The Hygge Happiness Date

Not ready to be done celebrating just yet? Need some new holiday options? We have you covered! We have a whole list of things you can commemorate starting TODAY. Here you go! (Oh! And don't miss us reliving high school typing class. That's a gem.)

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And now...on to today's stories: 

Though we seem to be living in a season of not really being able to make concrete plans, I do have a dream of spending 2019 exploring some new things we've not experienced before here in our very own hometown. Like many of you, we visit a variety of places in our town, but we tend to always travel the same circuit. Surely there are restaurants we haven't tried and stores where we haven't shopped, right?

I decided we'd kick off this adventure by attending First Friday last week. I know they're becoming more popular, but if your town/city doesn't have one, here's what it is. It takes place, as you might guess, on the first Friday of the month, and it typically centers around the downtown area. Businesses stay open late, some have special sales, food trucks might show up, and it's just fun.

We've had every intention of going to Kokomo's First Friday several times, but it seems like every first Friday, we end up busy and can't go. I asked Ryan if he could pencil me in for a First Friday date this past weekend, and that's exactly what we did! Kokomo always has a theme for their First Fridays, and January's theme was called Hygge Happiness. (Hygge is a Danish word that doesn't have an adequate English translation, but it basically means coziness.)

Unfortunately it wasn't TOTALLY cozy. Why? Well, I'm pretty sure the rest of Kokomo stayed home. Sigh. Seriously??? Even though Friday was CRAZY warm for Indiana in January, and the night was perfectly clear from any kind of wind or precipitation, the streets were mostly empty. We still made our own fun.

(I do think the ice skating rink was busy. It's new this year. They installed it at the baseball stadium and named it the Frozen Sandlot. It was open and isn't far from downtown, so I think it probably had a good crowd. I do NOT need to add a broken self to my list of appointments right now, so we didn't attempt it.)

Our first stop at the night was at MoJoe, which is a coffee shop on the square. Now, that place was SO busy. They had live music going on, a full crowd painting pottery in the back, and the boutique upstairs was open. We decided just to get our coffee to go, but we did listen to the music while we waited for it!

We wandered through the streets and discovered an art alley. WHO KNEW??? We sure didn't! It was dark when we arrived, but the alley was well-lit, so we were able to see the exhibits well. I'm SO not an artist, nor am I smart in any way about any kind of art. I don't get the symbolism. But I appreciate things that catch my eye, so here are a couple of photos.

(That last one had the word courage in it, so I figured I should take a picture.)

The alley full of art was right outside a business called Artworks Gallery. I'm sure you can guess we hadn't been there before either, but I had read they were serving a s'more buffet, so you surely can believe I marched in to participate in that! (Ryan was cornered by an employee who told him all about art, so he wasn't able to document my stellar marshmallow roasting skills, but he did get the final product.)

And since we were getting our fill of art for the night, we walked over to the area that had a new exhibit called Kokomo Glow. It really was pretty cool.

That was the end of our First Friday Hygge Happiness date. It was a short but good evening. It would have been a bit more exciting if a few more businesses had participated or a few more people had shown up, but we learned new things about our town, so we counted it a success! And with all the lights and s'mores and coffee, it really was hygge for us.

Sugar Scrubs!

It's not been terribly wintry here in the past couple of weeks (AND I AM NOT COMPLAINING!!!) but I'm still trying to stay ahead of "winter skin." Anyone else ever have that? Maybe it's dry air, maybe it's wind, maybe it's the occasionally itchy clothing of winter, or maybe it's a little of all of that together! Whatever the cause, my skin always seems a bit dry and angry in the winter.

I used to notice it more on my legs than anywhere else. I would get little dry patches and if I accidentally scratched one, it would take forever to stop itching. It was so annoying! 

A few days ago, I happened to notice that my legs didn't have any little dry patches on them. Once I realized that, I paused to think about it and realized they haven't had any little dry patches for a really long time. (I'm nothing if not wildly observant. Eyeroll.) 

Once I started thinking hard about it, I concluded that the change came when I started using a sugar scrub as shaving cream. (We won't talk about how long ago that was, because then you'll know how REALLY unobservant I've been.) 

I had never heard - or thought - of using a sugar scrub to shave until after I started using Lemongrass Spa products. They sell sugar scrubs and recommended using them for shaving (among other things). I tried it mostly because I knew there were probably a bunch of toxins in my regular shaving cream. I wanted to try to get away from that. I did notice pretty quickly that it made my skin soft - not just on my legs, but also on my hands from when I applied it. Since my hands also take a winter beating, that combo was enough to keep me using it for shaving. 

(I did try a Lemongrass Spa salt scrub to shave, but I learned quickly that if you're a sloppy shaver, as I tend to be, you do NOT want a salt scrub in that wound! Just FYI.)

I loved everything about the sugar scrub shaving life except...the price. We're a one income household, for the most part, so I try to be frugal, and the sugar scrub was a bit beyond my budget, especially as frequently as I needed it.

I adored the scrubs I bought from Lemongrass Spa, and if you're using their products and have the scrubs in your budget, by all means! Keep getting them. They are great quality. But the truth of it for me is that their products work better for my skin than ANYTHING I have ever used, and I am not wealthy enough to buy everything I'd like to have every month. So I'm allotting my budget toward the products I can't make for myself, and my skin loves me for it.

But a sugar scrub? I can make that. 

Making it is cheaper than buying it, which is one big bonus. Another bonus is I tend to not realize I'm running out until I have like two shaves left...and that's not enough time to have a new supply shipped. Making it in my kitchen speeds up the order-to-delivery turnaround. 

Here's how I do it.

Sugar Scrub

* 1 cup white sugar

* 1/4 cup (plus extra as needed) vegetable oil

* 5 drops essential oil of choice

Combine sugar and vegetable oil in a bowl. If scrub is crumbly, slowly add a little more oil until the scrub nearly resembles a very thick syrup. Add essential oil(s) of choice and combine. Store in airtight container.

Random Tips

* You could any kind of carrier oil if you don't want to use vegetable oil. You could use almond or olive (though I've read olive can carry a strong scent that some people don't like) or grapeseed oil if you want. Since cost-effectiveness is part of my intent, vegetable oil works well for me. 

* Start with the 1-cup-to-a-quarter-cup ratio and add oil as needed. The first time I made a scrub, I stuck to that precisely, but the scrub was super crumbly. That would have been fine if I'd just been using it as a hand scrub at the sink or a foot scrub in a foot bath, but it didn't hold together well for the shaving scrub. I found that adding more oil until the scrub amost lresembled a very very thick syrup was the best fit for me. If you add too much oil, just add a little more sugar! 

* The sugar and oil combo in and of itself would work, but adding the essential oils gives it a great scent and depending on the oil you choose, it may also be extra great for your skin!

Here are some oil ideas if you need some:

* Lavender

* Lemon

* Peppermint

* Cinnamon

If you need a good winter project for your winter skin, give this one a try! It assembles quickly and works well. Hope you like it! 

The Shafferland Shuffle

This has certainly been the kind of week we did not expect. Ryan's mom is still hospitalized after a setback early in the week. She's counting on prayers, and our hearts wouldn't turn them away either.


* Last Sunday was ugly Christmas sweater day at our church. Ryan and I are far too hot-blooded to wear sweaters, but we did show up in Christmas shirts! We had a blissssssssssssssssssful afternoon at home: our first Sunday at home with no plans in many many weeks. We did all our favorite nothingness things. Naps and football and Pinteresting. (I'm sure you can tell which was his, hers, and ours.) But the best part was that evening we wrapped up our read-through-the-Bible-in-a-year project we worked on so hard throughout 2018. What a celebration!

* Even though Monday was the last day of the year, we began ramping up the clean eating again. Hello, cauliflower rice and turkey meatballs!! How have you been? As you already saw earlier this week, we spent that evening with our Sunday School class, ringing in the new year with them. We played games, ate great food, and enjoyed very pleasant conversation. (And of course: the midnight kiss.)

* Ryan was off work Tuesday and we spent the entire day together. It was a practically perfect day, as Mary Poppins might say, and we had no idea how much we needed that to carry us through the rest of the week! A little shopping, a little Bible study, a little 5K, a little latte-making....it was the best possible way to bring in 2019.

* And then Wednesday came. Ryan went back to work and our niece job-shadowed him. We planned to celebrate our 73rd monthiversary in a low-key, blissfully ordinary sort of way, when we got the phone call that Ryan's mom had been taken back to the hospital after suffering a setback. When Ryan got off work, we made our way back to Indianapolis to be with her and the family. It was a hard, hard night. (P.S. I'm vehemently opposed to vague social media posts, and that is not my intent here. I'm merely trying to respect the privacy wishes of the immediate family.)

* We tried to go through our normal routine on Thursday. Ryan went to work and I went to the podiatrist. Oh yes. We're back to that. We had plans for the weekend, so we decided we would go back to Indianapolis that night to see his mom again. We arrived right when the floor closed for shift change. (Why don't they tell us about these things!?) So we went to the chapel for about an hour to sit quietly and pray. Then we went back to see Nita, and Ryan's brother and his wife were there too. Though I wanted to be respectful and chose not to take pictures, I did make a lot of mental memories that night with the five of us there together.

* I spent Friday trying to catch up on items from my to-do list that had to be skipped over because of all the unexpected hospital visits. I made homemade cleaners and oil rollers, caught up on some emails, did some menu planning, and a handful of other chores. And that evening, Ryan and I went on our first official date of 2019. We scoped out First Friday in downtown Kokomo. (I'll tell you more about that next week.)

* Ryan had to work yesterday, so we didn't travel to the hospital. We were trying to give other family members a chance to spend time with his mom.  He worked most of the day and then we hunkered down to watch the Colts in the playoffs! We decided to make a fun meal while we were at it: Ryan grilled wings and I made a healthy version of onion petals in the air fryer. The meal was ridiculously delicious, and the Colts won, so it was a good night. 

Thanks for reading through our week and if you happen to think of us today and in the days to come, we would dearly welcome your prayers.

The Saturday Six

One.

Two years ago, for my daily devotions, I did the Scripture writing plan featured on Shannon's blog, Sweet Blessings. I ended up interviewing her on The Conversation Café and have continued to follow her on social media. And I'm sure glad I did, because I. Love. This. A few days ago, Shannon wrote about an Instagram post she saw that encouraged people to "count the fruit." To keep track of things they see in their lives that show how God worked and helped them bear fruit. Isn't that a great idea? Shannon thought so to, and she made some free printables to help you keep track of it. One is for 2018, if you'd like to reflect on the year we just finished and remember how God showed Himself faithful to you. The other is for 2019, to help you keep track (in real time) of those moments in this year we are in now. I think this is beautiful!

Two.

This week I read this post by Liz Curtis Higgs. I adored the way she explored Isaiah 9:6 , and her fresh take on why His Name is called Wonderful. I used this whole post in a praise section of my devotions this week. Take a read!

Three.

Putting the house back together after Christmas is one of my favorite things, so this has been a fun week for me. It also always inspires me to want to try a few new home-freshening projects. Though I don't have anything specific on my radar right now, I SO LOVED looking at these before and after pictures from home makeovers on a budget. Inspiration station!

Four.

You know how sometimes you can't decide if you want to open a bed and breakfast or run a gym? (Oh...no? Just us?) Well, in a rare twist that I've never before seen, this home gives you the chance to do both. Have you ever seen a FULL GYM on a house?

Five.

If you're feeling a bit like your life is terribly ordinary, this piece might help you realize in fresh ways that ordinary can be beautiful. God is the God of the ordinary, and He has an important calling for you IN your ordinary. Kind of relieving, isn't it?

Six.

I'm so excited to be back to reading, but some unexpected trips to the hospital this week to see Ryan's mom meant I don't have this week's book quite done yet. Apparently I'm going to need the weekend itself to finish reading. So until I can officially report in, I'm going with food for my sixth item this week. Now that Ryan and I have this fancy pants latte maker, we're looking for ways to step up our coffee game. He's not the lover of whipped cream that I am, but I found this recipe for chocolate whipped cream. Sign. Me. Up. Even if you don't have a fancy pants latte maker, you could use this with hot cocoa or on cake or straight from the bowl with a spoon...whatever!

Preparing My Heart for Communion

A few months ago, Ryan and I were asked to help serve communion at church. We didn't drop anything, so they asked us again the next month, and now we're serving again on Sunday. We completely enjoy serving in this way, but I had a little hiccup in my heart over just that...my heart. I didn't feel like I was adequately preparing on the inside for what was happening on the outside.

I grew up in a Quaker church. (I used to say I grew up in a Friends church, but people thought I meant "a friend's church" like I didn't have my own church. Quakers and Friends are synonymous term.) If you're not familiar with that church, one of the unique things about it is that they don't practice the physical elements of communion. They have a time in each service called "communion after the manner of Friends" where the congregation sits quietly, communing with the Lord.

Perhaps that background from the first nineteen years of my life is what has pushed me to be more aware of the state of my heart as I enter a time of breaking actual bread and drinking from an actual cup.

Our church now is pretty big, so communion is a bit of an art form. I'm still learning when to step forward and take the elements. I'm still learning the rhythm of serving my section efficiently. I'm still learning to be aware of other rows that might need help once mine are served. All those things are part of serving. But they also distract (in the moment) from communing in my spirit.

So the Lord gave me an idea for a little guide that I can use on Sunday morning, before I even go to church. I thought I would share it with you, in case you ever find yourself in a place where you need to settle your heart before you break bread and drink from the cup.

In true Bekah fashion, this is an acrostic based on the word COMMUNE. (You're welcome.)

C = Confess. When Paul wrote to the Corinthian church, he had some directives for them on how they should administer the Lord's Supper. One of the things he said was, "Everyone ought to examine themselves before they eat of the bread and drink from the cup." (1 Corinthians 11:28) My first stop in my quiet time will be to examine my heart to see if there's anything I haven't confessed that I need to address. (Side note: I'm trying to be more diligent about doing this anyway. I tend to gloss over things I know I really should address!)

O = Open. Psalm 119:18 says, "Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law." I want to be sure that as I enter this time of communing with God, my eyes are opened to whatever He wants to show me. I don't want to only see what I choose to see, but I want to be open anything He may want to put in my path. It might be a blessing, it might be a piece of understanding, it might even be (gulp) discipline. But I want to see.

M = Meditate. I know that whole meditate word can be a tricky one, because some people associate it with practices that aren't very holy in nature. But Psalm 119:97 says, "Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long." When I meditate on something, I focus my thoughts on it and camp out there for as long as I can. And in a moment like this one, I certainly want to be meditating on the Lord and His word. (And on the things I just asked Him to open my eyes to see from that Word.) Plus, this part just reminds me of that Quaker upbringing and sitting quietly before the Lord.

M = Memory. If you read Luke 22:7-38, you can read about the Last Supper Jesus had with His disciples. During that time, he said to them, "do this in remembrance of me." (In fact, many churches have tables at the front with that phrase engraved on them.) So part of what I want to do in preparing my heart is call to my memory the whole reason we participate in this at all. We are participating because Jesus asked us to do it in remembrance of Him. 

U = Understand.  I'm not a scholar. Not by a long shot. There are many things I don't understand, and some of those things are okay with me. I think part of having faith in God is being content with not understanding everything about everything, but trusting that He is sovereign. But I do want to understand everything I can. In the book of Mark you can read about a time when Jesus predicted His death and resurrection, but it says the disciples "did not understand what he meant and were afraid to ask him about it." (9:32) While I'm preparing my heart, I want to take time to ask for the ability to understand anything I should and don't. I don't want to be afraid to ask.

N = Near. One of the verses my mom taught me when I was a little girl was "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. (James 4:8) I think one of the important things to remember about practicing communion is that Jesus' death and resurrection gave us the opportunity to draw near to God. I don't want to forget that. And I definitely want to experience it. So I want to begin to wrap up my heart-preparation by asking God to draw me near.

E = Enter. Psalm 100:4 says, "Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name." Though much about the practice of communion is weighty and serious, I also believe God wants us to approach Him with thanksgiving and praise, so I want to end my preparation on that note. 

I'm looking forward to spending communion Sundays with this guide, so I can prepare my heart to worship and serve. In those final moments before I actually serve, I may be trying to work out all the logistics of serving smoothly, but when I arrive, I want to show up with a heart prepared to serve and receive.

Seventy-Three Months...the Versaries Continue

Yesterday marked 73 months of marriage for us. Yes, we still celebrate monthiversaries. No, we don't plan to stop anytime soon.

It was a normal kind of day, with housework for me and work-work for Ryan. His niece job-shadowed him, so we shared lunch with her, and that felt like a perfect fit for a monthiversary. Though the end of our 2018 was filled with a lot of long-term hospitality, we've missed the opportunity to practice regular hospitality - inviting people in to share meals and conversation.

Having Kelsey here for lunch was a good practice of something we love to do together. A good reminder of why we are thankful for this little house and all it allows us to offer.

We had a blissfully boring evening planned. The kind of evening that involved working out, eating leftovers, kicking back on the couch to watch some of our ever-piling shows on our DVR.

Sometimes a phone call can change all that.

In our case, the phone call told us Ryan's mom had some new complications in her recovery. Our hearts hurt for her. This is physically and emotionally exhausting for the whole family, but for her most of all.

So, with snow spitting outside the windows, I began speeding up my work at home so we could leave as soon as Ryan's work day ended. We'd take our monthiversary picture on the fly and make our way to the hospital to be whatever kind of support we could be.

Earlier in the day, before any of the phones rang, I had been praying over our marriage, and I thought of the words in Philippians 1:6. "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

This 73rd month of marriage was the first in our seventh year. Seven is known in the Bible to be a number of perfection and completion. And while we are by no means wrapping up or completing our marriage, we have prayed that this year will be a year of joy and perfection. Not that we will be perfect, nor that our marriage will be perfect. We know both those things are impossible. But we also know that every opportunity that comes our way is a chance for the Lord to do His perfecting work in us and in the marriage He's allowing us to live. And we want that.

Right now, our story seems to be one of trying to be the best support to Ryan's mom that we can. It seems to be a time of perfecting our love through leaning hard on each other and on the Lord. It's a time of showing up to support and understanding the other's limitations and giving grace. It's a time of stopping for ice cream late at night because ice cream is a good companion.

So the 73rd monthiversary may not have looked like we would have planned, but it did look like time spent together, and it did look like love, and it did look like leaning on Jesus. And that's what we promised in our vows.

Ryan, I love you, and I love the way you stand by your mom and your whole family. I stand by you, and I hold to the promise that He who began a good work in ALL of us will carry it on to completion. He won't fail.

Happy New Year...Shafferland Style!

Happppppppppy New Year!!!! Welcome to 2019...and I would just like the record to show I haven't yet messed up my date-writing. I'm sure today will be the day. (How long does it take you to remember to write the new year?)

We had a really wonderful New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, so I thought I'd tell you about it! We rang in the new year with our Sunday School class. I signed up to take cookies and then completely stressed out about what to take. I made a batch of healthy chocolate chip cookies (which needs some fine tuning) for those who were already on the diet-watching bandwagon. Then I found a recipe for Chinese Almond Cookies (yes, I'm aware it was not the Chinese New Year) and made those too! I think Ryan wanted to eat the whole plate of almond cookies by himself. He declared them to be a perfect coffee companion.

Everyone at the party pitched in, and the food was delicious. We played some games after we ate, and in true Shaffer fashion, we didn't actually win a GAME, but I documented it when our team won a ROUND, because that's as close to winning as I ever get.

Ryan played pool, too. Apparently he needs a little more practice. I didn't even try. It wouldn't have gone well.

I wore my sparkly shoes, because that seemed appropriate for the occasion.

We had our picture taken with one of the full size trees in the house. This house is beautiful at all times, but they do Christmas right, and the trees are stunning - and in every single room.

We all gathered around the TV to count down to 2019, and NBC totally failed me. The year never flashed across the screen all big. This is the first time in probably a decade or more that I haven't gotten a picture of the new year sign on the TV.

Oh, NBC. Why??

Fortunately, on New Year's Day, Ryan and I ran some errands, and downtown Kokomo made up for television's failure.

(So I made my own version.)

Despite the lack of actual photo, we toasted with sparkling grape juice and had our midnight kiss. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

On our way home, we stopped and saw Miss Pheebs. Her people were getting home pretty late, so they wanted us to just make sure she was okay. She was great until she found out we weren't staying. Whoopsie!!

And speaking of whoopsie, we accidentally slept until 9:30 on New Year's Day. I could have slept until noon, but I was surprised we slept as late as we did. Ryan took the day off work so we could spend time together, and he wanted to start his free day with biscuits and gravy for breakfast.

It was a lot like my smoothie...in no way.

And because she hasn't made a blog appearance in a while, I thought I should tell you that Braeya Jo Jo (clearly) thoroughly enjoyed the family vacation day.

I dug into my new Bible study on the book of Matthew, and Ryan took an ice bath. What? Yes, its true. He has a bum ankle right now and thought he'd kick off the new year with an ice bath. (I'm giving myself a pedicure later today. It will NOT feature ice.)

Later in the day, we ran some errands and also ran...a 5K! We opted to use the treadmills, so we could stay warm. I was pretty proud of us. Workouts have been sketchy lately and as previously mentioned, Ryan's not operating at 100%, so to pull off a successful first day 5K was great!

After dinner, we made white chocolate raspberry lattes and settled in with our annual New Year's Day traditions. We went through our box of memories we've collected throughout the year, filled out a new questionnaire for next year, and began a new list of prayer requests on our Surrender Cross. We spent some time praying over those things and over 2019!

So it's been a good start to a new year. I'm grateful for extra time with Ryan, for celebration, and for the return to something I've heard of...called normalcy?

The Courage to Wait

What a fun way to kick off a new year! Podcast Tuesday and New Year's Day collide! We have the first episode of Spill the Beans for 2019, and we hope you can hang out with us for a half hour or so today. Enjoy!!

 

Listen here!

I don't normally participate in the whole word-of-the-year trend. But I do get sucked into a good quiz without a second thought, so when I happened upon Dayspring's word-of-the-year quiz last week, I had to take it.

My word turned out to be courage.

I was both amused and terrified by this news. Amused, because courageous is probably among the very last of the words I'd ever use to describe myself at any given point in my life. Terrified, because...what if it's true? What if I have to be uncomfortably courageous in this year to come?

Rather than dismissing my quiz results, I decided to pause and consider this courage thing. I didn't laugh it away as ridiculous, nor did I fear it (though I desperately wanted to) as an omen of things to come.

Instead, I wondered what might happen if I allow God to work in my heart through the algorithm of online quiz questions? What if I pause to consider what courage could look like in my 2019?

I decided to start by finding a theme verse for myself. Of course the first one that came to mind is one of Ryan's favorites: Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9) I wasn't opposed to borrowing his verse, but I wanted to see if there were others that might hit me in a slightly different way.

I found this one through a coloring page, of all things. (If God can work through a quiz, He can surely work through a coloring page, can't He?)

Psalm 27:14 

Wait for the Lord; 

be strong, and let your heart take courage; 

wait for the Lord. 

(ESV)

That verse looked like a little word sandwich to me. The meat of being strong and taking courage is sandwiched between two reminders to wait.

Waiting takes courage.

Did you ever think about it that way?

When I first thought about courage, I thought about all the big things God might ask of me in the year to come. What might He ask of me that is uncomfortable because it's too loud in some way?

But it might be that He simply asks me to wait. Or He might indeed ask something that feels loud to me, but before it can be loud, it must be shrouded in waiting.

Is waiting as hard for you as it is for me? Do you sit on the edge of your seat, tapping your toes asking God if He is ready to move yet?

Now?

How about now?

Yes, waiting takes courage. Perhaps it takes more courage to wait than it does to stand up and do some scary, loud thing.

2019 looms all mysterious before me. God has, I'm sure, many lessons for me tucked into the corners of its twelve months. But as I take my first steps into the mystery, I'm doing so with the fresh understanding that it takes courage to wait. Perhaps waiting requires more courage than anything else at all.

(Did you take the quiz? What was your word? Or what is your word for 2019 - if you've chosen one?)