Wednesday in the Word: Restoration

 

Sometimes the best reminders are right there in familiar verses, and we miss them, because we can’t get past the familiar.

                That’s what happened to me this week. I was reading a Facebook post, of all things, and the writing style was almost like a mini blog post. The writer talked about a season of her life when she felt depleted and she happened upon Psalm 23. She talked about the familiarity of the chapter, but how the line “He makes me lie down…” reminded her of what God wanted to do for her. I decided to go back and read the familiar words, myself, and the line that leapt out to me was “He restores my soul.”

                That’s the part I need right now.

                And I needed the reminder that restoration is HIS work in me, not my own work on myself.

                I need the restoration of confidence, where I’ve believed too many lies about who I am. I need the restoration of strength where I’ve worn myself out with striving. I need the restoration of peace, where anxiety has taken over.

                The words were right there. I know them by heart. But I hadn’t remembered them, and I hadn’t been praying them. Now I am.

                Maybe a restored soul isn’t the thing you need most right now. Maybe it’s not even anything in the entirety of Psalm 23! But I wonder if there is something meaningful hiding in plain sight in a Scripture you know? Look back over some of the ones you know the best. What do you need that’s right there in one of them?

Tuesday Tales: Date Night

 

Last Friday evening, we had a fun date night! I saw that our friend, Brent, was going to be in concert right here in our area, so we decided to go hear him!

                First, we tried out the new Culver’s that just opened on the south side of Fort Wayne. We love Culver’s, but most of our regular shopping areas don’t have one. I happened to notice this one under construction a few weeks ago, but this is the first time we’ve been!

                Shared a Mixer. 😊

                And then we went to the little church where Brent was in concert! We love his music, and whether he plays the ones we know or new ones he’s written that we haven’t heard yet, we love them all so much. This time he played a Norwegian hymn that was just beautiful. I’m going to need him to record that.

                Sam made an appearance too, and I told Ryan later that I think he loves Sam as much as the little kids do. (Ryan said I wasn’t wrong.)

                Brent was highly in demand after the concert, but he took some time to chat with us and to get a picture. Because have we even really been to a Brent concert if we haven’t gotten our picture with him??

                I think I went to my first concert of his about 22 years ago, and I love it that I get to go with Ryan now!

                (And then we went grocery shopping…because have we even gone on a date if we haven’t also gotten groceries?)

Menu Monday: Nourishing Body and Soul

 

                It’s been a couple of weeks since I cooked anything (other than scrambled eggs), but at the end of last week, I sat down to make a proper meal plan, and yesterday we had what felt like an equally proper Sunday lunch. In honor of that, I thought I’d share a recipe for the first time in forever, and after I share how it nourished the body, I’ll tell you a little story about how it nourished the soul.

Sunday Pot Roast

2 pounds Lean Chuck Roast
½ Onion (diced)
½ Pound Carrots (chopped)
1 Bag Baby Potatoes (quartered)
1 teaspoon Garlic Powder
1 teaspoon Thyme
1 teaspoon Seasoned Salt
1 ¼ cup Unsalted Beef Broth
2 teaspoons Liquid Smoke

Place roast in bottom of slow cooker. Cover with diced onion, chopped carrots, and quartered potatoes. Sprinkle garlic powder, thyme, and seasoned salt over top of vegetables. Pour beef broth over all ingredients and top with liquid smoke. Cook on low for 8 hours. Enjoy!

                When I was growing up, Mom had a rotation of meals she made on Sundays, and most of them involved a slow cooker. Our church was about a half hour drive from home, so by the time we arrived back at the house, everyone was hungry. Mom would get up early on Sundays, put meals in the slow cooker, and that made life so much happier after church.

                One of those meals? Pot roast with potatoes and carrots. I loved pot roast, though I didn’t particularly love the carrots and potatoes. I ate them because I had to, but meatatarian Bekah really was just there for the pot roast. As an adult, I’ve not made pot roast terribly often, and I’m guessing it was the disdain for the carrots and potatoes that kept me away.

                But in this season of our lives, I’m all caught up in nostalgia, and I find myself craving some of my favorite experiences of life. And one of those happens to be a nice Sunday meal. So I sat down last week and worked to find a recipe that felt like a healthier version of the pot roast I grew up with, made some adjustments, and then I came home from church and set the table like a fancy Sunday lunch deserves. And it was my favorite. (Ryan’s too!)

Here are some of the things I did that made the difference:

*I actually put this meal together super late Saturday night. Just before midnight, I assembled it all in the slow cooker and then I began the 8 hour cooking as we went to sleep. Our slow cooker (we have the gray one) has the beautiful feature of automatically switching over to warm once the cooking is done, so I knew it wouldn’t dry out or burn once it was done cooking, and I also figured the bonus time would make the meat even more tender – which was true!

*The late-night assembly made for an even easier Sunday morning, which I always celebrate. And the house smelled amazing when we woke up and when we came home from church which added to the whole nostalgia thing.

*I decided the thing I didn’t like about the potatoes and carrots when I was growing up was the size of both. Mom would quarter whole potatoes, which are still pretty big. And the carrots were pretty big, too. I don’t know if the texture or flavor got to me more, but I didn’t care for either. Choosing to quarter baby potatoes and chop baby carrots made all these issues disappear.

*Mom always made gravy to pour over the roast, which I liked on the original serving day, but I never liked it for leftovers. The texture always changed. So I skipped all gravy for ours. I just did the broth over the meat and veggies, and I didn’t miss the gravy a single bit.

*We ate ours with some homemade organic bread someone had given us after Dad died, and it reminded me of the homemade dinner rolls Mom used to make. Note to self: make a batch of dinner rolls and freeze them to thaw in small batches for Sunday lunches!

*We commissioned the cloth napkins, napkin rings, and fancy glasses, and that made it a proper Sunday lunch. Ryan lamented that we hadn’t thought to get sparkling grape juice, and I agree. We should do that at least once a month. Let’s bring back those beautiful Sunday lunches!

Sunday Scrapbook: Moments from the Week

 

                What a healing, restful week I had. (I was sad that Ryan didn’t get as much time off as I did, but I am thankful for the freedom to enjoy what I had!) I did a combination of a whole lot…and nothing at all…but here are some glimpses of the week!

Long before we knew when Dad’s last day would be, I had signed up to fill in at church while Pastor Jonathan and Julie went on fall break. God had nudged me to complete writing both my messages (I was up for today, too!) and I was so glad He did. Everything was ready. I just had to deliver it. And with the Lord’s help, I did! And as soon as we got home from church, I hit the couch for the rest of the day.

I took Monday as a full bereavement day, never getting ready at all! I spent most of the day on the couch, scrapbooking. We had such an unseasonably warm and beautiful week here in Indiana, so that evening, Ryan and I took Lexi for a long, proper walk. She loved it, and it was good for us, too! Between Dad’s illness, death, funeral things, and bad weather, we hadn’t taken a single collective walk for over a week!

Tuesday I went thrifting and found some treasures, but I also stopped to see Mom and talked her into taking a walk (well, she rode in a wheelchair and I pushed her) outside on the trails around Swiss Village. We had a great time! (And I regretted my sweater.)

I did have to work a little bit on Wednesday, so I took a trip to Fort Wayne for a hospital visit. Other than that, I spent the day deep-organizing and cleaning the house! When Ryan came home from teaching GriefShare that evening, he brought the biggest, most beautiful flower arrangement I have ever seen (or owned)! It is from one of the Sunday School classes at our church and was just amazing. I have enjoyed it to the fullest ever since!

Thursday held many beautiful moments for me – including finished up my transcription of the Gospel of Luke, a goose-bump-inducing God moment, and having our annual fall photos taken with our beloved Barb. She told us she’s retiring, and we are so sad to not get to do pictures with her anymore, but we are happy for her that she gets to start a new chapter of life! Can’t wait to see what she has come up with from behind the lens!

Our Friday night date night included a chance to see our friend, Brent Vernon, in concert – here in our own county! That was so much fun! It was great to talk to him for a little bit and enjoy his music, which we always love. He sang some new-to-us songs that we really enjoyed!

Yesterday was the last day of this restful week off, and I slept in late, did some homework, went for a walk with Ryan and Lexi, enjoyed putting together a new treasure I purchased, and we wrapped up the day with our small group friends! Thankful for this week!

Saturday Suggestions: Inspirations for Your Weekend

 

Well, my blessing-week of rest and bereavement was rudely interrupted night before last with two hours of staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night, freaking out about all the work I had not done throughout the week. Sigh. Even so, it was a good, heart-healing week for me, and I am grateful for the chance to step back and regroup. And I even got to catch up on some blogs along the way. Found some treasures for you…

You know that Ryan and I love decorating our home. But I think you know a close second (or is it really the first?) love is ORGANIZING it. And it’s not just home. We’ll organize anything we can get our hands on, really. Sarah did a post on some of her favorite organizational transformations over the past several years, and it was a joy to my heart to see so many stunning befores and afters in one single post. (You might even find an idea or two for yourself!) (I promise I’m not calling you disorganized.)

I had the best time watching this video (which is not that long – less than 20 minutes) of a home tour from right here in Indiana. The home is lovely, but it was the STORY of the home I particularly loved. First, it’s from right here in Indiana, which is fun. They never name the town, but I figured it out based on a picture of the businesses in the town, and it’s one Ryan and I have visited on a county tour. The home is SO petty, and I loved hearing the restoration story. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of anyone restoring plants at a home. The owners dug them up and farmed them out to neighbors and then brought them back when the exterior renovations were done. Fun story to hear and pretty home to see!

I always thought I loved for things to match – truly match – but somewhere along the way, I learned that what I really love is for them to coordinate well. Whether it’s the look of our home or a party theme or clothing, I have discovered coordination trumps matching for me. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone describe it better than Andrea did in this post. I have adored her home decorating style for a long time but never put together in my mind that probably the reason I love it so much is because she has mastered the art of coordination. She thrifts a lot of her pieces, so finding true matches? Not so possible. But she has some general principles that help her coordinate well, and the end result is stunning.

If panic and anxiety are part of your story, you might find some comfort in Nicole’s words. Recently in our Sunday School class, we talked about prayer and different postures of prayer – and how for many, different postures hold memories or significance. Nicole talks about one of her moments of desperate prayer and how God brought peace to her flailing heart.

I know fall is a popular time for family pictures. If you haven’t had yours taken yet this fall, you might be running out of time! (Well. If you live in Indiana, anyway.) But regardless of the season you choose for family photo shoots, take a look at Audrey’s tips for coordinating outfits. This post is not a capsule wardrobe or a specific outfit roundup. It’s just full of tips – that work in any and every season – about how to coordinate well.

Back up in number three, today, I talked about coordinating. Happily, Yvonne wrote an entire post about collecting and decorating with dishes, and she talks about collecting dishes in the colors you love. I know when we thrift, we often see one or two really pretty dishes that used to be part of a much larger collection, I’m sure. If you don’t need your dish set to match, thrifting similarly colored dishes is a great way to go! Anyway, if you don’t know what to do with your dishes, Yvonne has ideas!

Friday Fun: The Extra Gift

 

I’ve introduced you to my friend Amber, who is one of two people in my life I’ve known as a friend since story hour. It’s a rich gift to have friends who go back that far. Amber and I have kept up our friendship even though I’ve moved away (and away again and away again). We went on our first ever grown-up vacation together – to Hershey – back in our 20s. Almost a decade ago, I did a blog series called “Walk a Mile in My Shoes,” and she was one of my featured interviews, because she has an unusual occupation: she engraves monuments. (Aka tombstones.) She’s fantastic at her craft.

                Amber’s art is featured all over our home. Paintings and drawings and other creative art pieces. She is my favorite artist, and now I have two more pieces of art for my home.

                She texted me a day or so after Dad died to ask me if he had any favorite sayings or verses – or if there was a verse that was meaningful to me in this season of life.

                I joked that his favorite saying to me (at least when I was growing up) was “simmer down.” Goodness, I heard that one a lot. But I told her that the verse that had been dearest to me in this final season of Dad’s life was Psalm 46:1 – God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

                This was the verse I used to open his funeral service, and I clung to every word of it, not just that day, but in all the days around it.

                A week ago today, as Ryan and I stood in the church where Dad’s visitation was held, Ryan pointed to the door and waved. There stood Amber. She’s always supported us so well, in each death we have faced. (This goes all the way back to when I was a fifth grader, and my nephew died. Amber’s mom pulled her out of school to come support me at his visitation. I remember sobbing when I saw her because I was so happy to see a friend and so worried for her that she was missing school on my account!)

                I walked up to her and she gave me a hug and said, “I just wanted to see you. And I brought you a gift. He has it.” She pointed to the funeral director, who was busy setting up a small slab of black granite. Sweet Amber had etched my Psalm 46 verse so I could keep it forever. (Cue the tears!) This now lives in my home office and is easily a prized possession already.

                But before I even saw that gift up close, Amber reached into her pocked and pulled out a tiny piece of granite. She smiled and slipped it into my hands. “This isn’t the gift. This is just extra. Just for fun.”

                I looked down:

                Simmer down.

                This is everything. The advice I (unfortunately) still need regularly.

                This, too, is now at home in my office. Right up there on the desk where my anxious heart can see it often. (That sign around the pencil jar is also a piece of Amber art, by the way.)

                It’s the best.

Thankful Thursday: Blessings and Breathing

 

Last week I chose to work as often as I could, because it helped me to have something normal in my days. But I was given the freedom to take it easy this week if I chose, and I decided to do just that.

                I’ve had classes to tend to, and of course things have come up that couldn’t wait, so I’ve logged some hours. But I’ve tried to protect most of my days so I can rest and regroup after all the busyness that was last week…and all that has filled this whole year, really.

                So I purposed to spend the days doing things that filled my heart. (Well. My favorite heart-filling thing is spending time with Ryan. Unfortunately, he had to return to work this week. So I guess these are my next-best-heart-fillers.)

                I caught up two scrapbooks. I still have one to go, but two is a fine start, right?

                I went thrifting with nothing in particular in mind. Just went to see what I could find. Came home with some treasures, too!

                And yesterday I cleaned the entire house. I put away stacks and piles. I reorganized. I caught up on paperwork. I brainstormed. I added names to contactless numbers in my phone. All the little things that never get done…I did those things.

                And it was so wonderful.

                I’ve taken naps and long showers. I’ve cuddled with Lexi and reentered the land of cooking.

                It’s been a blessing to breathe. To exhale.

                And today I’m thankful.

Wednesday in the Word: Delight

 

Dad’s request for his funeral message was that it would focus on the Bible. So that’s what I did. From the first words of Genesis to the final words of Revelation, we took a trip through the pages of Scripture and looked at a sampling of the truths found within.

                One of the verses I read came from Psalm 1 – “but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.” I thought maybe I might share from the words of my message here:

You heard part of Dad’s story earlier when Ryan read sections of it. Dad devoted his time to many things throughout his 94 years, but one consistent use of his time was reading the Word of God.

The very first Psalm says of the blessed man, But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. And Dad did. He knew his Scripture. It was never a chore for him. It genuinely was a delight.

I’ve often said that one of the greatest gifts Dad gave me was a love for the Word of God. When I was a little girl, Dad would come to tell me goodnight and he’d sit on the edge of the bed and tell me Bible stories from memory. And he didn’t just tell the “big” ones – you know what I mean? He told the obscure ones that always get skipped over in the children’s Bible. He knew them by heart, and he told them in great detail. And he could do that because his delight had been in the Word of God. After all, there’s a lot of good stuff in there.

Part of the legacy he left to me is a love for the Word of God. And while I do not have children of my own, it is my great joy to pass along that love to those I have the privilege to serve. I know many of you in this room sat under Dad’s preaching or teaching along the way, and you know how much he would want you to know and love the Word of God. One way you can honor his life is to carry on his legacy of loving Scripture.

                My beloved Bible has been with me since the WillowBridge days, and I’ve lived in it, carried it with me everywhere, and documented my journey on its pages. I’ve copied the words from the Gospels, learned things I never saw before, and found my appetite for learning more only growing.

                I hope it will be the same for you.  

Tuesday Tales: Dad's Funeral

 

Last Friday we had Dad’s visitation and funeral all in one day – at the church Ryan and I attended when we were first married. We were trying to be respectful of Mom’s limited strength, so we had everything in one day (in that county) on Friday. It was a little over an hour’s trip for her each way, and then she was there around five hours in total. That is a lot for her without any rest in the middle.

                I’d gone to the church the night before to set up some picture tables, and I ended up hanging out to talk to the pastor for quite a while. He’s a family friend from years ago, so we had a lot to catch up on in family and ministry stories.

                The morning of the funeral, Ryan and I got ready and headed out, and I was struck with an overwhelming attack of nerves. It finally settled in that my first funeral ever was going to be my own father’s funeral, and I felt dreadfully underqualified.

                We arrived about an hour before the visitation, and we were able to see Dad. We were so pleased with how much he looked like the Dad we remembered. The parts of his appearance that had made him look so sick and frail for so long were gone, and he looked healthy and whole. And I loved the flowers for the casket. We just asked for a fall spray, and we loved what they did.

                Ryan and I cleaned up pretty well, I thought. 😉

                Mom arrived a little after we did, and she did not want to use her rollator to walk to the front, so Ryan walked her up there. She kept pausing to give herself a pep talk and eventually made it. She seemed pleased, too, with Dad’s appearance.

                There are many things I would do differently from this day if I had it to do over again, and one is everything about pictures. I didn’t have a photographer to help me, so I could only grab what I could, and we didn’t do a great job of getting group photos of the family or anything. Here’s one of me with my sisters!

                The visitation was only two hours long, and we hugged a lot of people in two hours. (Ryan and I did miss a few people who seemed to skip out of line before they got to us, but I think we saw most of them!) It was really sweet of many of our friends to come to support us!

                The funeral started at 1 p.m. My brother-in-law, Jeff, led the congregational singing and also sang a solo medley of hymns.

                Ryan read the eulogy, and I was so proud of him. He did a great job with it.

                And somehow, I got through the message. I actually made myself a collage of Ryan’s funny faces and printed it out. Whenever I started to get teary-eyed, I’d look at my funny pictures until I got back on track. Ryan told me later, “I saw you looking to the left a few times and knew you were looking at the pictures.”

                Dad wanted the message to be focused on the Bible, so that’s what I did. I hope he would have been pleased.

                All the sons-in-law, Mom and Dad’s neighbors, and Dad’s best friend were pallbearers, and we were so thankful that the rain held during the graveside portion of the service. (It was cold and windy, but the rain held.)

                Right before that service, the funeral director came up to me with wide eyes and slight panic. “Do you have a committal service?” he asked me. (He knew it was my first funeral.) I SO WISHED I would have been quick enough to wide-eye-stare him back and say, “WHAT? You didn’t tell me that!” (He has a super fun sense of humor, and I would have enjoyed watching his reaction. Dad also had a good sense of humor and would have enjoyed this banter.) Alas, I did not think of this, so I just said a lame yes and started talking. #missedopportunity.

                It was a long day, hard in its own ways, and filled with things I would have done differently if I had the chance. But it was also full of God’s grace and a lot of goodness. And for that, I’m thankful.

Menu Monday: Nourishing Body and Soul

 

This was another strange week in Shafferland…one in which I didn’t always take pictures of our meals, and sometimes I didn’t even have meals. I look forward to some kind of return to normalcy in our schedules, routines, and eating habits, for sure!

                But for today, I want to pause to say thanks to those of you who kept us fed in this strange week, where we had little time, energy, or desire to cook for ourselves.

                For the friend who showed up first thing Monday morning with a tub of chicken noodle soup and some chocolate chip cookies…thank you!

                For the friends who showed up Tuesday evening with a slow cooker of chicken and dumplings and pumpkin cookies…thank you!

                For my coworkers who surprised me with my favorite coffee…thank you!

                For the church that hosted Dad’s funeral and made sure we had cold meat, cheese, fresh veggies, cookies, and even some pie for the road…thank you!

                For our church, who sent us home yesterday with chili, cornbread, chips, and apple pie…and a gift card for later…thank you!

                For this past week and the days to come, we’re well cared-for, and we are thankful.

Sunday Scrapbook: Moments from the Week

 

What a week we had. We knew, last weekend, that we were at the end of Dad’s life. Ryan was so gracious to help me document it to the fullest, and though those are pictures that we will just keep for ourselves, I am so thankful we have each one of them.

                Last Sunday was Dad’s last birthday here on this earth. It had been his goal to make it to 94, and he did. Mom sang to him, described his gifts to him, and we had some cake (and pizza) in his honor. He hated pizza, so that part might not have been a great tribute. Anyway. It was a hard but good Sunday. I spent the whole day there in his room with him, playing music, reading Scripture, and talking to him.

                Monday morning, Dad took his last breath just after 4 a.m. Ryan came immediately to be with me and we stayed a while, and then we came home so I could get some true sleep for the first time in a couple of days. We had our meeting with the funeral home that afternoon, and it brought back such memories of our meetings for Allen and Nita several years ago.

                I ran by staff meeting on Tuesday – not for the whole meeting, but just for a bit to see my friends. Turns out they thought they might see me, so they got me coffee! Wasn’t that so sweet? I was able to take it with me to the salon for my 3-hour overhaul. It was amazing.

                Ryan and I decided to teach our midweek groups this week, just to have a moment of normalcy. When I came back to my office after teaching, these two beautiful bouquets were sitting on my desk. Oh how I love them! My people know me well.

                I decided to run to the church where the funeral would be held so I could set up some pictures and such. On my way home, I felt like having some ice cream, so I stopped at Dairy Queen and got Dad’s favorite Blizzard: Oreo!

                Friday was Dad’s visitation and funeral in their home county. The church was so kind and gracious to us, and we appreciated it. The funeral home had done a magnificent job making Dad look like the Dad we remembered, and we were so grateful. It was a joy to see so many friends, and we felt like the service went well. It was a family effort, and I think Dad would have enjoyed it.

                Yesterday we had a visitation at Swiss Village so Mom’s friends who have become her neighbors could spend some time with her. My favorite part was watching her get to sit and enjoy the picture slide show and talk about the memories with her friends! And then I came home and put my sore feet up!