Saturday Suggestions

 

Happy Saturday, friends! I have some fun (and even a funNY) find for you today. I hope you enjoy exploring these links!

ONE. 

I told you earlier this week that Ryan and I are determined to become more intentional about our rest on Sundays. I also told you that while I know it’s highly controversial about whether or not resting includes a break from technology, at this point, we don’t feel a conviction to turn off screens on Sundays. One of our favorite things is to watch funny video clips that make us giggle. (Or Tim Hawkins sketches…though you gotta be careful about those. We watched one where he picked on a phrase, and don’t you just know it, I heard it IN CHURCH the next week and laughed so hard at the most inappropriate time!!) Ryan sent me this clip a few days ago, and it made me laugh because THIS WOULD HAPPEN TO US!!!!! This is the kind of belly-laugh rest I enjoy.

TWO. 

Remember when I told you about the ultimate world cruise that sets sail later this year? It really is fascinating to read all about it, so if you want to learn more, you can visit this page! You can see the full itinerary, check out a map that shows the route, and see pictures from the ports of call along the way! And I’m curious (if you take a look at it) which place(s) would be your favorite to see in real life!

THREE.

I haven’t tried this one yet, so I can’t vouch for how tasty it might (or might not) be, but I found a recipe for a healthy version of Arby’sJamocha shake. I can assure you the real thing is not healthy from any angle. I really do want to try this one so I can see if the taste even remotely resembles the original. If you try it first, let me know!

FOUR. 

This is the link to the workouts Ryan and I landed on for thisyear. I learned about them because a fashion blogger I follow on Instagram shared at the end of 2022 that she had been doing them for a year and really enjoyed them and had seen marked improvement in her strength. (She was thin to start with, so she didn’t need to work out to lose weight, but she wanted to become stronger and healthier.) As you know, I’ve been desperate to find a workout program I actually enjoy, so we decided to go for this one. It’s free on YouTube, and there are multiple programs. We are currently working our way through Epic I. I love it that she doesn’t talk during the workouts and there are preview videos during each rest to show you what move is coming next. Ryan can use heavier weights to make his workout appropriately difficult for him, and I can modify as needed if something is too hard for me. We can work out at home on our own time, and we’re both already seeing slow changes!

FIVE. 

Even though I don’t think I’ve found my secret gift (yet), I do enjoy exploring different ideas. Not long ago, I watched some videos about learning to play the harp, because that has, for many years, been a talent I have thought I’d thoroughly enjoy. I don’t know that it’s something that I could successfully do, but I had fun watching some of the explanation videos on this YouTube channel – as well as some of the clips of the YouTuber playing the harp at events. She is quite talented! (Can we also just pause to appreciate her accent??)

SIX. 

I told you about some of the fun we had on our dates this month. Most of ours revolved around food, rather than adventure, and that’s mostly because that’s what we had time for this month. We do love taking part in more creative dates when we have the time and resources, and this list has several fun ideas on it!! If you’re in a date-night rut, try looking for an idea here! (Also fun ideas for just hanging out with friends, if that suits you better.)

Have a great week, friends!

Winter Dates

 

            Ryan and I purposed, this month, to be intentional about a weekly date. We did not think this would be a difficult thing to achieve, but we were wrong. We are in a strange season right now, trying to finish our work at the new house so we can move into it, which, of course, means packing the current house, too. We’re playing a significant amount of divide-and-conquer, which we both really hate. Meanwhile, I'm still learning my new job...and we have a dog. We love her to pieces, but we've learned that being dog-parents means we lack the freedom to be gone for wildly extended periods of time, and that has made our dates look a bit different this month.

            Our first week’s date was our monthiversary, and I already told you it didn’t quite go as planned. We were going to watch a movie at home together while eating popcorn and drinking hot cocoa bombs. Alas, we couldn’t find a movie we liked, and we were too full for popcorn. So it turned out to be hot cocoa bombs and an episode of Mad About You. Oh! And a good heart-to-heart talk. It was a good date, but it was not as planned, and you know what that does to a couple of planners like us!

            We had grand plans for the second week’s date. We were volunteering together at our church’s free clothing boutique, and after that, we were going to try out a café nearby and then Ryan was going to work at the house and I was going to a baby shower out of town. Unfortunately, after we did the time-math on that, we realized we would be gone far too long to be fair to Lexi, so we did a plan B again!

            We had to run to Fort Wayne for a quick errand one evening, so while we were there, we stopped at Panera for dinner. (Thank you, Ryan’s Dad and Lynn, for the gift card!) We spent two beautiful hours in there, enjoying our food but also enjoying good, old-fashioned conversation. It was so much fun to just sit and talk without feeling in a hurry! I truly don’t remember the last time we just sat for a long time to talk over dinner. We’re always on the run. Sitting has become a lost art. This date showed us why we should find the art again.

            A bonus? Before we left, we ran into one of our friends! None of us live in Fort Wayne, but we all happened to be at Panera at the same time. That was fun!

            The third week, we didn’t want to have to travel too far or commit to a whole dinner out on the town. A coffee date sounded delightful, but we have learned that in this area, the coffee shops just don’t stay open past 5 p.m. Some close in the early afternoon, even. We were so spoiled in Marion, when we lived by TWO coffee shops that stayed open until 10 or 11 p.m. But Ryan found one in our general area that stayed open until 7 p.m. a couple of nights each week, so we decided to go there for our coffee shop date!

            It was so fun for us to go there because it’s one of our favorite shops out of all the MANY we have visited throughout our marriage. It was one of our first county date locations back in 2014, and it was the shop we looked at purchasing just a couple of years after that. (We have often wondered how different our life would look if we had really done it!) People came in and out while we were there, but not many stayed, so we tucked ourselves away in a booth and had a great conversation before making our way back home to resume our chores and responsibilities.

Our week four date happened just last night! We have friends in town to visit, so we decided to take them out to the Mexican restaurant here in town for a double date! We had the best time catching up after not seeing each other in person for about two years. (And the food was so good!)

            I am so happy we were able to go out four times this month…and every single one was different! Simple variety = good dates. 

What if This is Your Secret Gift?

 

            I don’t remember now what sparked the conversation, but I won’t soon forget the conversation itself.

            I have a handful of friends I talk to through the Marco Polo app, and one of them is my former co-worker, Abagail. She’s the friend I filled in for at the Kokomo church while she was on maternity leave, right before the pandemic. She had been my friend even before that, and after our paths ran parallel for that work season, we became even closer. I love chatting with her and hearing about the things happening in her world throughout each week. (She has two kiddos now, so there are always stories.)

            Back when I was still looking for work, we talked about vocations (though I don’t remember the context) and Abagail said something I’d never before considered. She said sometimes she wonders if there’s something out there in the great wide world that she would be so talented at doing, but she’s never done it and doesn’t know it’s her secret gift.

            (As a quick note…Abagail is marvelously talented in so many areas. She is creative and organized, and I haven’t met anyone else in my life who can cook, bake, or throw a party quite like she can – no exaggeration. She has a background in culinary arts, but her skills in quality and presentation are a natural gift that can’t possibly be learned in a classroom setting.)

            Abagail went on to say that sometimes she dreams about trying this hobby or that – or even a particular career – and she wonders if she might find it’s her gift she never knew she had.

            I thought back to my days in Financial Aid. I would call myself an okay counselor. It wasn’t a natural gift for me. I didn’t love it. I found aspects that I could do well, but the job as a whole was most certainly not my secret gift.

            Then I went into radio, and at the beginning, I was terrible. I’ve heard my early recordings, and they are nothing short of intensely painful. I like to think I improved over the four years I was there, and of all the jobs I’ve ever had, I felt like that one ended up feeling the most natural to me. It’s subjective to say I felt I was gifted in it, but from where I sat, it felt like the closest thing to a secret gift I’ve ever known.

            While I improved in what I did in my advocate work at WillowBridge, I don’t think I could be remotely accused of being gifted at that. And the jury is still out on my work in writing grant proposals. I hope I find a natural gifting in it, but we’ll see.

            Writing is the only hobby I’ve ever found that tends to flow effortlessly out of me. I wish I could sit and play the piano beautifully, but after eleven years of practice and lessons, I think we can safely say it’s not my first and most effortless gift. Singing isn’t the secret gift either – and great apologies go to the shower and car for that truth. I took sign language lessons for a while too, and perhaps I could have continued to hone those skills if my lessons had continued, but they didn’t.

            Maybe there’s a hobby out there somewhere I haven’t uncovered just yet that will flow from me so easily that I won’t be able to turn away from it. Could it be playing the harp? Watercolor painting? Making bread? I don’t know. I haven’t found it yet.

            Still, I love the idea that something could be lurking around the corner that I could call my secret gift. What a pleasant surprise it would be to uncover it and live in the joy of using it.

            What would you want your secret gift to be?

Healthful Habits

 

This is an ironic post to follow the one about love tasting like a jamocha shake. I acknowledge it! We are nearly a month into this new year, officially hitting the time when so many have abandoned their good intentions for the year. It’s so easy to do. The discipline of pressing on is exceedingly difficult. What’s the saying? If it were easy, everyone would be doing it.

            Ryan and I have clawed our way into this year, grasping desperately at some of the habits we intended to change about our lives. Two of those were health-related, so I thought they deserved a spot in our conversation this week.

            Before January even arrived, I spent a couple of hours laying out the meal plans for our entire month. I have a secret hope that if I can keep this up for a “mere” twelve months, I will have a nearly-lifelong meal plan structure that I can use in years to come, saving myself so much time. I can swap out meals here and there for variety, but I won’t have to sit and really work through hard-core planning in the future if I’m consistent this year.

            I suppose it remains to be seen if I can continue this, but I’ve worked hard at January, anyway! In the interest of transparency, I will confess that the thing I’ve hated most about our January meal plans has been cooking when I’m bone-weary and don’t want to do it. But I also have tried so hard to view cooking as an act of worship. I’ve been praying as I cook, thanking God for providing for us financially so we can purchase the food and for giving me a love of working in the kitchen so that creating healthful meals for the two of us is something I am able to do and (usually) want to do.

            And on those days I really don’t want to participate, I remind myself that this is part of the discipline. As my health coach told me last year, if nothing changes, nothing changes. If I want to see change in who I am, I have to put in the work of cooking healthful meals.

            I remember one Sunday, in particular, we were driving home from church, and the meal plan was to make homemade pizza with a healthy crust and healthy toppings. The only thing I wanted to do on that drive home from church was to swing through Little Caesars and get a hot and ready box for home. Ryan talked me out of It, and though I don’t know that I could be accused of being overly happy about it in the moment, I was glad for his accountability in the long run.

            In full disclosure, there was another day, later, when we were running behind and decided to get the Hot and Ready box from Little Caesars. All things in moderation. We did well once, and we gave in once. Overall, we’re improving.

            We still go out to eat. We still get treats. But the bulk of our food is prepared at home in healthful ways.

            And then there are the workouts. We started at the beginning of January, and I wish you could have been here to see me on day five. Day one? Leg day. Day two? Upper body. Day three? Abs and core. Thank goodness for a recovery day on day four, because I couldn’t move ANYTHING by then. Day five was dumbbell day, and I told Ryan I enjoyed that one most of all. He was gone on day six, when I did a HIIT workout on my own. I am not exaggerating when I tell you that every other move was a burpee. EVERY. OTHER. ONE. I hate burpees. They are my least favorite exercise of all time. And I had to do them for half the workout. I was mostly belly flopping on the floor by the end of it. It wasn’t pretty. I think Lexi thought I was injured. She was hanging over the baby gate, whining and looking awfully concerned. I tried to reassure her that I was okay, but I’m not sure I was very convincing.

            But here we are, almost a month in, and we’re still going. We’re still cooking healthful meals. We’re still working out. We’re still attempting to incorporate rest and good conversation and all the things that make life well-rounded without including a single dumbbell.

            It’s hard to make new habits. It’s hard to carve out the time. It’s hard to keep going when you’re bored and tired and sore and really want nothing more than to go back to the blessed familiar. It’s hard when the people around you aren’t used to the new schedules and presume you have all the same time and energy to do whatever you used to do. New habits are an adjustment ALL the way around.

They are, however, completely doable – with grit and determination! Don’t give up just because it’s uncomfortable. I’m cheering you on today, friends! Let’s keep going and pursuing our best work.

Love Tastes Like a Jamocha Shake

 

Last month, we met up with Ryan’s dad, stepmom, and grandma to enjoy dinner together at Cracker Barrel. It was just before Christmas, and the hostess seated us at a round table in the farthest section. The only other people in that area were gathered at a long table down the middle of the room. They were in their own world, and we were in ours. All of us were blissfully separated from the chaos of the main part of the restaurant – and the heat of the fireplace!

            Ryan’s grandma, who just turned 95 a few weeks earlier, had so many stories for us, including some about her healthy sweet tooth. She talked about her love for milkshakes, and how sometimes Ryan’s stepmom brings her one, and she can’t help but drink the whole thing, even if she really is supposed to watch her sugar.

            The longer we talked about milkshakes, the more I wanted one! Milkshakes are a deep love of mine, and I rarely have them, because I can’t stop. I would guess I drink two or three a year, and I savor every sip.

            Speaking of dessert, I thought we were ordering some that night at Cracker Barrel, so I stopped eating dinner well before I was satisfied, leaving room for something warm and delicious.

            And then no one ordered dessert.

            And then we drove out of the parking lot and right past the Burger King and its milkshake machine.

            And then we were home, and I was hungry and craving a milkshake.

            Missing dessert wasn’t my only woe that night. My mind raced with dozens of things that I couldn’t control, but neither could I control the need to think about them. I mentally rearranged our next home about a dozen times that night. I worried about my abilities to do my new job. I lamented the busyness of the season and all the friends I wished I could sit with, but none of us had time.

            And even Ryan…I missed him so. At that time, he was gone nearly every evening - all evening - working on some projects at the new house. They were things I didn’t know how to do, so I couldn’t help. He would work late, come home, eat dinner – hours after Lexi and I had already eaten – and then he would fall asleep watching TV. I missed seeing him and talking to him.

            The cherry on top of the night was that Braeya was up the entire night, ready to talk and play. She settled down right about the time the alarm went off, and I thanked the Lord (quite genuinely) that I did not have to drive to the office that day. My lackluster attempt at “work hair” and I made it to the table to work.

            Ryan was gone again the next night, working on the house again, and when he walked in the door about 9 p.m. to find chili simmering on the stove, he held out his gift to me: a jamocha shake.

            I was too tired to cry out loud, but I cried in my soul.

            I don’t need elaborate dates, jewelry, new clothes, or anything extravagant. I can find a giant heap of love packed into a milkshake from a drive-thru.

            Of course, it really wasn’t about the milkshake. It was all about Ryan remembering my longing for a special treat and hearing my heart in the middle of the night when he awakened to find me crying over living room furniture arrangement and worrying over my general level of intelligence. It was about the way he understood that long days and evenings apart really do make me miss him so very much.

            That night, love tasted like a jamocha shake. Cold coffee and an extra spoonful of love mixed all the way through.

The Lure of the World Cruise

 

I have often said that my travel dreams are largely confined to the United States (or North America, to be more specific). It’s not that I think the rest of the world has nothing to offer, but my speed bumps in world travel are my lack of love for flying and my lack of ability to speak other languages. There is something about being unable to communicate that terrifies me.

            In North America, I can drive where I need to go (or ride comfortably as Ryan’s passenger) and I can speak the language nearly everywhere. Those things comfort me and draw me to explore close to home.

            Happily, North America is full of so much that I really want to see. Mountains, deserts, oceans, rivers, forests, plains…so much variety. I’m content to stay in the drivable zone because I genuinely desire to see what’s in my own (very large) backyard.

            But during a Facebook scroll last year, I saw a post about the ultimate world cruise, and I confess: it piqued my interest.

A ship in the Royal Caribbean fleet will leave Miami on December 10^th, and for 274 days, they’ll sail all around the world, stopping on every single continent and in 64 countries. Can you imagine? All seven continents in one trip – and in less than a year at that?

            Other than getting to Miami, flying is not involved in this adventure, which is why I first took notice. I also told Ryan that the idea of being able to sleep and eat in a place that seems like home (the ship) is also a draw.

            As you might imagine, what did not draw us in was the price tag. To get a balcony room – which I would most certainly want if I’m spending 274 days on a ship – starts at $82,000 a person. We don’t have that kind of pocket change begging to be spent, unfortunately. And I’m fairly certain they aren’t looking for mascots, so our pets would have to stay home, and I can’t bear to be without them that long.

            But back to the price tag: it comes out to about $300 a day, which initially sounded astronomical to me, but when I think about all it covers, it makes a measure of sense in my mind. That daily price covers a room to live in, airfare to and from the cruise, a hotel room and gala entry the night before the cruise, transportation to and from the airport, hotel, and ship, beverages throughout the duration of the cruise, internet access, gratuities, laundry service, and more food than any one person could ever hope to eat in 274 days. (If you’ve been on a cruise before, you know the food is plentiful!) And then, of course, the ship has pools and entertainment and a gym and housekeeping …so that $300 a day really does cover quite a bit. Can you even put a price tag on having someone cook, clean, and do your laundry – and be your chauffeur – for the better part of a year?

            I read through the itinerary and smiled at the familiar memories from the ports of call at the start of the trip. They’re the ones I’ve seen in person, and I did love them. Miami – where we thought we might die from the bob-and-weave tactics of the driver who took us to our first cruise ship. (Perhaps love is a strong word for that one.) The Bahamas – where we accidentally found a private beach and spent a romantic afternoon splashing in the water and taking beautiful pictures. Aruba – where we took the “granny tour” to see the sights. Curacao – where we saw turtles swimming in blue ombre water.

            And from there, the itinerary shifted into places I’ve only read about: waterfalls in Argentina, the icy views of Antarctica, Machu Picchu in Peru, the islands of Hawaii, New Zealand and Australia, the Great Barrier Reef, The Philippines (where the kids I used to drive to school are from), The Great Wall of China, Japan (where an exchange student friend of mine from 30 years ago was from), India (where Phoebe’s people were born), the pyramids of Egypt, Israel, so many cities in Greece, Italy (reminding me of the many stories Lynne told me when we worked together), Croatia (where my former roommate, Angela, was a missionary for a year), Spain, Ireland, France, England, Denmark, Norway, Iceland, and even New York City.

            I can’t imagine how many scrapbooks it would take to chronicle the sights found in these beautiful places. (That might be another $82,000 expense.) But I can imagine that seeing the world by ship would be the only way I could do it without a panic attack. I can imagine that the sights are breathtaking, each in their own way. The God-made and man-made alike would be more than I could imagine seeing in front of my own eyes.

            When I think about the awe-inspiring worship that flooded me standing on the Gulf of Mexico last month, I can’t imagine that magnified over the whole earth in all its splendor and unique beauty!

Sunday Sentiments: Sabbath Living, Intentional Rest

 

Honoring the Sabbath isn’t new for me. I grew up in a home that had a strong focus on respecting the Lord’s Day. We never ate out on Sundays – or spent any money anywhere, for that matter. We didn’t go to stores, put gas in the car, or even take the Sunday paper. We didn’t watch TV or do any housework on Sundays. (I learned the hard way that homework was also off limits on Sundays. I never knew that was an actual rule until the Sunday when I found a forgotten assignment in my backpack and pulled it out to work on it.)

            The day was all about napping (which I did not appropriately appreciate as a child), attending church, spending time with church friends, reading, and simply resting.

            I don’t think I found the delight in the Sabbath back then. It felt to me more like a day of remembering all the things I couldn’t do, rather than appreciating the freedom of rest. (You can understand, I’m sure. How many of you crave Chick-Fil-A or want to start a Hobby Lobby project on Sunday more than any other day? The pull of what you can’t have is strong for all of us!)

            As an adult, I’ve tried to continue what I was brought up to do, but I’ve also tried to find the delight in the Sabbath.

            You could read articles for days (and I have!) on how we should observe the Sabbath, and most of them wildly – and emphatically – disagree on what is acceptable. If you’re hoping I have somehow found the accurate answer, I will disappoint you now and tell you that I haven’t.

            But I am learning, a piece at a time, to pursue what I believe shows honor to the Lord.

·         * No work. Scripture says we are supposed to work for six days and rest on the seventh. We don’t do house or yard work on Sunday. For the most part, we also don’t work vocationally on Sundays. I say “for the most part” because part of Ryan’s work involves speaking in church services, and those take place on Sundays.

·         * Resting, body and soul. We almost always take naps on Sunday afternoons, and I do so gladly and without guilt. We choose to spend part of the day watching TV, and I often scrapbook or play on Pinterest, because those things are restful to our minds and hearts. I know some people are adamant about unplugging from all technology on Sunday, and that’s completely fine! There may come a day when I feel convicted to do the same, but for now, I do choose to remain connected.

·        *  Church! We love our church. We love the teaching and our friends. Going to church is a joy and pleasure, and it’s something we choose to make a priority on Sundays.

One thing that can be challenging for us is handling the obligations that occasionally pop up from family or friends. Ryan’s family often has birthday parties on Sunday afternoons, and since we live a distance away, participation in those means traveling and carving out part of the afternoon that would normally be our rest and rejuvenation time for celebration instead. We struggle, because we want to participate in family life and support his siblings, but we also feel the pull to honor our need for rest.

Holidays, too, sometimes fall on Sundays, and that presents similar conundrums. We sometimes host and sometimes attend, but either way, the time allotted for rest on those days seems to lower significantly.

My hope is that I can hold legalism at bay and somehow remain true to the convictions of my heart. Unfortunately trying to strike a balance there is likely to offend someone along the way, so I just have to keep chipping away at finding that fine line of obedient grace.

I hold my heart open before the Lord to learn and grow as He chooses to lead and teach me, but I do want to say I’m grateful for the teaching of my upbringing, and I’m grateful for a husband who strives to honor the Sabbath too!

Saturday Suggestions

I have some (hopefully) fun finds for you this week that throw back to things I already wrote about throughout the week. Maybe you’ll find something inspirational tucked in the list!

ONE. 

Since everything is so expensive right now, keeping warm in the winter can be a challenge – especially for those of us facing an especially cold winter. This post shares some frugal ways to keep warm in the winter without turning up the heat in your house – and hopefully without spending a bunch of extra money! I will add to the list that I have my Comfy at the ready. (Those are giant warm sweatshirts that are a dream for keeping warm!)

TWO. 

My Dad has always loved hymn stories, and perhaps I have inherited from him the love of a good back-story. Earlier this week I wrote about the hymn on my heart this month: Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus. I had never heard the story behind this song, so I looked it up and found it here. The hymn was inspired by another piece of writing that the hymn-writer happened upon, so the bulk of the story is actually about the writer of that piece. I find it delightful that this beautiful song is a collaboration between two women who never knew each other! (NOTE: It took a while for the page to load the most recent time I looked at the article. So if it doesn't pop up right away, give it a minute!)

THREE. 

I wrote earlier this week about how we are “different-sizing” in our upcoming move. The space we’re entering is not smaller, but its layout makes it seem smaller in some ways. This article talks about how to downsize (or different-size) your own space, even if you aren’t moving!

FOUR. 

Half the fun of drinking hot chocolate is choosing the mug you’re going to drink from! I know everyone always has plenty of mugs, but if you do like a new one, can I recommend the MudLOVE collection? These beautiful pieces of pottery are made in Indiana! I own two MudLOVE mugs – and several pieces of their jewelry, too. They donate a portion of their proceeds to providing clean water in Africa, so every purchase is a win-win! (They also do fundraisers, so if you’re looking for a fresh take on fundraising, you can check that out.)

FIVE. 

I’ve told you before that if you want to keep a principle in your mind, you should keep it in front of your eyes, too! After working my way through the bulk of the Redemptive Compassion book this week, I found this piece of downloadable wall art. It’s perfect for a constant reminder that compassion is essential in our interactions with those around us. The words are straight from Scripture! (I told you I'm mostly done with the book, but my full review will be forthcoming!)

SIX. 

Yesterday I encouraged you to declutter from your home and life things like old bed linens and towels that you don’t use anymore. But before you throw them away, see if you can repurpose them in some way! This list gives you many suggestions on how to reuse old linens that have outlived their original life. Ryan and I usually move our old towels to the garage for him to use on messy projects car/construction projects. I’ve also seen animal shelters ask for old towels and blankets to use in dog kennels. Lots of ideas to get every last piece of life out of these items!

Have a great weekend, friends! I hope you find something good for your heart in this list!

Celebrating a Lighter Load: The Pursuit of Decluttering

 

I love decluttering, and January always seems the perfect time to do it. New starts are synonymous with organization – at least in my mind. I found a great site called Organise My House, and the writer has a list of 365 things to declutter from your home throughout the year. I picked a few from the start of the list to suggest to you today!

·         Old Keys. When I moved into my first grown-up home (which had been my grandparents’ home), I inherited a quart size plastic baggie full of old keys. I had no idea what any of them went to, but I was terrified to throw them away, because I feared the day would come when I found something locked, and the key to enter might have been in that baggie. After about five years in that house, I finally let go of the key baggie, and I am happy to report I was never permanently locked out of anything. Old keys are an easy catch-all. We move and forget to leave a spare key to the old house, but we keep it, in case anyone ever breaks in and figures out the key in the junk drawer goes to the place we lived four moves ago. If you have a pile of mystery keys, let them go. Just let them go.

·         Out of Date Food. We learned the value of this one when we worked at WillowBridge. We had a pantry in the community room area where we kept donated food and excess canned food from when tenants moved out and didn’t take their food with them. But we had to keep an eye on everything, because expiration dates crept up on us quickly! Cleaning out your cabinets or pantry makes a great winter project, since you can do it inside in the warmth! (And don’t forget to check the refrigerator and freezer. They can hold some relics.)

·         Old Bedding. Why is it that things like old bedding can so easily get shoved to the back of a closet and completely escape our vision? If you have old sheets and blankets that no longer fit the size bed you have, or they have holes in them, or you just don’t use them anymore because they don’t fit your color scheme, there’s no need to keep them around! When moved from Kokomo, I discovered that our (very tiny) linen closet was literally half-full of bedding. We most certainly did NOT need that much bedding.

·         Tattered Clothing. I’m embarrassed to say that I have some clothes that need to be removed from the closet because they’re just sad. Holes here and there (and not in the trendy way), a random stain from cooking mishaps, etc. A new year is a great time to go through closets and drawers and get rid of things that don’t fit or are no longer in good condition.

·         Tarnished Jewelry. A few years ago, I went through all my jewelry and pulled out necklaces, earrings, bracelets, and rings that had turned alternate colors. I also got rid of pieces I never wore – because they weren’t really my style or I didn’t wear the colors anymore. It was a good feeling to remove things that I no longer used. Why keep them? (Regarding tarnished pieces…maybe all your jewelry is made of quality metal that doesn’t tarnish, but if you’re like me, you probably have some tarnishing going on somewhere.)

·         Tattered Towels. I told you that I’m getting ready to update the towels and washcloths in our kitchen, but bath towels and washcloths need a good once-over sometimes, too. That was one of my favorite gifts at our wedding showers – new bath linens!

I am sure not everyone gets as excited about decluttering as I do, but I have a feeling that if you go through and get rid of things that have lost their quality or use. The lighter load feels so, so good.

Healthful Hot Cocoa

 

We keep our house on the cool side in all seasons. It’s warm enough to be safe and stay well, of course, but cool enough for our broken internal thermostats to be satisfied and not sweating. I would rather be a little chilly and throw on a blanket than be melting in my clothes.

Warm drinks are another of my favorite ways to stay warm in the chilly winter months. Most of the time that means coffee, which will not surprise any of you, I know. And as I shared with you a few days ago, I’m on a mission to learn to love hot tea, so I’ll carry on with that experiment as well.

But sometimes a cold Indiana day just calls for hot cocoa. Coffee and tea can’t possibly fill in for good, old-fashioned, hot cocoa. While I would dearly love to always recreate the hot chocolate bomb experience we enjoyed on our monthiversary earlier in January, that is neither practical nor possible. (I don’t have the skills or tools to make them, and they aren’t in our budget for regular consumption.)

I have hot cocoa mixes, but as with all things, I’m looking for ways to make this treat just a little bit more on the healthful side. So, I set out to find one that made me feel better about indulging while also still tasting like the drink I know and love. It’s a tall order to demand of a classic drink: Be somewhat good for me while still tasting indulgent.

For a while now, I’ve followed The Food Babe on Instagram, and I confess there are days when I have to keep her reports a bit at arm’s length, because otherwise I would have to stop eating almost everything served everywhere. But I really do try to learn from her teaching, and she is passionate about the harmful ingredients in almost every single packaged hot cocoa mix out there. They have tons of sugar, corn syrup, preservatives, and artificial flavorings, and none of that is good for any of us. I can appreciate that.

 I hunted around the internet and found this recipe for a homemade hot cocoa free of processed sugars and the other harmful things. I was skeptical! I’ll admit it. But I tried it one day and…I liked it!

I will offer a few of my thoughts and observations:

·         It’s not as quickly made as a package of hot cocoa mix. You do have to heat up the ingredients on the stove, and that takes a few minutes. But dare I say – it tastes a little better because of the effort put into it?

·         Almond milk (my milk of choice) is not something I would sit and drink by the glass like I would cow’s milk. But I’ve been ordering my lattes with almond milk for a couple of years now, and I’ve gotten to the place where I look forward to that nutty flavoring in the milk. It’s noticeable in this recipe too, but once you get used to it, I think it has a pleasing taste – and it keeps me satisfied for quite a while. I haven’t made this recipe with cow’s milk or oat milk, so I don’t know how the taste would change there. (Side note: we have moved to using almond milk exclusively because cow’s milk always spoils before we can finish a carton. I do all my cooking with almond milk.)

·         I use honey to sweeten my hot cocoa. You could use maple syrup (or a combination of honey and maple syrup) if you want, but the honey is sufficient for me.

·         I use real vanilla extract, and while I’m typically of the persuasion that you can’t use too much vanilla, I did try to add it conservatively in this recipe. I didn’t want it to overpower the chocolate flavor.

I don’t have hot cocoa every day, but I do enjoy a treat now and then, and in my opinion, this is a fantastic option! I truly love making my own from scratch – knowing it’s full of better-for-me ingredients, and tweaking/customizing it to fit my tastes perfectly.

Bekah's Bookshelf: My 2023 Reads (So Far)

 

Right at the end of 2022, I decided to try a reading challenge for this year. The one I chose is 52 books long, proving I often have loftier goals than I have time to reach.

            Even though I know I’m unlikely to have time to read 52 books in this particular year, I want to read as many as I can, and I thought I’d share my finds in case you need something to read also! (Quality also trumps quantity, so I'd rather read slowly and truly absorb than blow through the books so quickly and not get anything out of them.)

            My first book, which I finished in three days (and could have finished in one if I hadn’t been a responsible adult doing chores) fulfilled the category of winter read. It’s called Like a Winter Snow and is written by Lindsay Harrel, a new-to-me author.

            It’s a shorter novel that I found free on Kindle, so I downloaded it and decided to make it my first read of the year, because I figured it was a good way to ease into a big project!

            Like a Winter Snow is absolutely a Hallmark movie in book form. It has all the elements I love so much in my sweet TV movies – in a book! It was predictable in all the ways I needed it to be, it was sweet and picturesque, and it included the Lord, which gave it extra points for me.

            Even so, it held some delightful surprises! The main character, Joy, (which happens to be my middle name) is a 40-something woman (like me) whose parents were in their forties when she was born (like me). She’s uprooted her life to move near them and care for them (okay, so the similarities end), but her best friend is getting married just after Christmas in England, and Joy’s the maid of honor.

            The book contains all the cozy winter things…bookstores, lighthouses, tours of London, and a single gentleman who just happens to catch Joy’s eye. I won’t elaborate further on the storyline because I think you get the main idea, and I don’t want to ruin anything for you if you choose to read it.

            But what I do want to tell you about are a couple of quotes that spoke to me so powerfully. I know fiction is not usually a storehouse of great quotes, but this book was! I’ll share two of my favorites:

            The first one is in response to a declaration that a situation could not work, because the choices were either A or B, and neither one could ever happen. The character said, “There’s some other solution that neither of us can see right now because it’s not the future. Only God knows what will happen, and He can work anything out.”

            And this one: “Sometimes God wants us to be stretched. To choose the thing that’s frightening and unsure. To live boldly. To take a chance on the unknown.”

            Both of those came to me on a difficult day when a couple of situations in front of me felt insurmountable. And yet the words of fictional characters rang true for my life. There are not merely choices A and B when God is involved. There can be an infinite number of solutions I can’t even fathom, but if He wants me to see them, He’ll bring them when the time is right. Meanwhile, He calls me to live boldly, stretch myself, and take chances on things that might be frightening and unknown.

            If you’re looking for a sweet, cozy, quick winter read, this is a great choice. (Bonus! It’s the front end of a series, so if you fall in love with the little village of Port Willis, you can go back to visit in another book!)

            My second read of the year was quite the about-face in content, but I am really glad I chose to read it. It fulfilled the category A Book Everyone is Talking About. I chose to read Matthew Perry’s recently-released memoir, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing.

            I’m guessing a few of you might not know who Matthew Perry is, so I’ll explain and those of you who know can skip ahead to the next paragraph. Matthew Perry is an actor who is best known for his role as Chandler Bing on Friends. Chandler is quite a loved character on the show, but in real life, Matthew Perry has deep (deeper than I knew!) struggles with drug and alcohol addiction. I wanted to read his book to better understand him as a real person and to better understand exactly what deep addiction does to the person it ensnares.

            I’ll tell you straight from the start that the book is full of language I really did not appreciate, and if it had been any other book, I probably wouldn’t have kept reading. But I really wanted to push through and finish this story. Foul language aside, Matthew is a great writer, and I appreciated his raw (very, very raw) insights into how he thinks and operates.

            He writes candidly about how still, as a rich and famous actor in his fifties, he is afraid to his core of abandonment and being alone. He talks about how he tried to fill holes in his heart with drinking and drugs. He talks about how his body and mind seem to work differently than most people’s, giving him both a higher tolerance and need for massive quantities of drugs and alcohol. He writes about nearly dying when his colon exploded and the seven million dollars he has spent trying to get sober. Seven million.

            He writes about how his life has been riddled with poor choices that have left him alone and wading through the muck of addiction as a middle-aged man. He writes about how another relapse will surely kill him, because the amount of drugs and/or alcohol it would take for him to even get there would not be survivable.

            I told Ryan, when I was about halfway through the book, that reading Matthew’s story has made me exceedingly glad I chose never to take a drink. I believe in my soul that I have an addictive gene in my body, and I fear if I start, I will never stop. And I don’t have seven million dollars for rehab, so there’s that…

            Chandler is known for his quick wit, sarcasm, and one-liners, and all those things are true of Matthew Perry as well, but they are all his coping mechanisms to try to make and keep relationships even as he knows he will probably sabotage them before someone else does it first.

            When I worked at WillowBridge, I learned that it would be good for me to try to understand people who live differently than I do. I most certainly did that through the tenants we served. And through Matthew’s book, I’ve learned not just the behind-the-scenes story of the man who played a TV character I know, but the reality of an addict’s life and the cycle of his thoughts.

            Would I recommend the book? If you’re a Friends fan and/or like me, want to learn more about the struggles of addiction, this is a raw and informative insight into all of that. Matthew is a gifted writer, and aside from language, it’s very well done. But if you do choose to read, be prepared for a lot of extra words. (LOTTTTTTTT.) 

            I’m now working my way through the book I intended to start with for 2023, but it didn’t arrive in time. It’s called Redemptive Compassion and is written by a former Love INC director. It’s actually fascinating to read this on the heels of reading about ensnaring addiction. I’ll wait until I’ve finished it to tell you more about that. (I’m close!)

Dare to Different-Size

 

            When we told my mom we were planning to move, she wanted to hear all about the new place. We described it to her, and at the end of the story, she said, “It sounds to me like you’re going to have to downsize quite a bit.”

            If you know me, you know that downsizing doesn’t scare me, but the new place isn’t smaller than where we are now. (Or at least that’s what the paperwork says.) It is, however, quite different in its layout and use of space. It does sound smaller when you hear about it. And so I told her that we weren’t downsizing…but we were different-sizing.

            It isn’t a word, I know, but it fits here.

            We aren’t going into a smaller space, but we are going to have to be creative and particular about how we use what we have. Some things may not fit in the new layout. Some things may fit even better. I am confident that all things will be evaluated before we carry them inside, and only the things that truly fit our life in this house will be given a permanent place.

            You don’t have to move to different-size your home. I’ve often redecorated and reorganized merely by moving something from one room to another to see how it might look if it lived there instead. Finding a new home for something in your own home without spending a penny is one of the most satisfying things, I think.

            I’m looking forward to seeing how the layouts look in the reality of the spaces in comparison to how they’ve looked in my mind for the last several weeks. If history repeats itself, I imagine some of the spaces will look identical to my vision and others will prove to me that I am not a professional decorator for a reason – and I’ll go back to the designing board to different-size it again.

            If the cold winter days have you longing for change, newness, and warmth, try different-sizing something in your home. Swap something from one room to another. Bring new life to a new year without spending anything other than a little time on some creativity.