What's Up Tuesday

 

Know what I haven't done for a while? A What's-Up-On-The-Wrong-Day-Of-The-Week! They're always supposed to be What's-Up-Wednesday, but I almost never do them on Wednesdays. But since I worked an extra long day yesterday, my brain is fried and I'm going to do this for fun today!

1. What we're eating this week...

Welllllll, let's see. Sunday one of our tenants had a birthday, so we had a special lunch for him. Ryan grilled chicken and brats, and I made macaroni and cheese. We still have some of the chicken and brats left, so we've been enjoying leftovers! I also made spaghetti and meat sauce (homemade marinara in that) using regular spaghetti for Ryan and edamame spaghetti for myself. (I found it at Aldi and thought I would give it a try. It doesn't taste weird to me, and it doesn't make me feel overly stuffed, so I like that!) Also on the docket for this week: Ryan's chili and a pork loin with asparagus. 

2. What' I'm reminiscing about...

High school!! Last night, my high school buddy Pat spent forever on Marco Polo with Ryan and me and we were telling all kinds of stories from back in the day. Musicals and crushes and all kinds of stuff. It was a really fun walk down memory lane! (And of course we talked about Ryan's wrestling picture on the hall of fame wall at school!!

3. What I'm loving...

My pretty fall decor being back out to enjoy. I am especially enjoying the leaves on our little twinkly tree in the corner. I cannot believe how much those leaves change the look of the whole tree! And the real trees are juuuuuuuuuuuuuuust starting to turn here. So pretty!!

4. What we've been up to...

...working! We were off last Thursday and Friday, but we hit the ground running yet Friday night and have been going nonstop ever since. We've gotten a lot done, though! Meetings and documents and brainstorming and...a two hour round of Skip-Bo. I lost every game. Ryan won one, though!!

5. What I'm dreading...

Ryan being gone this weekend. I'm super excited for him. He gets to go to a men's retreat, and I know it will be great for him! But I miss him like CRAZY when we are apart (which is why we only do the apart thing every couple of years or so). I plan to sit with Phoebe, scrapbook, drink coffee, watch Hallmark movies, and probably cry. ;) 

6. What I'm working on...

All the WillowBridge stuff! We are revamping the way we do a few things, so I'm busy rewriting a bunch of content for that. I'm also brainstorming what I'll talk about at a fundraiser event next year, and at a church service where Ryan and I will be sharing about the work we do!

7. What I'm excited about...

Our annual pictures coming up next month! What are we going to wear? NO EARTHLY IDEA! I need to work on that one PRONTO. 

8. What I'm watching/reading...

Not much time for reading right now, other than my Bible and devo materials. Watching? Usually at lunch we watch episodes of Mad About You and at dinner we watch America Says. We're the coolest. 

9. What I'm listening to...

Phoebe snoring. That girl. She sounds like the train that runs through Grabill! It actually kind of cracks me up!

10. What I'm wearing...

It's that uncomfortable time when the clothes I need when I first wake up in the morning do not match what I need in the heat of the day. Long sleeves? Short? Pants? Skirt? WHAT DO I WEAR? So I do the thing I hate the most: change in the middle of the day. Ugh. 

11. What I'm doing this weekend...

You remember. Scrapbooking. Crying. Drinking coffee. Playing with Pheebs. Missing Ryan. ;)

12. What I'm looking forward to next month...

One more camping adventure! Our engagementversary. The aforementioned pictures. Hopefully some bonfires?

13. What else is new...

We actually do have something new in the works, but I don't think it's time to unveil it just yet. But I will absolutely say as soon as the time is right - and I'm super excited about it!

Lovin' the Hand-Me-Downs

Last Thursday, I went along with Ryan back to our old stomping grounds so we could see family and have a couple of appointments. I wanted to be comfy, yet look a little bit on the nicer side for the appointments. So...I pulled out this great shirt I purchased not long ago when Ryan and I went to the Goodwill. I realize Garfield is covering most of it, but you get the general idea.

When we stopped to see Ryan's family, his grandpa and uncle were painting a shed and in a weird twist that I'm not even entirely sure of in full detail, I ended up with dark brown paint right in the middle of the front of my shirt. I didn't even see it for a while. When we finally discovered it, Ryan's uncle was so sad about it! He apologized repeatedly, and I felt bad for him that he was so upset about it. 

Trying to make him feel better, I said, "It's really okay. I got this shirt at the Goodwill." He shook his head and said, "You may have gotten it at the Goodwill, but that is a really nice shirt, and I feel terrible that you got paint on it!" 

(Update: he used mineral spirits on it before I left, and I treated it and washed it when I got back home, and it's as good as new!)

I've not had that shirt too long and haven't worn it a ton yet, but I get great compliments on it every time I do!

And then yesterday I wore white pants (yes, after Labor Day) to church and to our tenant's birthday lunch. I would love to show you a picture of them, but alas, sweet little Isla (the daughter of our former co-workers) learned after lunch yesterday that she can't handle a combo of hot cheetos and ice cream. Had to change my clothes. 

Her mom was also mortified and bemoaned my beautiful white pants. I changed immediately, treated the pants, put them in the washer and texted her later to tell her everything was back to normal. She said, "They were such cute pants! I was so worried!"

My answer? "Got them at the Goodwill."

I love reading fashion blogs...not because I'm fashion conscious, but because I like finding ideas. Sometimes I click on links bloggers provide, but I always choke over the price tag of the clothing. I'm so cheap frugal!

But as I scoured through some bags of hand-me-down clothes given to me recently, I realized just how much of my wardrobe really has come from thrift stores, garage sales, or well-to-do shoppers who tire quickly of their clothing. I often find hardly-worn clothing for little (or no!) cost. 

Here are some of my favorites!

I love this pink shirt. It's got fun crosses in the back, little ties on the arms, and counts as a dress-up shirt for our work. I got it absolutely free from a hand-me-down bag!

Another of my favorite tops - and this one was a gift from Ryan! And if you're wondering about the location...photo scavenger hunt. ;) Anyway. I love how loose the top is and the little ruffle sleeves make me so happy!

Hey look what I found! The Goodwill white pants!! And the blush top? Free in a hand-me-down bag from my sister!

I get more compliments on this sweater than I can even tell you. (One day, a lady stopped me in Hobby Lobby to ask me where I got it, and when I told her it was a hand-me-down, she asked if I minded if she peeked at the tag! Ha!) It has a hood and is so comfy. And it was totally free. 

Super comfy thrift store find - with sparkles!! (Mine, not Ryan's.)

Throwing back to a lifetime ago in Kokomo - with a purple dress I got for absolutely free! It's the only long-sleeved dress I own - still to this day!

Yes, the thrift stores and hand-me-downs have been good to me. I am grateful. How about you? Do you like clothes that are easy on the budget??

Sunday Sentiments

We received a blessing in the mail this week. One of our friends sent us a gift card for coffee and the kindest note of encouragement. It came at a perfect time, reminding us that the Lord sees us and wants us to remember that people around us see us too.

After it arrived, Ryan said thoughtfully, "We need to do more things like this for others. It's always such an encouragement when it happens to us. We need to do more of it ourselves."

And while I don't disagree with him, the Lord laid on my heart the ways He has given us to help those in need in other ways.

* One of our friends is due with her second baby any day now, and a few weeks ago, it occurred to me that I wasn't sure if they had anyone close by to watch their two year old when labor arrives. I sent a text offering to watch her, and they said YES! Our friend went on to say that she had been worrying about who to ask, and she didn't want to bother us because she knows we are so busy. Well, yes we are, but the beauty of this job is that we can watch a baby while we work if we need to! Regardless of when she goes into labor - day or night, we're here, and we can easily and happily watch a little girl until family arrives in town! It meant so much to me that simply offering to be a stopping point for their daughter was offering a blessing they needed. 

* I spent yesterday working on a birthday party for one of our tenants, whose big day is today. As I baked the cake and spread the frosting over the top of it, and as Ryan went to the store to pick up all the food for the party, I thought about the beauty and responsibility of throwing birthday parties. I remember when I was a kid and my mom planned great parties for me and my friends. She always asked what food I wanted and made sure I had balloons and cake and presents. Even though I didn't know how to express it at that time in my life, I felt loved because I had family who acknowledged my birthday. And now, for a short season, we get to be those people for our tenants. No, we're not family. But we're the ones doing life with them, and we're the ones who get to try to remind them how valuable they are as we acknowledge their lives.

* One of my friends wasn't feeling well last week, so I checked on her a few times by text. To be honest with you, I felt like a pretty lousy friend. But out of the blue, she sent me a message saying what she needed most was a friend who cared, and I did that with my texts. I really felt like it wasn't nearly enough, but in her mind, it was exactly what she needed. Such a little thing...with a bigger impact than I knew.

I don't say any of these things to boast at all, but I say them to remind all of us that little things can mean more than you know. And in the moments when you feel like you're really not doing anything...you actually are.

The Saturday Six

 

One.

I clicked on this post (found it on Pinterest) because I wanted to see her fall decor, but what I ended up loving most was the gate she hung over the fireplace, which she then used to feature wreaths. So cute!! Ideas I'm filing away in case I ever have a fireplace...

Two.

I think this recipe looks really intriguing! I love anything that includes a sheet pan these days...makes cooking go so much faster! I confess to being a bit scared at first - I thought the pasta went on the sheet pan too. Didn't seem like that would make it very tender. Turns out you do boil it separately. ;) 

Three.

I was talking to a friend of mine this week about healthy lunches that aren't boring. They can be tough to find, whether you're trying to pack lunches for your kids or for yourself! (Or, like us, you might not be packing lunches at all, but you have to have quick options! I found this post particularly helpful! Lots of good ideas in there. (PS: any of you experts in making sourdough bread? It intrigues me.) 

Four.

This isn't the brand of oils I use, but I did enjoy learning a few more things about some of the essential oils mentioned, and I always love finding fall-themed recipes for my diffuser. There is something extra amazing about using our diffuser in the fall. I probably am more consistent with my usage then than any other season. Check it out! :) 

Five.

Hey Fixer Upper fans!! The Harp House is for sale! The price tag is a few (hundred) (thousand) dollars above our price range, but it sure was fun to see it again!!

Six.

Today marks 33 years since my little nephew was stillborn. You've read so much about him over the years, and his life still marks mine in such profound ways. It was the joy of my heart earlier this year to meet his namesake. (His nephew now bears his name!)

Two babies. One name. Thirty-three years apart. 

Over the years, I've also told you about different organizations that walk with grieving parents. I wanted to mention a few again. My biggest hope is that you never need to know this information. But if you do, I want you to have it!

* Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep: Volunteer photographers who provide families with photos of their sweet babies. This organization didn't exist 33 years ago, so our photos are a bit grainy. What a gift this group provides to people now! 

* Cuddle Cots: These are cooling pads that can be placed inside Moses baskets so parents can be given more time with their babies before they have to say that final physical goodbye. If you Google, you can find many foundations and organizations that collect for Cuddle Cots in memory of specific babies, but my link here is straight to their site. 

* Bridget's Cradles: I learned about this organization relatively recently. They provide hand-knit tiny cradles to hold babies born during the second trimester. This makes it easier for their grieving parents to hold them, even though they are so tiny and fragile. 

* Angel Gown Program: I haven't written about this one before (and again, there are multiple organizations that offer something similar to this) but I have heard about it and wanted to mention it! This organization makes burial gowns from bridal gowns donated by brides after their wedding day. If you have a dress you're no longer using, you can donate it for baby gowns. 

* No Footprint Too Small Bears: I also haven't featured this one before, but I have heard the concept presented. These bears are handmade to carry the same weight as the child lost. Their name and vitals are added as an additional memorial. 

I'm so glad that so many bereaved families have allowed their losses to share hope with others facing similar pain. I'm so glad this has grown so much since we said our goodbye 33 years ago!

Offering Framily

 

I remember all those years of my single days when people around me welcomed me in to be part of their family. It's not that I didn't have my own family, of course. I did, and I do, and they were/are good to me! But it was also a blessing to have other people that would allow me to be part of their days, celebrations, holidays, and more. 

I called them my framily. Friends who became so much like family that there didn't seem to be a line between the two anymore.

We feel like this work we do here is much like framily. Our tenants are not our family, but we do life with them as though they are. And we love it even more when we get to continue those framily ties after they move out. Not every one wants to keep us as part of their every day life, but those who do give our hearts a blessing!

Yesterday was a day off for us, and we were able to spend it with one of our framily members. It gives us joy to be able to share blessings with her like other shared with us back in the day!

We were even able to stop and see my parents as part of the day!

We were able to share meals with them, take them to the store for some essentials, and spend time just enjoying life together.

And on the way home, we introduced them to Ivanhoes!!!

It was a good, good day. (LONG! But good.) 

We were grateful to be able to share people we love with people we love. And Sean and Sarah blessed us by keeping Phoebe for the day so we could have a day out!

Sometimes all you have to do is offer part of your day and things and people you know and love. It doesn't have to be an all expenses paid trip. It doesn't have to be a lavish gift. It just has to be sharing who you are and what you love. That's what makes a framily.

I Promised Pictures!

Yesterday I told you about decorating for fall...but I didn't take any pictures. I thought I'd show you a few peeks at our fall decor today! 

This shelf is under our TV, and I just love it. This is the pumpkin I told you about that was gifted to me from one of the retreats where I spoke. 

The leaves we added to our tree behind our couch. So cozy!

I had a few little faux pieces left, so I added them to a corner of the kitchen!

Even though we eat at the kitchen island, I still love decorating our table! (Pretend I remembered to buy candles for the platforms...)

This is in our home office. Thanks, God, for the gorgeous day to accompany it!

A little touch for the guest room...

And another one, too!

Pumpkins for the coffee table:

And a welcome from our "back porch."

Can't call it complete without a wreath!

We love our cozy little bits of fall!

Hey There, Fall!

I had hoped to have some pictures for you today, but those will have to wait until tomorrow. I ran out of natural light today for decent pictures to take place.

Yesterday, while Sean and Sarah were there to cover the building for us, Ryan and I ducked out for a bit to get a little work done on our car. We decided to make a date of it, which was all well and good until the coffee shop closed way early in the day. (Guessing they ran out of staff. There was no sign saying they were closing early.) We wandered around for a bit and ended up back in the car shop playing word crush on Ryan's phone until the car was done.

But while we were out, I noticed the trees have started to turn already. It probably isn't early, but it feels early. The beans in the fields are morphing into yellow and the cornstalks are turning brown. The temps still scream summer, but the breezes, smells, and colors promise fall is lurking around the corner. 

I enjoy fall (as long as I don't think about the winter to follow) so I don't hate its arrival. 

And yesterday, I officially decorated our home for fall. I really haven't had time to seasonally decorate since Christmas, so there was something very soothing about pulling out tubs of things I haven't seen for a year and scattering them around our home. I shared with the building, too, and Sarah worked her magic in the Community Room and foyer to create a beautiful and welcoming display. 

So last night, while a storm blew through outside, I sat on the couch with Phoebe nuzzling next to me, watching the (granted, fake) fire flickering in our little stove. 

I glanced over at the little handmade pumpkin that was gifted to me a few years ago by some creative ladies at a retreat where I spoke. I think often and fondly of that group. They were the first group that ever experienced Ryan serving alongside me, and they made the weekend such a joy for both of us. They arranged for us to have our own private cottage so we could have a getaway of our own. They welcomed us warmly and shared meals with us throughout the weekend. (That place still wins the prize for hands-down best cinnamon roll I've ever had IN MY LIFE.) I remember the women so specifically and always enjoy unpacking that little pumpkin they gave me. 

I strung leaf garlands through our little lighted tree that sits in the corner behind the curve in the couch. I love adding the leaves to it. Makes it seem extra cozy and colorful in here.

I know we still have a while until Thanksgiving, but it's never an inappropriate time to be thankful, so I went ahead and scattered little gratitude signs around the house. I probably could use the reminders more than I want to admit. 

Oh! And we got some mums for outside the building, too. I can't wait until they are in full bloom. I think the yellow will really pop against the blue building. 

So yes, fall is here in full swing, at least in decor. 

Fall coffee drinks to follow - and maybe some pumpkin bread, too. 

Any of you excited about anything in particular this fall?

Pressing On

I've written before about how this work we do is much more about planting and watering seeds than ever seeing a harvest. I don't think that was something we grasped before we came here, but it was a lesson we learned pretty quickly. 

Let me be quick to say (for those of you who work in traditional/church ministry) that ministry itself is messy. It just is. I've worked for years in women's ministry and local church ministry, and I've seen some of those messes firsthand. I don't discount that truth at all. 

But I will also say that in the types of ministry I've worked in before, the people I worked with showed up because they wanted to. At least most of the time. They came to church or Bible study or retreats because they had (at minimum) a curiosity about the Lord and (at maximum) a deep hunger to know Him more. We could dive in to learning fairly quickly.

This work is different. Ministry rarely looks like Bible study around here. To clarify, it's not that we don't study or pray or talk about the Lord with our tenants. It's just that ministry looks more like working through issues of the past that still linger so profoundly. It looks like teaching daily life skills (sometimes over and over again) in hopes that sometime it will stick. It looks like trying to share wisdom and hoping it will be received. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it isn't. And the messes of this kind of ministry are completely different from what I had ever seen before. 

So we plant.

We water.

And we wait.

Not long ago, I had an impromptu chat with one of our tenants. We do regular apartment checks around here - mostly to make sure they are living in conditions that promote health and safety, not conditions that promote exterminators and interventions. This is also one of the ways we teach some basic life skills that many of us probably learned from observing our parents when we were younger. But not all our tenants had that chance. So I'd done an apartment check and took some time to offer words of praise to our tenant for her excellent work.

I told her I remembered when we first came, just over a year ago, and so many of the things on the checklist were a major struggle for her. We would go in to find kitchen cabinet doors (uppers!!) just hanging open with no one around. Her clean clothes would be wadded in a heap on the floor of her closet. Every light in the whole place would be on, even if no one was home.

But this time when I checked, the lights were off, the cabinets closed, the counters wiped down, the bed made, the clothes on hangers, and she even emptied the lint filter. I had a little happy-dance party right there by the dryer when I found that!

I told her how proud I was of how far she had come. I reminded her of the things I used to have to mention and how much nicer the place looks now. 

That same tenant was talking to me another day and said, "Is today your laundry day? Wait. No. It's tomorrow, isn't it?"

I didn't even remember I had talked to her about my laundry days, and I said so. She then recounted for me the entire conversation about how I wash clothes on Mondays, towels on Thursdays, and sheets on Saturdays.

And as she repeated my talk, the Lord nudged my heart that if she can remember what I say about closing cabinet doors and when I wash my towels, she probably also remembers the things I've taught her about the Lord and about faith...even if she doesn't verbalize it. 

This is why (and how) we press on when the discouraging days hit. We listen hard to the things our tenants say and remind ourselves that they're listening and paying attention even if it doesn't always seem that way.

It also reminds us that they are literally always listening and watching, so our words and actions matter. How many times has something stuck with me (for better or worse) that I merely observed from someone? I'm filling our tenants' days with my random moments of words, reactions, and decisions. I won't even pretend I've done it all right. I know I haven't. But I'm convicted to keep trying and keep being aware, because eyes are watching and ears are listening.

It may not look anything like any kind of ministry I've ever done before. But I'm pressing forward and trusting that words of life will stick alongside words of how to make a bed. 

Currently...

 Happy Monday, my friends! I hope this week is a good one for you! I thought I'd start off the week with some fun! Here's what we're up to...currently!

Beginning...to create some new ideas and processes for our work here in the building. We are always working to tweak and improve what we do and how we do it. We want to make some changes to the beginning parts of our tenants' time with us, so we had a huge brainstorming meeting the other day to think up new ideas. Now...we have to take ideas a step further and make them happen! The creative in me is extremely excited about this! :) 

Ending...our hunts for places to camp this season. We have only one more outing planned for this year (unless we do some "moochdocking" with friends or family) and can hardly believe this whole first season has come to an end. It went WAY too fast. We loved every second of it. But the good news is that with this first season under our belts, we know better what to look for next year! (The picture below is Ryan's handiwork and is one of my absolute favorites from this year.)

Loving...having Phoebe with us! She's staying for a few weeks, and our tenants are absolutely beside themselves with joy. They aren't allowed to have pets (for many reasons), so they think having a dog in the building is pretty much the next best thing. And we love having her here, too. She's been a blessing, for sure. And while I wouldn't go so far as to say Braeya also finds her a blessing, I will say that all four of us sleep in the same room every night and so far, that seems to work! That is significant progress!

Picking...out an itinerary for our anniversary getaway. I haven't started it yet (other than knowing where we are going) but I need to get busy on it! I've mostly been waiting for information to be released about what is available to see this year. The blessing of a December anniversary is that no matter where you go, you can find pretty Christmas lights. The hard part is waiting to find out where all of them are located! Apparently not all towns release their Christmas plans in the summer...ha!

Posting...here makes me happy. I just want to wrap up by thanking all of you for hanging out here, sending along words of encouragement and good ideas, and for being pretty amazing readers. I look forward to sharing with you each day and just want you to know I appreciate you!

Sunday Sentiments

 

Last night, Ryan and I sat down to watch one of the new documentaries released this year for 9/11. It told more stories of passengers aboard the four flights...and almost all of them were new to me. I sat, hanging onto every word of these life stories. 

Nicknames. Accomplishments. Quirks. Dreams. 

The people who died that day were made of the same things each of us are made of, and it is always an honor to me, each year, to sit with their stories and remember them for the people they were outside of 9/11. 

Earlier yesterday, I sat in some smashed grass, taking pictures with my right hand and video with my left hand of Ryan and one of our tenants participating in a pie eating contest. 

I can't say I've ever attended a pie eating contest before. I don't think Ryan had ever been in one before. But I documented the daylights out of it! And even as I sat on the grass, cheering on both Ryan and our tenant, it wasn't lost to me that we were making a memory in that moment. On the shelf of fat scrapbooks that tell our story, there will be a page with Ryan's face buried in a plate of blueberry pie.

It will be next to the page about our camping trip with Phoebe....her first camping trip ever.

And that will be next to the page about our 105th monthiversary and our coffee date to celebrate.

So it goes with our memories. These were the daily moments that were snuffed out for so many that day twenty years ago. 

That's why I never want to take for granted the opportunity we have to still fill our days with moments like these. And that's why I never want to stop remembering the people who did fill days with moments like these until it all ended so abruptly.

Hearing the stories yesterday also reminded me in fresh ways to live in such a way that I leave a legacy to others when I'm gone. 

Live fully, my friends. Enter the pie-eating contests and take pictures (even though they may not be the prettiest in the scrapbook). Make the memories. Live with intention and leave a legacy.

And let's honor the stories of those who have gone before us!