Finding Community

 

It's ironic that when we went to WillowBridge to work, one of the main things we were supposed to teach our tenants was the importance of building and maintaining a community of people to share life with you...yet it's the one thing we never felt like we had the time to do for ourselves.

We did try, but for one reason or another, it just didn't work. By the time we left, we had made some friends - inside and outside of work - and had found some people to share our joys and burdens as they came, but it wasn't a true, thriving community of people.

I'm sure the definition of a community looks different for everyone, but I can tell you what it means for me:

* The people who make a place for you when you're new.

* The people you can call at inappropriate hours, when you have an emergency and need someone. Also -  the people who will call you at inappropriate hours, because they know they can trust you to pick up and not be upset.

* The people who bring food to your doorstep when you're too sick to go get your own. Also - the people who aren't afraid to tell you when they need a porch drop of their own.

* The people who remember what's happening in your life and check in on you to see how life is going - whether the day is good or hard.

* The people who say they'll pray for you - and do it.

* The people who want to hang out with you for dinner or coffee. Also - the people YOU want to hang out with for dinner or coffee.

* The people you can't wait to talk to when you have exciting news to share.

The list goes on, but you get the idea.

We've had a lot of change and limbo, even since moving to Bluffton, but the one thing that has gone better than we could have imagined? Finding community. 

* From the very moment we moved here, we had an invitation to be part of a small group, and we love those people so much. We meet up a couple of times a month, and we do everything we can to make sure nothing stands in the way of small group night. We get together for a pitch-in meal and fellowship, and it's so much fun. We have told stories, heard stories, learned things that have strengthened our faith, and celebrated milestones together. 

* From the very moment we moved here, we've had a church family and Sunday School class. They've pitched in to support Ryan in Love INC. One of them made a spot for me on her salon-client roster. They've made a place for us to sit with them in class. Three of them checked in on me last week to see how my first day of work went. They talk with us before and after church. They're family now, and though there are many of them and we're still learning names, they have blessed us more than we can say.

* Thankfully we haven't needed to call anyone at an inappropriate hour since we moved here, but we've been able to call on our new neighbors to help us with things (like house-sitting while we were gone) and we've helped them with things (like projects at their house). We text back and forth and leave gifts on each others' porches. They're not just neighbors; they're friends.

* We haven't had need of porch-drops since being here, but we have people we know we could call if we did! And we've had friends who have brought us gifts when we first moved in: treats and gift cards and all manner of welcome gifts!

* Whether church friends, small group friends, or neighborhood friends, we have found people who have called or texted just because they're thinking of us and want to know how things are going. And we've had the privilege of checking in on them, too!

* So many prayers have gone both ways between us and the friends we've made since we came here. This community is full of prayer warriors!

* Just last week, we had a dinner invitation from a couple in our church. They just wanted to get to know us, so we took dessert and they made soup, and we sat and talked for so many hours. We told stories and found commonalities and had so much fun. It felt like we had known them forever, and that was a sweet feeling.

We've missed this. It feels almost like a pre-pandemic life in the world of having people around us to share life. We are grateful for these people and we hope they have found us to be for them all the things they have been for us. 

Community can be a challenge to find. I've had so many seasons of life when it didn't come easily to me. Being vulnerable enough to find people to feel comfortable with was absolutely terrifying, and sometimes I just wouldn't do it. Sometimes I tried, and it felt like those on the other side didn't want to step into my world. But oh, what a gift it is when it comes about. True community can't be forced. It just has to be. But it requires a first step to even have a chance.

I hope you have built one. Just like we taught our tenants, it really does matter. If you haven't built one, I hope the year to come affords you opportunities to do just that!