How the Other Half (?) Lives

I SO WISH I had pictures for you, but it was too weird to ask about pictures. So all I have are my words, and in this case, the pictures would be better.

A friend of mine is house-sitting for some folks who live a little higher off the hog than I do. And by "a little higher," I mean they own the blessed pig farm. As a figure of speech anyway.

Today was my chance...to visit the mansion, as I've come to call it. My visit began with a sentence I've never uttered before. "Do I take the left driveway or the right one?"

I walked around during my tour of that house, and my jaw never left the floor. Never once.

* I've seen these on HGTV but never in real life...the refrigerators that are so carefully hidden within the cabinetry that you have to hunt around for it like you're searching for a secret passage way. I opened the thing just because I could. Had the same old stuff in it mine does...just a much heavier door to get to it!

* Here's another sentence I've never said in a house before. "Oh that's not the bathroom door. That's the elevator door."

* Spiral staircase between all three floors. Yeah. I needed my Belle dress!!

* Was it seven bathrooms? Or nine? I can't remember.

* I had to have a lesson in turning on the lights. At my house you just flip a switch and a light appears. At this house, the lesson began with "See that keypad with five green lights on it? The top left one will turn on the lights."

* Oh this house had a butler's kitchen. In addition to the main kitchen. AND in addition to the wet bar. Now the wet bar does nothing for me because I don't drink. But I was a bit miffled to find that the wet bar was larger THAN MY ACTUAL KITCHEN. And essentially, it was their third kitchen!

* I drooled a bit over the gorgeous bookshelves in the main office. Yes, main office. I never saw the secondary one.

* I did, however, catch a glimpse of the workout room. Since it was my day of rest, I didn't participate.

* But the best moment of all was...the theater. I arrived there after passing the ticket booth and walking under the marquee. There it was...theater seating, complete with cup holders, steps, and rope lighting.

SHUT UP.

And of course, I parted hearing the same thing I say to all my guests as they leave my house: "Just pause at the end of the driveway and the gate will open."