Surgery Brain

I've always had a ridiculously good memory about some things and a flat our ridiculous memory about others. I can recall the date on the calendar when my first boyfriend asked me to be his girlfriend, and I remember what shirt I wore when we went on our first date. I remember what word I misspelled in the elementary school spelling bee, and I remember my robe number from choir.

But if I stand up from my desk and walk to the front of the building to pick up books I've just been emailed about, you can KNOW that I will forget those books by the time I get to the front, if I so much as say hi to anyone between my desk and the front of my building. I write post it notes for just about everything - planting them on my lunch box to remind myself to grab food out of the fridge before leaving work and even leaving them in my bathroom to remind myself of a pre-coffee, pre-work chore for the next day.

All this sort of forgetfulness is normal and has happened for years.

But I promise you, since the ole gallbladder eviction, it's gotten worse. I forget things I never forget, and since the number of those things is small to begin with, this is very disconcerting.

Yesterday, you guys, I forgot my breakfast.

You need to know this about me, if you don't already. I don't forget food. Ever. I hear of these people who say things like "Oh I got so busy, I forgot to eat lunch." I don't even understand what that means. If my stomach growls, I can pretty much bet it's 12:02 p.m. and my body is about to hit rebellion. I meticulously plan my lunchbox contents every day...making certain there's a breakfast, a lunch, and two snacks. My eating schedule puts most babies to shame.

Bekah. Doesn't. Forget. Food.

And that's why I was entirely baffled, yesterday, when I maneuvered my way into work, purse and heavy work bag slung over my right shoulder, and lunch box precariously hanging on the umbrella clutched in my left hand...

...and I realized that lunch box was awfully light.

And then it hit me. I didn't pack my breakfast.

WHAT!!?!?!!?!?

This has never happened. In the history of ever!!

I had been so busy packing our lunches and getting dinner in the crock pot, that I completely spaced my breakfast.

I texted Ryan to tell him, and later that morning, he wrote back to see how I was surviving without food. I responded, "Did you actually think I would skip a meal?"

I packed myself in my car and drove to McDonald's to get a breakfast meal and two Diet Cokes...one for Amy and one for Lynne.

It was raining, so I hustled to the car and scurried down the road. I should back up and add that I REFUSE to go inside at this McDonald's, because a few months back, as Amy and I were enjoying a lunch there one day, we were accosted by a man I can only assume was either on drugs or off meds...or both...who ended up lashing out at us, unloading an accusation that I was a "pregnant white liar bleep" - before Amy and I vacated the premises in a hurry.

So I scooted up to the drive-thru and ordered my meal and my two Diet Cokes. I watched them display on the screen, pulled around, and the nice lady at the money window said, "You had the burrito meal?"

I nodded and said, "And the Diet Cokes." I paid and pulled up to the food window.

The guy working said, "Burrito meal?"

"And two Diet Cokes," I said.

"No." He said.

Um, okay. We can argue about it if you want.  And we did - back and forth, until finally he said, "It's not on your ticket. You didn't pay for them. If you want them, you'll have to come inside."

You can imagine my joy as I pulled into a parking place, hauled my purse into the restaurant with me, and prayed that yelling guy wasn't in the gaggle of people eating in the middle of the place.

I went to the front and said to the manager, "I was in the drive thru and I ordered two Diet Cokes, but he said I didn't pay for them. So I need two Diet Cokes."

She must have sensed the rain-soaked, breakfast-deprived desperation in my eyes, because she handed me two cups and said, "It's on me."

First of all, THANK YOU, DEAR LADY. I so appreciated the grace.

Secondly. Can you work the drive-thru on rainy days so this kind of grace can avoid raindrops?

Got their drinks, ran through the rain back to my car, and went to work. Again.

While I ate, I Googled "Memory loss after surgery."

Know what? It's a real thing. They {and THEY refers to a medical article, not Yahoo Answers} say it can last three months or more in some people. Side effect of anesthesia.

I was both relieved and defeated.

So for the next two months (or more), I plan to blame all forgetfulness on the surgery.

That's me.

Now...my husband, on the other hand. I'm not sure what he's blaming.

He made our coffee last night:

He forgot to add the grounds.

Small World, Big Impact: The Husband

Not MY husband, although keep reading...this one comes full circle!

I love revisiting these little snippets I wrote back in 2002, because I like to see how the Bekah of then was impacted by people just living their every day. People who had no idea the girl in front of them was taking mental notes.

And to this guy...this nameless guy in my mind, I owe HUGE thanks.

It happened while I was at Burger King having lunch with my mom. {Proof positive that such things really can be life changing in a good way.} I was in a hurry, because I only had an hour before I had to be back to work, and she and I had a lot to discuss in that hour! We sat down in the non-smoking section {Whoa!!! Those still existed as recently as 2002??} and right as I was about to plunge into my account of the morning's drama, Mom spoke to a man sitting at a table behind us.

I didn't know who he was, but he exchanged pleasantries with Mom, and before she moved back to our conversation, she asked him how his wife was doing. I could see his face out of the corner of my eye, and he broke into a huge smile as he answered, "Beautiful as always!"

I stopped, Whopper Junior halfway to my mouth. {And FYI, it takes quite a bit to get me to actually STOP eating.} I turned and looked at the man fully. It was obvious from the look on his face that he was as absolutely in love with that woman as he could be. Mom made a comment about what a sweet woman this mysterious wife was, and he rushed to agree with her.

I don't remember one more thing about lunch that day. Not one thing. But I remember thinking that when I'm old, I hope my husband tells someone that I'm beautiful. And I hope he says it even when I'm not with him to prompt the maritally correct response. I also wish I could have met this man's wife to see firsthand what kind of an amazing woman she was.

I was a good decade or more away from even HAVING a husband when this event took place, which was probably a fact I was better off not knowing. But in those days, I spent a lot of time observing marriages all around me. Some of my friends had been married for years but still acted like newlyweds. They preferred being with their spouses and talking lovingly of them when they were apart. Other people seemed to need a reminder that they even had a spounse.

Even in my singleness, in my observations, in my dreaming, I knew people thought I had unrealistic expectations for my someday-husband. But I wrote these words back in 2002: "I don't think it's too much to hope for a man who is hopelessly in love with me forever. A marriage like that takes work. And I know it will have its difficulties and trials. But if we can work to make it last, I hope that I can someday hear through the grapevine that my husband was telling everyone how crazy about me he still is, even though I'm old and falling apart."

Today I'd like to thank the gentleman in Burger King, nameless to me though he is, for becoming "the man whose wife is still beautiful." I want to thank him for saying that about her out loud, in a burger joint, to an acquaintance and her daughter. I want to thank him for loving and respecting his wife. And I want to thank him a thousand times over for instilling some hope in a girl like me that there could still be men like him out there in this world.

Today I'd also like to thank a Mr. Ryan Shaffer for being just like that man. I might not be old, but I think the Great Dental Event of 2014 and the Great Gallbladder Eviction of 2015 are proof that the falling apart is well underway. Ryan, thank you for making this dream of mine from a decade before our marriage...come true. I do hear through the grapevine that you brag on me when I'm not around. You tell me I'm beautiful when I'm standing in front of you, and you tell others when I'm not around.

You're proof that my dreams weren't unrealistic. Let's be the next generation of that man and his wife for all those crazy dreamers coming behind us. Let's make a big impact on our small world!

92 County Tour: Howard

Yesterday I showed you the personal side of our Howard County tour...and today I'm bringing you the rest of our fun day!

First, the official county tour chalkboard photo:

We were standing on the porch of a really old log cabin at the Howard County Fairgrounds. The fair is held in Greentown each year, and it's one of our favorite things. Over the years, a number of small historic log cabins have been relocated to the fairgrounds - and together, they're called Pioneer Village.

Here's another one!

 There's also a little church out there - and a few years ago, my friend Ronda's nephew got married right there outside that church!

The most recent addition is the relocation and restoration of this historic round barn. There have been several wedding receptions here, and actually, Ryan and I contemplated using this as our reception site, but since our reception was in March, we figured the lack of heating might cause some issues. We still think this is such a gorgeous building, though.

After we left Greentown, we headed to Kokomo, which is where Ryan works.

We went to Highland Park, which is a lovely place in the city. I actually had some of my senior pictures taken next to this very bridge!

This bridge {the Vermont Covered Bridge} was originally constructed in 1875 in the town of Vermont, about 5 miles east of Kokomo. After surviving floods, arson, and other issues, it needed to be replaced in its original location with a higher, wider bridge. In 1957, it was moved into the park!

I do love a covered bridge.

Also in the park are a couple of other cool things. We stopped by to visit them, but my pictures aren't that great, because they're completely enclosed and I was getting a HORRIBLE glare off the glass.

First up: The Sycamore Stump:

This tree was in the west end of the county and stood over 100 feet tall before a storm knocked it down and the stump was hollowed out. In 1916, it was moved to the park, and was measured at 57 feet in circumference. They also counted the tree to be over 800 years old at that time. That is one huge tree!

Also in the park is Old Ben:

He was a steer who, when he died at the age of 8 in 1910, weighed 4720 pounds. {I wanted my picture next to him. He made me feel better!!}

After our park visit, we headed to the Treasure Mart...this really cool place Ryan wanted to take me:

He found a tandem bike right away:

Me? I was just shopping:

Another of Ryan's finds in the Treasure Mart: a mattress he sewed when he worked at Holder Mattress. He recognized his own work:

We made a couple more stops by some of Kokomo's main attractions. We went by the Sieberling Mansion, which you can also tour for a small fee, but we didn't do the tour. Still...isn't this a COOL house?

And it's not a trip to Kokomo unless you make your way past the giant praying mantis. Don't ask. We don't know. But it does have its own Facebook page.

We caught a quick lunch at Louie's Coney Island. We first went there in our very first month of marriage - on our way to pick up our first Christmas tree. It was one of Ryan's favorite places, and he wanted to introduce me. Not quite a year after that, a tornado ripped through Kokomo and destroyed Louie's. They rebuilt, though, and this was our first time back:

And our last stop for the day? The coffee shop, of course!!

We chose Big Ben Coffee, which was in a little strip mall.

It was just darling inside - all set up with tiny little living rooms - so cozy.

We were kind of warm, so we opted for frappes - and they were gone in no time!

So that was our day! Thanks, Howard County, for being great hosts....for our whole lives!

92 County Tour: Howard {The Personal Side}

This past Saturday, Ryan and I knocked another county off our see-every-county-in-Indiana tour. I'd initially planned a different county for this month, but we had an errand we needed to run in Kokomo, where Ryan works, and we hadn't yet done the county where Kokomo lies, so we decided to just make it our official Howard County day!!

I have two posts for this one, because this county tour took a bit of a different spin for us. We were both born in Howard County and we grew up there...and until he married me, Ryan lived there. So today I'm going to tell you the personal side of it, and then tomorrow I'll hit the normal side of it!

We started out the day by having breakfast at the Home Town Family Restaurant, with our friend, Randy.

Randy used to rent an apartment from Ryan, when he lived in his old house, and they've been friends forever. It had been a really long time since we got to hang out with Randy, so it was a fun couple of hours of catching up and talking about life and the future!

After breakfast, we did a quick return to our roots...starting with the elementary school we both attended:

The school has undergone a number of additions and updates since we went there, but this sign was right there when we walked these very halls! {And for those of you who didn't know, my mom was a teacher's aide in first grade from the time I went into second grade until after I graduated from college, and she actually had Ryan in her class!}

We also stopped by our old high school...we both graduated from here:

Ryan, if you didn't know, was a wrestler in high school. He won sectionals his junior year, so his picture is still on a wall outside the gym. We were able to get inside the school to see it {thank you, Saturday sports practices!!}...so here you go! The Ryan I knew in high school!

I insisted on a new picture of Ryan now with Ryan then:

Also in the school, we found the plaque for an award started by the local ministerial alliance back in 1993 in my Dad's name. It's given to a senior who exhibits Christian character in a high school setting:

After we left Greentown, we headed to Kokomo, and there we found a really important spot in our lives: the hospital where we were both born!

So there it is!! The Shaffer side of our Howard County tour! Tomorrow I'll be back with the rest of the fun we had on Saturday!

Winter Jam 2015

I worked Winter Jam again this year; my third year in a row to work this event. The first year I worked, it was on a Sunday in January, and the crowd was so crazy big that they ended up turning hundreds of people away. People had waited in the freezing cold for hours and then couldn't get in. It was a heartbreaker! Beginning last year, they moved the event to a Thursday night in March, and the crowds were a lot more manageable, it seemed.

The bad part about a weeknight event is that Ryan can't come to those. By the time he gets off work and makes it to Fort Wayne {almost a 2 hour drive}, it's so late, and then we have two cars up there...and it's just a lot of time and gas wasted on a work night. But THIS year, we had a special blessing in that our friends Mike and Angie drove up from our area after Ryan got off work, so he caught a ride up with them and then was able to drive home with me. HUGE blessing!! I'd worked all day and we didn't get home until close to midnight, so I was just so glad to have him with me!

Not surprisingly, I took over 300 photos that night, so I hope you have a lot of time! JUST KIDDING! I'm just picking a few of my faves to show you:

For some reason, I didn't get a picture of Ken, who also worked with us that night, but here are my work buds: Dana and Ron. Apparently it was my first time with a camera and I didn't know where to look. LOL!!!

I had never heard of the group Veridia before, but I did get this pretty great picture of the drummer and his hair!

Two years ago at Winter Jam, I saw Blanca for the first time, when she was part of Group 1 Crew. This year she was there as a solo artist. I really like her voice and enjoyed hearing her on her own!

Newsong hosts Winter Jam, and every year, they do Arise, My Love. And every year, I cry. I love that song so very much. And I think now that Winter Jam falls right before Easter for us...it is even more significant.

It was my first time to hear Building 429 in person:

Family Force 5 - brought their trampolines! Work out AND sing: it's how you get it all done while on the road!

I love this one: the fan was feeling the love!

Blanca came out to sing with Building 429 as well!

Jeremy Camp was my favorite of the night. I really, really appreciate him and I love his music. 

I've seen her in concert several times before, but Francesca Battistelli was part of Winter Jam this year. And she brought bubbles!!!

The final act of the night was Skillet. So funny...my friend Faith came and brought her kids specifically to SEE Skillet. I only made it through one song before I had to leave, because the crazy strobe lights were making me sick. I think I may be a little too southern gospel to fully appreciate the pyro/strobe light world. But Skillet definitely has talent - and I know the crowd was crazy happy to see them!

 It was a full house - and so encouraging to see so many people from so many generations worshiping together!

My very handsome date...so happy to see him:

And here we are with our friends Mike and Angie - who brought him up to Fort Wayne:

And one of my favorite parts of intermission...seeing my friends! I got to meet new friends and see old friends, like Elisa {we forgot a picture!!!} and Faith and her kids!

All in all, a very fun night - and a very LATE night! :) Winter Jam 2015 in the books!