Going Back

I know that some of you who read here each day don't live in Indiana, and I know different states are in different phases of opening right now, so here's a quick look at where we've landed for the time being. Last Friday, we entered Stage 3 of our state's "Back on Track" plan, which will carry us through June 13.

* We are no longer under any travel restrictions.
* We can have social gatherings of up to 100 people.
* Face masks are recommended.
* Remote work is encouraged.

And with that, today I'll be heading back to full-time work at the church. I've been working from home, but since our church reopened for worship on Sunday, they wanted to reopen the church offices. I have my own office space, so I'll be able to work a good and safe distance away from others, but it's going to be quite an adjustment to being away from home after two months! My shoes and real clothes aren't going to know what hit them.

Because this change effectively ends my quarantine season, I've been feeling pretty reflective on these last eight or so weeks. I've been thinking back over the things I/we did that I'm grateful for and the things I/we didn't do that I wish we would have.

It's always strange to enter a season that you know will mark you forever, but not know how long you'll be in that season. I remember feeling similarly when Ryan's mom was sick. We knew our time with her was limited, but we didn't know how limited. We wanted to make the most of the time, but we didn't know how hard to push, because we didn't know how long our energy needed to last.

I'm pretty sure none of us imagined, when we came home from our respective last days of work, that we would still be this secluded at this point in the year. I know I didn't.

I think if I had known, I would have been much more purposeful from the start about making a firm schedule and sticking to it. I did a lot of resting at the start - partly because my heart was exhausted from the fear of the unknown - and I couldn't pull myself into motion. I worried about Ryan getting sick. I worried about either one of us making someone else sick, even if we didn't show symptoms. I worried about running out of food (and toilet paper). Those things paralyzed me for a while.

Then I started to find my faith footing and pressed forward with trying to live a full life here with Ryan.

* We celebrated three birthdays in quarantine and had so much fun with each of them. The days will be memorable, not because we took masked photos, but because we genuinely had fun at home together, enjoying the things we love.

* We had our first Easter on our own and it was saturated in rest and worship. Easter is always a galloping holiday - galloping from one gathering to the next, and this time it was a reflective day.

* I caught up on almost every single scrapbook project in my queue. I only have one that didn't get finished. I don't know that I've ever gotten and stayed this caught up for this long.

* We knocked out several projects around the house. They weren't major home improvement projects, but they were little time-consuming things that we finally had time to complete.

* We worked out together, because Ryan's gym closed. We ate at home more than ever. Ryan perfected his breakfast skills, he used the grill often, and I tried my hand at new things - like homemade bread.

* We had long conversations - sometimes while we painted, sometimes on neighborhood walks, and sometimes on our sun porch, which was the biggest life saver of all in this season.

* I had time for extra Bible study and prayer, both of which I sorely needed.

Of course there are things I wish I would have done differently. But I am grateful for the things I did well - the things we did well. This season was life-changing for us. It taught us so much about our hearts, our dreams, and our faith. I am so grateful for it. And even though I know it will be nice to see friends again, I'm going to miss this season of slowness.