Sunday Sentiments

 

It's been just over three weeks since our yard went in, and this week the gentleman who came to fertilize advised us to begin again. 

We knew it was the word that would be coming, but it was still hard news to hear.

We've worked hard to keep up with the watering. We've prayed over that silly yard. We've prayed for rain, and we've prayed for provision in supplementing when rain didn't fall. 

Some grass poked up through the dirt, but the oppressive heat and lack of rain just pushed open wide cracks in the hard dirt. We watched as birds came along and snacked on the baby yard. 

And with no other recourse, we went to the store to buy up the supplies to start over at our own expense.

Yesterday was our monthiversary, and we spent the day reseeding and putting down straw, second-guessing every decision we've made over the last three weeks, and rushing to beat dusk with our straw-scattering. It was super romantic.

I say these things not to complain (truly!) but just to share what I'm learning from our reality. 

As I sat crying from exhaustion late last night, I had to face the truth that the bottom line was I was just disappointed in a first-world problem.

I was disappointed that a series of poor decisions made by the builder pretty much set us up to fail in growing a yard. 

I was disappointed that we were backed into a corner where we had to pour personal resources into something that was supposed to be a provision with the house when we bought it. 

I was disappointed that our monthiversary - one that fell on a weekend when we could actually spend time together - turned into a day of hard work and dividing to conquer.

I was disappointed that we had to keep canceling and modifying our plans to get this project done.

I was disappointed that I was a terrible hostess to our visitor who ended up IN THE YARD WITH US helping us seed.

And in the grand scheme of life, it doesn't matter. It's disappointing today. It's an inconvenience today. It's not what I planned for today. But in fifty years, it will be a story we look back on and shake our heads. It will be something we look back on and see how God taught us lessons. (I'm confident He will. I haven't learned them yet.) 

My heart and mind are weary, so I fear I may not have a neat and tidy bow to put on this post. But I will say that I'm grateful for a hardworking and smart husband who knows how to do things like seed yards. This was a first for me! 

And I'm grateful for a friend and a neighbor who both popped in to help throughout the day or we'd have been out there scrambling long after darkness fell.

Thanks, friends, for reading along with our yard adventures. I'm sure it's not that exciting, but it's our reality right now. I hope we learn something worth sharing so I can pass it your way!