Couples' Bucket List (Part 1 - Checked!)

 

The other day, while scrolling through Pinterest, I found a list of 100+ fun things to do for couples, so I read through to see how fun Ryan and I have been in the last ten years! I was excited to learn we haven't been entirely boring. I was also excited to find some ideas that looked really fun for future dreams, but we'll come back to that for another day. 

Here are some of the things we have done that we've loved and I would recommend if you're looking for date ideas! I'm just marking off things on the first half of the list, so this doesn't go one forever!

1. Have date night at least once a week.

We did this pretty much until the pandemic, actually. We were super careful about it, but when the quarantine came, our options were limited. I think we did a good job of dating at home during that time, but our official "date-night-out" adventures came to an end. Then we went to WillowBridge (during the pandemic) and it still didn't happen. We are returning to this now and it is so fulfilling! Even if we keep it low key, we still enjoy our dedicated time together, and I think this idea is so important! This (really terrible) picture of us is from our last date out, which was a breakfast date to the Pancake House! It was early. I needed to wash my hair. We both needed coffee. LOL!

2. Plan an adventure at least once a month.

I feel like we were really good at this until the pandemic, too! All those county dates were adventures. Last summer, our camping trips were our adventures. We LOVE planning adventures, and we've had some good ones. We are learning our new groove with this one, with Lexi in the mix. But we are getting back to it - and getting back to our county tours, too. We have missed those! This picture was from our adventure this month: to the fair!

4. Fill and bury a relationship time capsule and open it in the future.

Okay so this is kind of a cheat. We did not make a relationship time capsule, and we will not be able to open it in the future. But we DID make a time capsule when we lived in our Marion house, and we hid it in the house! Do you remember this? If you've read here many years, you just might! We replaced the carpet in the house, and when we pulled up the old carpet, we discovered the first step onto the stairway opened up and had a little cove under it. So we put together a time capsule and hid it in there for a future owner to find. I have no idea if the guy who bought the house from us found it or not! But it was fun to make - and we did write about our relationship in it! 

8. Run a sporting event and raise money for charity.

Again, a slight cheat. We did not RUN the sporting event, but for a couple of years, we helped with a golf scramble that Lynne Ford's husband ran to raise scholarship money! I was the photographer, and Ryan helped with registration and drove my golf cart so I could zip around the course and take the pictures. We had a lot of fun doing that scramble!! Lynne's husband isn't in charge of it anymore, so we haven't done this in several years. But it was a fun date for sure!

14. Kiss atop a Ferris Wheel at sunset.

We did not kiss atop the Ferris Wheel, but we did have a funny adventure on one! I had always wanted to ride one, so one year at the fair, Ryan took me. The line was long, and they put us in a car with two kids we had never met! There went making out at the top, right! Here is the story of how the kids almost gave me a heart attack mid-ride! (At least we did get a picture on the Ferris Wheel!)

22. Take a road trip to each other's high schools and make out on campus. 

Well, when you went to the same high school, and you live pretty close to it for most of your marriage, this may be a lackluster idea. And we did not make out on campus - ever! But back when we did the Howard County Tour, we did visit both the elementary and high school where we attended. And we got a picture with the elementary! (And it was fun to go back to both buildings and talk about our memories there. 

25. Re-enact the famous scene from Titanic in as many places as you can for a whole year and photograph it each time.

Another slight cheat. We did not do this multiple times for a full year, but we did do it once! We were serving at a women's retreat and they had a scavenger hunt challenge. All the women on the retreat divided up into teams and had to complete challenges around the property. Reenacting the scene was one of the challenges, so we did it! 

26. Dress up and pose as a celebrity couple in Hollywood.

Several years ago, we attended a red-carpet movie event - in Fort Wayne! It was for a Hallmark movie called For Better or For Worse. It was based on a book written by DiAnn Hunt, who passed away before the move was released. Her friends and family did the red-carpet event to celebrate her life! We dressed up and walked the red carpet and felt so very Hollywood. It was a fun night - I think even for Ryan. (We all know he totally did this out of love for me.)

31. Buy your dream house together.

Remember a few weeks ago when I told you about the house we dreamed of building (years ago)? We had to let go of the dream because we found out zoning laws had changed and we could no longer build on the land we owned. We had picked out a house we wanted to put on the land, and after we moved in here, I realized this house is almost exactly like the dream we had picked out! So it sure feels to me like we've done it! (This is a picture of us with our Realtor the day we closed on our house!)

38. Visit every single town and city in your home state or country.

Do our county tours count for this? We started in 2014 and I really thought we would have been through all 92 counties by now. I did not foresee some of the obstacles (the months of Ryan's mom's illness, the pandemic, etc.) that have slowed us down, but we have LOVED this project and intend to complete it!

40. Establish a new tradition as a couple.

We have a lot of traditions we love! I love them all and am sure I can't even think of all of them right now. Monthivesraries...recreating 10 of our wedding pictures every year on our anniversary...getting Christmas ornaments as souvenirs to tell the stories of our year and reading the story of every ornament as we put it on the tree...so much fun!

Sunday Sentiments

Yesterday was a delightful, perfect kind of Saturday. We had much to do, but little of it required an appointment outside the house, so we were free to accomplish our tasks on our own time, and I loved it. 

In the afternoon, Ryan went outside to clean up scraggly-looking areas in the yard, and I headed into the office to do some writing and Bible study. And it was from that time that my thoughts for today were born. I don't have anything earth-shattering to share, but if I needed the reminder, I'm guessing maybe someone out there needs it too, so I shall share it!

My writing prompt for Scripture was based on Ephesians 6:11-12, which say, "Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places."

When we lived at WillowBridge, I did a long study on the armor of God, and I plastered the verses for each piece of armor around our apartment, because the spiritual warfare in that place was THICK.

It made a lot of sense, actually. The young adults we worked with came to us from all sorts of backgrounds. Some had more church exposure than others. But all of them were caught up in things of the world. It was what they knew. For many of them, it was how their families had lived, and it certainly was how their friends and circles of influence lived. They were consumed by curiosity, at the very least, and sometimes even dabbling (or more) in activities that certainly weren't helpful or affirming. And in some cases, those habits were destructive and very evil in nature. 

We worked patiently with them, trying to teach them why some of these things were harmful and how to find other ideas and activities to fill their days, their investments, and their thoughts. But twenty or more years of one way of thinking usually isn't undone overnight, so it was a slow, slow process of change - if they even wanted to change. Some didn't.

But because we lived and worked in the same building, I know that the sinful struggles around us were permitted entrance into the place where we lived. Those rulers and authorities and powers and forces were alive and well in that place, and we could sense it. I can't fully explain it except to say I knew we were always, always, always in a spiritual fight, even in our own home. 

So I studied the armor of God. I prayed for each piece over myself and Ryan - even the pets, actually - to live day by day. It was, without a doubt, the deepest, hardest, most consistent spiritual warfare I have ever known in my life. 

I put on the full armor of God to be able to breathe. To be able to move. To live. 

But yesterday, as I wrote about the armor and thought back to those days, I was struck by the truth that I don't need it any less, simply because I now live in a home where we daily invite the presence of the Holy Spirit and feel Him surrounding us. Yes, the relief of warfare is noticeably different in our present home compared to our last one, but it isn't some sort of magical home base, immune to warfare. 

The wrestling may not feel as intense or frequent, but maybe it's just that I'm not showing up for battle like I should. Maybe I need to be more aware of Satan's subtleties and how he sneaks in when I'm not looking. Maybe the previous suffocation of it all was actually to my benefit because I was aware of the fight before me. 

Maybe I'm just running around out here without my armor on, unaware of how many flaming arrows of the enemy are being thrown my way.

My days need to begin with the full armor. FULL armor. Not the pieces that feel prettiest or most comfortable that day, but the FULL armor of God that can protect me from every attack - the ones I can see and the ones I cannot see. 

May I not become lazy and comfortable. That is the biggest threat of all. 

The Saturday Six

 

We noticed at the store this week that school supplies are clogging the main aisles already! While I'm with everyone else who isn't ready for summer to end, I really do love school supplies, so I'm not mad about sales! :) But let's continue to embrace summer while we can, alright? Here are some ideas for hanging onto summer as long as we can!

One.

Ryan and I don't drink alcohol, which is our personal preference and conviction, but it doesn't mean that we don't enjoy fun, fancy drinks! (Yes, we do drink things besides water and coffee.) I found this list of a BUNCH of cold summer-related drinks, and none of them contain alcohol. They're pretty, many of them are fruity, and they're fun, different, and easy to make. So if you're in need of some fun chilled drinks for these hot days, check out these ideas! 

Two.

Our church is having an ice cream social soon - and I am super excited about it. (Brings back memories of the time we had ice cream socials at summer camp, where the ice cream was served in gutters. Clean, food-prepped gutters, of course, but still gutters. You just pulled up a chair and grabbed a section for yourself! It was pre-pandemic.) Anyway!! I'm not sure much says "summer" more than ice cream, so it seems appropriate to share this idea for an ice cream sundae board. Looks fun for family or friends. If you do this, please consider me a friend and invite me! 

Three.

We learned this year that the fastest way to meet EVERYONE in your neighborhood is to get a dog. We have met a TON of people in our area just from taking Lexi out on walks. People want to meet puppies. There is one little section of a street with a couple of couples who just LOVE her and even bought special treats just for her. One evening, one of the couples invited us around to the back of their house to see what they'd been doing to renovate their deck. While we were back there, they showed us their outdoor movie screen and said they love watching movies outside during the summer. I do think it's a fun idea, for sure, but if you don't have the budget for a big fancy retractable screen - what about this DIY idea? It's much more cost effective and probably shows a movie just as well! 

Four.

If you need some inspiration for summer scents that rely on essential oils rather than candles, here are some blend ideas for your diffuser! The best part is, you don't have to worry about open flames or extra heat - and all the scents are natural instead of artificial! The smells of summer really can be more than fertilized fields! :) 

Five.

They say you eat with your eyes first, so I don't see how this idea could be anything but a wonderful start to a snack (or meal). Rainbow veggie pinwheels. Such vibrant color - and the benefits of veggies in there, too! While the gardens and farmers markets are full of fresh produce, give this idea a try! I think it looks so delicious!

Six.

And finally...a fruit-filled breakfast that is healthy, filling, and doesn't require heating up the stove. All the perfect things for summer! If you love fruit pizza, check out this idea!

Currently...

 It's Friday!! Hope you all have had a good week and are looking forward to a restful (or fun...or both!) weekend! I thought I'd do a currently post today - just for fun!

Currently I'm...

...enjoying having Ryan in the house again in the evenings and having a little bit more freedom to leave home. Why is this, you ask?? It all has to do with the yard, but multiple reasons factor into this newfound enjoyment. First, we actually had several days of rain, so our yard isn't as parched as it had been. Last week brought several rainy days for us, and we appreciated each one so much. Secondly, we were able to purchase some hose timers, which allow us to have a little bit more freedom to be gone for a few hours in the evening if we so desire. We're not to the point where we can take a trip, but we're able to at least go for dinner! And finally, our yard is actually growing! That reseed Ryan did took off so much better than the original planting, and we have some grass! We also have some weeds and some bare spots, but it is OH so much better than it was. We are abundantly grateful for this blessing, and I am enjoying every minute of having Ryan inside with me in the evenings. 

...having fun planning our tenth anniversary. I'm probably about a third of the way through the planning, and it's so much fun. I love researching the locations, the restaurants, the activity options, and now I'm piecing together the itinerary. This is one of my favorite things to do, and it has been a joy to work on. We are both excited for our celebration!

...hoping to see some very specific answers to a handful of prayers I've been praying lately. God has been nudging me to be specific in my prayers, and as silly as it may sound, it's a scary thing for me. I'm one who tends to pray very generically for general big pictures, but I am working hard to pray over specific needs. There are a couple that are short timeframe needs, and I'm placing my hope in the Lord to meet them! 

...picking out some new clothes for a long-term wish list. I told you a few days ago in a blog that I had taken the Putting Me Together master class about how to put together a wardrobe that works. I learned so much in that class about the styles and colors of clothing that work best for me - and the needs I have for the outfits I own. (My needs have changed a lot in the last few years.) I've realized that the majority of what I own is actually pretty old - much of it between 5-10 years or even more - and a refresh wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. I want to be very careful and selective about what I choose, so I've been making a wish list! It's been a lot of fun!

...using new skills at work! Love INC rebranded with a new logo and fonts and colors, so we are trying to make all new publications and signs. I've been learning to use Canva and to be creative in ways I've never had to be at work before. It was daunting at first, and sometimes it still is, but I'm also having a great time with it. I appreciate the freedom he gives me to try new things. I'm learning I can do things I didn't know I could do! 

So that's what's happening here. How about you? 

A Date to the Fair!

 

You may or may not know this little tidbit, because I'm not sure I've ever blogged about it, but back before Ryan and I started dating, I told him that the two guys I had dated never officially asked me out on a first date. Obviously we had gone on those dates, but they just sort of happened on the fly, and I was never officially and properly asked out on a date. It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of life, but it was one of those little details that I longed for. 

He didn't forget, and when he asked me out on our first date, he called me up and specifically asked me out on the date. He said he wanted me to know what it was like to be asked out on purpose and with purpose. I loved that so much! Though we often plan our dates together now, he will still, upon occasion, plan a surprise date for me and ask me out - just like the olden days. :) 

Sunday, as we drove home from his nephew's birthday party, he asked me out again. He said he thought it would be fun to take Wednesday off work and travel back to our home county to attend the fair and watch our niece and nephews show their hogs. 

I know for sure we haven't been to the fair in two years, because we didn't go either year we were at WillowBridge. I can't remember if we went the last year we lived in Kokomo, or if that week got away from us and we didn't get there. I'll have to look in the scrapbook. We both love to go, and we didn't think it would happen for us this year, but he made it happen! It meant so much to me that he would use a day off to invest in us. 

So yesterday morning we got up early and headed back to Greentown. The hog show started at 8 a.m. so we missed the first round, but we got there in time to meet the kiddos' pigs and watch them show in the second round. 

(My friend Amber met up with us for a little bit, so she got in on the picture fun. And that is a fried mushroom Ryan has.) 

I went one time a few years ago (without Ryan, because he was working that day) to see our niece show her pig, but I did not grow up doing 4H, and I know NOTHING about pigs, so Ryan had to walk me through what any of the following pictures meant. I still may not understand. 

I am pretty sure I can still smell the animal barn in my hair. :) 

He's too little for 4H right now, but he'll get there!

We also went around to look at all their other projects. I think among the three kids and all the entries, there were about 18 projects to see: cakes, sewing, circuit boards, model trucks, posters, and more. They had done a really nice job! 

My favorite fair date!

We ate together with his family for lunch, and then after all the showing festivities ended, we took a stroll through the midway and some other parts of the fairgrounds.

Benefits of going during the day? It's pretty empty! We were in the midway before the rides opened, and it was just us!

Drawbacks of going during the day? SO HOT!!!! It ended up being hotter than the forecast said. Thank goodness for the occasional air conditioned building to cool down! And we took tons of water with us to stay well hydrated. 

We did get an elephant ear, but we got it to go (and ate it at my parents' house) so we failed to get a picture of it. It really did happen, though!

It was such a fun day. Ryan grew up spending all day (and night) every day at the fair with his family. They were a 4H family through and through, and the fair was their family vacation every summer. I didn't grow up going THAT much, but Mom did take me every year, so it's something I really enjoy as permanent fixture tradition.

Yesterday would have been Allen's (Ryan's step-dad's) birthday, so in memory of him and in honor of Ryan's history with 4H, I will post this picture that his mom always had hanging in their home. It's just a few years old.

Unlikely Ministers

 

I'm borrowing inspiration and a few words today from Kelly Stamps, who hasn't blogged in a while, but she's sharing thoughts over on Instagram. I would guess that most of you who read here have also read her blog at some point in time, so you are generally familiar with her. 

A couple of days ago, she wrote the following on Instagram:

"If you ask me who has ministered to me the most - I'm probably not going to name a pastor or a well known Bible teacher. I'm going to tell you with tears in my eyes that it was nursery workers who never got any glory but who held my babies and loved on them so I could go to church or Bible study. Ms. Gail was one of these. Worked in the nursery for what seemed like 100 years. She was grumpy (and if you knew her you know I mean that endearingly). She liked things her way. She fed babies boxes of graham crackers way too early to so many first time mom's horror. She hated the name Hollis and she let me know it. And my kids loved her. And so did I. She passed away today and I'm pretty sure God told her 'well done'. She had no social media followers. Didn't write a book. Never preached a sermon. But she made an impact on the kingdom for sure just like so many unspoken heroes in rocking chairs in church nurseries everywhere."

I cried when I first read it, though I have no idea who Ms. Gail is, because I LOVED the reminder that the quiet faithful ones are every bit as impactful for eternity as the ones who stand on a platform every week. 

I have had Ms. Gails in my life, and I am richer for every single one of them.

* For the ones who bravely taught children's Sunday School every single week. When I was growing up, teachers committed to a year at a time. They didn't rotate every quarter or month. When they said yes, they made a huge commitment, and they showed up. Because of them, I know the books of the Bible in order and how to look up chapters/verses and how to pray out loud in front of a group.

* For the ones who also bravely signed up to teach VBS every summer. And play games with a bunch of energetic kids. And do crafts. And make snacks.

* For the ones who let me take my own turn working the church nursery when I was just a teenager and wanted to serve in a way that fit my skills. (For the ones who were willing to sign up to work WITH me. I'm sure I was a trial.)

* For the ones who encouraged me to join the church choir even though I had no particular musical ability. They stood by me (literally...probably painfully) and also taught me things about music that I hadn't learned in piano lessons.

* For the ones who encouraged me when I started teaching children's classes during midweek services. They made a point to seek me out and tell me the things I did well. 

* For the ones who stood up in church to share their testimony, even though public speaking scared them. They taught me God is faithful in the lives of the normal, everyday people around me.

* For the ones who prayed with me at the altar during prayer services. They took time to care about what mattered to a kid. 

* For the ones who, though separated from me in age by several decades, became my actual friends and taught me gobs of wisdom through everyday conversation. God bless senior citizens who want to befriend teenagers. It is NOT for the faint of heart.

If you are one of these, please know today that you matter so very much, and your ministry is critical to the future of God's children on this earth and then to the eternal Kingdom of God. Even if no one ever sees what you do, even if you never get recognized as the volunteer of the week, and even if you think you have wildly failed at your attempt to serve, YOU MATTER. (And you probably did NOT wildly fail at your attempt. I can nearly guarantee it.)

Earthly accolades are nice, but God's "well done" is the only one that matters.

Thank you, unlikely ministers in my life. Thank you for every sacrifice you made, every step you took outside your comfort zone, and every risk you took. You shaped me. I would not be who I am without you.

And for you? How about thanking an unlikely minister in your life?

Family Day!

Yesterday I told you about my trip to the flower patch on Sunday night, but we had already had a full day before I ever saw any flowers!

During our WillowBridge years, we really weren't able to participate much in family birthday parties (or holidays). Yes, we could choose our own days off, but we did so pretty far in advance, because we learned if we didn't, it became almost impossible to find days to take off. Usually by the time we found out about a party, our schedule was set, and we had picked the wrong days. :) So we're trying to be a bit more present now that we have a more regular schedule again. 

Sunday was our nephew's birthday party, and I realized that it was his party we attended two years ago literally on our way out of town to begin our job at WillowBridge. We had packed our car, driven to Ryan's sister's house for the party, and then rolled into Grabill and moved into our temporary apartment that same day. I'm not sure we made it to anything else until this past Sunday, so it was a full-circle moment!

We asked my parents if they wanted to hang out with Lexi while we went to the party, because it didn't seem like a good idea to take a puppy into a 4 year old's birthday party. Can you even imagine the amount of food that would have been issued under the table (and some of it not dog-appropriate)? I knew there would be tons of kids at the party, too, and it just seemed like a lot of chaos - for them and for Lexi. Dad jumped at the chance to watch her, and we were thankful for it.

Lexi was SO excited to see Dad, and he was SO excited to see her!

We were like true parents, trucking in with a litter box, a bed, a toybox, and a bag full of anything she could possibly need. (And her lunch. And her snack. And her water bowl.)

My biggest fear was that she would get underfoot of one of my parents while they walked around the house, trip them, and someone would break a hip. Yes, I seriously worried about it. 

But alas, I went to the party, and we had fun with Ryan's family! Here are some pictures from our day! 

Ryan's mom passed away in 2019, as you know, but her sister, Aunt Ruthie, asked if she could get a picture with all four kids. It was a really good picture! Blogger was kind enough to throw all these out of order, but it's okay. 

We got to meet our new nephew. He's a sweetie!

The birthday boy blowing out the candles of the cake you'll see in a minute. :) 

Listening to his happy birthday song!

Oh hey! I got to meet the baby, too! :) 

There's that cake!

Ryan and Aunt Ruthie. She's so sweet. 

And then I found this one on Aunt Ruthie's Facebook page. I forgot she took it! 

All the time we were at the party, Mom was kind enough to text us updates from the Lexi-palooza. She was having a great time playing with her toys, eating treats, and walking around the house with Dad.

(By the way - we know she looks like a shaggy old man. She was due for a groom on July 1, but her groomer had surgery! So the next available appointment is still a month out yet. Ryan may experiment with some trimming, but for now, she's a bit bedraggled.)

SO! Here's a story for you. Remember my worst fear come true about Lexi staying at my parents' house? We stayed at the birthday party for a couple of hours and then came to pick her up so we could get back home for the flower patch fun. 

When I walked in the door of my parents' home, I found my Dad ON THE FLOOR, not moving. And Lexi was beside him. I was like WHAT HAPPENED HERE!?!?!?!!?!? Mom said, "Well I sent you a text. Didn't you get it?" Um no!!!

Yeah. They were napping. NAPPING!!! Dad got down on the floor to nap with the dog, and that's how I found them. He is going to be NINETY in three months! I was beyond relieved to find out he had gotten down there voluntarily, and I was incredibly impressed with how well he got back up in the chair. No help! 

After everyone was awake and my heart had somewhat resumed a normal rhythm, we gave Dad his Father's Day gift. (I think I mentioned it on the blog, but Mom and Dad had pretty bad colds on Father's Day, so we canceled our get-together. This was the first we had seen him since to give him his gift.) We had gotten him a framed picture of the first time he met Lexi, and he LOVED it. 

It was a good day with both sides of the family! And Lexi slept all the way home, so she must have had a lot of fun!