SSMT: Verse 3

Yesterday was a new verse day for the Siesta Scripture Memory Team! Since I devoted yesterday to honoring Carol's memory, I waited until today to tell you my new verse!

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.

~ Ephesians 1:17 ~

Several years ago, during a time of prayer and study, God prompted my heart that the book of Ephesians was the book I should study regarding my someday marriage. As I've read through it several times, I can see how it makes a wonderful guide for a husband and wife! In fact, when Isaac and I were dating, and he was going through his wilderness, I used to read the entire book aloud every night as a prayer over his life.

Last month, one of my devos in Sparkling Gems from the Greek talked about this particular verse, and as I studied it, God drew me to commit it to memory. And so...it becomes verse number three. And to be honest, I don't think it's coincidental that I'm studying it during the Valentine's Day season.

Here are some things that stuck out to me as I ripped apart the verse and did a word study:

* I keep asking...Sometimes I get tired of praying for things. You ever feel that way? You ask and ask and ask...and wonder if God is even listening? But this verse reminds me - to keep asking.

* may give you... When I read about this verse in the devotional book, the author said this word "give" means to hand something over completely to someone else. To impart. When I think about praying this verse for my husband, this reminds me that the wisdom and direction he will need to find me in the first place...and then to lead me...is going to be given to him by the Lord. Imparted to him. Handed over to him. And likewise, the wisdom I will need to serve beside him will be given to me by the same Father. Changes my perspective a bit. It's not something I have to control!

* wisdom...The author of the devo said that this word means insight not naturally attained. God will give Mr. Missing and me a sort of supernatural insight regarding our life, love, and ministry, if we will open our hearts to receive it!

* revelation... This explanation was my favorite. The author said it means something veiled for a long time and suddenly, instantaneously made clear. He even went so far as to describe it as a person who stands in front of a window with a curtain drawn over it. He said when revelation occurs, it's like the curtain is pulled away and the person can see the view that has been on the other side of the window the entire time.

* so that you may know him better. The entire point of all of this is not personal gain - but to know the Lord better (AND BETTER!). If God is going to take the time to issue wisdom and revelation to me...to draw back curtains and give me an insight I could not have had without His intervention...He's going to desire that I use that to know HIM better, not to become some overly proud smarty pants.

So this verse is actually my prayer - for myself and for the man I will marry. I commit to KEEP PRAYING for God to GIVE us WISDOM and REVELATION even now so that we can work to KNOW HIM BETTER AND BETTER both now and when we come together as life partners.

And all of this makes me think of a song I have come to dearly love in the last few weeks. It's also a prayer I have for the man I'll marry, and I think it fits with this verse very well. The song is by Sanctus Real and is called Lead Me.

My Sweet Carol

Ten years ago today, I received a phone call at work. The caller, my roommate at the time, told me sweet baby Carol had died. Today I want to honor her short, but beautiful life. This is an article I wrote about her a few weeks after her death in 2001.

I wiped my eyes and stared at the floor, embarrassed that I still cried about this; it happened weeks ago and no one else was crying at the drop of a hat. I stopped listening to what the man at the front of the church was saying and started the often-repeated conversation with God yet one more time. Maybe you've had a similar conversation, though your circumstances may be different. The conversation that begins, "God, it's not fair!"

My "not fair" conversation was about Carol. Two of my dearest friends were expecting their first baby and asked me to be in the delivery room when their child was born. I went through nineteen hours of labor and delivery with them before Caroline Elizabeth Anne decided to make her appearance.
I spent time with them every Monday night, holding Carol and playing with her. Sometimes she laughed at me. Sometimes she yelled because I wasn't her mom, and Mom was always her preference.

Then, one day I got a phone call saying Carol was gone. It was her six month birthday. Two days earlier she had been fine, but now she was dead. I was stunned...I hadn't been given time to prepare or say goodbye. And I was angry. Carol's parents had gone through so many trials in the past few years. It wasn't fair that they should have to give up their baby. I know that all things work together for good, and I know that God has a different plan. I even know that His ways are higher than my ways - all the phrases people like to say when someone dies unexpectedly - but I still thought it was unfair!

What seemed even more unfair was that, though Chris and Trudy, Carol's parents, grieved and went through their angry time too, they seemed to accept God's will quickly and had an amazing peace about their baby's death. I didn't. I pretended to whenever I was around them, but I just couldn't grasp the purpose of God's will. I had trusted God when other friends or family members had died, but this time, I just couldn't accept it. And my anger and frustration only grew when I noticed that others seemed to comprehend a part of God's plan that I couldn't comprehend.

One evening, two and a half months after Carol's death, I sat outside and wrote a letter to her. I told her, "Two days after you cried in frustration that I was holding you and I was not your Mom, and then you laughed at all my silly faces to make up for it, you were gone to Heaven.

"You didn't warn us that you were about to leave. You heard Jesus calling you, so you went. And you left me here, wishing you were back. I wouldn't care if you laughed or cried. I'd take either just to get you back here in my arms one more time. Exactly six months...that was your mission from God, and you completed it.

"You taught me the importance of awareness and truth. You always knew what was going on around you. Nothing fooled you. You knew exactly who held you and if it wasn't the person you wanted, you squalled until you ended up with the person of your choice.

"And you taught me to treasure the present. If I had known from the start that I would only have six months with you, I would have taken time to enjoy each part of your life, instead of wishing you into the next phase. I would have paid attention to detail so that I would have more memories to hold onto now that you are gone."

After I wrote the letter, something changed in my heart. I saw that Carol's life had a purpose and a time frame. She completed her purpose in her time frame. That's more than most seasoned adults have accomplished. Through her life and death, many who loved her have learned how to depend on God more completely. They have examined their own hearts and grown closer to the Lord.

1 Peter 1:6-7 says, "In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed."

When I look at Chris and Trudy, I see that the trials they have endured, up to and including giving their daughter up to God, have increased their faith. They have a beautiful relationship with the Lord. They have trusted Him through all He has asked of them. They have walked through the fire and come through with a strong, genuine faith.

What a lesson of faith God taught through a tiny six-month-old baby who never spoke a word, yet lived and died as a testimony of God's grace and love.

Your Aunt Bekah still loves and misses you, sweet girl. Can't wait to hold you in Heaven one day.

Caroline Elizabeth Anne Hancock

August 1, 2000 - February 1, 2001

January: Done.

As of today...January's done.

Which of course, raises the question...if you made new year's goals, are you still headed toward them? Or have you completely abandoned all resolution and become the you of...well...last year?

I have to say I'm pleased with this month. I was nervous about how I would do in my first month back in "real life." After months of being hidden away spiritually and emotionally, I wasn't sure I could hang onto that intimacy with God and live life again. And certainly I didn't do everything right. I had my share of head-shaking moments. But today I'd like to celebrate what went right this month.

And if you kept even one of your goals - you should celebrate, too!

* Though I didn't set out to make this a habit, I did get up early every day to spend time with the Lord before I started the day. That is a Bekahland first (in 32 years)! I'm so thankful for those moments. I never thought morning devos would be "my thing" but now I can't imagine NOT starting the day that way!

* I got back into working out five days a week. I'd slacked to three for most of last year, but I'm back to five, and I'm keeping my goal of switching up the kind of exercise I do (walking, running, cardio, strength training...how is it that I even know these words!??!). I hate admitting it...but I do feel better. And I never would have dreamed I'd get through level 2 of that 30 Day Shred without keeping paramedics on standby. While I still am far from being good enough to be IN the dvd (ha!) I am now surviving it. Miracles abound.

* I've been diligent about cooking and planning ahead for meals, rather than living on cups of macaroni and cheese and bags of lettuce - or daily diets of fast food. Found out my passion for cooking did not die in the desert! I tried three new recipes and found two of them to be keepers. Stay tuned for those!

* I invited friends over for meals three times in one month - which is probably more than all of last year combined. And each time I sit across the table from a friend who has come to eat with me, call me crazy, but I'm aware that I'm blessed to have friends who want to come over and eat a meal with me. That honestly moves me.

* Though I was tardy in sending some of them, I returned to card making for the first time in months. I'll admit my creative juices aren't really flowing yet, but I'll give them time.

* Shocking even my own self, I memorized two Bible verses this month as part of the Siesta Scripture Memory Team. And not only did I memorize them, I was disciplined through their words (and that HURT)! I thought this project was going to just be about committing words to memory but God seems to have a much bigger plan in mind.

* I worked on a new writing project - which I'm very excited to watch unfold. I have no idea where it's going right now, but I'm journeying with it to see where it leads. Since I spent most of the end of last year focusing on the sale of the book I wrote before, I hadn't spent much time at the computer writing!

* I began meeting with my new mentor and am looking forward to more time together with her and seeing what God wants me to learn from her life and path. She's fun to laugh with and even in just our first two meetings, I've learned beautiful truths.

* For the first time in about three years, I braved teaching junior high Sunday School and found that I love it and love the girls in my class. They really do have beautiful hearts and spirits eager to learn and grow.

* I finished reading two books and read parts of others, which is a huge step for me...hadn't been able to focus on a book for a while.

So I declare January to be a huge success in re-entry to life. It's a YAY GOD month!

Stone Altar: End of January

It's the Weekly Recap!

* Last Sunday I had lunch with my parents at their house. I used to stop by for lunch about once a month, but during the months I didn't eat...I didn't go. So I'm trying to be a better daughter by showing up for lunch again. :)

And after my nap, I cuddled up on the couch to watch the Signature Sound Tribute to the Cathedral Quartet. Some friends from church, who know I'm a total Gaither groupie, asked if I'd seen this one, and I hadn't, so they let me borrow it for a few days. My college roommate, Jenny, and I loved the Cathedrals and even went to a couple of their concerts. These songs definitely brought back memories - and yes, a couple of them made me cry.



* Monday evening I got together with my friend Ronda to do some trip planning! We've decided to go on vacation later this year, and we had to figure out what dates worked and begin the dreaming process. I'm so excited about this trip because it will be another first for Bekah. More details on that later.

* Tuesday was the Independence Day celebration with Faith. Since I already posted about it, enough said on that!



* Oh people...let me tell you about Wednesday. I had a grumpy sort of day and that night I just did not feel like working out. So I decided I'd go ahead and cash in my "free day" and take it easy. I kicked back, opened my email, and found a message from my new friend, Jamie. She'd been going through some pictures at WBCL Radio (where she works) and found this one of me from a scrapbook night the station hosted maybe five or so years ago. I won the door prize:
Are you kidding me? Who let me out looking like that? I shut the computer, put on my workout clothes and enjoyed forty minutes of vigorous workout on the mini-stepper. I'm going to print out that picture and hang it on my refrigerator with a sign that says "Are you sure you want to eat?"

* Thursday I had to give a presentation at work so I wore my fancy britches and made sure my hair was decent, and had it not been for the giant zit I've sprouted on my face, it could have been declared a nearly perfect day. The presentation went well...and then I went to lunch in Baldwin, where I saw Brian Holland, who deserves a blog mention. :)

And then...when our secretary zipped across campus for something and left her pizza-toe shoes behind in favor of her snow boots, I figured they were fair game...so I tried them on:
I was dreadfully unable to walk in them...but they were blessed cute!

* After the week that wouldn't end....it did...finally. Friday I spent the whole evening hanging out with my mentor, Lara. We had dinner at Montana Mike's (never been there before, but had their chicken tostada salad and it was so yummy...and simultaneously sinus-cleansing with its chipotle-ranch dressing), went shopping for some new clothes for her (I got the very important role of opinion-sharer), grabbed some coffee at Starbucks, and spent hours continuing to learn more about each other's stories. It is not lost to me that this friendship/time of learning has been God-ordained in every way. I love it.

* Saturday, I hopped in a van with some ladies from my church and we traveled to the mother-ship. (The Gaither Store.) I warned them ahead of time that I can be an embarrassment to myself and others when surrounded by so much David Phelps, but I managed to reign it in yesterday. It was crazy busy at the store because they were hosting the premier of the newest tapings, but we did get a wonderful lunch there - and I topped it off with this: the best frappe in the entire world - is made at Gaither Family Resources.
Y'all, I'm a coffee addict. I've had frappes everywhere. None are ever better than GFR. I'm not kidding.
And, my friend Arlene bought me a present there, too! I love it. For every coffee addict who is also prone to tears:
Pocket tissues! Thanks, Arlene! You made my DAY!
Favorite God Moment of the Whole Week: As I fell asleep one night, I was praying about a situation that has caused me some struggle, and God nudged me awake and urged me to let go of that...in exchange for something HE has waiting for me. It was such a beautiful moment. I loved it.
Books I am Reading This Week: It was another crazy busy week, as you can see, so very little time to read. I stayed consistent in Sparkling Gems from the Greek and started reading The Peanut Butter Man - a book I'm reviewing for the reading course committee I'm on.
Goal Update from Last Sunday: Well...I did pretty well not adding anything to my schedule. I did add that lunch with my parents, and I agreed to help a friend with something yesterday, but she canceled on me, so it evened out. I DID use the word no a few other times. And the food journal was a success. I think it's a form of accountability that works for me! Needs some tweaking but I like it. It stays.
Goals for the Coming Week: Finish one book (don't want to hold up the ones I'm reviewing), get my brake light fixed (if I don't put it on here, I won't do it), print out pictures for my work frames (another thing I won't remember to update if I don't have to report on it!)...and that should keep me busy.

The Stone Altar

I can't believe we're almost to the end of January and I'm just now telling you about this. Shame on me!

This journey began for me back in 2003. I received an email from Janet Paschal (a southern gospel singer...it was a mass email...I don't have that good of a connection with anyone) in which she shared about some people she had met at recent concerts. This paragraph caught my attention, and following the excerpt is a portion of what I wrote about it:

"I met Crystal, who promised herself she wouldn't cry when we talked, but who cried anyway, as she recounted a dark period in her life when the music had sustained her. She kept apologizing, but I knew what she felt. She thought she was emotional because she was talking with me, but I knew it was much more than that. Our conversation was taking her back to a place of remembrance. She had, unknowingly, erected an altar of remembrance, much like those in the Old Testament when the Israelites piled stones in places where God had delivered them out of dire circumstances. Years later, they would bring their children and grandchildren back to these altars, pick up stone after stone, and recount God's deliverances. Last night, Crystal was picking up stones, and it had little, if anything to do with me."
After reading that portion of her e-mail, I did a mental inventory of the stones in my own spiritual altar. As I thought about those moments that were so pivotal that they became another stone in my altar, I found myself thankful that I love to journal. So many of these times have been captured and preserved among the various ramblings in my prayer journal.

There are many stones...some just pebbles...that make up my spiritual altar. But I wanted to share these with you, because these are the rocks...the ones I can see from a distance. I'm hoping that this week maybe you will spend some time picking up stones from your own altar and recounting the blessings God has given you in your life. And I hope that as more stones are added to your pile, you will give them the honor they deserve...that you will document them in some way so that the generations that come behind you will be able to see God's faithfulness on the altar of your journal...your box of index cards...scribbling of notes on random sheets...

...and eight years later, I'm taking my own challenge to heart. One of my goals for this year was to begin to construct an "altar." I committed to journal about a moment or event each day that can be considered a stone in the altar of my 2011. Some are rocks and some are pebbles, but working together, they make an altar I can look back upon and say this is when God worked in my life.

I have just under twenty pages of memories that comprise the month of January. Beautiful moments when God met me...taught me...provided for me...comforted me...disciplined me...revealed to me...and reminded me of my place in His heart.

And because I love the tangible...I also have a jar...with an actual stone in it for each day...something I can watch to be reminded of the work God is doing in my life.

If you're looking for a way to see God at work in your life...give it a try. You might be surprised at the pivotal moments hidden in a month. Even in a day.

Hand Me Downs

** I'm interrupting myself to say...I don't know whether or not you ever read the (In)Courage blog that is in my link list to the left, but if you don't...and you are waiting on something to come to fruition in your life, read today's post. It's simple, beautiful, honest, and thought provoking. Not surprising...a big chunk of it made its way into my journal. Check it out if that's your season of life right now! Okay...back to my regularly scheduled programming. **


I don't know whether or not you're a fan of hand-me-downs, but I have absolutely no aversion to them.

Maybe that's because I did not grow up at the same time my sisters did, so even as the youngest kid, I wasn't forced to wear their leftovers. Maybe that made hand-me-downs fun for me...who knows!?

Last week, the secretary in our office cleaned out her closet and brought me a huge shopping bag full of clothes to try on. I was able to get seven things (some tops, some skirts) for $15 from her! It was like my own little garage sale! (And she buys way, way, way better brands than I'd ever dream of, so even her leftovers are better than my originals!)

And while I definitely appreciated that blessing...it's also a great blessing to get free hand-me-downs. Don't you just love 'em?

This has been a great month for freebies for me!

Mom has a little entry way at her house, and she does a beautiful job of decorating it for every month. She happened to mention to me that she had more snowmen for January than she could fit in that little room. I suggested she build a bigger entry way. (HA!) She said if I could use any of them, I was welcome to "borrow" them and she'd let me know if she needed them back. (We both know she's not going to do that.) So check out some of my new snowmen. Love the way they look!

Thanks, Mom!

And here was my other fun acquisition for January...

On Christmas, I insisted on a family picture. (No one was excited about that, but I didn't care. And I won.) My brother-in-law, Tom, found it rather amusing that I started borrowing recently opened gifts to make a stack of boxes high enough for the camera to rest for my picture. (He has no idea that I do such things on a regular basis at home!) So while I was busy stacking away, he said, "Hey Julie, don't we have a tripod at home that we never use?"

Last week, I came home to find a box on my porch:

It's going to revolutionize my picture taking life. Words cannot express.

Scotcharoos

My mom used to make these when I was growing up. In fact, I don't recall that she ever made regular Rice Krispie treats, but we had these every now and then. So now, of course, I prefer these to the regular ones. These are the lattes of Rice Krispie treats! :)

Because I'm always on the lookout for a good treat to take to church or work carry-ins, I got the recipe from Mom, and it's on the rotation of things to contribute. This would not be one to take on a hot summer day (meltage) but it's good for an indoor party! And because it contains cereal, it makes a great breakfast! (Okay that might be a stretch.)

Random story...I made these just this week for a carry-in at church, but I hid a couple away to take to my parents. Mom called me after I dropped them off to tell me she ate one and a half of them, and was planning to eat the rest...but Dad halted his pie-eating to try out the bite she hadn't eaten. When he was done, he asked her why she doesn't make them anymore. She informed me the ingredients are now on the grocery list. SWEET! I inspired the resurrection of the scotcharoo in my parents' house!

The Recipe:

1 cup corn syrup
1 cup sugar
1 cup creamy peanut butter (divided in half)
6 cups Rice Krispies
1/2 bag chocolate chips
1/2 bag butterscotch chips

Bring sugar and corn syrup to a boil in a large pan. Remove from heat and add 1/2 cup of peanut butter. Stir until creamy. Add Rice Krispies and mix well. Pour into greased cookie sheet or 9x13 dish. In a small bowl, melt chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, and other 1/2 cup of peanut butter. Stir well and spread over Rice Krispie mixture. After it cools, cut into bars and serve.

You can certainly use store brand cereal and peanut butter. I usually do. Must have not been able to find either on that shopping trip! Because I don't often make recipes calling for butterscotch chips, I use half the bag and then put the other half in a sealed bag and save it for the next time. You can use either milk chocolate or semi-sweet...whichever you like!


Make sure you stir the sugar and corn syrup well as it cooks so you don't end up burning the bottom of the pan. That's a mess to clean up!

It needs to come to a good boil but you don't need to let it boil on and on....and these spatulas work great for stirring it! Mine is from Pampered Chef.

Of course...my favorite peanut butter measuring cup. And I know my high school Home Ec teacher would be mortified, but I do measure the cereal in a liquid cup so I can measure the first four cups at once...and then add two more. Shhhh...don't tell.

Once the sugar and corn syrup have come to a boil, I add the cereal and peanut butter and stir. (Sometimes I add the peanut butter into the mix first and sometimes I forget and throw it in all at once. Either way works.) This is why it's important to have a big pan to start with!

Mix it up really well - but leave some on the spatula for a taste test!

If you need more servings, pat the mixture into a greased cookie sheet. They will be short but you'll have more of them. I usually put mine in a 9x13 - so they're thicker, even though I don't get as many out of it.

I just put the two kinds of chips and the peanut butter in a small mixing bowl and heat them in the microwave. I heat them for about 50 seconds at a time, stirring in between to keep them from burning.

Stir it up so it's nice and smooth!

And....spread over the Rice Krispie mix! Once the chocolate hardens up (I usually let it sit overnight just for good measure) you can cut them into squares and serve them!

Independence Day

You all remember my friend, Faith. This past year and a half has been a tumultuous time in her life. She went through a divorce (which is not something I'm gossiping to you...she'd tell you about it herself) and has begun to build a new life. She's had her share of meltdowns and anger and doubts and fears but overall, I have to say I couldn't have pushed through it with the determination that she did most of the time.

She and I had planned to get together last night to catch up...and then she realized yesterday was the one year anniversary of her new start on life, so we turned it into a celebration.

We started with dinner. I made BBQ chicken, ranch pasta salad, and fruit...with scotcharoos for dessert. (Stay tuned tomorrow for that recipe!)
After dinner, we dug into the sparkling grape juice...the official approved drink of celebrations in Bekahland!

Here's to a new beginning (again) for both of us! I have to interrupt my story of her Independence Day to tell you that God also met me in a very beautiful way yesterday. I was struggling through a time of feeling...not overly eager to celebrate with Faith. (Shame on me!) I was caught up in what had not transpired in my life in the past year...and it brought on some discouragment.

But God reminded me of my SSMT verse....about demolishing pretensions that set themselves up against the knowledge of God...about taking thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ...and He reminded me this is a new start for me, too! That He has been so faithful to me in ways that I have seen and loved. I am not forgotten.

Furthermore, He reminded me that it was the 25th - a day He has redeemed more than once, and He did it again. You go, God!

The celebration girl...she reminisced with me about how God not only met her needs in this past year, but as she looked back even three...four...five years ago, He was lining up life details to sustain her in this time.

This was a year ago...when we got together to mark the beginning of her journey....

And here we were last night looking at the scrapbook of that journey. God has indeed been good!

When Words Go Wrong

I'm not entirely sure how to write this post, but it must be written.

For several months now, I have been mentally walking on eggshells about my blog. I was confronted about something I posted...something that was misconstrued. After the confrontation, I was left in a puddle of tears and intense self-doubt. Isaac and I were still dating at the time and I talked to him about it. He wisely advised me not to let one person steal my joy and to just keep being me. I wanted to follow his advice, because I knew he was right. I tried even. But I read every post at least a dozen times before I let it go...and sometimes I deleted and started over...deleted and started over...essentially living enslaved to the fear of another confrontation.

This year, I determined to not live in that slavery any more. It's my blog. I think and pray about the things I post and when the Lord convicts me, I delete. (And oh yes...there have been deleted paragraphs...even entire posts.) It's a system we have and I like to think it works.

Unfortunately it seems that my two recent posts about shopping at Wal Mart have offended someone, and for that, I am sorry. Please know that the intention of my heart was to bring laughter...not hurt. I found both those situations amusing - even in the moments where they were simultaneously irritating. I shared them because part of "being Bekah" seems to be getting caught up in moments such as those. For me, they happen at Wal Mart. For others, they may happen at work or restaurants or, according to the Airline TV show I love to watch...the airport.

My life is full of many things. (That's one way of saying well-rounded, in case you weren't sure.) I'm passionate when I write about each facet. That's why one day, I'll share a recipe and tell you the story of why I love it so. And then the next day I can't wait to tell you what I learned in Bible study. And perhaps the day after that, I might want to let you peek into an evening I had with my friends.

The blog is called Bekah's BITS. Bits of all parts of my life. The deep, the doubtful, the celebratory, the educational, the silly, and yes, even the annoyed. I know, from your comments and from the messages you send me outside of the blog, that sometimes you are moved by what you read here. And sometimes you roll your eyes at me because you think I'm silly. Sometimes I don't love being eye-rolled but it's okay. I live an occasionally eye-roll-inducing life. Sometimes I make you think, sometimes I make you cry, and sometimes I make you laugh. As a writer, I want to do all those things. So I love it when the plan succeeds.

But I hope, hope hope you would know my heart enough by now to know it is never my intention to offend. The posts about Wal Mart were not meant to degrade anyone who works there or even the shoppers who were creating the amusement for me. They were just bits of my life that made me laugh, so I wrote about them.

When I originally crafted this apology, I also included a vow to stop writing about my adventures at Wal Mart or other places where "only Bekah" moments might occur. But like I said...I pray about what I post and this time I got a conviction on it. At church Sunday, one of the verses our pastor mentioned was Acts 5:29, which says, "Peter and the other apostles replied: 'We must obey God rather than human beings!'"

And as I heard the words, God reminded me that my filter on this blog comes from HIM, not from others. I'm never going to please every reader every day. And that's okay. (I mean, I want to, but I know it's not going to happen.) But He reminded me that if there's something He wants me to eliminate, He'll let me know. And that means if there's a Wal Mart post He finds offensive, He'll speak to my heart about it before it goes online. And regardless of the topic, I answer to Him, not to any of you. So I don't feel I can make a promise to never write about Wal Mart (or anything else) again because I don't believe He is pleased with such a blanket promise.

Having said all that....to those of you who frequent here...thank you for coming back day after day (or however often you do). Many of you have become family to me and you know the last thing I'd ever want to do is hurt you. Words are powerful and should be handled so carefully. I do know that. And so if I have injured you with mine, please hear my apology and I would love it if you'd accept it.

Angela

When I first graduated from college, I had a roommate named Angie. We lived together less than a year before we decided to part ways. I was alone for a (terrifying) summer before God opened the door for a new roommate to move in with me. Her name is Angela. (I try to stick with names I know.)

I met Angela in the last semester of college, when we had a Bible class together and sat next to each other. That year right after college, while I was living with Angie, she was involved with a year-long mission trip to Croatia. Angela decided to move back here, enroll in the graduate counseling program at IWU, and she needed a place to live.

I love how God works. I needed a roommate...she needed a place to live. Lord KNOWS I needed some counseling and she needed practice. It was a good match.

Angela and I are about as opposite in personality as two girls can be. I am (and was a thousand times more so back then) far too organized, OCD, and rule-following for my own good. She was a motorcycle-owning free spirit who cared more about people than accomplishing tasks. I learned immeasurable amounts of life wisdom from her in the three years we lived together.

Angela stayed around town for a while, even after moving out of my house, and then a couple of years ago, she moved to Michigan to work on her PhD. (I'm still recovering from undergrad, thankyouverymuch.)

We're still friends, and to prove it, here's a picture of the two of us from back in August of 09, when she came to town for a day and stopped by to see me.

A year ago, about this time, I received a number of phone calls from Angela, asking me if I had any tips on how to work through migraines. (My college boyfriend had migraines, so I was used to sitting with him while he tried to survive them.) I felt sorry for her that she was hurting so badly and I gave her all the advice I had...none of which was very helpful.

And then I opened up Facebook one night last spring to see a note that she'd had brain surgery. (She ended up going to the ER one night when a headache got too painful and they discovered a brain tumor. She had the surgery just a couple of days later.)

The months since then have been filled with so much trial for Angela. They discovered she did indeed have cancer, and she started undergoing treatment. She dealt with side effects (sickness, hair loss, you name it) and has kept a strong spirit throughout all of it.

This past week, she posted a new note on Facebook. Her second opinion doctor said her cancer is stage four, and his time frame for her life was not as long as a mid-thirties girl would like it to be. I'm amazed at how well she continues to handle it (even if she's not as brave inside as she is outside...she's still blowing me away with the outside part).

I say all of this to say...she has made a specific prayer request and I wanted to share it with you, should you be so inclined to join her (and those of us who are praying now) in prayer. Isaiah 38 talks about a man named Hezekiah who became ill to the point of death. Isaiah went to see him and told him he needed to make his final life plans because he would die. Hezekiah prayed and the Lord granted him 15 more years of life.

And that is Angela's request - for 15 more years.

The Bible says the Lord knows the number of our days (Job 14:5), but I don't think He's offended when we ask for a better prognosis than a doctor can give, so I'm joining Angela in her prayer. She also posted her Bucket List...and she is going to need those years to fulfill her dreams. And I'd love to see her cross each one from the list.

Thanks for "listening." This is Angela now - and I think she's just beautiful - don't you?

It's the Weekly Recap!

* Last Sunday, as you know, I had my first ever Pancakes with the Princess lunch at my house. Inspired by my friend Jenna and her husband, who host Pancakes with the Pastor regularly, I was excited to get back into entertaining again. My friends who came over were so much fun, and I've declared round one to be a success! Already planning round two....

* Did you enjoy a day off work Monday? If you did, then I'm jealous, party of one! I not only went to work, but it was one of our big campus visit days, so I had to iron extra dressy clothes and wear heels and everything! It was like the anti-holiday! But I do love the big visit days - so much fun to meet with prospective students who are excited about college! That is one aspect of my job I absolutely adore.

* Tuesday I went to lunch with my Monday lunch date, Jenny. (Yes, you read that right.) We went to Fazolis (ever have a day when you just need carbs?) and I tried out their new mini bakes. Pretty much shown actual size here. :) I was excited about it because their regular portions are always too big for me, so this was Bekah-sized food. But it CRACKED ME UP when I sat down with my tray and looked at my broccoli chicken mushroom alfredo. There were these three itty bitty spriglets of broccoli, four shriveled up mushrooms, and two (maybe three?) token pieces of chicken. So of course I had to take a picture.



Funny - but truly delicious.
Almost lost my life on the track at school after work. It's a two-lane indoor track, and walkers are supposed to take the inner lane so runners can use the outside for a passing lane. I was jogging and came up behind a walker. I looked over my right shoulder to see if I had any hard core runners rounding the bend before I passed her, and seeing no one, I looked ahead again, only to find the walker was doing some sort of lunge exercise! She'd come to a dead stop on the (very busy!) track. I almost tripped over her but I was able to step sideways in time.
And then, to round out the day, I went to a (blog anonymous) friend's house to watch her baby for a couple of hours. Much cuddling and sleeping (on the part of the baby...I was not sleeping on the job), and just a little bit of playing with stuff like this:
(And yes...I played with it more than the baby did. Kid toys are way fun!)

* We had a surprise ice stormlet Wednesday. Nothing compared to ice storms I've seen in years gone by, but since we weren't really expecting it, it made for an interesting commute (skate) to work. Where are the triple lutz skills when you need them?
* Early last year, I worked out a few times each week with a friend I met at work. Her name is Kristy. Neither of us were good about going to the weight room alone, but we enjoyed going together. Then she got engaged, and I went into my desert, and we quit going to the gym. So now, we go to lunch every now and then instead. LOL! Thursday we had a lunch date at Moe's. Chicken quesadilla, baby!
It snowed on Thursday (because, apparently, we'd not had enough fun with the ice on Wednesday) and when I came out of work, someone had scraped my car for me! That was the nicest blessing. I was admittedly in a bit of a cantankerous mood after work that day, so it really perked me up!
And this will crack you up. To preserve my dignity, I did not take a picture of this. When I got home from work, I knew I needed to shovel and I also knew I should do it before I got all toasty warm. I'd worn a sweater dress to work, so I needed to put on something warmer before going outside. But I didn't want to entirely change clothes. So here's what I wore to shovel: brown tights with red and blue warm up pants over them, my brown "hooker boots" (which are NOT snow boots), and my green sweater dress (over the warm up pants but peeking out from under my coat). It would have served me right to fall down and need medical assistance while dressed as a What No To Wear special.
* I needed a low-key weekend, so I was actually excited to not have many plans. Friday night after I worked out (and that included nearly losing my pants on the track...they weren't tied tightly enough and oh goodness did that almost lead to disaster!) I went home to this scrumptiousness:
I'll definitely be making this again - cheesy tortellini in the slow cooker. I'll post a recipe for you next time. (I even boiled eggs and made croutons for the salad earlier this week!)

* Yesterday I enjoyed a beautiful day that alternated between pathetically lazy and blissfully productive. I had some chores to do and I did them...but I also took full advantage of the opportunity to rest and enjoy. (Which was good, since it was blessed cold and I spent a good chunk of the day in my jammies and pink fuzzy bathrobe - sporting TWO pairs of socks.)
When I did venture outside, I took this:

Favorite God Moment of the Whole Week: I had a variety of moments this week when God nudged me to understand that something taking place right then...would become wildly significant to me later. I don't understand what will unfold, but I believe in the unfolding. And to punctuate that point, while in a meeting at work this week, the presenter referenced a position that had been eliminated this year. It was a job I'd wanted when I heard about it a few years ago. I was disappointed then that it didn't work out, but this week, God made sure I heard that sentence and reminded me that He was orchestrating NOW...then.

Books I'm Reading This Week: I am loving Sparkling Gems from the Greek. Still reading Believing God (studying with Olivia). FINISHED In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day. Loved it. Definitely came away challenged.

Goal Update from Last Sunday: I'm excited that I finished one of the books...goal met! I also had the chance to do some writing - both yesterday, when I had a free day, and also on a couple of lunch hours when the weather was too nasty to bother leaving work at lunch time. I took my computer to work with me, shut my office door at lunch, and wrote until the hour was over. (Why is that always far too soon??) I even got some unexpected scrapping in this week!

Goals for the Coming Week: I'm very busy this week with projects and commitments, so my goal is to NOT add anything to my calendar that isn't already there at this very moment. I have extra time...but I also need to keep that time open to rest. So the goal is essentially to exercise the word NO. (oh boy.) Also going to try my hand at keeping a food journal. (Challenge from a friend.) We'll see how that goes!

30 Days of You and Me: Day Thirteen

Today's topic? How do I think others view me?

Oh boy.

I'm not sure I like this one. Partly because I might totally miss the mark...and partly because if I'm too nice to myself, then it looks like I'm bragging. But I can't skip a day because then it becomes 29 days...and I just can't have that. So I shall give it my best effort.

How I think others view me.
By Rebekah J. Freelan

• Quirky
• Funny
• Victim of moments that could not possibly happen to anyone else with such frequency
• Loyal
• Creative
• Good Cook (some might even venture to say great cook)
• Strong (that would be inner strength...not the kind of strength that opens pickle jars)
• Self-disciplined
• Principally opposed to sick days
• Scheduled/Good Planner (must be the response to being an unplanned child!)
• Responsible
• Lover of God (that should have been first on the list but I am using this bullet point thing for the first time and am having technical difficulties...and I'm not starting over)
• Frugal

Okay that's enough. I can't do that anymore! Hopefully I got a few right. If I'm so wrong, please correct me. Gently.
And how about you? How do people see you? (It's harder than you think to make a list! But you should do it. And then I'll tell you what you missed about YOU!)

Price Comparisons

You've probably heard stores like WalMart and Meijer (and others, I'm sure) say they will honor their competitors' prices. I've been in line once or twice behind someone purchasing a case of pop or something...and they'll show the cashier an ad from another store, stating a cheaper price.

But a few days ago, that whole price comparison thing went to a brand new level. I had to go to WalMart. No really, I had to. I needed sausage patties for my Pancakes with the Princess lunch and Meijer didn't have what I wanted. So that was my main goal. Sausage.

Of course, when I went to check out, only half the lanes were open, and the express lanes were backed up through the main aisle and into the clothing. So even though the contents of my cart totaled four $.25 Christmas clearance signs, one $5 cupcake holder, two $.98 boxes of sausage, and a $2.50 box of donut holes for my Sunday School class...I got in a normal line.

I am that person who gets in the slowest line, regardless if it's the longest or the shortest. So I try not to overanalyze and just get in line. That day I chose a line where the person at the front was paying, the next person had two carts, and then it would be my turn. You know...maybe by the time I turned 90.

Or I thought the person at the front was paying. In reality she was waiting for customer service to bring a different vacuum to the register because who-knows-what was wrong with the big old box of a vacuum she'd dragged up there.

The line to the left appeared to be moving more quickly, so I scootchy-scooed over there. The lady unloaded most of her cart onto the belt. You know, minus the couple of bags of pet food and salt under the cart, the four cases of pop and two cases of water IN the cart, and probably something else, too. Just as I was about to lay down the order divider, I heard the words.

I have some price comparisons today, too.

Okay let's talk about the definition of some. Wait. Maybe she meant sum.

She whipped out TWO PAGES of handwritten notes that covered everything from pizza to toilet paper to that stupid salt under the cart. Everything was cheaper somewhere else. So the cashier had to ring up the item and then punch in the better price. (Sometimes she had to run around the counter, zap the item still in the cart, run back around to change the price...run back around to zap something else and then run back to change the price.)

Are you kidding me!??!!?!!

I texted Rachel, our student worker and said, "If I don't show up at work, check Wal Mart, aisle five. And bring me a polar pop." (Except I accidentally typed polar poop. Good thing I caught that before I hit send.)

Then I texted Ronda, since she's my scripture memorizing buddy. I said, "Here's a thought I'm taking captive instead of saying it to the lady in front of me in checkout...If you have a list of better prices at other stores for your WHOLE CART...could you not just go to the other stores to start with?"

Pancakes with the Princess: January

** Quick note...I was invited to be a contributing blogger (I just typed "blotter." Woops) to a new blog called The Intentional Journey. I've added it to my link list, and my first post went up yesterday. - feel free to read along! **


My friend Jenna (who was one of my hostesses during the Wisconsin road trip last fall) is married to a pastor. And they have a tradition of inviting people from the church over for "Pancakes with the Pastor."

Now how much did I love that idea! Unfortunately, I'm not a pastor. But I was nicknamed Princess in college...so I modified.

Last Sunday was my first ever Pancakes with the Princess. I invited a couple of my friends from church, who have become very dear to me since I started attending there. (They're blog anonymous, so you won't see them here...but trust me...they're great!)

Saturday, I got the creative itch, so I put together this little centerpiece for the table:
It's a cupcake holder I got at Wal-Mart for $5, and the little "Let it Snow" sign was in their Christmas clearance for a quarter. Yes please! Then, because cupcakes were not on the menu for Sunday, I decided to get some white styrofoam balls for snowballs! I liked the way it turned out.

I didn't have to make anything before I went to church - but I did rush around a bit when I got home! Here I'm scrambling some eggs...to eat with cheese in them. Mmmmmmm eggs and cheese. My fave.

And I served some little sausage patties. (I've been known to eat just eggs and sausage for lunch when I have been too tired to make a "real meal.")

And then I had to whip up the floofy drink...

The snowman corner...just in keeping with the theme.

I LOVED the way these turned out. I got the idea from Bakerella who got the idea here by someone inspired by this who read about it here. If that doesn't give you enough of an idea...I cannot help you. Mine didn't have faces, but I was okay with that. Willow Tree snowmen, if you will.

I used the leftover donut holes to make a snowball pile behind them. Darling.

The whole idea of doing Pancakes with the Princess was that it wouldn't be overly stressful or a "fixy" meal. (Craft projects excluded.) So here was the spread! Scrambled eggs with the option of cheese, pancakes, sausage, and orange slices. Simple, but filling.

And an orange julius to drink. I only wish I'd had whipped cream for the top. Somehow my supply got low and I failed to notice. Bad Bekah.

But it was such a fun day. I loved waking up Sunday morning and knowing I was having company. I loved welcoming them into my home and sharing with them. Loved our (hilarious) talk and that they were willing to take time to drive over and spend part of the day with me!

Stay tuned for more Pancakes with the Princess reports in future months!

The Thursday Night Saga

Oh yes. The time has come to tell you of the adventures of last Thursday.

I told you in the Sunday recap that Thursday night was my first time to meet up with my brand new mentor, Lara. And you know last week was all about testing and trials and all manner of opportunities for growth. By Thursday night, I was ready. Bring on the mentoring. Bring on the lessons. Bring on the teaching.

I called Mom on the way to Starbucks to let her know what I was doing and that I'd be unavailable for a while. When I got inside Starbucks, I pulled an unprecedented move and put my phone on silent and put it away in my purse. Undivided attention. No interruptions.

Lara and I hunkered down in the comfy chairs in the corner and wrapped our hands around our coffee cups to keep warm. We began sharing the stories of who we are...while Starbucks became increasingly popular around us. Not quite two hours into our visit, we were freezing from the door opening so much...and we couldn't hear very well over the din of study groups.

So...she suggested we go for a drive. Heated seats and a quiet surrounding? YES! So while she gathered up her stuff, I sneaked a peek at my phone. One text. I answered and shoved the phone back in my purse.

Apparently at that time, I inadvertently purse-dialed my parents. Of course, I had no idea, so all Mom heard when she answered was muffled conversation. She hung up.

But then because she's my mom...she wondered if maybe something was wrong and I'd been trying to get help. (I think she was channeling her inner Life Alert Operator...) So she tried to call me back. Unfortunately, by that time, Lara and I were sailing over the back country roads - where cell signals do not abound. So her calls wouldn't go through.

For the next two hours she tried to call me, and I didn't answer. Lara and I were, by that time, chatting comfortably in my living room, while the cats paraded around our feet.

It was almost 11 when we made our way back to Starbucks so I could pick up my car...and as I waited for it to warm up just a moment, I saw I had a voicemail from Mom. I listened - and I heard one panicked little Mama. I hung up mid-message and called her.

She was crying. "Where are you? What is wrong?"

Ummm....I was at Starbucks with Lara? Like I told you?

"I've been trying to call you for two hours. I thought something was wrong. Your dad is on his way over."

WHAT!?!

As I high-tailed it home, Mom's doorbell rang. She said, "Who could that be? Stay with me."

Great. So let me get this straight. You're crying because you think I'm dead. Dad is driving over here to find my body, and now I might have to come talk to the police about YOU because YOU'RE going to the door at 11 pm? Good night nurse.

The doorbell ringing was the friend Dad had called to come over to sit with Mom in case the news about me was...bad.

I called Dad - who was most of the way to my house at that point, sent him back home, and then I went home and GOT MAD.

Not at my parents. We're known for overreacting in my family. I've been known to hunt them down at 11 pm myself. (And I reminded them now THEY know how that feels!) I was mad at Satan. How DARE he take the beautiful night of sharing and learning I'd had with Lara...and ruin it by putting the whole family in upheaval! How DARE he take my quiet moments of journaling and reflection and fill them with tears and guilt for making my parents worry!

I was on to him. And I wasn't happy about it. It shouldn't have surprised me, really. He knew God set up the whole mentoring gig. He knows something good is going to come from it and he wanted to nip it in the bud.

But like Kari told me in that email Friday - Satan may attack, but you are stronger.

Adventures in Being Mentored....

A little over six years ago, a sweet teenager in my church asked if I'd be willing to mentor her.

I'm sorry...what? Did you mean me?

She did, actually.

We started meeting once a week the very day she got her driver's license and could make her way to the coffee shop on her own. We downed countless lattes, wrote in the margins of all sorts of books, exchanged prayer requests, and spurred one another on toward love and good deeds, just like Scripture says to do.

We still talk once a week, but now we do so by phone, because she has graduated from college and moved out of state to begin her life. I think I've always gotten more out of it than she has - but I'm thankful to have been invited to the experience.

In all those years of meeting with her, I began to crave a mentor of my own. Someone older than I...to offer good wisdom and life advice. But...someone young enough to understand what I face and how I approach life. I've asked women before and some said yes...some said no...but nothing ever really happened with any of them.

So for the past couple of years, I've been praying more earnestly for God to send someone to mentor me.

Almost a year ago, I went to a Super Bowl party with some friends from my old church. At the party, I met a sweet, you-gotta-love-her-the-minute-you-meet-her girl named Lara. She'd just moved to the area and started attending that church. We chatted, the Colts lost, and we both went back to our lives.

A few months later (Labor Day weekend, actually) I ran into my former pastor and his wife at the Wal Mart, of all places, and she invited me to be part of their Beth Moore ladies Bible study that fall. (Yes please!) Guess who else went to Bible study?

Lara.

God told me - That's your girl. Ask her to meet with you. I said "But she'll probably say no. Besides, she barely knows me." Ask her.

So I compromised. (How in the world God puts up with me when I pull these stunts is beyond me.) I emailed her to tell her I was so glad to have met her.

Nice obedience, Bek.

Convicted, I emailed her back and fessed up....and I asked if she'd mentor me.

Guess what?

She said yes.

Here's what I love:

1) I met her a year ago - at football party. How unlikely is that?

2) I re-met her last fall - at a Bible study I "shouldn't have been attending" were it not for a reunion in the Wal Mart cereal aisle and a generous invitation.

3) She told me from the first time we talked, she felt I was an old friend and she was honored I'd even ask her to meet with me.

4) His timing and ways are perfect. I love it. Lately He's been bringing to my attention all manner of things that are coming to pass in my life that I began praying about a while ago. He makes sure I'm aware the prayers are now answered and that it's just at the right time. And the mentoring setup is no exception. If He can and will do that....think what else He has in store! EEEEEE!!!!