The Hollywood-esque Photo Shoot

Thought you might like to see the (very fun) madness that ensued after our wedding and before the reception!

As you know, the wedding was at sunset, and the professional photographer and our videographer wanted to get some pictures of the families, the wedding party, and of the two of us together as the sun was going down. Much later, I realized it was a blessing that the two songs we lost out of the wedding didn't work...because it bought us about 8 more minutes to have sunset pictures!

We were hugging our guests after the wedding when the photographer broke up the party and said we'd need to do that later, because he had to hurry to get pictures! So we asked all the guests to hang around for a bit while we did the next photo shoot. During that time...everything looked a lot like this:

 I threw this picture in because I don't even know what I'm pointing at but I sure am having a violent reaction to it!! (By the way - this moment was also when I met the photographer for the first time. He'd arrived right before the wedding and had gone straight to the ceremony site. Ryan had greeted him but I was in hiding, so I met him officially after the ceremony!

 The first picture he wanted was a group picture. Unfortunately, Adam and Sara had gone back up to our room to get a couple of things we forgot to bring with us. So here's Ryan on the phone, trying to reach them to tell them to hurry back - and the photographer was doing a dress rehearsal with all of us on how to look way up at the camera he'd put in the air (on the end of a pole) so we could get the fishbowl effect.)

 They hurried. :)

 We got that photo, and then Ryan dismissed all the guests to go up near our room to prepare for the reception while we hung back to take pictures.

 I don't have any pictures of this part (yet) but it cracked me up - the photographer was (very understandably) on a tight timeline to get pictures before the sun went down. He's so good at what he does and was all business, shouting for MOM! DAD! HERE! Do you think any of my family members were listening? So finally I yelled "IF YOU'RE A FREELAN, YOU NEED TO COME STAND HERE! AND HURRY!!" Ohhhh Bekah the bridezilla. We tried to tell him we'd already done our own family pics but he insisted that he do more, so we did them! And then he had a shoot just with us. Ryan's mom took some pictures of that while he was busy.

By the way, our photographer was Stephen Rudd and this guy is SO GOOD. He's won a lot of awards, and his work is excellent. We are so excited to see his pics!

Here was one of our poses for Stephen.

 And another of our poses - and Stephen at work.

 Nita got some great sunset pics of us...Stephen was so excited about these just before we lost the sun entirely!!

 Little kissy!

 Ahhhhh perfect for a blog header pic, don't you think?? :)

 Ryan and I also had our first dance down on the beach - just the two of us. We danced to Jeremy Camp's song, My Desire, which was the first song we ever danced to back when we first started dating. (We danced a slow dance every night before we said goodbye. It was our thing.)

 Perfect. Just the two of us. Loved it so much.

As we were leaving the beach, a gentleman stopped me and said he'd taken some pictures on his phone and if I was interested, I could email him and he'd send them to me. He gave me his card and I wrote him right away. He sent some great pictures, so I wanted to share a few of them here. Thanks, John Reece!

Here you can see Stephen taking pictures, with the help of his assistant (by the same name.) And in the black there is Seth Cohen, who was our WONDERFUL videographer. We wanted good video so we can show it at our reception. He was so kind - came early, stayed late, and really took time to make sure we had everything we needed. I appreciated him SO much.

 Such a production!! Loved it. It was so much fun.

 We just kept doing whatever they told us to!

 Felt kind of like a princess. Not gonna lie. :)

This was the crazy busiest half hour of my LIFE but it was so much fun. We loved it. Cannot wait to see Stephen's pictures OR Seth's video! Ryan made great choices with these two! Thanks, Baby!

The Conclusion of the Ceremony

I'm sorry it's taken so long to show you our ceremony! But I really wanted you to feel like you were right there....

Next up...we exchanged our rings! This is the only picture I have of that right now:

Here were the things we said while doing that:

I give you this ring as a symbol of the vows which we make as husband and wife. In the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit...I will wear this ring and thus declare in the presence of all that you are the mate of my choice. I will be faithful to you until death parts us.

Then we were SUPPOSED to pray while this song played:



Alas, Julie's sound system gave up the ghost and the song would not play. I was sad, because I'd always wanted this song played at my wedding, but it was okay. We can work it into the reception somehow.

When we realized it wasn't going to play, Jeff just prayed instead.

Instead of a unity candle, we did a "stone ceremony." Here's what we put in the program:

And the people said to Joshua, “We will serve the Lord our God and obey him.” On that day Joshua made a covenant for the people, and there at Shechem he reaffirmed for them decrees and laws. And Joshua recorded these things in the Book of the Law of God. Then he took a large stone and set it up there under the oak near the holy place of the Lord. “See!” he said to all the people. “This stone will be a witness against us. It has heard all the words the Lord has said to us. It will be a witness against you if you are untrue to your God.”
Joshua 24:24-27

We want our home to bear a tangible record of God’s goodness in our lives. A covenant between the two of us and the God who wrote our love story. Today we lay the first two stones – one for each of us – in this altar.

Ryan:

“Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.”
James 1:12

Bekah, you have prayed many, many years for the husband that God has for you and I am so grateful to be that man.   I will always strive to be the Spiritual leader in our life together.  Thank you for loving me for me.  Lord please guide me as the leader and head of our marriage.  I have experienced a love with Bekah that I didn’t know existed and I am simply amazed.  Help me to show her that love in all that I do as we go on this journey you have set before us.  I pray that we look to you in all circumstances and always give you the glory. 

Bekah:

“Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.”
 Ruth 1:16-17

Ryan, this is my covenant to you. I’m yours for life. I choose you…only you…always you. Abba, create in my heart a continued faithfulness to this man you’ve called me to love so deeply. May our love story be one that causes those watching to see my devotion and loyalty to him and to You…through the way I love him.

We laid the stones in the bowl....

And then we signed our marriage certificate:

After that...it was time for....

A little kissy kissy!!!!

HUSBAND AND WIFE!!!!!!!!!!

Waiting for our recessional song to begin:

That one didn't work either. Sadness. We had given everyone tealights to carry out as they walked behind us after we left the front. The song we were supposed to walk out to was Steve Green's song Find Us Faithful.


But they played Ryan's song to me again and it worked out just fine!! In the end, it worked out better to not have those two songs because it gave us more time with the sunset for pictures! See? God knew!

Mr. and Mrs. Ryan Shaffer!

Our Ceremony

** If you read my blog post from yesterday before about 9:30 in the monring, you should go check it out again! Brad sent me a link so you can download and hear Ryan's song to me - actually HIM singing it! So go listen to that. :) And thanks, Brad, for the link! **

Here are some of the highlights of our ceremony:

My brother-in-law, Jeff, married us, and I loved the way he did the whole thing! At the very beginning, he invited the Father, Son and Holy Spirit to be present at our wedding and in our lives. We symbolized that by having him "light" these three candles (it's the beach, so all candles were battery operated) - and he put them in a bowl of sand taken from the beach where we stood:

Here's what we put in the program about that...

We took several weeks apart to pray about the possibility of this relationship before we even started dating. And in the weeks of dating and engagement, we have loved centering our relationship on the Lord. We’ve spent much time in prayer together, reading from the Bible, sharing devotional time together, and we find it a great honor to pray for each other throughout the day. We know this relationship must be built on the foundation of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit for it to succeed, and that is why we are making a special point to welcome His presence over the wedding and our marriage. The three candles that will be placed on the table at the beginning of the wedding represent the Trinity and shine tonight as a symbol of His light shining over us.

There's a sweet, sweet Spirit in this place,
And I know that it's the Spirit of the Lord;
There are sweet expressions on each face,
And I know they feel the presence of the Lord.
Sweet Holy Spirit, Sweet heavenly Dove,
Stay right here with us, filling us with Your love.
And for these blessings we lift our hearts in praise;
Without a doubt we'll know that we have been revived,
When we shall leave this place.

After that, Jeff shared some thoughts about God's view of marriage and then we did our declaration of intent. Jeff came up with this part but I loved the words so much I wanted to share them with you:

Ryan, the woman by your side is about to become your wife.  Her future happiness will depend on your character, your conduct and your caring.  She will depend on you for trust, encouragement and help for a satisfying and fulfilling life.  Because she will give you the greatest treasure this side of heaven—the love of a woman—you can also give her great joy or cause her untold sorrow and pain.  It all depends on your devotion to her.

Ryan, do you take Rebekah to be your wife?  Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, and forsaking all others live together according to God’s holy law, which is one man and one woman bound together for life?

 If you consent, please say, “I do.”

Rebekah, your life and love will be the source of inspiration and support Ryan will need to live a satisfying and successful life.  He will depend on you for trust, encouragement and help in reaching his ambitions and dreams.  You are part of that dream.  By demonstrating faithfulness and trust you can become his greatest blessing.  Without these, you could become his greatest disappointment.  It all depends on your commitment to him.

Rebekah, do you take Ryan to be your husband?  Do you promise to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, and forsaking all others live together according to God’s holy law, which is one man and one woman bound together for life?

If you consent to this marriage, please say, “I do.”

Then we did our "repeaty vows." I loved these so much. Found them online. We loved them because they're different from the norm:

I, Ryan, take you, Rebekah, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may be one. As is Christ to His body, the church, so I will be to you a loving and faithful husband. Always will I perform my headship over you even as Christ does over me, knowing that His Lordship is one of the holiest desires for my life.  I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care. I promise I will live first unto God rather than others or even you. I promise that I will lead our lives into a life of faith and hope in Christ Jesus. Ever honoring God's guidance by His Spirit through the Word, And so throughout life, no matter what may lie ahead of us, I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband.

 I, Rebekah, take you, Ryan, to be my wedded husband. With deepest joy I come into my new life with you. As you have pledged to me your life and love, so I too happily give you my life, and in confidence submit myself to your headship as to the Lord. As is the church in her relationship to Christ, so I will be to you. Ryan, I will live first unto our God and then unto you, loving you, obeying you, caring for you and ever seeking to please you. God has prepared me for you and so I will ever strengthen, help, comfort, and encourage you. Therefore, throughout life, no matter what may be ahead of us, I pledge to you my life as an obedient and faithful wife.

And then we read our vows that we'd written. You already read mine last week, and I'll have Ryan send his to me so I can share those with you on another day. But here are our photos of that. Please make a note that when Ryan pulled his out of his pocket, he held up one finger. ONE PAGE. Woopsie. So mine were two....

This one got really long...think I'll finish the wedding tomorrow! Hope you're liking the coverage!

Let the Wedding Begin!!

Disclaimer...I have very few pictures of the actual ceremony. My sister and friend Christi took a few...and Ryan's mom took a few. But the majority will have to wait until we get our professional photos. Nevertheless, I'll share with you what I have along with more text from our program. Hope you enjoy. Might take a couple of days to get through the whole wedding. Hope that's okay!!!

First, let's talk about the weather, shall we? I had prayed and prayed so hard that God would give us a pretty day for the wedding. After all, about 30 people had paid quite a bit of money to travel a long way to watch a beach wedding and I so hated to have that all be in vain! God was more than gracious. An 82 degree day on the second of December - and perfect sunshine all the way through the day. We thanked Him over and over for this blessing! Ryan's mom took this picture right before the wedding started. This was our backdrop:

Stunning.

Ryan found a wedding coordinator through an online search. Her name was Julie and she was in charge of bringing all the chairs, setting up our wedding canopy, making an aisle for me with tiki torches, and playing the music for the wedding. She did an amazing job. We so appreciated her. (And of all the coordinators we researched, she was far and away the most reasonably priced with the most options to offer AND she really cared about our wedding!)

This picture gives you a basic idea of what the setup looked like:

We had the option of having color tulle on the canopy but we wanted just a clean, white look with shells hanging from the top and starfish tying back the tulle. We had two rows of chairs on each side that sort of curved around so everyone had a good seat. And she made an aisle leading up to the chairs with tiki torches. (The guys hovering around the canopy were our photographers and videographer, getting some pre-wedding footage.)

This is a photo of the scene from another angle:

We had a little table at the entrance where Cassie and her boyfriend, CJ handed out programs, tealight candles (battery operated) and stones for people to sign. We did that in lieu of a guest book. Here was our explanation from the wedding program:

When you came in today, you signed a stone and on the other side, you wrote the meaning of your name. We are the people we are today because of each of you. Because of your love. Because of your investment in our lives. The character traits that your names represent are the very sorts of things that have been poured into our lives. We will keep these stones as a reminder of your presence in our lives and each time we see your names and what they mean, we’ll be reminded of what you’ve invested in us. Thank you for who you are. Thank you for loving us.

Everyone sat down and the wedding began with the seating of our parents and the entrance of the wedding party. I'm sorry I don't have pictures of those. (I'll share pics of this when I get the professional ones in.)

But we had all those people enter to the hymn Great is Thy Faithfulness as performed by Selah. They were the first group we ever saw in concert together. Here is what our program said - and then I'll link to Selah's rendition of the song if you want to hear it:

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:21-23

As our families and bridal party make their entrance, please listen to the lyrics of this hymn. It is because of God’s faithfulness that we are here today. The words are our testimony and we are proof that His faithfulness is great, His mercies are new every morning, and because of His great love, we are not consumed.  

And then it was time for me. Not sure if I told you on the blog before or not...but I did not know what song I'd be walking in to at the wedding. I asked Ryan to choose a song he wanted to hear when I walked across the sand to him, and I didn't want to know what it was until I heard it that day. I had absolutely NO idea what he'd pick. I didn't know if it would be a traditional wedding song or a song we'd loved so much together or what. No idea. Julie (our coordinator) knew I didn't know, so she signaled me to start walking out of the little weed cove where I'd been hiding when it was time. (The next three pictures courtesy of my sister, Julie)

 This was Dad asking if I was nervous. My response: "Not at all. Just ready to be married!"

 At this point I was straining to hear the song. I finally heard it and knew I didn't know it. So I was leaning, trying to hear the words...

...and then I recognized the voice. It was Ryan. He had recorded a song for me. It surprised me so much because he'd told me from the very beginning he didn't want to sing at the wedding. He said he would if I really wanted him to but he'd rather not. I said that was fine - I wanted him to be able to enjoy the day. But then he heard this song by Matthew West and decided he wanted to be the one singing it to me on our wedding day. So Ryan, Adam, and a couple other friends of theirs, Darr and Brad, went to the church and recorded it.




* This just in!! If you want to hear Ryan's recording...try downloading it from here. **

Arriving at the altar with Dad...telling him he can sit down. :) (The perils of no rehearsal.)

 The picture above and below were taken by my friend Christi, and this one below is one of my favorites of the whole wedding. I love how he's reaching for me.

 This one taken by my sister, Julie...still listening to the song and looking into Ryan's eyes. (And trying not to cry.)

 Loved every moment of that song.

Come back tomorrow for more wedding?

Our Wedding Party

Weird things happen when you plan a destination wedding. So many things about what you always thought you'd do in your wedding have to be examined - sometimes adjusted, sometimes eliminated, and sometimes added! This part was probably the hardest for me out of all the wedding planning: how to choose a wedding party?

I've been in five weddings as a bridesmaid, I have a bunch of great girlfriends, and I had no idea how to pick who should stand with me that day. I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings (though I'm sure I did) - and we also wanted to be be careful to remember that for anyone to go to our wedding meant they'd have to pay to travel. How do you ask people to pay so much to come to your wedding?

In the end, after much discussion, this is what we decided to do: we had Ryan's best friend and his wife, and my best friend and her husband stand up with us. Two couples - alongside us for the weekend - supporting us as we began our life as a couple.

As you also might remember, we had the Build-a-Bears up there, representing my nephew Kirk and my former roommate, Angela, both of whom have died. This was our wedding party!

We got some great pictures (courtesy of Ryan's Mom, Nita) of our wedding party, so I'll put them here for you to see, along with the text as we had it in our (sixteen page - EEEK!!!) wedding program introducing our wedding party to our guests. Hope you enjoy!

Mark and Lynnette Johnson (Bekah's best friend and her husband)

Bekah and Lynnette met in 1988 at Amboy Friends Church. Lynnette attended church there and Bekah’s brother-in-law (and the officiant today!) became the pastor. When Bekah visited the church one Sunday morning, Lynnette served as her Sunday School buddy. Bekah’s sister, Lori, sensed a good friendship hiding below the surface and arranged a playdate (before such things even really existed.) And so it was that two girls who have never lived in the same town, never attended the same church, never attended the same school – became best friends – and remain so to this day.

In 2002, Bekah stood beside Lynnette as she became Mrs. Mark Johnson, and the sweet friendship continued, welcoming Mark right in as part of the family! Today, Bekah is excited and honored to have these life friends stand beside her and witness her union to Ryan.

Mark and Lynnette, thank you for loving me through years of heartache and confusion. Thank you for listening, crying with me, taking care of me when I struggled, and being there always. I’m so grateful you’re here today, standing right behind me as I walk forward into the future God has written for me.


Adam and Sara VanDam (Ryan's best friend and his wife)

Ryan and Sara went to high school together and attended the same church growing up.  Adam and Sara met in college and were married on June 3, 2000. They immediately moved to Michigan where Adam took a position as a youth pastor and Sara as a teacher.  In May 2002 they moved to Greentown where they both have continued as youth pastors and teachers.  Ryan and Adam connected immediately when they moved here as they both found they had much in common.  They have had many extreme experiences over the years ranging from many late nights working on each other’s houses (which normally ends in injury or near death – good times) to white water rafting the rapids in West Virginia to late night talks over coffee.   Ryan and Sara also became good friends because of their love of music.  They have served on the worship team at church for many years, sung countless specials together and worked together on numerous projects within the church.  Ryan has also joined them many times for youth group outings and mission trips that have been full of joy and laughter.

Ryan and Bekah are both so excited and grateful for their friendship and for joining with them today as they marry.  They have shown over and over the love of Christ through their friendship and support of Ryan and Bekah.    

Adam and Sara, thank you for loving me and standing here with me today.  You have both been true friends throughout all I have faced.  I love you both and can’t thank you enough for welcoming Bekah with open arms.       

*** I'm not sure anyone got a close up of the bears at the ceremony - except perhaps the professional photographer and I don't have his pictures yet. But I got this one from Lynnette's photos, taken during the reception time. So these were the bears and what I wrote about Angela and Kirk. ***

Posthumous Bridesmaid and Groomsman Angela Kent and Kirk Blackburn

For three years after she graduated from college, Bekah had a roommate named Angela Kent. They were about as opposite as two girls can be – Angela loved motorcycles, adventure, and singing loudly. Three years ago, she was pursuing her PhD in counseling when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She fought valiantly, insisting that as long as she had quality of life, she would fight. When doctors gave her five years, she came to Bekah and said that as part of her bucket list, she wanted to be able to be a bridesmaid in a wedding – because she never had that opportunity. Bekah promised her the chance to do that, but Angela died one year ago yesterday – December 1, 2011. Today Bekah keeps her promise to Angela and makes her a bridesmaid.

Angela, I’m so grateful for the three years we shared. You taught me so many skills (especially those communication skills!) that have prepared me to be the wife Ryan needs and deserves. You are loved and missed, but today your wish comes true. You are my bridesmaid.

When Bekah was 10 years old, her very first nephew, Kirk Blackburn, was stillborn. His death was most unexpected and devastating to a family so ready to love and welcome a baby. But God used Kirk’s death as the foundation of a deep love relationship between Bekah and her Abba. The confusion and hurt of Kirk’s death became the way she knew God cared about everything – even a hurting little girl who just wanted a nephew. Since he never has the opportunity to be a groomsman, she wanted to make him a groomsman today and honor his life which so impacted hers, though he never took a breath on this earth.

Kirk, I’m so thankful for your life and so wish you could be here with us today to celebrate in person. You’re never ever forgotten and it is my joy to honor your memory in this way today. Thank you for being instrumental in drawing me close to Jesus. I love you so much, Buddy.

*Kirk and Angela are represented by the Build-a-Bears at the front. They are carried by Bekah’s only niece, Cassie Blackburn.* And here are some other pictures of our wedding party fun on the big day! This was me looking wistfully into the distance. I'm not a good wistful looker, I don't think.

 Chillin - aka sweating my fool head off - before the wedding!!!

 Me with the guys. (The videographer asked if we were related and when we said no, he said, "Um well can you at least act like you like each other?" Apparently we were standing way too far apart. This was our solution.)

 We had used the & sign in our engagement photos and we wanted to use it again in the wedding pics. So we got a smaller version for each couple as part of our gift to them - and we used them in this picture. I love it.

 WAKE UP, RYAN!! TIME TO GET MARRIED!!!!!!!!

 The guys relaxing before the wedding....

 This is one of my favorite pictures of the whole wedding. Love it.

 It takes a village...to get the bride into a seated position in this dress!!

 EWWWW!! KISSING!!!!!!!

 Asleep again. Wow. This wedding really got to him!!

 And there you have it! Our wedding party! I think tomorrow we might just start a wedding. What do you think?