New Glasses

You remember when I went to the eye doctor, right? {As if you could forget.} He declared my vision perfect {which I highly suspected was the case} and told me no glasses needed.

And he's right - except when it comes to matters of attitude. And then my vision tends to be not-better-than-20/20-like-it-is-in-real-life.

So here's my story/confession/recommendation for today. Got a minute?

If you've been around the blog for any length of time, you know that for the last four or five years, this little house of mine {and now ours} has gone on and off the market a handful of times. It started when I got my job in Fort Wayne in 2011, and my plan was to leave this town entirely and start over with a new life up there. So on the market it went. And stayed. And didn't sell.

Then I started dating this guy named Ryan...and we decided to get married, and we decided we couldn't handle merging lives and selling a house all at once, so we took it off the market. And then after putting some work into it, we put it back on. And it didn't sell again, so we took it back off...and so the story goes. On and off, on and off.

Most recently, we had hoped to sell it and move closer to Ryan's work to knock out his commute as well {we really didn't mean to sign up to be life-long commuters}. But it seemed like the lack of interest in our home was even more pronounced than ever before, even though the price was also lower than ever before, and the amount of work put into the house was more than ever. With that, we decided God must be purposefully blocking the sale of the house, which wasn't something we hated, necessarily. We had prayed many times for God to protect the house from selling if we aren't supposed to move. You can't ask that and then be mad when He does it, right?

But despite all that, I've been cranky about this house. I wanted to move. I wanted a new start somewhere else in a place that had always and only been uniquely ours as Shaffers. I had a huge list of things I wanted in a new house, which essentially made me side with all the people who had walked through our house and declared it cute...but not for them.

I began to suspect that even if God DID have a plan to sell this house eventually, He would not do so until I got my attitude whipped into shape, so I even went so far as to ask for prayer in our Sunday School class...prayer for a changed vision toward this house...this house that truly is warm, lovely, and full of beautiful memories.

I needed house glasses.

Last week, as I sat curled up reading a novel, I suddenly {which means it was a God-prompt} remembered a book sitting on my office shelf...one I've had for probably a year and never read. The Nesting Place by Myquillyn Smith. {She blogs as The Nester if this sounds vaguely familiar to you but you can't quite pinpoint why.}

Lynne interviewed Myquillyn about this book when it came out, and we happened to have an extra copy at the station, so Lynne offered it to me, knowing how much I love home decor and such. I gratefully accepted the book, but ever had time to read it. Until that day last week.

I put down the novel, retrieved the book and read it in 24 hours flat. And with each page I turned, I realized for me, this book was an eye exam and pair of house-glasses all in one paper appointment. I gulped at sentences like "Do you believe it's possible to love where you are, right now, today?" and "I trust that even though this might not be the exact home I'd choose, God chose it for me, and it is home."

And then...the surge of hope. "Giving up is the first step to creating the home you love," she said. "What if you already have everything you need to have the home you always wanted?"

I began to glance around our home. Did I? Did I already have it all and I just couldn't see it?

Yes, I did.

"The best way to start creating a beautiful home is by being grateful for what you already have," she said. Ouch. I have much to be grateful for, and I am grateful on some levels. Just wasn't grateful on enough of them.


"The real question is, What am I doing with what I've been given?" Largely complaining about it, unfortunately.

"I had been so foolish and wasteful. I finally came to terms with our shaky, we-have-no-idea-what-will-happen-next-week livelihood. I decided to trust that the God who is in charge of my eternal life could also be trusted with my everyday life." Yes. This. This is where I needed to be.

I closed the book with a sigh of relief and walked around my truly beautiful home and started to look at the blessings in the imperfections {lovely limitations, Myquillyn calls them} in each room. So the floor plan isn't so 2015. It's working just fine for the two of us, and Braeya doesn't get a vote. So the kitchen is small. Aren't tiny homes with tiny kitchens the new trend? On and on I went, finding the lovely in the limitations.

I sure am grateful Myquillyn Smith wrote The Nesting Place, and if you have some vision problems with your own home, you should give the book a read...it might just be the eye exam you need, too. I'm glad she willingly shared her own journey through 13 homes in 18 years of marriage, some of them dreadful and some of them spectacular. {The homes, not the years of marriage.} I'm glad she could point out the lovely in the sometimes EXTREME limitations.

And I'm grateful for my new prescription to see this home in its full spectrum of beauty.

The Shafferland Shuffle

* Had a fun treat last Sunday afternoon! My college roommate, Jenny, happened to be in town with her husband and kiddos, and we met up for lunch! I haven't seen her in three years...she'd never met Ryan, and I hadn't met her littlest son, so it was a great opportunity to catch up! After lunch, Ryan and I did a little shopping, which resulted in my fun new coffee shirt - YAY! And that night, we cuddled up on the couch to watch TV and eat snacks. Shout out to Ryan for cutting up all the fruit so we could have a HEALTHY snack!

* Monday I finished a writing assignment for church, and I was excited with the way it turned out. {Hope they agree!} I celebrated by making my first ever batch of homemade donuts...pumpkin treats that Ryan loved! We had to go to Wal-Mart that night {you know what that does to my nerves} - and the employees had to help us shop, because huge chunks of it were roped off for new flooring. I thought it kind of looked like a skating rink! Something for the kids to do while parents shop, perhaps?

* Tuesday morning, I met my friend Trudy for breakfast at IHOP, and we caught up over a short stack of pancakes. Ryan and I went for a run that night - and I actually had one of my best runs in this round of training! {Easier to do that when I'm only going 2 miles, right?} And we kept our end of town classy with our bedding giraffe in the backyard...ohhhh Shaffers. Actually I thought this was a pretty clever clothesline Ryan made!

* Wednesday's run was a bit tougher, but I appreciated the stunning flowers along the path! If you have to pant your way through a run, might as well have pretty things to look at! We watched America's Got Talent {anyone else watching this?} and Ryan was relieved that the Professional Regurgitator made it through. I wish I could say I'm kidding about his obsession with that guy's talent. He freaks me out!!! And because he doesn't love to sit and rest after a long day at work, Ryan threw a paint-patching and couch scotch-guarding party that night! So motivated, this handsome husband of mine!

* Thursday was a hard day for me - so many things marinating in my head, which resulted in a few good meltdowns into my journal, but I'm so thankful to have the time and freedom to process days like that on the spot! AND - my friend Faith invited me to lunch at the last minute, which was a welcomed blessing. I think it was good for me to get out of the house and away from my own thoughts for a while. You know what else made the day all better? We got to visit our friends Nate and Jenna, who just had a darling baby girl! We took dinner, we loved on the baby, we chatted with our friends, we gave them gifts...it was so comforting!! Thankful for that evening.

* Friday I had a marathon reading session and finished two books while Ryan was at work. I didn't even know I could do that! It didn't impress Braeya, who slept through the whole thing. I did some writing, too, and right when Ryan got home, we had the fun surprise of seeing our friends Matt and Angela! They recently moved out of town but were unexpectedly visiting and stopped by to see us for a while! We had great laughs and it was so good to see them...and then they left. :( We spent the rest of the night curled up on Mo watching old episodes of Criminal Minds until we fell asleep {to interesting dreams}!!

* Yesterday Ryan worked a very long day, and while he was gone, I had a surprise visit from one of my old co-workers and his wife! We had fun catching up - and I had fun watching movies and writing for the rest of the day. Ryan and I went for a run in this CRAZY humidity, which made my KNEES sweat! We felt the only proper recovery was to get frappes. Fruit ones - serving of fruit, right???

The Saturday Six

One.

Source

Maybe I'm the last to know {because that's not unusual!} but have you all heard of this place in Cincinnati? It's called Bargains and Buyouts - and it sounds like a place Ryan and I need to visit! {Not as much because we need anything but more because it just looks FUN!!!} I realize my version of "bargain" and the average person's version of "bargain" might not match - I confess to choking a bit on a couple of the prices she quoted. My version of bargain is much more garage sale. But this STILL looks really fun!

Two.

Source

Oh. But. Yes. I've told you before that I do my level best to keep from morphing into a blog with words that stir the pot. And I could probably write a blog post about why I feel that way, but I see no need, because Shauna Niequist already wrote it and said it better than I ever could. This. This. This. {Granted I've not had to deal with what she has in what has been said about her or her family online - that I have found, anyway - but the general principle. Oh yes.}

Three.

Source

Found this gem of a blog this week...when scouting around Pinterest for some capsule wardrobe ideas. I love this blogger's approach and I love it that she's a real person living a real life, which makes it easier to apply her principles to my life. I may or may not have spent several hours on her blog this past week. Judge if you like.  

Four.

Source

The words of this post by Kelly Minter are for every one of you out there...but I want to add that for those of you who are single and struggling today with what kind of impact you can have on those who come behind...because you might not have anyone of your own coming behind...read this. Read this and know that your life matters because all of us have people watching and shaping their own lives after what they see us do. Leave a legacy.  

Five.

Source

While my selfish prayer would always be that we don't have to know this kind of love in its practicality, I type this sentence assured that if we did, Ryan would love me as Jason Tippetts loved Kara. These men get what it means to love as Christ loves the church. If you can read through this post, get to the part where the mom tells her daughter the true stuff of marriage, and not cry, then you're doing better than I did.  

Six.

I signed up to review Ginger Kolbaba's book Your Best Happily Ever After, because I thought it was going to be a book about marriage, and I'm always up for new insights on making our relationship the best it can be. I plowed eagerly into this adorable little book with aesthetically torn edges, pen in hand and ready to learn...and I turned the last page so very sad and disappointed that I hadn't liked it.


It pains me to even write those words, because as a writer, I want to believe in the good of other writers out there. I want us all to be great every time and get the message of hope out there to hungry readers, and I know even as I write this, Ginger will probably see it in some forum, and I don't want to be the reviewer that didn't like her book and ruins her day. But I promised an honest review in exchange for the book when Barbour sent it, so I have to be honest, even though it's the last thing I want to do today.

The book did have some good points. Some things I underlined, even. And she had an entire chapter on keeping the Sabbath holy and recognizing it as a set apart day for rest, which is a topic I'm passionate about and think more people should research. So for those things, I was thankful.

But the book on the whole confused me, which is something I hardly ever experience as a reader. It started with my misunderstanding that the book would be about marriage, but ended up being about the broader life with some marriage thoughts sprinkled in. Her premise combined the familiar stories of fairy tales, the familiar accounts of Scripture, and tales from her own life and the lives of those she knew. And while I enjoyed each facet on its own, the combining of them didn't go smoothly for me. I felt like I hopped from fairy tale to Bible account to real-life story and back again in no particular order and with no transitional warning. It frustrated me and had I not promised to review the book, I probably would not have even read to the end.

While she incorporated conversational language and humor, sometimes it came off to me as flippant, which I choose to believe with all my heart she didn't mean to do, but that's how it read to me. There was also a part of me that struggled with dissecting fairy tales and Scripture in the same spot...I couldn't quite pin-point the issue in my heart over it, but I felt a bit unnerved lining up true accounts from the inerrant Word of God with fairy tales made by man. I can't fully explain it.

At the very end, in the acknowledgements, she said the concept for this book had been birthed out of some speaking she did at a retreat. Once I read that, the anecdotal feel of the book made more sense to me, but I wish that in the final product, the flow would have been more natural and less choppy.

I'm so sorry I didn't love this book. I wanted to...I really did. It seems from other reviews I read online that I stand alone in this feeling, which makes me question myself and simultaneously very happy for the author, knowing so many other reviewers did love this book. Sigh. Honest reviewer sadly signing off for this week.

Pull Up a Chair...Let's Chat

I was going to save this whole idea for next week, but it's burning in my mind so much, I decided not to wait. And although this post has to do with writing, please translate it in your mind to fit YOU.

Earlier this week, one of my writer friends posted to Facebook that she'd just learned her book was about to be backlisted {which in short, means her publisher pushed it down the food chain just a bit, in favor of newer titles}. You can still buy the book {and you should!! Go here!} but the publisher isn't pushing it anymore. That's not fun news to hear as an author.

While she wrestled with the legitimate sadness that her book...her literary baby...had been pushed to the back of the line, my inner fire reignited about this whole marketing thing. I really do get it. Publishing companies have to make money, and in this world of give me more, give me better, give me new, make it happen faster, they have no business-sense choice but to satisfy the cravings of their readers if they want to stay in business. I get it!

But here's my struggle: those of us who have words to share are forced to make a choice between being popular right now so we can make it to the front of the line or being obedient right now so we can do what the Lord has placed on our hearts.

And yesterday, I sat at my desk in my home office and pounded my fist in support of this article by Terry Burns, an author who has chosen to write in obedience rather than to write for the New York Times best seller list. He writes even if only a handful read his words. He writes knowing that impacting the eternity of a few is more important than impacting the temporary of many.

Yes. Just YES.

In his post, Terry asked what defined success? Is it found in how high the book climbs in a list of titles? Is it found in the number of sales? Is it found in the number of times the book reaches the hands of those God intended it for?


Just for fun, I went to the CBD website and looked through their bestsellers on marriage. Five pages of books. Five pages of very recognizable titles and acclaimed authors. {And rightfully so, I might add.} Five pages of books filled with excellent wisdom. Five pages of books that have helped many.

Do you know what I didn't find on any of those five pages? My favorite marriage book. The one I read when I was single and the one filled with wisdom that has served me more fully in this new marriage of mine than any other book I've read. And I've read many.

The book, Married Lovers, Married Friends by Steve and Annie Chapman, was written in 1999, and it's hard to even find for purchase online. But my goodness...I sure am glad they put forth the effort to write it, because it makes a difference every day in my marriage. Every. Day.

That book was a wild success for me. It shaped me as I prayed for a husband. It shaped me as I dated my husband. And it shapes me now as a wife. I don't care how far down a list it is for marketing purposes. The marriage of Ryan and Bekah Shaffer is what it is today - in part - because of that book. To me, for us, it's a bestseller.

Writers want their word-babies to be loved just like moms want their child-babies to be loved. There's no shame in that. I sit at my desk almost every day, writing, editing, researching, dreaming, shaping, forming...and I want those words to reach far, because I want them to matter to others like they matter to me. But truly, even more deeply than that, I want them to reach the souls God needs them to reach.

He said for us to go and make disciples. We do it in different ways...words are my way. But the command is to make disciples. It says nothing of making the MOST disciples. It's not a competition to Him. And I need to make sure it's not one to me.

I ache to be an obedient writer. To trust Him to slip my words in front of those who need to read them and to equally trust that those who don't see them...don't need them.

Success doesn't come from having a bestseller. {And that's not just something non-bestselling authors say. It's true.} Success comes from hearing Well done, good and faithful servant. I want to do well with my words and trust Him to arrange the recipients.

Learning in Training #5

We are just about six weeks away from the Haiti Half {which is now a Haiti 5K}. If you missed that news last week, the update is that they had to drop the actual half marathon for this year, because they didn't have enough registrations, but they're going forward with the 5K walk/run, so if you've always wanted to try a 5K, it's not too late!! We'd love to have you come hang out with us and be part of the race!

For now, despite the change in race distance, we are still training for the half. I am not sure if we will continue that clear to the end or if we'll decide our bodies are better served to train for the race we'll actually run. But for now we're running as if the half really is in our future. And last week was our fifth week of training.

For the first time in our training, we had to adjust the schedule because of a night of fierce rain. So grateful the training has fallen in the {relatively} dry half of the summer.

It was a more pleasing weather week, which made for "easier" running...though this is still far from easy for me. And on the very last day, with the longest run, I struggled with acid reflux, which something I never have, but it is not fun on the run, let me tell you!

As I ran, I focused on this verse:

On hearing this, Jesus said,

"It is not the healthy who need a doctor,

but the sick."
Matthew 9:12

Kind of a random verse, but it kept coming to mind as I ran that week...that the point of this race is to raise money for the sick. And I tried to envision them as I ran. In fact, as I ran the longest, hardest run on Saturday, I got a text from one of my friends...her brother-in-law had been taken to the hospital. They discovered a brain tumor, and as I ran, I prayed for this friend here, stateside, and knew he represented so many more seeking treatment in Haiti.

I wondered what it would have looked like if he would have had to walk to the hospital, his side numb from the tumor pressing in, his eyes squinting from the brightness of the sun. I wondered what would have happened if he made it there, finally, and they told him he needed a bigger, better hospital {like they told him at the hospital here}. Is there even a bigger, better hospital there? Is there a way to get there? 

I ran with his face in my mind, that last run, knowing he represented a nation of people I've never met. People who deserve the same chance he received. 

The sick need a doctor, yes. And their sick need them as much as our sick. So I pushed through my run, even as my throat burned and my legs screamed. I ran thankful to have a chance to run for this group that reaches out to the sick to help them find doctors. 

Other posts on this subject:

The Haiti Half

Learning in Training #1

Learning in Training #2

Learning in Training #3

Learning in Training #4

Seventh Grade

I cracked up in my coffee yesterday reading Melanie Shankle's post about her daughter's first day of seventh grade. There are so many funny lines in that post that I won't bother quoting them all and instead, I'll tell you to just go read the thing for yourself.

Melanie lamented her own unfortunate haircut in her seventh grade year. And she's just a bit older than I am, so the photo she so bravely shared matches hair many of my classmates sported in middle to upper elementary.

By the time I got to seventh grade, poofs and perms were all the rage.

I'm not sure what seventh grade looked like in your school system, but in ours, it was the year you fell to the bottom of the seniority totem pole once again. Sixth grade found you at the cool end of the school hall, able to reach the top of the short lockers with no issue, and every single soul in that school completely beneath you in the social spectrum. You ruled the playground, the lunch room, and pretty  much everything in between.

And then came seventh grade, where playgrounds became extinct, lockers grew another foot or two, and you were suddenly the uncoolest of the uncool, wrestling your combination lock and debating which reprimand to swallow: running in the hall to beat the five minute passing period or sliding into your seat after the tardy bell rang. You had to tote your books to class and take all of them home at the end of the day to pilfer through the mound of homework demanded.

So it was understandably rough to take your place at the bottom of the totem pole and get up in time every day to curl those poofy bangs and shellac them in Rave 4 hairspray.

I have a sampling of my own seventh grade year that I'm sure I'll later regret posting on the internet.

Not surprisingly, I enjoyed food. Apparently a LOT.

Sometimes the poof works against you because when you pull the rest of your unruly hair back, the poof is ALL you can see, giving you kinship with the children of the Cabbage Patch. {And a special shout out to the neon shirt and the plaid shorts. Oh Ryan. Why didn't you love me then? I just don't understand!!!}

Speaking of neon - there were also the neon sunglasses. Groovy.

That hair! Flat irons hadn't been invented yet, my hair was too thick for most ponytail holders to corral it, and it had a wave all its own. It was down to my waist and just a mess. A thick, unruly, wavy, tangled mess.

Seventh graders, you've come a long way from the days of yore, when seventh graders were plagued with poofy bangs, unruly hair, neon shirts and the makings of a unibrow. We weren't poised like you are today with your miniature model clothing and your corralled tresses.

Seventh grade is still yucky, I'm sure. I know you couldn't pay me to return to it. But surely you're a step ahead of where we were. You probably don't even have to remember a combination. What is it now? Thumbprint recognition?

Bekah and the Graphic Tees

A few weeks back, I told you how I went through my entire wardrobe and cleaned the thing out in such a way that even the closet never saw it coming. {Those conversations here, here, and here.} I was ruthless. Several of you told me you wanted to know how this capsule project progressed, and I wanted to come back to you with the first of the updates. {If you're a really fabulous style person, please find grace for me, because I'm certainly no professional at this!}

First of all, let me say that in the grand scheme of the wardrobe, I do not miss the clothes I weeded out. In fact, I sat around last night trying to remember some of the clothes I'd ditched, and I couldn't even mentally conjure up images of them, so I really must not miss them. And while it is true that there are days when my all-day outfit comes from the workout pile, thanks to the promise of an evening workout and the reality of a whole day at home with no visitors or appointments, I really do try to put myself together on most days, so I really have lived with this capsule for a while.

My goal in the initial weeding was to make a capsule from clothes I already owned without purchasing a whole bunch of new stuff. And for the most part, I've done that. But I'm also learning what works and what would work better so I can keep my eye out for new staples to replace what I have, as necessary and as affordable.

For reasons that I neither know nor understand, I had this weird need to make a line of graphic tees my first wardrobe fix. I'm not even sure I knew what a graphic tee was prior to this adventure, but all of the sudden, I was aware and compelled to make a good graphic tee mini-collection the basis of this project. {?????}

If you're not even sure what a graphic tee is, this site had a pretty helpful background on it, but the bottom line is that it's a t-shirt with some sort of writing or logo {or both!} on it...and contrary to what you might initially think when you hear the word graphic, it most certainly does not have to have anything of ill report on it.

I think the idea of the graphic tee appealed to me because thank-you-Pinterest, you can wear it several different ways, layering it with all kinds of stuff and making it pretty versatile. Knowing it was the kind of shirt I could dress up, dress down, wear on a date, wear at home, wear shopping, wear for get-togethers, wear for writing days...made it appealing. And my goal was to have three graphic tees in my capsule. {I'm also fixated on three's for my capsule...no idea why.}

In the initial cleanout, these were the three I kept from my overflowing closet.

And pretty quickly, I decided the two sports-looking shirts were not going to work. They were too bold, too colorful, too pigeon-holed, and at least for me, too hard to mix and match with other things. Plus, they were too alike to make the capsule diverse. Lastly, they're pretty short, as you can see from the comparison with the shirt in the middle, limiting the number of things I could pair them with and have them look good on me. {Confessions of the girl whose main problem area is her belly.}

So....I went on a hunt for two shirts to replace the red and blue that are about to get kicked from the capsule, and I'm pleased to say...I found them! So today I want to tell you about the three tees, and then once I learn to style them better, I'll show you how that part works for me.

One.

This is the only shirt in the graphic tee collection that stayed from before. I bought it in 2009, when I went on my first grown-up-girl vacation, destination: Hershey, Pennsylvania. I felt the trip deserved preservation in the form of a souvenir shirt, and I wanted one that looked different from your typical "I went on vacation and found this shirt" shirt. So this one came from the gift shop in Hershey, and is either a junior's shirt or a very unfortunately-sized adult's shirt, because the tag says XL, but it fits like something between a medium and a large. {Pausing for the reminder that tags do not define the size of the person wearing the shirt.}


Per the grand world of the internet, this shirt is now out of stock {what?? They don't make the same shirt from 2009?} but apparently I paid in the realm of $20.00 for it. That is more than I would EVER pay for a shirt, but it was a souvenir, so it gets pricing grace for that. And if I've been wearing it since 2009, I would say I easily have gotten $20.00 of wear out of it, therefore making it a great buy.

This shirt made the capsule cut in part because I already owned it, making the entry fee into the capsule ZERO DOLLARS. I also love its color...a chocolate brown {of course} with burgundy and pink writing, making it tastefully colorful, without being obnoxious like the red and blue shirts of the initial cut. Brown is a good neutral for me, so I really wanted a brown shirt in the graphic tee section of my capsule. And despite the XL on the tag, I love the way this shirt fits, I love that it's long, and I love that it has pink edging around the collar, sleeves, and bottom, giving a finished, polished look without actually layering {and therefore adding heat}. And it satisfied one of the main elements of capsule rules: it really captures who I am. I love chocolate and everyone knows that, so this is a good representation of me! Bonus: It has held up well in the last six years, making it quality {shout-out to the maker, Bella, for excellent construction!}, and I am glad I chose to keep it in my capsule.

Two.

This shirt was the first purchase I made post-capsule, and I am glad I did it. I found it one day while shopping through a killer DaySpring sale...and that day the shirt was only $5.00. {It is now back to its regular price of $28.00, but you can still purchase it.} DaySpring offers free shipping on orders over $50.00, and since I was buying up gifts on the clearance sale that day, I made it to $50.00 pretty easily, making this shirt's entry fee into the capsule a true FIVE DOLLARS.

Buying online makes me so nervous {when it comes to clothing, that is} because I am such a weird shape and really need to try things on. I read all the reviews on the shirt and still came away conflicted, because some shoppers said this shirt really was a junior's shirt {as the site indicates} and you needed to buy bigger to be safe, and others said they bought their normal adult size and were fine! What should the slightly chubby girl do??? In the end, I bought a large {I would normally buy a medium in the shirt department} and crossed my fingers. It does fit, but  because of the cut, it is pretty form fitting, so a medium would have been too small for me. Having said that, I do love the form-fit, because it actually has shape and doesn't just hang on me like a sack.

I love the fabric of this shirt, because it really does feel like my jammies. I love the dark charcoal color, I love the scoop neck, I love the long length, and I love that it has a chalkboard look to it. You know how dearly I love my chalkboards. I really wanted a black/dark gray shirt in the capsule, and this fit the bill. BONUS: a portion of the proceeds of the shirt support a great cause...the Mercy House in Kenya. I guess because I got such a great sale price, my portion wasn't that big, but still. I love something with a good cause attached. {And the message is really good too...I just need to remember it when I wear it to the grocery store and get cranky!}

Three.

And just this past weekend, I found the third perfect graphic tee for my "rule of thirds" capsule collection. Ryan and I were just winding our way through Kohl's, for funsies, and what should my wandering eye discover way up high on the wall? This shirt. {Note: if you click that link, there are several different messages on this style of shirt, so you can click through to find mine or one you like better!} I mentioned to Ryan that really, no shirt could be more perfect for me, and while I was trying on something else, he fished this shirt down off the wall, and after feeling the fabric, insisted I try it on.


Twist my arm.

This shirt REALLY feels like jammies. I mean really. And I may have worn it two days in a row while writing - judge if you like. It's got a fun flowing shape to it, scooping longer down in the front, which is happiness for tummy-trouble folks like me. It's soft and I love the V-neck, since that's different from the other shirts in this portion of the capsule. The medium was the winner for me with this shirt {made by Apt. 9}, fitting just the way a medium should on me. I love that it's light gray in color, which also makes it different from my other graphic tees. And the message: well, obviously.

The shirt, per the website is $26.00, which means I would never pay full price for it. But it was on sale for $14.99 this weekend, and we had coupons and specials in addition, making its final entry fee into the capsule a whopping NINE DOLLARS.

So. The recap:

Three graphic tees for the capsule wardrobe: check.
Total cost for said tees, combined - at this point in the game: $14.00. 
Size breakdown: extra-large, large, and medium.
Color base for capsule: brown, dark charcoal, light gray.
Bekah: very happy.

Writing

It's been right at two months now since I walked out of the station for the last time {as the Mid-Morning producer, anyway}. I'm still on my fourth tank of gas since leaving, which in days of yore, was something that happened about every seven days. Is it weird that I have measured a piece of life in gas tanks?

People ask how I'm liking this new season, and I tell them I can't possibly love it enough. It's a grace, a gift, and absolutely right. {And who knows - it could change again, but for now, it's where I'm called to be.}

I came into this season with two goals: to be a wife and to write. Wifing it is going well, and hopefully Ryan would agree. It's a blessing to spend my days taking care of our home so we don't have to spend our evenings rushing through loads of laundry, washing dishes, and blowing thick layers of dust off the furniture. It's been a relief to go through every corner of the house and clean out the excess we don't need. It's been a joy to make meals and have them ready for our dinner when Ryan comes home. All those tangible things allow me {allow both of us, really} the luxury of having more time to just be when the day ends.

As for writing...well, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do when I had the time to do it. Or perhaps I should say I wasn't sure what God wanted me to do.

Of course the blog takes part of my writing time, and it's so nice to be able to do that during the day as well, while Ryan works, so I don't have to delay our time together in the evening to blog. And I've had the opportunity to write more for the Broken, Beautiful, Bold blog, which has been great accountability. I've even been doing a bit of writing for a project at our church, and I'm grateful for that.

As I prayed about a project for myself, God led me quickly and unmistakably to one that has been germinating in my heart for years, and now is pushing down small roots. It's still very, very raw and I'll tell you more about it later when I have something to tell.

Meanwhile, there was this one other project, one that I actually started back when I still worked full time. I didn't have an intent for it, really, other than to do it. But this past week, the full labor pains kicked in and I birthed thousands of words in one week.

It's the story of us.

A memoir, you could say, of our first year of marriage. Shafferland, Season One with all its comedy, all its drama, and all its lessons.

Much work remains to be done on the many pages that poured from my mind onto screen. Much editing, refining, reliving, rewording. It's not finished, but it is done. The story is down, in its Notebookness.{That was one of the main reasons I wanted to write it: if we got all Notebookey and forgot our story, I wanted to have it preserved.}

I laughed and cried at our own history as I wrote. Beautiful memories, frustrating memories, funny memories...they all evoked such emotion in me that sometimes I had to pause just to gather myself again.

My journals, scrapbooks, and blog posts were all strewn about as I pieced together our story into one place...and as I wrote, I saw something I hadn't remembered. It was in that first year that God began to stir my heart about being a wife and writer. I looked at my heart wrestlings on paper...words of conflict between how much I loved my job and how much I wanted to devote to my marriage. It was a tug-of-war that lasted, according to my journal, two years from the first inkling to the final goodbye.

What a beautiful blessing to sit on the other side of that answer and see the moment of its conception. I hadn't expected it, but I gave thanks in it.

And with the final keystroke of the draft...I cried. I cried because it was my first completion in this season. My first big project - regardless of how far it goes outside our own home - is done. I stand two months into a new life chapter with a completed work in my hand. Perhaps the largest completed work I've written.

I celebrate it. And I wanted to celebrate it with you. For many of the words I'd written here to you about our love, our life, and our lessons found their way into that project. Thank you for being a welcoming place for me to share my thoughts every day. You help me preserve our story in the tiniest of bits every day.

Season One: documented. I look forward to the days of editing, refining, and moving on to write about season two!

The Shafferland Shuffle

* Last Sunday, we came home from church and took a two hour nap before we even got around to making lunch! Now THAT is a day of rest. I tried a new Pinterest recipe of chicken fried rice, and we declared it a keeper! Ryan got his feet wet in a new season of football with the Colts/Eagles game, and we spent the rest of the day on Mo, breaking our date with him briefly enough to pick up a pizza and catch a stunning sunset.

* Monday I had an eye doctor appointment in Kokomo, which meant that duh, I needed to go early and have lunch with Ryan! That was a treat! And then...it was time for the eye doctor. You already read about that adventure...but it was certainly an interesting afternoon! My first visit to the eye doctor - ever in life. We got a HUGE thunderstorm right when Ryan got home, so that was all the permission we needed to rest for the evening!!

* Tuesday morning, my friend Marie came over to spend some time with me...and she brought me a chocolate chip frappe! YAY! She sells Mary Kay, and I was a face model for some of the new fall colors, so I got to play with makeup all morning, which made it a great day. I got so busy writing that afternoon that I even forgot to breathe, making the subsequent four mile run very interesting. I did squeeze in time to make homemade lasagna, and we ate in the pirogi, since it was such a beautiful night.

* Wednesday was another busy writing day for me - I actually spent most of this WEEK busy writing. Excited to tell you more about that. Braeya always sits with me in the office and sleeps in moral support - waking up to sniff coffee or lick leftover food from plates. Ryan wanted to work a bit more on the garage that night and I sorted through some more boxes from my childhood. Found the dress I was dedicated in. Don't think it fits anymore.

* Thursday, Ryan sent me this picture from work. One of his patents drove this motorcycle, and Ryan wanted to sit on it. LOL!! Hope he enjoyed it - no motorcycles in Shafferland. I FINISHED the big writing project I'd been working on {the draft of it anyway}, and we went for a run that night. Ryan wanted me to see my form, so he sneaked a picture of me from a distance when I didn't know he was watching!

* Friday I spent a long time in prayer and with my journal - God certainly seems to have a lot to chat about with me right now! I'm thankful for the time to do that. Braeya and I waited for my parents to arrive, becasue they'd been away to Shipshewana for their anniversary and brought home Rise n Roll donuts for us!!!! I was mildly excited. :) Ryan did garage work that night, rotating tires, changing oil...and I sat in a lawn chair beside him, reading while he worked.

* We had plans yesterday to do a county date, but we had too much to do and we knew it would just be stressful to try to finish our chores and do an all-day date. So we worked hard, had a little fun with some shopping, and at the end of the day, went for a six mile run that I thought might kill me. But it didn't!! We were so glad we had not tried to do it all. No need to be heroes.

Linking up with The Good, The Random, The Fun!

The Saturday Six

One.

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Are you a bit of a worry-wart? I have no idea what you're going through, then. KIDDING, of course! I can fight the best of you for the worrier #1 prize. So if you're in the running for that medal with me, you should read this post by Lisa-Jo Baker. Good, true words.

Two.

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One of my favorite things to do on Sunday afternoons is peruse Pinterest. Sometimes I'll look for something specific, and sometimes I just play around. Last Sunday I ended up scrolling through this ultra-cute blog, written by a woman who loves vintage pieces. Though my heart doesn't bend toward the vintage for my every-day style, I adore her home and collections. It's classy and tastefully done!

Three.

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Several of you commented or contacted me back when I talked about going through my closet and going to more of a capsule mindset. While we're not going through and getting rid of everything we own, I have decided I am a fan of getting rid of clutter. One of my Facebook friends linked this past week to a post from this blog...and I ended up scrolling through pages and pages. I like this blogger because her approach is not condemning at all. She shares what she does, but she understands each person's life and needs will look differently. But if you're interested in paring down, you can find a bunch of good ideas here!

Four.

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Have you ever done a color run? I haven't, but I actually think it would be fun! Brittany wrote this blog post with some helpful tips about a color run...and I wouldn't have thought of a few of them. Check them out! 

Five.

I loved this post so very much...written by a new friend of mine, Kristen Entwistle. She NAILS some of the very thoughts and feelings I had when I was single, and whether you are single or have single friends in your life, you should read her insights here. I love a post that may not leave you with answers, but it certainly leaves you knowing you're not alone on the path. Well done, Kristen. 


Six.

As I've plunged into the world of reading voraciously again, I've been doing my best to branch out a bit...to try reading some things I might not ordinarily choose. Enter the memoir, 'Til We Meet Again by Ray and Betty Whipps with Craig Borlase.


The subtitle introduces the book as a memoir of love and war, and while I'm always eager to pick up a book about love, I'm not quite as quick to read about war. But if you're not great at history, like me, and you want to trick yourself into learning more about it, read a love story set decades ago, and you'll accidentally learn some history as you soak up a love story. Ray and Betty will celebrate their seventieth wedding anniversary next month, and their love story began on the front lines of World War II.

In truth, the bulk of the book is the story of Ray's time in the military, and the love story part slides in closer to the end than I anticipated, but even with that, you can't help but root for the love of Ray and Betty after you spend the first half of the book learning about the kind of God-honoring man Ray is. He served as an infantryman in Normandy, Belgium, and Paris, and Betty was a field nurse in France. "The good wound," as Ray later named it, sent him to France and during his month-long stay in a military tent hospital, he met a beautiful nurse named Betty and fell in love with her, even though their differences in rank made such a situation risky.

Though he was subsequently captured as prisoner of war, his desire to return home to marry Betty Carter helped him push through the weeks of debilitating malnutrition, torturous labor, and flea infestations. And during that time, his faith grew and firmed exponentially. Even in a POW camp, without a Bible to hold and read, he recounted verses he'd memorized and specific examples from his own life when things COULD have happened differently or even SHOULD have happened differently...but God.

The book is well-written and truly does have a fiction feel to it. Though I've never met Ray and Betty Whipps, reading their story bolstered my faith, and I feel honored to have been introduced to a couple who put the Lord first always...even in the moments that are a version of hard I've never seen {and pray I never have to}.

The story is easy to read, honest in its war details without being too graphic, and saturated in the faith and message of Jesus. Thank you, Ray and Betty, for sharing your story and your faith. And thank you, Tyndale, for providing a copy of the book for me to read and review.

Learning in Training #4

Four weeks of training for the Haiti Half are now under my belt. {So to speak. Please rest assured I do not actually WEAR a belt while training - or at any other time in life.}

It was during this fourth week of training that I learned the news that the half marathon won't actually happen this year. The event organizers said the registrations were too low to make the half happen. There will still be a 5K race on the appointed day, and Ryan and I are still going to run - and we'll be done SO much sooner than we would have been! {And my body will be so grateful.}

I was sad when I first read the news, because I had been so committed to pushing toward this goal. But even in the sadness, I turned to Ryan and said, "I'm still going to train for the half."

He raised an eyebrow and said "Even on the day you have to run ten miles to train?"

I hesitated and said, "I think so." {Keepin' it real.}

The week was a strange one for me in the land of training. The first day was crazy sticky humid, and I struggled to keep my mind in the game. I was exhausted, mentally speaking, and the run seemed to stretch longer than the appointed mileage. The second day, I had run into a situation that left me so angry, I couldn't even eat all day. Running angry and running on empty {literally} seemed to work against me while working in my favor. The third day was the day I actually learned about the cancellation of the the half, and I wondered if knowing I didn't have to improve would affect me negatively. And when that fourth day rolled around, the sun blazed so hot during our run that we both felt physically ill from the second mile forward. My knee hurt, my stomach rolled, and my head was everywhere by in the game.

So in all of that, it wasn't a training week to be proud of. My moments weren't textbook and my mind didn't stay focused on prayer nearly like it should have. {Other than the prayers of Jesus, please don't let me die out here.} But even in that, one set of verses came back to me over and over:

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.

Isaiah 40:29-31a 

In the moments when I did rally the strength to pray for the people of Haiti, I prayed for their strength. I prayed for the moments in which they tried to find the medical help they needed, tried to physically make their way toward it, and got tired. The moments when they were weak, stumbling, and falling. The moments the sun sapped their strength and they poured sweat and had no idea how they would make it the rest of the way.

I know God sees them in those moments and offers them strength as He offered it to me in a week of weariness.

Pressing forward with the training and looking forward to a lighter run on race day!

{Previous Posts on this Topic}

The Haiti Half

Learning in Training #1

Learning in Training #2

Learning in Training #3

Braver Than I Look {apparently}

This has NOTHING to do with today's topic, but I must start by wishing my parents a very happy 61st wedding anniversary. Sixty-one years is a big deal. Ryan and I are halfway to that many months...we'd have to live a long time to make it to that many years. If we do, and you're our caretaker, party for us, will you? I have no doubt we'll be out of our minds by then.

Meanwhile...a throwback to last week and a story I never told you! I have hesitated to write this post mostly because it has to do with guns, and my goodness is that ever way too hot a topic for this non-controversial blogger girl. So please know that I am not writing this to stir any pots. Please don't stir a pot. Just hear a story.

I'm not really a gun-girl. I think the only time I've ever encountered them in any form was back in 2010 when I went on vacation and my hosts lured me into trying their air-soft guns. I tried them, I probably didn't do very well despite their encouragement that I did, and that was the end of that.

But Ryan thought it would be a good thing for both of us to learn some basic skills, so he arranged for his brother to teach us. He's in law enforcement and quite skilled, and a very good teacher, I might add, after sitting in on his class. When I say he taught us, I don't mean he just mentioned a few things in our direction. I mean we sat a table...watched a power point, had verbal quizzes...it was a real class. And I have to say, it was really helpful. I am not really a big fan of classes and meetings, but he made it interesting and some of his points were things I had no idea about, so I came away feeling very educated and thankful that Ryan thought to set it up - and thankful that Rod was willing to take an evening to share his knowledge.

After class came the hands-on training. Rod had arranged for us to go to an outdoor shooting range, and he loaned me a pair of his fancy pants earplug thingies. {I'm sure there's a more technical term. But I like mine better.} Ryan asked if I planned to take out my earrings, and I said, "Why? Wore these on purpose so I can look cute for the pictures."

Right when we arrived, it started to rain, but we held on in case it let up, which it did. But I had to giggle at my own self, because there I was, out in the middle of a field, in my capris and t-shirt and dangly earrings, with big old ear plugs, my Vera Bradley purse hanging on my back, and the umbrella over my head. This is probably not the normal look for the shooting range, is it?

Ryan went first, and he looked like a pro to me!

And then it was my turn.

I will not lie. Scared. Out. Of. My. Ever. Loving. Mind.

It's kind of a bad mix when you throw the girl who hates to fail in a setting where she needs to hold her own in front of her husband, his cop brother, and the two other guys learning alongside us.

Rod told me to just relax. Seriously? Does ANY of this situation look relaxing to you??

So I gave it my best shot...so to speak.

Pretty sure I screamed when the shot finally fired, and all the guys probably laughed at me. But when I was done with that round, and Rod checked, he said, "Just so you know, you had a better shot than your husband."

Boom.

We each took turns at another round, and Ryan rocked it!!

The second time, I had one really bad shot, and I remembered that in our class, we learned one of the biggest mistakes you can make is to forget to breathe.

I forget to breathe often. Like this week...I've been a writing fool, and I've gotten so engrossed in my writing, I've totally forgotten to breathe. So when it occurred to me that I forgot to breathe, Rod stood there and said BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE...while I waited for my shot to fire. And it turns out he was right! That did help!

In the end, I won. I realize this is not a game, and there really aren't winners, but I so rarely win that I am making it a win/lose, and am declaring myself the winner.

Ryan was proud of me, although he did laugh when he found out I had every intention of keeping that paper. Forever.

And his mom told me later, that Rod didn't think I'd actually do it. Hey. I may be a big chicken, but I am NOT going to chicken out in front of all the boys. I'm braver than I look.

{PS - I may have come the closest to center this time, but Ryan ROCKED IT. He did great, and I am so proud of him!!!}