Disrupting Life

 

I ran across a beautiful quote yesterday. One of my photo-manager-friends shared it, and I took a screenshot so I could keep track of it. Penned by Donna Ashworth, here is the quote:

            I am the taker of the photos. I am the receiver of the groans, the eye-rolls, and hurry ups’. I am the one who disrupts the moments to capture them. And sometimes it’s hard to be that person. But I am also the holder of the memories…I am the one who keeps the precious proof. I am the bearer of the stories, the maker of the photo books that bring tears, laughter and love rushing into the room, each time they are opened. The eye-rolls will be replaced one day with absolute all-consuming gratitude, for the image of a smiling face so missed and a memory returned home to stay. Keep disrupting life to capture it, my friends, when it’s all that is left; someone somewhere will be so very glad you did.

            It is my story too.

            I apologize for zero of the photos I have taken in the name of preserving memory. I have been put in my place over a few of them, and there have been settings where I choose not to take pictures because I choose not to subject myself to the hurtful words, but I have no regrets over anything I’ve captured.

            Recently I went through my phone to delete older photos to make room for newer ones. All the photos are backed up in several places, and I sometimes have to make choices about what I keep at the ready on the camera roll. There are so many that make me smile.

            The ziplining photo that accompanies me in many speaking engagements. A lot of people have laughed at my “dying duck” form, and I welcome it.

            The video of my mom walking in the front door of our Kokomo house on her 80^th birthday, when she thought she was bringing a veggie tray to our housewarming party, but she was providing food to her own “Cookies and Canvas” party.

            The picture-of-a-picture of my South Marion Church family back in the late 80s. It was some sort of a milestone day at the church, and we all piled into the choir loft and across the platform, spilling down over the altar and nearly to the front pew. I can name almost everyone and tell you the stories of how their faith impacted my life.

            A whole gaggle of pictures from when Ryan and I traveled to Kansas to meet our great-niece for the first time. She was a few months old and not quite sure about these Indiana folk at first.

            The picture of me sitting on the sidewalk in front of our Kokomo house, crying over jury summons. (Okay, fake crying on the outside. But the inside tears were real.)

            A picture with sweet Odie when we drove to Ohio to surprise her for her housewarming party.

            A picture of me glaring at the camera while trying to swab for a nicotine test for Ryan’s health insurance when we lived in Kokomo. My mouth was so dry from fasting for bloodwork that I could NOT get the swab to take appropriately, and it was miserable.

            A picture of me surrounded by my friend’s FIVE daughters. I watched them every single week for a while when Ryan did physical therapy appointments for her. She drove over an hour to see him and brought all those girls along. One night we went for a walk and did a selfie on the sidewalk. They were such fun.

            A picture of Ryan and me with Deuce. Some of you might remember him! He was a Blue Heeler that we sat for a few times. Such a good dog.

            A picture of Ryan’s mom asleep with her head down on our kitchen table. I know from the date on the picture that her tumor was taking over, but we didn’t yet know she had it.

            And then, less than ten days later, the picture of Ryan and me with his mom. Ryan’s fist is in the foreground of the photo, as he points to where his mom should look for the picture. She had already lost the ability to know where to look.

            A picture of me rocking baby Camden to sleep during Ryan’s mom’s surgery.

            A picture of me hiding in our Kokomo closet with a box of donuts. I hid some of the good food in our closet, because when Ryan’s mom lived with us, she was ravenous from steroids and ate everything she could find. One swipe later? A picture of Ryan hiding in the closet eating donuts with me, because he knew how hard it all was for me to handle.

            A picture of Ryan with his mom at our house on what would be her last Christmas on earth.

            On and on it goes. The pictures aren’t all great quality. We don’t always look the best. But every single one of those pictures tells a story. For every sentence I just gave you, there are pages of story I could add.

            And so I won’t apologize for disrupting life. I won’t be sorry for taking pictures of meals and sunsets and sleeping puppies and crying on sidewalks. I will capture and preserve.

            It’s who I am.

Bekah's Bookshelf: My 2024 Reads So Far

            One of my goals for this month was to read for 30 minutes a day. I’m shocked at how much more I accomplished in reading this month with a mere 30 minutes a day! AKA - this post is longer than my typical bookshelf posts, but you can skim through and see if any of my finds might be a good fit for you!

BOOK ONE: The Lost Letters of Pergamum

            My friend Julie loaned this to me after she talked about it in Bible study one evening, and I told her it sounded intriguing. This book is biblical fiction, which isn’t a genre I read in super heavily. Ryan told me he didn’t even know that was a genre, so let me share a little bit about what that means, in case you are also not familiar.

            Biblical fiction contains a mix of people we know to be historically true because they are mentioned in the Bible itself – and fictional characters added to round out the supposition of what life might have been like for a particular person from the Bible. Because it contains a mix of truth and fiction, it has to be read with care. It can be easy to mentally claim as truth something that really is only fiction. It can also be a bit difficult to understand because the ways of life really were so different back then.

            This book, The Lost Letters of Pergamum, is a story about life in the early church – the New Testament world. It’s written by a gentleman named Bruce W. Longenecker, who is a religion professor at Baylor University. (You know…where David Phelps went to college!) He’s written several other nonfiction books that I haven’t read, but this work of fiction was both captivating and informative for me.

            The book’s main character is a man named Antipas who is mentioned in Revelation 2. All we know of him from the Bible is that he was martyred in the city of Pergamum – because of his faith in Jesus Christ.

            The author says in the preface, “There must have been an intriguing series of events leading to Antipas’s punishing death. Those events, however, have been lost in the sands of time. We will never know who Antipas was or the episodes that provoked his martyrdom. But we can speculate. And that is what transpires in this story – a story that arises from one supposition, one fact, and one tradition.”

            The remainder of the book is written in the style of letters that we know (from the New Testament itself) were prevalent in those days. Antipas writes to Luke – yes, the Luke from the Bible. Over the course of the letters, Antipas shares his beliefs in the gods common to the world, and Luke so gently shares the good news of Jesus with him.

            Throughout the book, familiar names appear: Stephen, Paul, Peter, and Jesus. There are also other characters, entirely fictional, who make their way onto the pages to round out this story.

            What I loved most about the book was the opportunity to learn more about what life was like in those days. The modes of transportation, the sport of gladiator games, the occupations....it was interesting to learn about history through fiction.

            The hardest thing (for me) about the book was remembering that it was fiction. It even had footnotes that were also fictional. (In the very back of the book is a list from each chapter that clarifies what was true and what was fiction.)

            The book isn’t terribly long – only a couple hundred pages – but I did have to settle into the mindset of a different time period and way of speaking.  (The style of the letters holds much formality and respect, even in differing opinions.)

            I’m glad I read this, even though it was outside my typical book comfort zone. It was meaningful and thought-provoking! And as a writer, I’m really impressed at the author’s ability to craft something like this!

BOOK TWO: The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass, Christian Speaker, Aged 45 3/4

            My next book was another borrowed one – this time from my friend Jonathan! He told me he thought I would love the content and the humor, and he was not wrong. The book is titled The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass, Christian Speaker, Aged 45 ¾. Yes, that is the whole book title. Adrian Plass is a real person – a British author – who has written several books. Though the character in the book shares his real-life name, the book is fiction – and so, so funny. I snorted right out loud several times while reading it.

            Adrian (the character) is a speaker and minister who keeps a record of his speaking and church-leading adventures in diary format. He’s married to Anne, and their grown son, Gerald, has recently moved home, citing vague reasons of searching for something regarding the next chapter of life. Adrian has just been invited to speak in Australia, which now means he can claim the status of “international speaker,” and it blows his mind.

            He wrestles with a genuine desire to be used by God and the equally genuine thoughts of irritation and fear that plague him in ministry. (Some of those things hit too close to home for this writer’s heart, for sure! Life imitates art?)

            I also have to add that I think I like his son, Gerald, even more than I like him. While home, searching for what would be next in his life, Gerald tags along with Adrian to his speaking events and often graces him with hilariously written parodies of letters, feedback, and even takes on Scripture. I think my favorite was the one where Gerald retold the parable of the Prodigal Son, telling it more as we probably would find “fair” – both funny and sobering to read.

            I read sections of this book to Ryan, because they made me laugh so much, and I also took away from the book meaningful reminders of checking my own spirit as I speak and share with groups. I appreciate a book that can both entertain and convict me, and this book did just that. I didn’t find the British brogue or occasional language barrier/translation to be off-putting as I read. I also tried to read with an accent, but I’m not sure I did a very good one, mentally.

            This book is only about 170 pages and even has a handful of illustrations throughout, so it’s a quick read and lighthearted for the most part.

BOOK THREE: Deadliest in Show

            Next up? Deadliest in Show by Christy Barritt. Ryan saw it on the free table at work a few months ago and brought it home for me to read before returning it for someone else. Finally got to it! This book is part of the “Creative Woman” mysteries and is basically a Hallmark Mystery Movie in print.

            Though this book was down the line in a series about the characters within, and I could tell I had missed some background information from previous books, it was still fine to jump in and start reading here. The book is about a Scottish artist and small-business owner who has relocated to the Pacific Northwest. She’s a widow and mother of two college-age children, and she has a hobby of helping solve mysteries.

            She’s selling her jewelry at a local craft show when the artist at the booth next to her, Sunny, drops dead in the middle of the show. Sunny is young and healthy, and nothing about her death makes any sense.

            As Shannon starts her own investigation, she starts receiving mysterious notes that sometimes seem to be cheering her on and at other times are warning her to be careful.

            The book is a little over 200 pages and reads very quickly. If you like a feel-good mystery, this is a good one. And a fun bonus? It’s published by Annie’s, which is a publishing company right here in our own county!

BOOK FOUR: The Stories We Tell

            And then…I moved on to The Stories We Tell by Joanna Gaines. This book was another hand-me-down that had been sitting in my to-be-read pile for a while.

            It’s no secret I love Joanna and Fixer Upper and Magnolia…you get the idea. And while I did enjoy the book and underlined many sentences and found much worth ingesting, I don’t know that it was my favorite thing I’ve ever read from Joanna.

            The premise of the book is something I can very much relate to. Joanna talks about how every piece of our story matters. That’s a message I’m certainly passionate about, and I think most of you know it. And though I find Joanna lovely inside and out, she writes candidly about her struggles to accept herself for who she is and battles she’s fought with anxiety and insecurity. I’ve fought those same things – and still do.

            I loved so much of what she said about learning to accept and value your own story and to keep writing and keep exploring the story you live. But every now and then, she’d go down a little trail that I wasn’t fully sure I agreed with. Those parts of the book had more to do about finding truth and freedom, which I find absolutely necessary, but she didn’t write about finding those things in and through Christ, and that’s a non-negotiable for me.

            So in that respect, I would have to say to hold her advice loosely, but for the majority of the book, I related to and appreciated her stories and advice.

            It was an easy book to read. Joanna writes like she talks, and it felt like a conversation with a friend. I did love that. And I appreciate her honesty about her struggles. It’s easy, when you see someone so beautiful and successful, to believe it’s always come easily, and it hasn’t for her.

            She sprinkled good nuggets throughout, and I think I’ll come back to those more than once!

BOOK FIVE: A Book of Simple Prayers

            A while back, I found a Gloria Gaither book for a quarter at the thrift store, so I bought it. I love Gloria’s writing; she’s so gifted.

            This book, A Book of Simple Prayers was written back in 2008. It’s small and a fast read, written as poetry. I’m typically not a huge lover of poetry, and written prayers are hit-and-miss for me. One of the churches Ryan and I attended years ago featured written prayers in each service, and I really didn’t like it. It didn’t feel Spirit-led to me at all. It felt prepared and almost like they didn’t trust their people to have a conversation with God, so they made them pre-submit written prayers for checking and editing.

            But again, I do love Gloria, and you really can’t beat a book for a quarter, so I bought it.

            And I loved it. Gloria explains at the start of the book that she  never intended to write a book of prayers, but for a season of her life, she wrote many prayers in her journal and over time, she decided to share some of them. They do not carry that edited feel to them at all. Though they are lyrical and beautiful, because that is how Gloria writes, they feel raw and from the heart.

            Reading through them quieted my own heart and reminded me that we are driven by what we consume. Reading prayers put me in a posture of prayer, and I loved that.

            And…if you’re in a season where you’re finding it hard to pray on your own, books like this one fill in the gap of words you can’t find it within yourself to utter. I’ll be keeping this one and drawing from it as I share with others!

BOOK SIX: Guilty Confections

            The last one that is going to make it into this recap, though not the last one I’ll squeeze in before the end of July is Guilty Confections by Karen Kelly. This book is part of the Chocolate Shoppe Mystery series, and I think we should pause right now to explore what a delight that series sounds like just from the mere series name!

            This is another book Ryan found on the free table at work and brought home for me to read, and it’s another one published by Annie’s Publishing here in our own county! It’s a cozy mystery series that feels like a Hallmark movie come to life.

            This looks like the second book in the series, so there was clearly a little backstory coming into the plot, but it didn’t slow me down. The book is set in a charming southern town filled with all kinds of proper southern history, sweet tea, thick family dynamics, and a young lady who has come back home after a broken relationship nearly broke her. She’s trying desperately to learn to bake so she can carry on the shop her family owns, but this is proving to be a bit of a challenge for her.

            As she tries to learn baking, she also finds an old diary in the attic of her grandmother’s home – a diary dating back to the Civil War era, and it holds a mystery she can’t help but explore. Unfortunately, even though many years have passed since the War, feelings still run strong in the townspeople, and Miss Jillian finds herself running up against some who wish she wouldn’t pry quite so hard.

            I won’t say it was my favorite mystery ever, but I enjoyed the setting enough to know I’d read another book in this series just for fun!

And that's it for this months' bookshelf! :) 

Day in the Life: A Sunday in July

 

This post concludes this year’s “Day in the Life” posts. I’ve now recapped every day of the week over seven months, and even though it’s true that life is always changing and some days look different now from the way they did earlier in the year, it’s been fun to chronicle this season!

A Sunday in July
Partly Cloudy, High of 81
Ryan is 45, Bekah is 46, Braeya is 18, and Lexi is 2

Morning

            We oversleep a little bit this morning, so we are thankful we built some margin into our (multiple) alarms. When we realize how late it is, we get up quickly, make the bed, and pour the coffee that brewed on a timer earlier. Braeya has been sleeping with us in bed but when we get up, she heads to her daytime napping spot and curls up.

            I’m also thankful I took time yesterday to chop up all the vegetables for our lunch, which I now dump into the slow cooker. It’s a pot roast kind of day!

            Ryan gets Lexi up and feeds her breakfast, while I assemble the lunch, and then he heads to the bathroom to get ready while he listens to the church worship set one more time. He’s on worship team this month and has been learning/refreshing on the songs all week long.

            With lunch in the slow cooker, I start getting ready for the day, too! Skin care, makeup, and hair!

            I notice how pretty it is out on the water this morning and pause to appreciate it before moving on to finish my tasks for the morning. I typically do some Bible study first thing, but since we overslept and have to be at church early, that will need to come later today.

            I pack my bag for church with my speaking Binder and Bible, Ryan’s Bible and notebook, and my laptop. Ordinarily I don’t take my laptop to church, but I have some extra responsibilities this month, and I need to make sure I have access to programs to make changes if needed. I load up water bottles and snacks, grab my purse, and put it all in a pile by the door.

            Lexi watches from the bed while I put on finishing touches, like jewelry. Ryan preps our travel mugs with coffee to go, and I remember I need to put a banana in the freezer for a smoothie later.

            I prepare some yogurt, granola, and berries to take with me, Ryan takes my capsule wardrobe photo, and we are ready to go!

            We climb into the car, Ryan prays for me (something he always does when I speak), and we get on the road! Our church is meeting at another location for a while, since our building is under construction, so we drive to the school that is our church for a while. I eat my breakfast on the way!

            We arrive at church and are among the first people there. I am so excited to discover the room is much cooler this week. Last week was so hot. My first order of business is to distribute the music binders for the worship team. I set them all up and hang out to talk with our worship leader for a while. He and Ryan are tag-teaming my friend Julie’s job this month. I’m doing the behind-the-scenes part of her job, making worship slides, filling music binders, and working on service plans. Yes, it takes three of us to do her work. 😊

            Worship team practice begins, and while they sing and play, I walk the aisles of the makeshift sanctuary, praying over each row. Then I sneak off to the teachers’ lounge to go over my message one more time.

            Since it’s still pretty empty in the building, I take a stroll through all of it, stopping to appreciate the classrooms and all the pretty décor the teachers have put up for their students. I find a copy of The Velveteen Rabbit and text it to Ryan as a joke. (I quote the line from Friends where Joey gives Kathy this book and tells her he got it for her because he knows she likes cheese.)

            I make it back to the sanctuary as worship team practice is ending, and Ryan does a sound check for his solo. He sounds so good!

            Sunday School begins, but Ryan and I stay out in the sanctuary to prepare our hearts and talk together. This day feels a bit like landing a plane without gear, and I don’t think either of us are terribly settled.

            We eat some protein balls and drink some water.

            The time for church draws closer, so I find my place at the front door with a box of fans and greet people as they enter – and share fans with them. I find a gentleman who is new and needs help finding a place to sit, so as the service begins, I track down the friend he has in the congregation and get them connected.

            Ryan helps lead the worship team, and I hang out with the ushers for the first part of the service.

            Ryan’s solo comes along, and I stand in the doorway to cheer him on while he sings.

            I’m so relieved that the technical pieces of the service go well, and we make it to the message time. Today’s sermon is about being determined. It feels messy in my head, but Ryan says it goes well, and I’m thankful for that.

            When the message is over, I go to the door to greet people and collect the fans I passed out earlier, and then I gather up all the music binders to take them back home.

            Ryan and I give a ride home to some of our friends’ kiddos, and then we head home too – via the gas station and a coke for Ryan.

            Lexi is so excited to see us when we get home! We change our clothes into grubbies immediately (the best part of every Sunday) and I shred the meat for lunch.

Afternoon

            We take our lunch outside to eat on the patio table. It’s so pretty out there! Lexi eats her Kong and Ryan and I have our roast beef, veggies, and homemade bread.

            After lunch, I come inside to unload/reload the dishwasher, and Ryan goes outside to water the lawn. When we had work done on our water-damage-causing patio last month, the equipment that came in and out damaged our neighbors’ yard. He’s been working hard to grow grass for them, and it’s been pretty dry this week. He rakes up some of the straw that has gotten too thick and starts the sprinklers.

            I refill the K-Cups in our little storage bin, make myself a cup of coffee, and head to the couch with Lexi to rest. We start Air Force One, which is actually one of my favorite movies, even though nothing about it would make you think it’s a favorite. Lexi refuses to settle down without Ryan in the house. She is such a creature of habit, and she knows Sunday afternoons are about couches, bully sticks, and naps. I’m so ready to sleep, but until Ryan comes back in, it’s not going to happen.

            Ryan finally comes in, Lexi gets her bully stick, and we all get our naps. Praise the Lord for Sunday afternoons. I look forward to them all week long.

            I wake up and get some cottage cheese and strawberries for my afternoon snack and decide to refresh my coffee, too. I finally get the chance to open my scrapbooks and do some scrappin’! I catch up Lexi’s book and start working on the next quarter of our year. This makes me so happy.

Evening:

            Ryan wakes up, Lexi hangs out with him, and I head upstairs to take pictures of my office for a blog post. It’s almost dinnertime, so I warm up leftover chicken enchilada zucchini boats and we eat in the living room at the sofa table.

            After dinner, Ryan goes back out to water the yard again, and I start printing pages for a little project I’m putting together for our pastor. (He’ll be back from his Sabbatical next month, and I’ve been working on a project for him.)

            Ryan strolls in and asks if I want to go for a sunset boat ride – yes please! So we pile on the boat and head out. It’s so pretty out, and we have the best time.

            When we come home, we’re all ready for a snack. Lexi has her last Kong for the day, I make a chocolate/peanut butter protein shake, and then I hit the couch to journal, do Bible study, read, and work on my day planner. I’m sad we’re almost to the end of our Sunday!

            I read the end of chapter 7 in my Jacob study by Darlene Schacht. I’ve been working on it for the past seven weeks and have learned so much. Then I moved on to Discovering Jesus in the Old Testament by Nancy Guthrie. I’m studying the life of David in 1 Chronicles right now, and I’m seeing insights I’ve never seen before. I read a passage from Today in the Word and wrap up studying a section in James about what it means to be a hearer of the Word – and to do what it says.

            When done with the study, I spend some time praying over some specific requests, and I work on my Psalm 119 memorization.

            I decide to pause and write the blog before I forget to do it. I’m writing a post about how I have re-seen our home office, so I’m excited to share it.

            Then I squeeze in my half hour of reading and finish the novel I’ve been reading for a couple of days. It’s called Guilty Confections and was a fun, easy read.

            While I work on all these things, Ryan washes the dishes and cleans up the kitchen. He gets the coffee set for morning, fills Lexi’s Kongs, and then it’s time for us to call it a night.

            Braeya wanders out right about the time we’re ready to go to bed, which is just on cue!

            I love Sundays, and this has been a great one!