Our Merry Little Christmas

Our Christmas season looked very different this year. We have been spending each spare moment working on the projects at the lake so we can wrap them up, so we didn't get a chance to do most of the typical traditions we always enjoy. (It took me a while to work through that in my head, but it all turned out okay!) 

One of our family Christmas get-togethers was canceled (a permanent change) and another has been postponed twice - once for illness and once for weather). In addition, since Christmas fell on Sunday this year, we had church to add to the schedule - no complaints there!)

All that to say, it was just a different sort of Christmas this year.

Ryan spent most of Christmas Eve working at the lake, and I spent the day working on last minute Christmas prep. He came home and we both got ready for our Christmas Eve service, which was later at night. We found ourselves with an hour or so to spare, so we decided to go ahead and have our Christmas at home together. We figured Christmas Day would be long and tiring, so we would just enjoy our gift exchange a little bit early this year. 

Typically we get a "big" gift to share throughout the year and then just exchange stocking stuffers. We never got around to the big gift this year, but I am assuming we will slap a bow on something we're getting for the house (like an area rug) and call it Christmas. The perils of home renovations meeting up with Christmas, I suppose! We did, however, exchange stocking stuffers, and that was so much fun. We also took our picture by the tree, and I'm so glad we did, because by the time we got home Christmas night, we looked awfully bedraggled.

We let Lexi and Braeya open their stockings so they would be occupied and not overly helpful as we tried to open ours. ;) 

And then it was our turn! Ryan got me some fun gifts!

This first one was a joke. He used the ham container to hold one of my gifts. ;) 

Tea strainer! (That's a story for later.)

Matthew Perry's memoir has been on my want-to-read list since I heard it was out, and he got it for me! 

(There were more gifts too, but I'm trying not to show you everything I unwrapped. LOL!) Ryan took his turn opening...

He picked these out for himself. Brought them home from the store, slid them over to me and said, "Put these in my stocking." LOL! So here's his surprised face.

He could not figure out what this one was.

A new lunchbox! His present lunchbox is so gross. He got it when he worked at the rehab hospital. It was a freebie, and he's carried it for years now. It's dingy and gross and I can't bring myself to put his food in it one more time. So a shiny new lunchbox for the win!!

After our gift exchange, we went to church for the candlelight service.

(We were sitting pretty close to the front, so I didn't keep pulling out my phone in the dark.)

So that was the start of Christmas! Then on Christmas Day, we went back to church for the morning service. It was one of the most meaningful Christmas services I've ever attended, and I am so grateful for it. Ryan was in the choir, so I was that wife in the front row. ;) 

After church, we scurried home long enough to pack up the car and head to my parents' house for Christmas with my side of the family. Our Kansas family didn't get to come home this year, but my other sister and brother-in-law were there. I won't bore you with a thousand pictures, but here are a few!

This was the dessert board I made!

Gifts under the tree...

Ryan has a wish list, so now he'll get to make some come true!

Remember when I talked about the new clothing list I've been making to try to choose things that fit my lifestyle well? New jammies were on the list. I usually just wear ratty old t-shirts at home, and I want to look cuter for Ryan! So I got one of the sets I picked out. THEY ARE SO SUPER COMFY!!! Drawstring shorts with POCKETS and a t-shirt to match. So cute. 

Another book! This one is called Devotedly, and it's the love story of Jim and Elisabeth Elliot. (They were young missionaries many years ago and Jim and some fellow missionaries were killed by the tribe they were trying to reach. Later, Elisabeth went back to live among the tribe again - the same people who killed her husband - and they ended up becoming believers! This book was written by Jim and Elisabeth's daughter and pulls right from their love letters and journals. I can't wait to read it!) 

You know you're an adult when you not only put a clothes steamer on your list, but you are giddy to receive it!

Can't wait to try out some of these recipes over the fire pit at the lake!

I made photo books for Mom and Dad this year. This one was of the family vacation we took this summer.

This one was of Dad's 90th birthday party. He was showing it to Lexi. 

My sister got him a head lamp. It was bright!

These two were inseparable most of the day. (Largely because he kept feeding her table scraps. She never gets those except on special occasions, so she pretty much had the merriest Christmas ever.)

We left Lexi at my parents' so she could sleep for a while (after a completely overstimulating day) and we went to Christmas with Ryan's side of the family! I got baby snuggles!!!

We went back to pick up Lexi and drove home. We were worn out by the time we got home (over twelve hours later) but it was a good Christmas! 

Tenth Anniversary Collages

 I have Christmas stories for you, but I need some time to poke through all the pictures and memories before I share. So for today, how would you like to see our anniversary collages?

If you've been reading here throughout our love story, you know that on our first anniversary, we recreated some of our wedding pictures. We loved it so much that we just kept doing it year after year! A few days ago, I was finally able to make the collages from this year, so I thought I'd share them with you today! 

Ryan and I loved looking over these and remembering our anniversary trips. I'm so glad we did this and look forward to seeing what these collages look like in another 10 years! 

Sunday Sentiments

Merry Christmas, friends!

This has been one wildly strange Christmas week here in Indiana. For those of you not from this area, I'll fill you in! The big old storm arrived right on schedule Thursday evening. Ryan had just gotten home from doing some work at the new house, and the wind whipped up, sending our windchimes into a 24 hour nonstop orchestral arrangements. 

He ended up closing the office on Friday - and I already had the day off anyway, since Christmas Eve fell on Saturday - and we hunkered down for the entire day. The wind whipped like crazy outside, and a few times, I thought it was going to take part of the house with it. I can only imagine what it sounded like out in the country! We at least have the buffer of other houses around us!

We played fetch with Lexi, took naps, worked on our computers, and thankfully never did lose power. We were ready, just in case! I'd purchased food that didn't need to be cooked, we were caught up on laundry, all the things that need charged were charged, the pile-o-blankets was ready to go.

We rescheduled another Christmas. (Actually it's the same Christmas. Just postponed again.) 

But it was quite lovely to just be home together with no plans. 

Lexi and I stayed home yesterday to work on things around the house, and Ryan cautiously picked his way to the lake to make sure everything was okay over there. Thankfully, all was well, and he made it home safely for our Christmas Eve together.

But with all the unexpected, the early closures, the canceled gatherings, I am so crazy thankful for my tiny little family and our warm home. It's been a joy to share these unexpected changes in their company. It's been a joy to know we are safe with heat, power, and water when I know there are so many who long for such things. 

Perhaps your Christmas has been altered this year too, and if that is the case, I hope you are able to embrace the changes and enjoy the days in their adjusted states.

Merry Christmas, dear friends. We send much love to you today and encourage you to remember God's greatest gift that we celebrate on this day - even if this wasn't "the day."

Merry, merry Christmas!

Love,

Ryan, Bekah, Braeya, and Lexi

The Saturday Six

 

I'm writing this post a bit ahead of schedule, because I have no idea if I will lose power at home this weekend! It's been many years since Indiana was pummeled by a pre-Christmas winter storm! So hopefully at the time you read this, we are hanging in there - regardless of whether or not we have power! Be safe out there, friends!

One.

Earlier this week, I talked about travel dreams, and ours are many. My itineraries that I'd love to see take place would allow us to drive back and forth across the country several times - in north/south AND east/west routes. This route isn't one I had on my list, but it is pretty amazing! Every single national park??? I'm intrigued! (Are any of you on a quest to see all the national parks?)

Two.

This year has been a strange one for us when it comes to Christmas happenings. Between our anniversary trip and trying to make sure one of Love INC's two biggest annual projects went smoothly, our own Christmas traditions took a backseat. One night, we sat to talk about them, and it was so freeing to discuss what we've "always" done. We've been married ten years now, so it's a perfect time to make clean changes on things if necessary. Maybe I'll write more about this another time, but the short story is that we decided to let go of a few things we've done every year - because those things don't fit our lifestyle anymore. I found this post that had some great insights and permissions on changing Christmas traditions. (Wouldn't have to just be Christmas. It could be any tradition!) If you're feeling the pressure to keep things going because you HAVE to, I encourage you to read the article and maybe breathe again!

Three.

When we were in Florida, we were walking the beach near our Airbnb one day and saw a pickup with a truck camper parked alongside the road. It ended up being there most of the afternoon, and I noticed the people had their windows by the over-the-cab bed opened. I mentioned to Ryan that it wasn't a bad gig at all. While overnight parking wasn't allowed where they were, there wasn't any rule against parking there for a period of time. They literally pulled their home up to the beach and parked. Maybe they were at the beach or maybe they were taking a nap on the side of the road, with waves lapping on the shore next to them. Either way - WIN WIN!! I asked Ryan if he thought he could ever travel with a truck camper, and he said he didn't think he could. Out of curiosity, I did a search on them. I know they're fancier than you might think, but this one BLEW MY MIND. 

Four.

It has been a LONG TIME since I've been part of a cookie swap/cookie exchange/whatever you want to call it. I think I did it a time or two with my church in Marion (before I was married) but I have not done one since. But I happened upon THIS idea to do a soup swap, and my jaw dropped straight to the floor! What a great idea! Not only is it (potentially) healthier than a cookie exchange, it helps you have meals - and know whether or not you like a soup before you ask for the recipe and make a big batch! If you're looking for a fun get-together idea for January, check it out! 

Five.

It is TOO COLD (in Indiana, anyway) for outdoor fires right now. But it's not too cold for air fryers! Check out this idea for doing s'mores in an air fryer! (Don't miss the tip for how to keep your marshmallow from blowing from air circulation.) Ryan, we might need to try this!

Six.

Though I have shared this general idea on here before, I'll throw it out there again! This is a great DIY last minute gift if you think of someone who needs a quick little gift. An ice cream kit (because ice cream lovers don't take breaks just because it's cold) that you can assemble yourself! 

Sitting with Stories

Throughout this year, I've had the opportunity to tell you about some stories we've sat with for a period of time. I always ty to wait until the story is established enough (even if it isn't completed) before I share. 

Our whole year has been a series of journeys, and in each of them, we've been learning so much about ourselves (individually and as a couple), our faith and God's faithfulness, and we've even been getting some snippets of what God might have for us in the future. 

Some parts of the journeys have been so, so hard. Waiting is not a gift that comes naturally to either of us, but we've been learning to do it, and hopefully we're learning to do it better. Some parts have been so, so exciting. Watching God write stories as only He can do brings my finite-writing-heart so much joy. 

We have one more story to share, and the time seems right to do so today!

Friends, we're moving!

The number one response we get when we've shared this news in person is some version of "Didn't you just move?" (Or "What's wrong with your house?")

Yes. We just moved. Nothing is wrong with our house. I mean, after all, it has a yard now, right?

But there is a story. 

One of the perils of leaving a job where you live and work in the same space is that when you leave work, you leave your home, too.

So we moved, making our next-town-of-choice decision based on location relative to our new church and also where we thought we would be working. The market was competitive then and options were very slim. (Three houses, to be exact.) The Lord provided this house of ours to give us a place for respite and healing. He gave us an opportunity to enjoy a complete dream-come-true in living in a brand-new house that so closely matched the floor plan of the house we had wanted to build so many years ago. 

Nothing about this house was a mistake. Nothing was a disappointment (yard excluded - ha!). 

But as you know, when we settled into our new chapter of life, God ended up taking our employment in a different direction than we first thought. Ryan's job, though not a horrible commute, is a little distance from where we live. There isn't anything wrong with that. It's not a requirement for us to live right in the mix of where he works. But as he became more immersed in the role, we both realized there would be marked advantages to living closer to where he works. 

We talked about it and decided we would keep a casual eye out for an opportunity to shift closer to his work whenever the time came.

We were thinking maybe 2-3 years down the road.

Or months. Months are good, right?

The story of how it all came about is much longer than one post, but I'll give you the short version. Quite by surprise, we happened upon a small house for sale - not far from where Ryan works - and I think if you see a picture of the backyard view, I'll be saved not just a thousand words, but thousands of words.

Yes. That's a lake. 

The first year Ryan and I were married, we committed to being open to whatever ministry opportunities God wanted to entrust to us. We made that commitment at the lake. Not this lake, but the lake where Ryan's family has a cottage. 

Throughout our marriage, we've often toyed with the idea of a lake home, but alas, permanently owning two homes is not something we are able to swing, financially. (I'm not sure what it's like where you live, but in Indiana, many families do own lake cottages that they visit on summer weekends. Sometimes whole families own it together and share the usage.) When we lived at WillowBridge, we did make an offer on a lake cottage that we hoped to use as our "winter weekend home" and we were going to use it as an Airbnb the rest of the time. That fell through, which was really disappointing for us, though now I can see how God had a different plan coming, and He was protecting us from what we didn't know.

When we prepared to leave WillowBridge, we toyed with the idea of moving to "lake country" within Indiana, which would have meant moving farther north. It was the perfect time to make a move to the lake, since we had a blank slate before us. Ultimately, we felt led to move to this area, where we could have a strong and meaningful church community, so we gave God our lake house dreams and moved to non-lake country. Or so we thought. We had no idea there are three small lakes right in our area! 

It isn't lost to us that God has taken us through many ministries (both in the local church and in our vocations) and now has us in new ministries (both in our local church and in our vocations), and He has brought the opportunity for us to enjoy life on the lake...year-round. Not in a vacation-home capacity. Not in owning two homes and trying to rent one in order to make ends meet. 

The idea felt too good to be true, but it turned out to be God doing more than we could imagine.

We fell in love with the house online, and we prayed about it, asking God to clearly open or close the door for us when we went to see it in person. I secretly hoped we would hate it, so the answer would be clear.

But we loved it.

We made an offer, and I secretly hoped the owner would reject our offer, so the answer would be clear.

But he accepted it.

Then we waited for all the details to work out, and I not-so-secretly prayed that something would fall through so the answer would be clear.

And everything went through seamlessly.

Why do I always think an answer has to be no to be clear? 

And so it was that we closed on our lake home. The previous owner handed us the key and walked out the door. 

Ryan and I strolled around the house, greeting it for the first time as our home and the future of our dreams and ministries. We stood by the window and watched the water ripple under our pier. 

My phone rang, interrupting our silent joy. 

That was the moment I was offered my new job. 

In forty-five minutes flat, God gave us a lake home and gave me a job.

(Then I got in the car and drove to the dentist. He asked how I was doing, and I said, "So far, the day is extraordinary. Please keep that going!" And he did.)

All this happened several weeks ago now. I haven't told you because we have been doing some projects at the new house and prepping for a move that will take place sometime soon. (Exact date TBD.) It is already beginning to look and feel like home, and we can't want to wake up and go to sleep there every single day. We can't wait to look out over the water. (My desk has a lake view, and I'm giddy about it.)

There are many more stories to come, over time, about this change, but we hope you'll rejoice with us over this blessing. It's okay if multiple moves aren't your thing. It's okay if you think we're crazy. Just trust us that we don't feel like we made any mistakes in this home we've enjoyed for most of the year. It was God's provision until the next place was ready for us. It will be a provision for those who come behind us to make it their home. 

We do hope the lake house is a landing point for many, many years to come. We hope this is where God has us put down long-term roots. And we hope He paints many beautiful sunsets over that water!

Merry Christmas from Shafferland

 

We're in the final stretch before Christmas Day! Our Christmas celebrations have already been shaken up a bit this year because of illness in some of the gatherings (pushing us to postpone) and now we wait to see if weather takes over where illness left off! 

This year has been a little on the different side for us in terms of our traditions. We've had life-things that must be tended to in this moment, so we have not been able to do some of our favorite things - at least yet. 

But even though the year has looked a little different, it's been no less merry and marvelous. We have thoroughly enjoyed the time we've been able to sit in front of our pretty trees, enjoying the glow of the lights. We've gotten together with some friends, wrapped gifts, and sent out some cards! I thought I'd share our card here with you today! :) Consider it a mailing from Shafferland.

We are grateful for the gift of Jesus' birth and the salvation He brought to our lives. We are grateful for the story He is writing for us and the decade we've been able to share.

If your Christmas season has been the grand joy you hoped for, we celebrate with you and pray that goodness continues!! :) 

If your Christmas has been unexpected in hard ways, we send you a hug and sit with you in your hurt and disappointment.

Thank you for sharing this space with us each day. Thanks for loving us, celebrating our joys alongside us and walking with us in times of hurt!

Merry (almost) Christmas, friends. We are so thankful for you!

Finding Community

 

It's ironic that when we went to WillowBridge to work, one of the main things we were supposed to teach our tenants was the importance of building and maintaining a community of people to share life with you...yet it's the one thing we never felt like we had the time to do for ourselves.

We did try, but for one reason or another, it just didn't work. By the time we left, we had made some friends - inside and outside of work - and had found some people to share our joys and burdens as they came, but it wasn't a true, thriving community of people.

I'm sure the definition of a community looks different for everyone, but I can tell you what it means for me:

* The people who make a place for you when you're new.

* The people you can call at inappropriate hours, when you have an emergency and need someone. Also -  the people who will call you at inappropriate hours, because they know they can trust you to pick up and not be upset.

* The people who bring food to your doorstep when you're too sick to go get your own. Also - the people who aren't afraid to tell you when they need a porch drop of their own.

* The people who remember what's happening in your life and check in on you to see how life is going - whether the day is good or hard.

* The people who say they'll pray for you - and do it.

* The people who want to hang out with you for dinner or coffee. Also - the people YOU want to hang out with for dinner or coffee.

* The people you can't wait to talk to when you have exciting news to share.

The list goes on, but you get the idea.

We've had a lot of change and limbo, even since moving to Bluffton, but the one thing that has gone better than we could have imagined? Finding community. 

* From the very moment we moved here, we had an invitation to be part of a small group, and we love those people so much. We meet up a couple of times a month, and we do everything we can to make sure nothing stands in the way of small group night. We get together for a pitch-in meal and fellowship, and it's so much fun. We have told stories, heard stories, learned things that have strengthened our faith, and celebrated milestones together. 

* From the very moment we moved here, we've had a church family and Sunday School class. They've pitched in to support Ryan in Love INC. One of them made a spot for me on her salon-client roster. They've made a place for us to sit with them in class. Three of them checked in on me last week to see how my first day of work went. They talk with us before and after church. They're family now, and though there are many of them and we're still learning names, they have blessed us more than we can say.

* Thankfully we haven't needed to call anyone at an inappropriate hour since we moved here, but we've been able to call on our new neighbors to help us with things (like house-sitting while we were gone) and we've helped them with things (like projects at their house). We text back and forth and leave gifts on each others' porches. They're not just neighbors; they're friends.

* We haven't had need of porch-drops since being here, but we have people we know we could call if we did! And we've had friends who have brought us gifts when we first moved in: treats and gift cards and all manner of welcome gifts!

* Whether church friends, small group friends, or neighborhood friends, we have found people who have called or texted just because they're thinking of us and want to know how things are going. And we've had the privilege of checking in on them, too!

* So many prayers have gone both ways between us and the friends we've made since we came here. This community is full of prayer warriors!

* Just last week, we had a dinner invitation from a couple in our church. They just wanted to get to know us, so we took dessert and they made soup, and we sat and talked for so many hours. We told stories and found commonalities and had so much fun. It felt like we had known them forever, and that was a sweet feeling.

We've missed this. It feels almost like a pre-pandemic life in the world of having people around us to share life. We are grateful for these people and we hope they have found us to be for them all the things they have been for us. 

Community can be a challenge to find. I've had so many seasons of life when it didn't come easily to me. Being vulnerable enough to find people to feel comfortable with was absolutely terrifying, and sometimes I just wouldn't do it. Sometimes I tried, and it felt like those on the other side didn't want to step into my world. But oh, what a gift it is when it comes about. True community can't be forced. It just has to be. But it requires a first step to even have a chance.

I hope you have built one. Just like we taught our tenants, it really does matter. If you haven't built one, I hope the year to come affords you opportunities to do just that! 

What I've Learned...About Travel Dreams

 A few weeks ago, my friend Julie let me borrow her copy of Tsh Oxenreider's book At Home in the World. It chronicled Tsh's family's journey around the world in a year and the things they learned from the experience. I was familiar with Tsh by name, but other than some online articles, I'd never read her writing, and I really enjoyed her style. More than that, I enjoyed what I learned about travel from reading her experiences.

As you know, Ryan and I love traveling, and we have big dreams of doing more of it in the future, if the Lord makes a way for that to happen. I've spent a good chunk of this year thinking about the practical side of that, which was why Julie shared the book with me in the first place, and I've learned some things I thought I'd share with you today - especially after having just shared with you about our trip to Florida!

RV Life is for Us

Before we had an RV, I remember seeing RVs out on the road and imagining they were the best possible way to travel. Now we have one, and although we didn't take it to Florida (hello, gas prices), I stand firmly by my conviction that they are indeed the best possible travel means for those who choose road travel. On this last trip, I missed (seriously...so so much) the convenience of my own bathroom and kitchen at all times. For us, RV travel is the best way to go, and in our future, long-term travel dreams, I can't imagine going any other way.

Abby, our sweet, precious RV that we dearly love, will need to be upgraded before we begin any kind of long-term travel dreams. She's older, and while she does great for the kind of travel we have done and are able to do right now, she would not be the best choice for long-term, long-distance travel. (Plus, we both know we want a more traditional bathroom when we get to the place that we are on the road for a length of time.) Having said that, we know for sure that the size and layout we have now is perfect for the kind of travel we want to do. We are learning hands-on skills now for what we need to know in the future!

Having a Home is for Us

For many years, I thought I wanted to sell everything and travel full-time. No backup plan. Nothing to tie us down aside from a set of wheels. While I still think traveling for a large chunk of time (at a time) would suit us well, I have learned that we both need a home base. Tsh talked about that in her book as well. She loved traveling the world for a year, but at the end of that year, she was ready to come home - to a home. As I've researched and made my way through our long-term plans, I know for sure, we will want chunks of the year to be at home, in a real house that doesn't have wheels under it. We will need time to rest, think, recuperate, plan, and be - in something that belongs entirely to us. This has been a great revelation for us! (Better to learn that before you sell everything, right?) 

I used to think everything about bigger travel plans had to be either/or. Either you traveled, or you had a home. You didn't have both lives. God has helped reframe my thinking on that, and I'm grateful. 

Now is the Time to Research

I've been following an Instagram account called Under the Sycamore that features another family currently traveling the world for a year. I started following them shortly before they began the actual journey, and I learned the wife/mom had been laying out the itinerary of this trip for over four years. That made my heart leap! 

Sure, we aren't in a position right now to do long-term trips, but it doesn't mean I can't start planning. I have routes laid out already, and I've been putting travel guides on my Christmas wish list. I am already actively planning for these trips, even though they're down the road farther than I can see. I know things will change on some of those routes, with places opening and closing between now and our dreams becoming reality, but I can still do the bulk of the work! 

So if you need me in the months to come (in my spare time - whatever that is!), you can find me poring over my lists and routes. You'll find me reading guides and blog posts and itineraries and watching YouTube videos of people who have been where we hope to go!

Don't Be Afraid to Make Decisions Now to Impact the Future

As Ryan and I make decisions right now, we are doing so with the idea that in the future, we hope to travel. The places we live, the cars we drive, the investments of time and money we make - all of those things matter for a future we hope to see. There isn't a guarantee, and we know that, but we also know that if there IS a chance, and we haven't made good choices in the moment, we won't be positioned to see those dreams come true later. 

Even if others looking in from the outside don't understand what we're doing or why, I can pretty much guarantee there's a reason that might not be about the moment right in front of us!

Never Stop Dreaming

Even if I do all this work and we never get to go for real (for whatever reason), the time will be well spent. I've already learned things about our country simply by planning places within it I'd like to visit. The dreaming and learning is worth it, even if I never get to see it with my own eyes. (But I sure hope I do!) 

Whether or not travel dreams are part of your heart, I hope you spend some of your own time chasing the dreams that are there. Read. Learn. Know. Plan. Dream. It's so very good for the soul!