Yesterday marked 130 months of marriage for us, and tomorrow
marks 11 years engaged. The October celebration week is always my favorite,
since we get to enjoy two milestones within a couple of days.
I’ve been
thinking a lot about what I love about Ryan, and we don’t have enough space in one
post to cover all the things I could say. But one thing I love about him so
much is his consistency.
He is, in many
ways, exactly the same as the man I said yes to eleven years ago. He is, in
many other ways, an even better, deeper, more well-rounded version of that man
I said yes to eleven years ago. It’s a beautiful mix, I think. On one hand, we
are always supposed to grow and change, so I am glad he’s not EXACTLY the same
as he was when we became engaged or were married. On the other hand, there is
something so comforting about consistency, so I deeply appreciate being able to
count on the man I know him to be.
Last Saturday,
when we were at the wedding, he eagerly and willingly took over documenting the
day, so I could talk to my friends. He served us (quite literally) by borrowing
the charger out from under the centerpiece and filling it with waters, teas,
and lemonades to keep all of us at the table well hydrated while we enjoyed our
snacks. This is who he is. He is the one who makes sure cups are filled and
trash is carried away.
He listened on
the drive down as I read him drafts of talks I was considering for later this
month. He gave feedback and brainstormed ideas with me. And whenever I speak,
he’s always there, making sure the technical things are tended to so I can
focus on the words that need to be shared. He’s done that from the beginning.
He talked to me
all the way home, dreaming with me about our future, immediate and distant. We
shared memories and dreams and all the conversations were safe because that’s how
he has always been. (I even talked about that in my wedding vows to him!)
When I have an
idea of something to try, he’s eager to listen, and many of those dreams have
come to fruition because of his ability to put his own creative spin on them.
He’s a prayer
warrior, good listener, wise in counsel, and drenched in the best kind of
humor. These things are just as they’ve always been – and yet they’re also better,
somehow.
Oh, how I hope
he feels he would say the same about me. Maybe not in the same details, but I
hope he sees in me a person who is consistent to the woman he proposed to
eleven years ago. I also hope he sees in me a woman who has grown and deepened
with time and experiences.
These 130
months/11 years have been a joy. Even the hard times have been more palatable
because I shared them with him.
May we never
stop being a consistent safe space for one another, and may we never stop
growing and deepening in every way.
Thank you,
Ryan, for being the husband and man you are! I love you with my whole heart,
and life here is richer because of you.
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