Speaking Begins!

Speaking of speaking...we have a new podcast for you! Happy Tuesday! We would love for you to hang out with us for a half hour or so, and we hope somewhere along the way, we make you laugh!

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I wrestle often with the fine line of promoting my ministry and waiting for God to open doors. If you listen to absolutely ANY writing/speaking coach, you're likely to hear that you must, must, must chase down opportunities, market yourself, and be clearly present and visible in the online world if you want to have any chance at ministry opportunities. They tell you to grow your social media followings, develop email lists, and follow these specific formulas so people will know about you and want to bring you in.

They're not wrong. Those formulas are formulas because they've been proven to work.

But I'm not great at marketing myself. I'm much better at shouting out about a friend than I am about (what feels like) begging for my own self. And there's a big chunk of my soul that is truly content to wait for the Lord to open the doors HE wants to open rather than shoving them open myself.

This has been especially true in this season with Ryan's mom. It's been hard for me to know if it's wise to commit to things down the road, because I'm unsure of what will be happening with her. Where will I be needed? I don't want to sacrifice time Ryan might need me by his side to ask him to be beside me in ministry.

So for now, I've been very content to wait for the Lord to open doors, trusting that He will protect those days (since they were obviously His idea anyway).

Sunday morning was, therefore, my first speaking engagement of the year. I had been grateful for a silent January, because we were hardly home, and it would have been next to impossible to adequately prepare and do my job. But it's been so nice here in the month of February, to receive a handful of invitations (both for now and the future). It's nice to know God has some work for me to do, even in the middle of this busy time.

So on Sunday morning, Ryan and I went to see our friends at Hemlock Friends Church, which isn't far from home. We have the privilege of serving there a couple of Sundays a year, usually when their pastor is away on vacation or at a conference. We love that little congregation and consider all of them to be real-life friends, not just people we serve.

I was going to get a picture with the church before we went in, but alas, it was snow-globe-snowy when we arrived, and Ryan didn't want to mess up his hair. Oh wait. No, no that wasn't it. I didn't want to mess up my hair!

Ryan did get a couple of pictures of me while I spoke. I see 2019 still finds my hand gesture game going strong!

It has become somewhat of a tradition for us to also join a group of the people from this church for lunch after the service ends. They invited us again and asked what that restaurant was that Ryan loved so much. We determined they meant Prodigy, though the answer to that question could have been any one of a number of places! So off to Prodigy we went!

I don't remember the name of the burger he had this time, but it had a blue cheese/orange/dill sauce on it. Sounds kind of weird, but the waitress promised he would love it, and he did. Ate the whole thing all at once.

I went for BBQ, and it was fantastic. I'm kind of a BBQ sauce snob (read: I normally skip it entirely) but this was really, really good. I actually pretty much only ate the fries at lunch and had all the meat for dinner. :)

(Also: aren't the fry baskets the cutest things in the whole world?)

It turned out to be a great day with our friends from the Friends Church. I was so glad they were kind enough to invite us back. (Oh! And I spoke about communing from the heart. It was based on the blog post I wrote earlier last month.) A perfect launch to whatever God has for me in the land of speaking in 2019. I'm content to let Him open the doors I should walk through, and that will help me know I'm on HIS path!

DATE NIGHT!!

Ahhhhh…at long, long last, we had an honest-to-goodness Shafferland date night. And. It. Was. Glorious.

Because we were on duty at Ryan's mom's house on Valentine's Day, we had to take our date day on a different day. Ryan worked on Saturday, but for the first time in a long time, he got off work at lunchtime, so we were able to soak up the rest of the day together. I was absolutely giddy.

Weather wasn't an issue (insert praise hands here) so we were able to head down to Indianapolis for some fun! Ryan made lattes, and we set out!

For many months, we've been toying with the idea of replacing some of our furniture. (Some of ours has reached a point of life where it really would only fit in a youth room, so it's time to look at changes.) We enjoy visiting furniture stores to see what we can see. Or at least we usually enjoy visiting them. We really detest being accosted, so some stores are painful. But our first stop on Saturday was SO MUCH FUN!

We went to Bob's Discount Furniture. It was like the carnival of furniture stores. You'll see why in a moment.

To start though, forget furniture. How great would THIS be in our living room!??!?

We played musical furniture, hopping from one thing to the next, trying out comfort and being totally judgmental on looks. (You can do that with furniture. Just not people.)

And then I found this. And I was smitten, hopelessly in love, and ready to take him home to meet the family:

I cant even talk about it. How adorable is he??? (Ryan understands my unhealthy affection for cute desks and just said, "Did you want me to get your picture with it?")

Other amazing amenities of the store? A café where everything (candy, ice cream, and coffee) is FREE.

And the balloon animal artist gifted me the cutest ladybug.

So because we are entirely won over by free coffee and balloon animals, this was our favorite furniture store stop of the day and everything else failed to live up to the hype. Even stores we had previously ranked high on the list.

Things I learned in February: Ryan did not know about Half Price Books, which means I have entirely failed him as a wife. But he kindly took me to one and to my credit, I only purchased ONE book, which he actually scouted out for me!

We had some gift cards to use, and our dinner plan was to go to Abuelo's (or Alberto's, as Ryan calls it), but Ryan found out we also had a gift card to The Cheesecake Factory, so he suggested we go there, get a piece of cheesecake for each of us (to go) and then go to dinner. We could have dessert and coffee at home. OKAY!

So we went to The Cheesecake Factory. Waited in line for a half hour to ORDER two pieces of cheesecake. That was just to order. Then we waited another half hour for our two pieces to be boxed and handed to us. If you're counting, that's ONE HOUR IN LINE for dessert to go.

Know what will narrow down your choices REAL quick? Posted calorie counts. Some of the pieces had almost as many calories as the recommended daily allowance. I did discover, however, that they had a low carb cheesecake that you could get with fresh strawberries. I got that, and Ryan got the not-so-low-carb choice of a peanut butter cup concoction. :)

THEN we went to Abuelo's. It was pretty late (for dinner - at least on Bekah time) when we arrived, but there was a line, so we had to wait again. Our waiter was fantastic, and we tried to be nicer to him than the people at the table next to us, who kept telling him how hungry they were. Well, you know, it's a restaurant, so hunger is somewhat a given. (Eyeroll.)

We shared a fajita dinner, so please note that the plate in each of our pictures is actually the SAME plate. My mom thought we both got one of those! (I sure hope the Romaine recall is over because I had that as my tortilla shell!)

(We also had leftovers on that, by the way.)

When we were done with dinner, we came home, brewed some coffee, and dug into our cheesecake. Braeya was not interested in the low carb version.

This was seriously such a fun day for us. It was just what we needed, and I loved every single minute. Three cheers for date nights! And gift cards! Thank you, gift card givers!

The Shafferland Shuffle

Good morning!! Happy Sunday to you! Hope you're having a good start to your day! I'm speaking at a church this morning and am looking forward to seeing friends while we are there!

Meanwhile, here's what we've been up to this week.

* We had just gotten home from church last week when it started snowing. It was all pretty and snow-globey. It was also very treacherous, so I was glad to be INSIDE my house. I read a lot of accident reports that day! We had stuffed burgers and salads for lunch and a glorious day at home, resting. (Ryan needed it after his day on the slopes and I needed it after my day in the lodge - ha!)

* I made some chocolate banana muffins on Monday morning - to supply our breakfasts for the week. But someone brought Ryan biscuits and gravy, which somehow topped my healthy muffins. LOL!! I made dinner to take out to his mom's that night, including chicken bacon ranch eggrolls, which were very delicious. While we were caring for her, this major freezing rain/ice situation settled over central Indiana, so we had a slow drive home. I was quite thankful to be safely back in our garage!

* Tuesday morning, I found Braeya cuddled up next to the white noise machine. She must crave it as much as I do! :) That afternoon I met up with one of the pastors at our church. She and I had coffee and talked for two and a half hours. I needed it! And that night, Ryan made me an affogato for dessert! (If you've not had one, it's kind of like a root beer float - except you use coffee instead of root beer.)

* Ryan had a dentist appointment Wednesday morning (to replace a lost filling). He was numb the rest of the day, and boy do I ever feel that pain!! He is such a grown up about the dentist, unlike his wife. I had done so much cooking earlier in the week that I sort of lost my culinary drive, so Ryan was a darling and ordered pizza! And we both scrambled to make sure al Valentine surprises were ready to go by the end of the night.

* You already read about our actual Valentine's Day. It wasn't our typical day, and that was a little bit hard for me, because I take it pretty seriously. But we did our best to enjoy and have fun, and I think we did it! We were on duty at his mom's that night and she had several visitors (family members) so we got to socialize a bunch! I also took the liberty of enjoying the roses Allen had given her. :)

* Friday afternoon, I was menu planning when my mom called and said she wanted to bring us coffee. Wasn't that nice? I sent her our order and she hand delivered our favorites to us! I think that gave us both just the boost of energy we needed to do a hard workout. (No, the tissues are not for sweating. I use the little packets to count my rounds! Ha!) I asked Ryan if we could just stay home that night and do nothing at all. He said yes! So we pulled out Mo, curled up, ate dinner, watched movies, and had the best night of NOTHING.

* Yesterday was an utter delight. Ryan had to work, but he actually got off around lunch time, and we got the whole rest of the day to go on a date! We went down to Indianapolis, did some fun shopping, had our belated Valentine's Day dinner (and dessert!) and had the best time together. Did a world of good in both our hearts, I think!

The Saturday Six

One.

Some of you may remember that almost a year ago, I asked for prayer for a friend of mine who was very ill with a sudden heart issue. She received a transplant but had a stroke shortly after surgery and passed away. Throughout the past year, her mom and sisters have become advocates in educating others about the condition that caused Michelle's illness. This week, Michelle's sister (who was actually pregnant at the time Michelle died) shared this link for women who are pregnant or have given birth within the last few months. It's a quiz you can take to determine if you might be at risk for the same heart condition. If you, your friends, or your family fall into this category, take a look at this or pass it along. I know that I had no idea this was even a thing until Michelle, so I'm sure it might be new for some of you too!

Two.

This is such a cool story! Deborah Raney is an author my sister introduced me to (not personally) years ago, and I've enjoyed reading her posts in addition to reading her books. In this post, she talks about running across an old Bible years ago and eventually connecting with the owner's family.

Three.

Perhaps I'm kidding myself (I've been known to do it) but I don't feel like I have comparison issues when I see practically perfect homes posted online. I know their homes aren't always that tidy, more than likely, and I just try to appreciate what I see and move on. But I know for a lot of people, that IS a big issue. Messes are real and it's hard to see these magazine-ish homes gracing the social media world when your own house is covered in projects, laundry, and more. I appreciated Katie's post this week where she showed real pictures of their (very beautiful!) home. Maybe more bloggers should do a post like that so we can know they're human!

Four.

You know I love houses and house plans, so this article fascinated me. I knew about the old Sears kit homes, but seeing some of the plans - and PRICES - totally intrigued me! Check this out!

Five.

After Christmas, I put away all the pretty decorations and pulled out my January décor. It's made up mostly of snowman/snowflake/snowball stuff. It seemed appropriate to keep it out for February, since we're still Polar Vortexing over here, and I just pulled out the handful of specific Valentine decorations to add to it. But in less than half a month, I'm no longer welcoming snow in my life, and all the pink hearts will need to go back in their box for another year, too. So I'm lookin ahead to March/April spring décor. I have a few specific Easter decorations in my arsenal, but I don't have much that's just spring. So this post was inspirational for me! Anyone else ready to put away wintry décor in favor of welcoming spring?

Six.

My sister knows (and feeds) my love for books, so one of my Christmas gifts this year was a delightful, full-color book called Shed Décor. Lori and I share a fondness for tiny homes, she-sheds, and all such cuteness, so this book was a nod to that love. When I first received it, I immediately flipped through it to look at all the pretty pictures, but I wanted to go back and officially read it, so last week I did just that!

The book is written by Sally Coulthard, and apparently she had previously written a book called Shed Chic, which was a book-tour of all different kinds of sheds and cabins people could have, as well as giving them ideas for how to use them in practical ways. That book had more to do with the construction and use of the buildings, but this one is more about the decorating.

My. Happy. Place.

Since my only degree in interior design is fully granted by way too many hours of decorating shows on TV, it's fair to say there are many things I don't actually know about design and décor. This book explains (in easy-to-understand terms) the differences among styles like rustic, vintage, retro, country, etc. It also shows the different elements you can use to achieve the actual style and not a mish-mash that only proves you didn't quite know what you were doing.

Sally explains how to use different textures together to achieve a pleasing look, which is especially important in a really small space. Everything matters in a small space, if you don't want it to look cluttered and cause you to feel overwhelmed.

Throughout the book are pictures of actual sheds used for all different kinds of purposes. From little backyard hideaways to guest spaces to art studios to garden sheds, there were tons of ideas! She also gave instructions on how to equip the sheds to be useful as well as decorate them to be pleasing.

(About halfway through, I wanted to pack up and head to the Treasure Mart here in town to apply my newly learned shopping techniques!)

Though I don't feel that I'm ready to take on a new career in design, I did learn a lot from the book and it was almost like a virtual vacation to get to visit all these little sheds in a variety of unique settings. (Ryan, I promise not to ask for a she-shed of my own. Today, anyway.)

Who should read this book? If you enjoy reading or learning about design, there are many things for you inside this book. If you have a secret (or not-so-secret!) fascination with she-sheds and tiny homes, this book will feed your hungry imagination. If you like to look at pictures as much as (or more than) reading text, this is a great pick, because the pictures are plentiful and of excellent quality!If you like a good coffee-table style book to have on display or in your library, this is a good one.

Thanks, Lori, for my fun book! And thank you for inspiring me to think about specifics in my decorating. I feel some shopping trips looming. Don't tell Ryan. :)

Valentine's Day

Happy Friday, friends! Hope you're having a good start to your day. Anyone else glad to see a weekend arrive?

We didn't get to have our traditional Valentine's Day this year, because we were on duty taking care of Ryan's mom. It was still important to me to celebrate the day as much as we could and as normally as we could, so I did my very best to make that happen.

Ryan surprised me when I woke up by supplying not just coffee, but my favorite donut and some beautiful roses! (There isn't a picture of the donut. It didn't survive long enough to be photographed - ha!)

Ryan went to work and I spent the morning trying to get chores done around the house, so we could have our Valentine's Day celebration when he came home for lunch! It wasn't an impressive lunch in terms of food (hello, leftover pizza!) but we did exchange our gifts, since it was the only time we would really be able to have alone together the entire day.

I think I win the prize for biggest card given. Isn't it great!!?!!?

His gift from me was an underwater camera. We go on all these adventures that involve water, and we live in fear of messing up our phones and cameras, so I thought it was high time we got a waterproof camera. That way whenever we kayak or hike around waterfalls or whatever, we're all set! (He was excited about this...mostly because I think it was an invitation to more adventures that stretch me beyond my comfort zone.)

In addition to the roses, Ryan got me candy (YAY!!!) and a great new shirt. My old coffee shirt is starting to show a lot of wear and tear, so this will be a fantastic replacement. I love it. (He's also planning a date for later this weekend to make up for what we weren't able to do on the actual day.)

After he went back to work, I spent the entire afternoon putting together what I hoped would be a good dinner for us, even though we wouldn't be together just the two of us. I made a white chicken lasagna soup (Dashing Dish) and cheddar biscuits, which are a clean eating version of the Red Lobster biscuits. I made a pan of double chocolate raspberry brownies for dessert and packed it all up for our trip to see his mom.

We tried to take an official Valentine photo when he got home, but I think my camera needs a good cleaning, and we were apparently also not on our game, because out of thirty attempts (not exaggerating) this is the best I have.

We headed toward his mom's house, and yes, this was taken safely at a stoplight.

We shared dinner with her, and she said it was good! She was pretty tired last night, and we were glad to see that she was able to rest better than she had on our first stay of the week. That night was a rough one!

I felt we did a pretty great job of celebrating, even though the day and night were both full of things that didn't lend themselves to quietness and romance. (We did sneak in a quick dance in the cabin after she went to sleep. That was sweet.)

Thanks for making the day wonderful, Ryan! I hope you felt as loved as I did!

Layers of Love

Happy Valentine's Day!

For all of you who may not be huge fans of this day, I send a big bloggy hug your way. I remember the years of pizza, Blizzards, and dressing in black, rolling my eyes at every flower delivery that came into the office. I'm sorry today hurts.

For all of you (married or single) who don't care about this day one iota, that's okay too! Enjoy your Thursday!

Today, though, as we observe our Valentine's Day here in Shafferland, I want to talk about layers of love.

I remember our first Valentine's Day and how excited I was to finally have a Valentine. I'd never had a boyfriend (or fiancé) on Valentine's Day in my entire life. I still never have. One year I was single on that day and the next year I was married! But I so looked forward to that day and having someone to spoil. Ryan made my dreams come true by sending me flowers at work (another first for me), and we had a romantic dinner at home that night, which we made and enjoyed together.

We've lived a lot of life since that first Valentine's Day back in 2013.

My excitement for the day hasn't changed. I'm still looking forward to spoiling Ryan. I'm still excited to get flowers. I've planned a special menu for us. This day still matters to me every bit as much as it did six years ago.

But there are more layers to our love now than there were back then. The excitement isn't less. But it is deep.

I thought about it the other night, when I watched Ryan staying up later than I knew he wanted to so he could study his Bible for a while longer.

It made me remember our dating days, when we first studied the Bible and prayed together. We were excited to do those things, but we were nervous to share our thoughts so vulnerably for the first time. And now, we are many layers deep into that part of our relationship. We love to study. We love to share things we've learned in our own personal study times. We love to pray together. We love praying for one another even when we're apart. We have layers to this part of our love that weren't there back then.

I thought about it earlier this week when I watched Ryan take care of his mom. His patience is unending.

While my patience level has grown from the nonexistence it used to be in my teens and twenties, I am still amazed at just how patient he is all the time. Even when he's tired. Even when he's exasperated. Even when there's no end to the need. He's always patient, always upbeat, always encouraging. And while I've never been one to subscribe to the theory that if you want to know how a man will treat you, watch how he treats his mother, I will say that I know the same love and respect he shows to her every time he cares for her reflects the same love and respect he shows to me and everyone else in his path. I knew he was a good man when I married him, but this journey has shown me layer after layer after layer of goodness and patience.

I think about it every day when I see the new love note he's left in his February project of love notes.

Every day he hangs a new heart on my dresser, and every one has a note of something he loves about me. About us. And I know talk can be cheap, so let me say that these notes (which I ADORE, by the way) are just one way he shows love. He gives me living love notes all the time. Earlier this week he happened to remember that I enjoy affogatos when we're out on dates, and he made me one at home. (He doesn't even like them, but he makes a good one!) He remembers to turn on the mattress warmer on the bed every night so it's toasty when I crawl in. He pours my first cup of coffee every morning. He cleans up after Braeya when she gets sick because he knows fluids aren't my forte. He puts gas in the car because he doesn't want me to have to stand out in the Polar Vortex to do it myself.

I knew he was considerate and generous when I married him, but I'm learning new layers of how he shows love every single day. He's consistent and yet constantly new in his offerings.

This love thing really does get deeper with time. I'd read about it in books before I was married, but it's true. Ryan provides a great example for living in love. I learn from him all the time, and I'm very grateful to have a husband who does more than buy flowers and dinners on Valentine's Day - though I will give three cheers for that. He offers layers and layers of love for me and for all who encounter him.

Happy Valentine's Day, Ryan! Thank you for giving layers of depth to this love we share. I love you so much!