The Stuff of Dreams

We had a quiet evening last night...a perfect sort of date.

It was a throwback, in some ways, to the single years. The evenings were quiet then, too, but in a deafening sort of way. The kind of way where I could hear my heartbeat in my ears as I drank sparkling grape juice and munched on heart-shaped pizza by myself. I'd curl up with my journal and dream about love, yes, but more than just love. Life. Life that had elements of adventure, fun, and togetherness. The kind of life I determined could be real, even though everyone around me seemed to caution me not to get my hopes up too much.

But last night we sat at our breakfast bar, our dining table having been decommissioned due to its temporary use as a wood shop. 

I brought over the vase of twelve red roses Ryan bought for me. I know roses aren't for everyone, but I dearly adore them. We don't get them too often, but he never fails to make them appear on Valentine's Day, and I never fail to reposition them around the house so they're always in view.

We pulled out the fancy goblets and the bottle of sparkling grape juice we always/only get for special occasions. 

Ryan braved the cold to grill steaks, and he cooked tiny golden potatoes in the air fryer (a keeper of a cooking method, let me tell you). I baked asparagus with a hint of olive oil, seasoned salt, and almond slivers and tried out a salted caramel fondue as the inaugural recipe in our fondue pot. 

We plated it all enjoyed every bite. (Well, Ryan did. I saved some of my bites for the next meal.)

Food aside, though, we had great conversation while we ate. 

One of Ryan' questions to me was this: Is marriage what you hoped?

I thought for a minute - back to those Valentine nights alone at the coffee table with my heart shaped pizza. I thought of what I hoped for, but I also remembered the admonitions from others that it wasn't reality. 

I looked him in the eye and said, "Marriage is what I hoped, but but it's more than I dared to hope it could actually be, if that makes any sense."

We talked about the things we've loved most. The grand adventures. The daily moments. The fun. The laughter. Working through the hard. 

We talked about how we hope those looking in from the outside see our joy and gratitude for this life. How we hope to be an example just by being. 

It was the perfect evening. Warm and cozy inside, delicious food, good dream-filled questions. I'm grateful.