It’s been a while since I sat down with a piece of fiction. It seems like every time I have a moment to read, I’m reading something that I will use in writing or teaching. But when I do sit to read a good story, I have a really bad habit of skimming the entire book so that I know what happens and where I’m going with the story line, and then I go back and read for content…for detail. I just seem to not be able to enjoy the rich word-paintings of the book until I know exactly what happens in the plot.
Am I the only person who does that with life, too? I was speaking to my Ladies Bible Study group last Monday evening, and I told them God had just talked to me (an hour earlier) about enjoying the journey of my life. I had come home from work somewhat upset…okay, bawling my eyes out…about some news our office received right before the end of the day. I collapsed on the stairs to cry, because that is my serious crying spot. I’ll cry all over the house, but when it’s a big deal, I sit on the stairs. I had my head against a step, and Braeya crept up next to me and sniffed my face. She must have remembered that it’s a weird thing when water comes out of my face, because she scampered on up the stairs to play with Kaegan and left me to sort out my feelings on the puke green carpet.
God and I had a serious conversation there on the stairs. I had a lot of questions and He actually offered a few answers. (A few more than I was expecting, really!) While I had that going for me, I decided to ask more and more. The fiction reading syndrome, I guess. I just wanted to know where this whole path would lead me. God knew my little manipulation game, though, and He stopped me.
It just so happened that the chapter I was teaching in Bible Study that night had to do with joy. God took full advantage of that situation and reminded me that while it was okay to be upset…while it was okay to be unsure…underneath all of it, I needed to carry a spirit of joy. Joy isn’t happiness. It was okay with Him that I wasn’t happy right then. But happy or not, I had every reason to be joyful, and I needed to dig out that joy and show it.
I promised to do that and tried to get back to my question-asking, but God had more. He pointed out that life is a journey. All the little things that happen along the way are details put there by the Author to make the path more beautiful from start to finish. And while I might be able to pick up a piece of fiction and skim it for the main idea before going back and gathering the details, life doesn’t work that way.
My options are to skim through life and life a skimmed life or to pay attention to the details as I come across them and enjoy them for what they mean. That’s the idea of the joy in the journey. Michael Card wrote a song with that title, in fact.
Am I the only person who does that with life, too? I was speaking to my Ladies Bible Study group last Monday evening, and I told them God had just talked to me (an hour earlier) about enjoying the journey of my life. I had come home from work somewhat upset…okay, bawling my eyes out…about some news our office received right before the end of the day. I collapsed on the stairs to cry, because that is my serious crying spot. I’ll cry all over the house, but when it’s a big deal, I sit on the stairs. I had my head against a step, and Braeya crept up next to me and sniffed my face. She must have remembered that it’s a weird thing when water comes out of my face, because she scampered on up the stairs to play with Kaegan and left me to sort out my feelings on the puke green carpet.
God and I had a serious conversation there on the stairs. I had a lot of questions and He actually offered a few answers. (A few more than I was expecting, really!) While I had that going for me, I decided to ask more and more. The fiction reading syndrome, I guess. I just wanted to know where this whole path would lead me. God knew my little manipulation game, though, and He stopped me.
It just so happened that the chapter I was teaching in Bible Study that night had to do with joy. God took full advantage of that situation and reminded me that while it was okay to be upset…while it was okay to be unsure…underneath all of it, I needed to carry a spirit of joy. Joy isn’t happiness. It was okay with Him that I wasn’t happy right then. But happy or not, I had every reason to be joyful, and I needed to dig out that joy and show it.
I promised to do that and tried to get back to my question-asking, but God had more. He pointed out that life is a journey. All the little things that happen along the way are details put there by the Author to make the path more beautiful from start to finish. And while I might be able to pick up a piece of fiction and skim it for the main idea before going back and gathering the details, life doesn’t work that way.
My options are to skim through life and life a skimmed life or to pay attention to the details as I come across them and enjoy them for what they mean. That’s the idea of the joy in the journey. Michael Card wrote a song with that title, in fact.
So I was challenged to go through the rest of the week and find joy in it. The week had its rough moments when I felt anything but joyful. But it really was a wonderful time. Yesterday, especially, was very sweet. I’m on cat-sitting duty for a friend, and since yesterday was extra-beautiful, I decided to walk over to her house instead of drive. It’s probably close to a mile away, and I enjoyed a good stroll in the sunlight. I could hear birds singing, and there was a perfect warm breeze blowing. After I fed the cats, I continued my walk for another mile or two, just taking in the blue sky and greening grass.
It was the perfect time to talk with God, and this time I wasn’t trying to weasel information out of Him. I was just enjoying the beauty of the day. He told me as I walked that I was doing well at experiencing the joy of the journey right then. That moments such as that one were the joy-filled moments He talked about. And while we chatted, He filled in a few more bits of the story for me.
It’s time to kick the habit of living from one milestone to the next…sitting around impatiently waiting for a particular dream to come true…angrily pounding on the door of Heaven for answers. Those moments will come when they’re supposed to come, so I might as well savor the “filler” moments. The details. The tiny moments God intended to bring joy.
2 comments:
Thanks! I needed that to help me get throught the last few weeks of my pregnancy and to get past the worry about the whole house situation. I have been everything but joyful the past few months as I have focused on why God hasn't answered certain prayers. Instead of complaining, I need to be thankful and joyful that I live in a beautiful part of the country and am going to have a beautiful new baby boy soon.
I love company in my boat...though I wish for your sake the stresses were fewer and you didn't have to hang out in this boat! But you are right...the beautiful baby - and the very cute boy you already have...are great blessings. Can't wait to "meet" your new little one!
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