Bits for Sunday, August 9, 2009

I worked on writing a Bible study today. Those are always quite a production here in Bekahland…Bibles spread all over the living room, notebooks with all my late-night research scribbled inside, and the trusty computer ready to take on every word I write down. A few hours later, I emerged with a study mostly written. Well…entirely written, but still in need of some tweaking.

In the course of my research, I found this sentence in a Matthew Henry commentary, and it stuck with me. I was researching Peninnah, the “other woman” in the marriage of Hannah and Elkanah. Peninnah was the one who had the kids Hannah longed for…but she didn’t have Elkanah’s love…because he reserved that for Hannah alone. The commentary said, “Peninnah could not bear the blessing of fruitfulness, but she grew haughty and insolent; Hannah could not bear the affliction of barrenness, but she grew melancholy and discontented.”

Peninnah could not bear the blessing.

Wow.

Hannah’s problem was a social curse. To be childless in those days was disastrous. Men needed children…sons, especially. It wasn’t just about carrying on the family name, although that was part of it. They needed children to help with the family work. They needed warriors to protect their people. Women needed children to provide for them when they grew old and were widowed. To not have children…was unthinkable.

Peninnah’s problem was a personal curse. More than likely, she was brought into Elkanah’s life just to bear children, since Hannah could not. And that is exactly what she did. The Bible doesn’t say how many, but it implies that there were several. A household filled with a wonderful mix of personalities and potential. Little creative minds just begging to be cultivated into all they could be. Cuddlers and pranksters, jokesters and thinkers…little lives bubbling with promise and hope as little lives do best. Teachable moments in the family tent…storytelling around the fire after dark…watching the blossoming interests even in childhood. Hers was a rich and blessed life! And yet she could not bear the blessing.

Made me wonder if I’m unable to bear the blessing, too. If I’m missing the glory of what I have because I’m too engrossed in what I wish I had. If I hurt God’s heart when He sees me choosing to overlook what He has placed in my life. Choosing to focus my energies on trying to coerce him to see things my way.

I don’t want that to be my legacy. I don’t want people to look over my life – now or when I’m gone – and say I was unable to bear the blessing. I want to embrace it. Live it fully. Love every minute.