Okay - here's the question of the day.
I realize that this may sound horrible, but it's a real question that one of my friends and I have. What do you say when you go to see a baby and you can't honestly say the baby is cute? I mean you REALLY can't say it? Is this just one of those times when you should lie and repent later? Or are there catch phrases that work without being obvious?
One of the ladies that I polled at work said that she cried so hard when someone told her that her baby boy was "sweet" because she knew that was code for "I have to say something nice and avoid saying he's cute because he's not." She also said that later, when she had another baby that she realized was awkward in appearance, she would just say so up front to ease the tensions of the potential compliment givers.
So...to avoid saying "What a precious baby!"....we need some ideas.
39 minutes ago
11 comments:
That's a very unique baby you have! haha I would just say "hopefully she grows into her cute"
Have you seen that seinfeld episode with the ugly baby???
Phats - maybe I'll just take you with me next time I encounter this and let you do the talking.
YES i've seen that one - and Friends has a similar one. Rachel said "He's really something isn't he?" and I though that was a pretty good answer. Of course she had gasped right before that, so it sort of gave her away.
If the baby is awake I like, "Oh, look how alert he is. He's just looking at everything." If he's sleeping, "Oh, he's sleeping!" Or comment on how tiny his little fingers (or whatever is showing) are. Or how much hair he has, because my kids were both born bald as cue balls (so was I) and it's such a blessing to have a baby with hair.
Stuff like that. Observe details to avoid the general cute/sweet dilemma.
I'm with Skyepuppy. Pick a certain feature to comment about like his eyes or hair or tiny feet. No new mom with think anything bad about that.
Or you could go with Seinfeld's approach...that baby is just "breathtaking"! However, if they know that episode...well, it could get awkward!
I have been in your shoes, just so you know, with a very good friend. I have to admit, I just lied, and now nearly 6 months later, I can say it honestly. Somehow, I think God will forgive me!
Ew, this reminds me of an ad on TV for diapers or something, with the freakiest looking baby on it. I honestly feel sorry for the ad's producer, who obviously had to put this baby in the commercial because he didn't have the heart to tell the baby's parents that its spawn was fugly.
Parents are stupid about their children.
That said, I would possibly just lie. The truth hurts more, right?
Skyepuppy - I'd not thought of that one. Focusing on the ACTIONS. Nice. And truth be told, I'd rather have a baby that sleeps than one that is cute. I mean I'd RATHER have both, but if I have to pick, I'll take a sleeper.
Christina - You make an excellent point about being able to be genuine later in life. I've heard that some of the ugliest babies turn out to be the cutest grownups - and the other way around. And I've known some "precious babies" who really did become model-adorable toddlers.
Jacob - As much as I'd hate to lie and say the kid is cute (if pressed to say that, because some parents NEED you to say it), I'd be afraid that if I didn't, I might have the mom mad at me forever. And new moms are like mama bears with their cubs - you just don't mess with them.
And all of this has me thinking - what is the need for the kid to be cute anyway? Aren't there more important things for babies? Why can't those things matter as much to the parents as the proclomation of cute-ness?
This works. What a precious gift from God! And they are! Of course, now I can't use it with you if you should ever have children. ;O)
Tina - I should hope that if I ever have kids and they are aesthetically awkward, people will not feel obligated to lie. Of course the kiddo will be cute to me. She'll be mine! But no need to lie about it. "wow that's a rough start" works just fine.
The need for "cute" is that brand-new babies don't actually do anything. You can't comment on how athletic or intelligent he is, or how well-behaved. All of that comes later. (Although, when my son was about 4 or 6 months old, a guy at a barbecue told me my son looked "like he was born getting the joke." In retrospect, BBQ guy was probably right.)
Well, yeah. But babies aren't capable of doing anything of note, so what they have going for them is mostly how cute they are. If they aren't cute, then you just have to wait for them to either grow up and be geniuses or become good looking kids. Harsh, but it's sort of a fact of life.
I gave you the best advice, honesty is the best policy!
Post a Comment