Not only am I NOT Smarter than a 5th Grader...

...I finally gave in and join the wellness program at work. The thing holding me back was the required physical, but I forced myself to get one last week. I was told it would be no big deal. Well of course my blood pressure was up due to office stress prior to going in for the physical. That's something I've come to expect. And then I had to put on a paper shirt. Anything involving paper clothing crosses the "no big deal" line in my mind.

We established that although my father had prostate cancer, I was probably safe from getting that. We established a few other things that I'll spare you for my own dignity's sake.

I dropped off my medical clearance form and picked up my "tracking card" so I can keep track of my exercise. THEN the lady gave me the form that tells what exercise is worth on the point system.

Later that evening I sat down to read it and within 20 seconds, I determined I'm too stupid for the wellness program. I had to have someone in the office explain it to me. I'm not sure I entirely get it. I didn't see a category for "nearly died on the elliptical" or "was almost killed by co-worker in the gym."

So I've decided to work out a deal with Rachel (from my office) every day. I'll tell her what I did and she'll tell me how much it's worth.

Good thing that wasn't my test for employment!