOST of my clothes were dressy, and I owned just a couple pairs of jeans. Then when I went to the station, I flipped that: I stocked up on jeans and let go of my dress pants when they wore out or stopped fitting.

So now, I've decided that three pairs of business/casual/dress pants are all I need to get through this season of my life. Pants that are dressy enough for meetings, church, speaking engagements, dressier dates, any of that. But I don't need a ton of them, because my every-day life is extremely casual now.

I will also tell you that this section of my wardrobe needs some serious work. But this is a keepin'-it-real blog, so I will share what I have.

One.

These black pants may be the most embarrassing article of clothing I own. Let me tell you the story behind them. I bought them TEN YEARS AGO when I was choosing an outfit for my ten year high school reunion. I bought them to go with a black shirt {which I only got rid of last summer, embarrassingly enough} and think I paid somewhere in the neighborhood of twenty bucks for them. I got them at Fashion Bug, which is no longer even in business, at least around here. Why I remember all these things, I do not know.

But these pants need. to. go. They no longer fit well, especially after the weight I recently lost. They're big - especially in the rear end. So baggy. {Ironically that's one reason why I still love them so. They make me feel skinny!!} They are a bit long, and over the decade of wear, the ends have become frayed. They have no pockets {grrr} but the reason I keep them and love them SO MUCH is that they're stretchy like jammie pants, and they don't have a bulky clasp at the waist, so they lay flat under shirts. I don't need extra bulk there!! I have looked for a pair to replace them MANY times over this decade, but have yet to find something that lays flat like they do. Maybe this is my year?

Clearly I have gotten my money's worth out of these pants, and because they made it into my closet WELL in advance of the capsule project, the entry fee is ZERO DOLLARS. {Side note: the tag is so faded from a decade of washing, I can no longer see the size on these, but knowing the level of fluffiness I was ten years ago, I'm going to guess these are a large.}

Two.

The second pair of pants I kept in this adventure were the brown pants. These were among the first of the new clothes I got six years ago when I lost weight and nothing I owned fit anymore. I got these at Cato, and they are much like the black pants in that they have an elastic waist and therefore no bulky clasp. WHY DID THEY NOT HAVE THESE IN BLACK??? I could be six years ahead of the black pants I own! :)

While I don't wear brown as often as I wear black {at least in dress clothes}, I kept these pants because I felt they were a good basic staple. They still fit well and the construction is holding up nicely, even though they are six years old. And of course, I appreciated the entry fee of ZERO DOLLARS.  And these are a size medium - one of the first medium pieces I was ever able to fit into after my first weight loss!!

Having said that, I truly hardly ever wear these, and you know what I think I might actually wear more of if I had them? White pants. Dangerous, yes, for a klutz like me. But I wear so much blue and black, that I think white pants would be a way better staple than these brown ones. So I will keep these for now, but I think I'm going to keep my eye out for a good pair of white pants.

Three.

 I started the capsule with just the two pairs of pants but had been on the lookout for a good khaki-ish pair of pants. It seemed like every pair I had tried in the last few years just didn't fit right. And while I realized this was a lot to ask from a single pair of pants, I wanted something that wasn't too dressy, but also wasn't too casual. I wanted to be able to wear them around the house without feeling like I was overdressed for my day, but I also wanted to be able to dress them up when necessary.

When I was out in Virginia Beach this past fall, Lynnette and I spent a morning at her Cato, and that's where I found these khaki colored linen pants. They have an elastic/drawstring waist, which I like {because apparently that is the key to my dress pants!} and I could see myself dressing them up or down pretty easily. They only had one pair, which happened to be a medium, and they were on sale for $9.99, half price from the original $19.99. I felt like I couldn't pass them up, so I grabbed them and have really liked them! They really are ridiculously comfortable, and they work just like I imagined - easily dressed up or down.

So I have a working-completed section of the wardrobe with these pants. They get me through the occasions where I need to do better than a pair of jeans, and other than needing to replace one {maybe two} of them, I feel that owning these three articles is completely sufficient for this season of my life. {Full disclosure note - those khaki pants are very wide leg, and my legs are much skinnier now than they used to be. So if I found a pair of khaki pants that had a more tapered leg, I might add those as a fourth pair just for days when I want skinny pants.}

Three pairs of pants for the capsule wardrobe: Check{ish}
Total cost for pants: $9.99
Size Breakdown: Large{?}, Medium,  Medium
Color Base for Capsule: Black, Brown, Tan
Bekah: Not thrilled with the current state of this section of the capsule...needs perfection, and possibly completion. 

 

Beauty and Hope

Dog sitting has created a new world for me this week. Not just the kind of week that makes me want to keep this dog {although there is that...} but the kind of week that forces me to have a different kind of life for a minute.

And I would dare to say it's the kind of life I needed to have for a minute.

I've stopped to smell the roses.

Literally.

Because it turns out we have rose bushes, and it turns out dogs need to go to the bathroom frequently.

So while Phoebe thinks about the best possible spot to fertilize the yard, I just wander up and down the row of bushes and drink in the utter beauty of buds bursting into bloom.

Some blossomed days ago and are starting to crinkle and wither, and others are such tight buds that I can't even see the color of the blooms on that bush yet.

Kind of feels like our life in this season...heavy with beauty and parts still waiting to burst open while other parts are settling into completion.

And where these flowers are concerned, it all feels like one big bonus. We had no idea there were so many beautiful plants awaiting us. A January house hunt concealed all that. Everything was buried beneath winter, and slowly, in the two months we've been here, it's burst forth, piece by flowering piece to surprise us.

And if it weren't for Miss Phoebe, I would have missed a good chunk of this glory this week. {And a handful of stunning sunsets, too.}

It's good to pause and find the hope hidden right outside your own door.