Sunday Sentiments

Today is Mother's Day, and I stare at this day with fresh perspective this year.

I was born on Mother's Day 43 years ago, though this year my birthday doesn't align with Mother's Day. I am grateful for my mom and all she has done throughout these 43 years to raise me and support me well. I appreciate all she intentionally and unintentionally taught me in the 18 years I lived at home with her. And in the 25 years (WHAT??) since I moved out of the house, I appreciate all she has done to continue to support me and care for me well. 

After all, when we got that 1 a.m. phone call back in February saying that Allen had died, she was the first person I called. Let's face it: there aren't too many people you can call in the middle of the night. But moms aren't exempt from those calls. (And she answered!) 

When Ryan and I married, I gained two more moms, in his mom and step-mom. Both of them welcomed me as a bonus daughter, and I was so grateful.

Ryan's mom loved me well and I am so thankful for the good and fun times we enjoyed together when her health allowed her to go out and do things. We loved playing with our cameras and enjoying beautiful things together. And for as desperately hard as it was to care for her (because I'm not good at being a nurse) while she lived with us after her surgery and in her final days, I'm crazy thankful that we had those weeks and months together to say all the things and make all the memories. 

 I don't know that I have a single picture of just me with Ryan's step-mom, so hopefully this group shot from my 40th birthday party will suffice. Lynn is so sweet. We used to go out for coffee together now and then when we lived in the same town. She'll text me words of encouragement, and I'm so thankful for her and the investment she makes in us. 

And now here I am, 43 years past my appearance on Mother's Day, and the day has new meaning for me this year. Ryan and I don't have children, but our job, which has come to us since this same day last year, has changed everything about how we see parenting.

To be clear, we aren't the parents of the young adults in our building. That's not what our job means and it's not what we strive to be for our tenants. 

But as Christ-followers, we cannot live in close proximity with these people without growing to love them deeply and caring profoundly about their lives. 

Some of them choose to see us as parents. We don't force that on them, but some of them have chosen to place us in that role in their hearts. They come to us with all the same problems, joys, sorrows, questions, confusions, and excitement that we have always taken to our parents. They think of us as family, and while we never expect it, we are honored and humbled when it does happen. 

I love them fiercely, just as I know my mom loves me. I've cried over them. I've cried with them. I've rejoiced at their victories. I've done all I know to do to help them feel seen, known, and loved. 

For those of you reading today who are mothers, I would guess you heard the word mama for the first time from the mouth of baby. The first time I heard it was from someone all grown up, but it was no less profound and sacred to my heart.

Our "kids" will come and go, and we know that. Some of them will probably want to be part of our lives forever and others will need the space and freedom to move on to new chapters that don't include us. We support whichever path is best for them. But while they are here with us, we commit to investing to the fullest. Even when it's confusing or hard. 

Today I celebrate the mothers who made an impact on me: my own mother, my moms-in-law, and those whose lives I observed even though they may not have realized it. Today I celebrate the young adults who have seen me as a mother-figure in their lives this past year. I haven't always (ever?) known what I'm doing, but I hope they know I'm praying and advocating for them with every fiber of my being. 

And today I celebrate all of you who are mothers in any way. In every way. 

Happy Mother's Day.