Lifeway Women's Leadership Forum

It is a rare, rare thing for the two of us to spend nights apart. We choose not to do it because we are better together, but evvvvvvery now and then, one of us has to be gone, and it was my turn this past weekend. Stories of our time apart...and my apologies for how very fast I talked. I was either really caffeinated or still very sleep deprived!

Listen here

You'll hear more about this in the podcast, but of course I have pictures for you too! (Please note that I was unable to take my good camera, so I have very poor quality cell phone shots for all these, but it will give you an idea!)

I've had this conference on the calendar for several months, and I was really looking forward to the chance to learn and make new friends, but I was also highly anxious about leaving Ryan behind. Not only do we not enjoy being apart, but he knows all my travel weirdness, and I wasn't sure a dozen other women would find it quite as charming. :)

We planned to take the church van, but it was going to be 100% full in seating, plus luggage, so we were admonished to pack conservatively. I don't even know what that means. Apparently it means this:

You can't really see my purse on my shoulder, but it was packed (aka weighed down) and other than that, this little carry on and a tote bag made up my entire luggage for four days. So what this tells you right here is that God is still in the business of miracles, because if you know me, you know there's really no other explanation. I take this much to church on a regular basis. (And now you know why the camera didn't get to go on vacation with me.) Not to belabor the point, but as I stare at this photo, I do believe this may be the single greatest accomplishment of my year.

Okay, moving on. :) Because we didn't really want to leave our car sitting in the church parking lot for four days - and because Ryan wanted to use said car while I was gone - he took me to the church at lunch time and dropped me off. We took this photo right before the dam behind my eyes burst and I had a flat out meltdown right there in front of all the ladies about to road trip with me.

Yep. I was that wife. And I didn't even care.

I dried it up before the group photo:

Yes, I am in the back clutching my coffee cup. :) The four women on the left side of the photo are my fellow women's leadership team members. (We have one more, but she is just a few weeks away from having a baby and didn't feel she should risk an out-of-state trip that late in the game. She actually took the picture for us.)

At the last minute, one of the women decided to also drive her car down, which allowed the van passengers to have more room for sitting/luggage, and it allowed those of us who aren't crazy about crowds in vans to have a smaller vehicle.

The conference was held in Nashville, Tennessee, and the trip there was not NEARLY as smooth as my travel with Ryan had been the week before. We hit a few traffic snags, but nothing lasted too terribly long.

When we arrived in Nashville, we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant. I was a bit concerned when we arrived, because I had never seen this combo offered before:

Tacos and waxing? Oh. Two separate businesses. :)

We stayed in a set of condos at a Wyndham resort near the Opryland hotel. (Or, as our GPS called it, the "oh-pree-land.")

They were really nice - and much more cost-effective than hotel life, especially since we were staying 3 nights.

We traveled down on Wednesday, and the conference started Thursday morning. I didn't really sleep that night, so thank goodness for coffee! I got up early to talk to Ryan on the phone before he went to work. (Nashville is on central time and we're on Eastern, so he was headed out to work before I really needed to be up and coherent.)

 I asked for a selfie and this is what I received.

We made our way to the church for the conference and got our group picture while we all looked fresh and the booth was empty!

My breakout session that morning was about leading anxious women in anxious times. Myself. I'm leading myself in anxious times. LOL! There was actually a lot of good information in there about leading anxious women and how to handle personal anxiety. Cindy Townsend taught the workshop and she had THE most delightful southern accent.

Ironically the session was thoroughly overcrowded, and there were people blocking every aisle and exit. Isn't that perfect for a girl whose anxiety is heightened by crowds?

I forgot to show you our SUPER CUTE conference notebooks. You'll understand why I fell immediately in love:

We left the church to get lunch at The Chop House. I'd never eaten there before, but the food was REALLY good.

One of the ladies ordered this appetizer that I've never before seen on a restaurant menu:

Deviled eggs with candied bacon! I didn't have to be persuaded to try one. It was delicious, and so was my salad that followed:

After lunch, the conference began in earnest, but I've talked enough for today. I'll come back tomorrow.

Firm Foundations

October, as you may or may not have known, was Pastor Appreciation Month. (Maybe it's clergy appreciation month now...I cannot keep up with all the official title changes.) Right at the end of the month, one of my Facebook friends crafted the most beautiful tribute to people who had been pastors to her (officially and unofficially) throughout her life, and I thought it was lovely to read. So lovely, in fact, that I thought I should do a similar post here...but then I got busy telling you all about our trip to Georgia...and then I was gone to a conference...and I never wrote it.

But while I was at the conference, I found out one of my childhood pastors died just a few days ago, so I've decided I really must write this post.

This is the first pastor I ever had, though I do not remember him at all.  Ralph Smallwood was the pastor of our church when I was born, and he was already gone from the church by the time I have memories, but I count him as pivotal in my story, because he dedicated me to the Lord when I was just a couple of weeks old. And so began my foundation of being raised in church and at home to know the Lord.

This man, Paul Enyart, was the pastor I remember from my early childhood, and he's the one who just passed away a few days ago. (The photo is his obituary photo...I didn't have one of him from back in the day. I wasn't the Bekah-razzi then.) My parents kept me in the main service rather than sending me to junior church, so I grew up on Paul's sermons. And isn't it interesting the things that particularly stick out to you in the grand scheme of memory? One of the clearest memories I have of him as our pastor was toward the end of his time with us. He had turned in his resignation but was still our pastor, and our church was sort of flailing in an attempt to find his replacement. I was too young to fully understand all the difficult things that were happening, but I remember seeing him stand behind the pulpit one Sunday morning and do his best to guide us back on course (with this beautiful blend of love and discipline that I'm sure is excruciatingly hard for ministers to find). What I remembered from that moment was that even though he was leaving, he still loved us and wanted us to do well.

The pastor of my late elementary, and junior high years was Fred Littlefield, and I think he was the first pastor I really made a deep connection with as a person. Pastor Fred was just a delight. He could have been my grandfather, and he just loved all of us in our church. I'm pretty sure he walked into a messier situation than I could even have known at that time, but he came in with joy and loved us well. I still have notes in the margin of my Bible that came from his sermons. Fred retired and ended up living not all that far from my sister in Kansas. One year when we went to visit her, we had the chance to see him and his dear wife, Naomi. I will treasure this picture forever, because Pastor Fred died just a few weeks later.

After Pastor Fred retired, we had two more pastors at the church I grew up in...first Rick and then Dave. Though I didn't have as deep a connection to either of them as I did to pastors Paul and Fred, I appreciate their role in my story and the ways God grew me through that time!

By the time I was a freshman in college, the Lord led me to another church, where I stayed for eleven years, and during that time, I sat under the teaching of Pastor Steve Colter. He had been established at that church for a while when I arrived and he is still there, which I think is an amazing tribute to his heart for the ministry and the people of that church. I learned so much from Pastor Steve - and only part of it was from his sermons. I have pages and pages of notes from those, but he did so much more for my faith journey than just preach to me. I remember the evening he found me in the bookstore, searching for something that would help me find my way in a lost season. He paused to talk with me, didn't judge me for my confusion, and then bought and gifted me a book he thought would help. (And it did!) I remember a time when someone in the church was treating me hurtfully, and he sat down with the two of us to talk it out - and though I figured I would come out the "loser" in the conflict because I was young, he came to my defense. I have never forgotten that. It was possibly the most meaningful thing a minister ever did for me. It was under his ministry that I served on the church board and did a lot of blossoming as a person and believer. When God called me to move on to another church eleven years after arriving, I was not sure what He was up to, but I was so sad to leave Pastor Steve's teaching. I am forever grateful for him. (Also - how do I NOT have a photo with him???)

The church God led me to was a little church outside my hometown, and the first day I walked in, I was absolutely TERRIFIED. I happened to immediately run into the pastor, Jesse Vore, and he welcomed me warmly. He ended up becoming a really good friend to me, in addition to being my pastor. We were near the same age, and I appreciated all that I learned from him and the heart he has for the Lord and for the people of the church. He was one of the first people Ryan and I told about our relationship, and I remember the joy on his face when he found out we were dating. He did our marriage counseling for us, and I will never forget the affirmation he gave us as a couple. It was such a gift!!

Ryan and I attended a church near our home in Marion during a transition period, and though we didn't get terribly involved there, we sat under the teaching of Pastor Steve DeNeff, who has written a number of books and is way smarter than we'll ever be. He taught us many things, and we are grateful.

And now at our church, there are so many pastors who have fed into our lives in so many different ways. When we first started attending, one of the staff pastors took us under her wing and saw something special in us. She stepped away from the church this summer at the Lord's leading, but I still consider her one of my pastors, and I am so grateful for her wisdom and gentle spirit. (And Ryan and I wouldn't be the part of our church that we are today if she hadn't found a place for us!) Pastor Cindy has counseled us and helped us find our place - and we just love her so much! (She was at the conference I attended this weekend and I just loved seeing her!)

I'm grateful for all these. I'm grateful for the pastors who shepherded me for years and for those who were part of my life for just a short time.

And how can I close my thankful post without mentioning Pastor Brian Holland, who was on staff with Pastor Steve when I attended that church, and who baptized me back in 2011? He was the youth pastor of the church, and I was far from youthful, but he invested in me and I loved it that he was part of this pivotal day for me!

And of course, my own personal pastor, who has listened, advised, counseled, and taught me a hundred million things over the years. And he presided over the most important day of our lives. My brother-in-law, Jeff Blackburn, has meant (and still does mean) so much to me. Picking his brain and talking Scripture with him is one of my favorite things to do.

These men and women are just a sampling of the many who have given me a beautifully firm foundation in the Lord. I am grateful for each of them and for all the rest. (I should probably write many more posts.)

The Shafferland Shuffle

I did it! I made it through the next wave of a crazy schedule! I have a few days marked out this week for photo editing, scrapbooking and serious Hallmark movie-ing!

Here's a peek at our rather unusual week!

* We totally enjoyed our extra hour of sleep last Sunday...in Bowling Green, Kentucky! That was our stopping point on our trip home from Atlanta. After a good night of sleep and a fabulous hotel breakfast, we resumed travel and got home (with Zaxby's salads in tow) in the afternoon. Spent the rest of the day resting and enjoying football before gearing up for a new week!

* Monday morning began with a beautiful sunrise, and after Ryan went to work, I kicked it into high gear with an all day game of catch-up-from-being-gone and prepare-to-be-gone-again. I was pretty successful, too! We went out for groceries after Ryan got home from work. He found he gift he'd like for Christmas, and he also found a fun spare hand at the coffee shop that made for endless photo opps whilst waiting for lattes.

* Tuesday was SUCH FUN!!! I worked in the morning and then guess who came to see me in the afternoon? LYNNE FORD!!!!!! Oh my. I haven't seen her in probably two years, and it made my heart so full to get to spend an entire afternoon with her. We talked (without taking a breath) for three solid hours and then went to see Ryan at work before she went home. It was like no time had ever passed since I last saw her, and we loved every bit of our conversations. We had just enough time to squeeze in a trip to the polls between Ryan getting off work and small group people arriving.

* And then came the tough day: Wednesday. Months ago, I committed to going to a leadership conference with a group of women from our church. Though I love things like this and was excited to go learn, I had been dreading the separation from Ryan with everything in my being. I hate being apart from him. But I tried to be a brave soldier and spent the morning packing light and prepping to head south once again - to Nashville, Tennessee. A dozen of us from church headed out around noon and arrived safely in Tennessee that evening - ready to make new friends and learn new things!

* Thursday was such a full day! We arrived at the conference about 8:30 in the morning and got back to our rooms about 9:30 that night. We laughed and cried and prayed and sang and ate (a lot!!) and took in way more information than I've had time to process just yet. My favorite part of the day? Sitting in on a session taught by Lisa Harper. That was kind of a bucket list moment for me, and I was so happy!! Ryan held down the fort at home and sent me selfies so I wouldn't feel so lonely.

* Friday was another 12 hour day of conferencing and learning. There were about 1600 women at this conference, so that was a LOT of people in one place, but I was able to balance people time and quiet time between sessions. The very last session made me laugh until my sides hurt, and the prayer at the end made me cry off all my mascara. Ryan survived his Friday night without me (ha!) and was so kind to send more pictures for me. (I love his attention to photo detail.)

* The conference wrapped up Saturday morning, and we spent the rest of the day traveling home. Ryan, meanwhile, worked all day and went to a birthday party for our nephews. For any of you wondering, yes, I nearly knocked Ryan over in the parking lot when I got back to the church. Didn't even care how ridiculous we may have looked! I really did love the chance to learn at this conference. It was a privilege! But I'm so glad to be home once again. :)

The Saturday Six

One.

I can't believe it's been 9 years since I spent a year reading through the wonderful devotional book Streams in the Desert. It was such a God-ordained read for me that year, and I still heartily recommend it to anyone searching for a devo book to read. This last weekend I found one of the passages shared on a blog, and I wanted to pass it along to you here. Are you in a season of waiting for anything? These words are for you.

Two.

I don't have a Cricut or any similar device, so I wouldn't be able to DIY all the items in here, but this is such a cute idea! A stay cozy gift box to give to a friend in the fall! (Hint: could also make a great Christmas gift idea if you modified a few things!)

Three.

Starting to plan for Christmas? Here's a super cute DIY composition notebook planner. (I'm such a sucker for anything that involves the words planner and composition notebook. Add cute and I'm totally sold.)

Four.

I usually share these with you if I happen to know they're going on...the Christian Fiction Scavenger hunt! Lisa Bergren hosts a couple of these each year (through her blog) and I always find them so much fun to participate in. You get to learn about some of your favorite authors and their writing journeys, and you have the chance to earn free stuff! As I'm writing this post, the official link for the hunt isn't up yet, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to come back and look for it (I'm at a conference) so if I don't get the chance, here's the link Lisa's site, and it will be easy to find from there, I'm sure. Happy hunting! The adventure ends tomorrow!

Five.

We're entering the season of heavy comfort foods, so if you need a few ideas to slide back to the cleaner end of eating, here's a mix-and-match menu plan for you! It even has a few dinner recipes at the bottom!

Six.

And if you're hosting Thanksgiving (or a Friendsgiving or any other giving) this year, here are a few simple decoration ideas you might want to check out! You might need a fresh idea for the middle of the table!

Senior Pictures!

I told you a couple of weeks ago that I took senior pictures for my bonus niece, and her mom told me the day of the photos that if I wanted to share any of them, I had permission to do so. I wanted to give them some time to look through them and share what they wanted, but I thought I'd give you a sampling of some of my own favorites today!

I loved this day and seeing all the sides of her personality that I have loved so much since the day she was born!

83 Months - and an Extra Helping of Gratitude

Ryan and I celebrated 83 months of marriage last weekend while we were in Georgia. It was a most delightful day!

We started by driving into downtown Atlanta and having coffee with Mark and Lynnette at one of the coffee shops they like:

It was a popular place to be; we had to share a table with people we didn't know!

Ryan was excited about his new coffee mug and put it to good use right away:

We went to this beautiful park area to take family pictures for Mark and Lynnette, so we sneaked in a few of our own:

Lynnette took a few for us, too!

The baby may have sneaked into a few...

I have to pause to shout out to Ryan for winning husband of the year (again) on this trip. First, he made the sacrifices for us to make the trip - driving me to Georgia and back in the span of two and a half days and burning a vacation day to do so. He asked our hotels to put us on upper floors because he knows I hate ground floor rooms. He brought me coffee in the mornings and made sure I had a Christmas ornament souvenir to commemorate the trip.

He helped me with the photo shoot, carrying cameras and a stepstool - and even second shooting for me to give me even more pictures to choose from.

Most of all, he made a friend-dream come true by allowing me to be with Lynnette on a day special to her heart. Ryan and I protect our marriage fiercely, and sometimes that means we don't see our friends as often as we did in our single days. But he also understands that friendships matter, and he went to all the lengths on this monthiversary weekend to make sure I could be there for one of mine.

In this month of gratitude, I'm not only thankful for a little miracle baby, but I'm thankful for a husband who served selflessly and gave much so I could take part in a sweet, sweet moment.