A Husband's Grace

Friday I told you about the grace of my high school chemistry teacher. Today I have another grace story for you, and it features my very favorite person: Ryan.

I tell this story partly because I love telling people the wonderful things he does, but I tell it also because a very small gesture made a very great impact, and I think we need to hear of those moments we can take every opportunity to make them happen for others!

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Money.

Boy, that's a subject in just about every marriage, isn't it? It's actually never been a big deal for us, and when I say that, I don't mean that we have an unending supply and never have to worry about it. We've certainly had our share of financial blessings and hardships, but it's not a subject we fight about. We're both interested in saving as much as we can, and neither of us leans toward being the last of the big-time-spenders. We know what we have, we know what we need, we give, we save, we spend, and we don't have secrets from each other about what we're doing with money. (Other than gifts FOR each other, of course.)

We don't have his-and-hers money. We have our money, and that's what works for us. Maybe it works differently in your house, and if that's what works for you, that's fine, too!

In our current life situations, Ryan works outside our home and brings in 99% (+) of our income. My income ebbs and flows with writing assignments and speaking engagements. This working arrangement of ours is what we feel called to in this season, and Ryan never makes me feel inferior in the times when I'm not bringing in much income.

(That's all background you're going to need to know in a moment.)

Because I'm not out and about all that much, I rarely need cash, but Ryan tries to make sure I always have at least a twenty on hand just in case I need or want it. (Then I proceed to play a self-induced game of seeing how long I can make that twenty last!)

A couple of weeks ago, he'd given me a new twenty, as my previous one had given up its final ghost at a Goodwill sale. I began my new game of seeing how long I could make it last, and I was happy as a little lark. (Out of curiosity - how happy are larks, anyway?)

We had a busy week and Ryan asked if I would have time to mow the yard for him, because he just didn't have enough daylight hours to get it done that week. Of course! No problem. I was happily buzzing through the yard when I heard a MASSIVE grinding sound and bits of green plastic went flying everywhere.

Uh oh.

I forgot to go around and pick up the drain pop-ups before I mowed. The grass was tall enough around that one that it had blended right in, and I hadn't even seen it.

I properly destroyed that little piece of plastic. It never felt a thing. I picked up all the shards, threw them away, removed the REST of the pop-ups before continuing and mowed the whole yard. When Ryan came home for lunch, I confessed my mishap, and while he wasn't angry by any means, he did grimace a little. I thought that was kind of strange, so I said, "Well how much do they cost?"

He said, "Oh about twenty dollars."

TWENTY DOLLARS!?!?!!?!? FOR A LITTLE GREEN PIECE OF PLASTIC????

I should add that in addition to the one I had just destroyed, our cement workers had destroyed two more on the other side of the yard. You see how this bill is rapidly adding up here, don't you? I figured they cost maybe five to seven dollars each, so with the other two, we were looking at no more than twenty dollars TOPS. Not twenty dollars EACH.

Gulp.

After he went back to work, I went to my wallet and pulled out my beloved twenty and laid it on Ryan's nightstand.

When he came home and saw it, he said, "What is this?"

I told him I wanted to pay for what I destroyed. He said, "It's all our money anyway. You don't have to give me this. Just keep it."

I said, "I will be certain to be more careful in the future if I donate my fun money to the pop up drain fund." (I am a great self-mom.)

He never said anything else, and we went on about our day.

The next day I had to look for something in my wallet, and when I opened it, I found my twenty with a pink sticky note that said, "I love you."

I may never spend that twenty. I may frame it and hang it in my office to remind me of my husband's great grace.

It's not about twenty dollars. It's not about his money/her money/our money. It's that he saw my guilt and set me free.

I love how he teaches me grace.

I love him, too!