A Little More This or That!

I had so much fun doing a "This or That" post a couple of weeks ago, I decided to do another one today! Play along if you'd like!

1. Cappuccino or hot chocolate?

Well that should be fairly self-explanatory! I'll pick cappuccino, although I do enjoy a good quality hot chocolate. And during Mom's last surgery, I had my first frozen hot chocolate. Whoa. That nearly ruined me for life! Have you ever had one?

2. Nude lipstick or bright lipstick?

Well, usually it's no lipstick, because Ryan doesn't kiss me as much when I wear it! But I prefer more of a nude lipstick. Oddly enough, I currently only own bold lipsticks (which I wear when I speak so my mouth is easier to see for those who lip-read to hear better).

3. Hair up or hair down?

I wish I had more skills in wearing my hair up. I can do a pony and that's about it. So I usually wear my hair down. (This also helps take the focus off my nose!)

4. Pizza or pasta?

Pizza! And I haven't had it in over a month, so if you have a spare piece, bring it to a girl, would ya?

5. Shop in store or shop online?

There are some things I buy online, and honestly I'm surprised I don't do more of it because stores stress me out. But usually I shop in a store. I need to see and touch what I'm choosing.

6. Stripes or spots?

Stripes. Although I usually wear plain clothes, if I switch it up, it' to stripes. (I do like spots as in sprinkles on donuts, though!)

7. TV series or movies?

I enjoy both, but it's true that we are more likely to sit and watch part or all of a TV series vs. a movie. (At home. We enjoy going to a movie.)

8. Showers or baths?

We don't have a soaker tub, so showers for this girl! I can't properly relax in a regular tub. Now if we had this tub...

9. Nights out or nights in?

I dearly love both. We enjoy going out on dates and having a great time, but after so many nights of busyness, this girl needs a night in. And this girl needs a night in. ;)

Summer...Rest?

One of my friends shared a post on Facebook this week in which she said she felt like a bad mom because she didn't allow her son to play on the All Stars team this summer. She said the schedule called for practices three days a week and games Friday-Sunday every week. My friend said she just couldn't make their family schedule juggle enough to make it happen and she felt like she didn't measure up as a mom because of it.

Oh, my heart!

Ryan and I don't have kids, so of course we don't have valid opinions, but we have said before that if we did have kids, we wouldn't want to always have a thousand commitments. We like being home too much!

We may not have kids, but our schedule-for-two is about to wear us out this summer. We've been trying to apply the brakes so we have a little bit of down time, because I'm pretty sure part of the reason I wound up with a summer cold this week is from lack of rest

Rest is a good thing.

I remember my childhood summers, filled with sleeping in (and staying up late), swimming at the neighbor's pool, sitting on the back porch swing after dinner, watering the plants in the garden, blasting through the library's reading program, attending Vacation Bible School at church, and taking a family vacation together.

Those were grand days. Plenty to keep me busy, but not so much of a schedule that the whole family dropped in weariness at the end of the day.

Those are the days I want to enjoy even as an adult this summer. Evening walks with Ryan, visits to the ice cream stand, fireworks over the lake, grilling dinner, naps in the hammock, and evenings by the fire pit.

Please don't misunderstand. I'm not judging those who put their kids in summer sports with busy schedules. But it makes my heart sad when those who can't make it work or choose to opt out in favor of some rest feel guilty and worry that they've not measured up.

We all need rest. God knew that! He built in a whole day for it! But we're conditioned to be so busy making memories - even good ones! - that we fail to rest as much as we should, I fear.

Last night, after an evening of busyness, we went on a walk and in the slowness, look what we saw!

It's good to slow down and notice the deer.

It's good to come home and curl up with coffee and old Matlock episodes.

It's good to savor the summer and not feel guilty if you can't (or won't) do it all!

Soak up the summer rest, my friends.

Catching Candid

I'm not a photographer and don't pretend to be one. I don't know the first thing about all the rules photographers follow, nor have I ever grasped ISO and aperture and all those fancy words (and techniques). I'm just a girl with a fancier camera than I'm qualified to have and a heart to capture memories.

It can be hard to fall into the category I do, because upon occasion, people will ask me to take pictures for them, and when I flounder, they tell me I'm better than I give myself credit for, so I agree to the pictures. Then I spend way too much time stressing over whether or not they were pleased with the outcome and rarely forgive myself if they weren't pleased with something...anything...I did. I remind myself that I told them I wasn't a professional, but still I hold myself accountable for skills I don't even possess!

But I noticed something in the last two photo shoots I did. The posed pictures were nice, but the caught-on-the-fly pictures were their favorites.

I took pictures for a family with three tween/teen boys. Whew! Tween/teen boys aren't known for their love of family photo shoots. I'd spent a fair amount of time on Pinterest looking for appropriate family poses and we did have a good time putting together a photo shoot. But the family's favorite photos were the ones I took as they walked down a trail from one location to the next. I was in front of them, walking backwards, praying I wouldn't fall off the trail and break my camera, taking pictures as they walked and talked.

And at the end of the shoot, as a reward, the boys got to do some crazy pose (it had a name, but I don't remember what they called it) that they loved. Those pictures were truly them.

This week I took pictures of our niece (and her brothers made their way into several of the shots too). She's a natural and a poser, so she's fun. But again, some of the best shots came when the three of them played ring-around-the-rosey in the middle of the park, or when one of the brothers rolled down a grassy hill, or when another of the brothers wanted nothing to do with the impromptu group hug.

I love posed pictures. Don't get me wrong. I do dearly love them. But for me, catching real life is the best. Happy-accident sorts of pictures that don't follow every photographic rule but capture the heart of the people.

This is what I love the most. The memory-maker in me is so happy in those moments.

So I say all of this to say...give yourself permission for less than perfect sometimes. If you're more talented than I and can work all the bells and whistles that turn out award-winning pictures, then by all means, do that! But if you're not, don't think you're useless at pictures. Grab real life. It's worth capturing.

Father's Day!

First of all, Spill the Beans is running on a delayed schedule this week! We normally record it Sunday evening, and I was really really sick when I got home from the Father's Day bash, so I just flopped down on the couch and moaned. Ryan had choir practice last night, so we couldn't record it then either. We will get it, and my apologies for the delay!

Meanwhile, let's talk about Father's Day!

It was a hot one here in Indiana! Was it at your house, too? We went to Ryan's family's annual Father's Day bash, which they moved completely inside this year because of the oppressive heat. (It's really really not good for Ryan's mom's breathing!)

As usual, his family was kind enough to include my parents in the celebration, so I got to spend time with my dad too!

This party is a potluck, so we had fun while we waited for everyone to arrive!

 Dad dug into his Father's Day card/present. (Gift card to his favorite place to eat.)

Ryan was his usual servant self and got coffee for people. He even made his very own little serving tray. He was so handsome waiting tables. :)

We talked and ate...and did photo opps!

It was a great day, even though I was wiped when I got home! Hopefully I looked better than I felt! :)

PS - the picture of Ryan and me and the one of us with my parents are credited to my mother-in-law.

Surprise Parties and Date Nights!

Okay, first of all WHO gets a summer cold? RIDICULOUS!! And yet I did. Woke up with it Saturday and remain highly unamused by the whole thing.

Secondly, I wanted to tell you about our fun Friday night date!

So sixteen years ago, this darling thing was born:

As she stated this weekend, I've known her since breath one. It's true. I was taking pictures the moment she entered the world, and she became my bonus niece in that very moment. And now she's sixteen. SIXTEEN!!!!!!

We don't live all that close, so we rarely get to see each other, but 2018 has been good to us.

We both went to the same 40th birthday party in March:

And then she spent a day of her spring break with me:

And then there was my 40th...

And now she's gone and turned 16 on me.

Her parents threw a surprise party for her that doubled as a movie night! They had been waiting forever (five-ever, Savannah said) to see The Incredibles 2, and it showed at the drive in about an hour away from us, so we went over to surprise her and enjoy a date night!

Literally missed hitting a deer on the way - by about 2 feet. Hearts were back in rhythm about an hour later!

They had to open the gates early because the crowds were so huge.

We'd been told to look for a balloon on their van, so we found it...but that was a different van with a different party. Whoopsie! :)

Found the correct balloon, and it turned out the birthday girl was wandering around with friends. In the end, she found us before we saw her, but she was really excited and surprised!

We sang to her, and her mom had brought some birthday treats to share. So fun!

The movie didn't start until about 10, and we had made a little bed for ourselves in the back of our car:

We loved the movie! (We hadn't seen the first one and have been properly told how lame we are for it.) It was a good night, even though we got home super late. (No deer on the way home!)

The Shafferland Shuffle

First of all, a happy Father's Day to all the fathers, and especially these three who have shaped the two of us:

What a fun week we have had!! Busy, but fun! :)

* We had Phoebe most of last Sunday, and it was a super rainy day here, so we spent most of the afternoon piled on Mo napping. :) And then Ryan got out his new coffee roaster and began experimenting! He had so much fun. And the coffee tasted so good!

* Monday I got busy putting together the final touches for some reading tutoring I was about to start. My inner teacher nerd was out in full force, and I was so happy. I also did some reading of my own, which also made me happy. And I have returned to one of the workout routines I did a couple of years ago, and Monday was the first day. I'm still sore.

* Tuesday was the first day of "reading camp" which sounds so much more fun than tutoring! My little charge was a delight and it was so much fun to watch her eyes light up when she got something right! Ryan worked on our friends' house that evening, and when he came home, we ate a new-to-us salad from the Dashing Dish site: the Big Mac salad. It was so good!!

* Wednesday morning, I met one of our pastors for a meeting/coffee, and my latte was so fancy, I had to take a picture! :) It was every bit as delicious as it was pretty! I took my mobile office to church that night while Ryan had choir practice, and our friend Colby spied on me from the sound booth. LOL! Proof I was there!

* Thursday was a SUPER busy day. We had to get up at 4:30 in the morning so Ryan and his co-workers could catch a bus to Indianapolis for a work convention. While they were gone, I watched one of his co-worker's kids. We had fun playing inside and out all morning! And then that night we met up with our small group at Cross America, which I already told you about, but we had a fun time enjoying snacks, catching up with each other, and preparing crosses to mail.

* Ryan had a bit of a longer lunch on Friday, so we went out for food and took a walk around the neighborhood! And then we doubled a date night with a birthday party. My bonus niece, Savannah, just turned 16, and her parents organized a surprise party for her at the drive in theater. They were showing the Incredibles 2 (yeah, we haven't seen the first one yet). It was the perfect night to be outside, and despite knowing NOTHING about the movie, we had a lot of fun! And Savannah was surprised! :)

* Ryan had to work all day yesterday, and I worked on making desserts for the big Father's Day bash! When he got off work, we went to help his mom finish getting ready for the aforementioned bash. That included a trip to Sonic! YAY!!!!!

Yeah...we're tired. :)

The Saturday Six

One.

Just a quick PSA: Father's Day is tomorrow!!! If you forgot to buy a card, HURRY!!! If you forgot to buy a gift, this is a great (and quick!) DIY. It's supposed to be from kids, but I honestly think the sentiment of it can fit any age.

Two.

Do any of you do online grocery shopping? I've never tried it, but I have several friends (moms and single friends alike!) who use it and love it. If you've never tried it, check out this post to learn more. (Admittedly I'm not a huge Wal-Mart fan, but the process is likely similar to anywhere else.)

Three.

You know I'm a huge fan of Katie Farrell at Dashing Dish, and she wrote a post this week that I wanted to share. Katie's daughter turned a year old this week, and the post is about what it was like to transition back to her pre-pregnancy weight. While this isn't something I need to know personally, I know I have a lot of friends who wrestle with that, so if you're one of them, you might find some comfort and wisdom in the words. I am, however, someone who wrestles eternally with weight issues, so I found things I could relate to in the big picture, even though I've never had a baby. So if you have weight issues, take a read just in case you find something you can use!

Four.

I don't own these t-shirts, but I sure do love them!

Five.

A random fact about me: I have a weird fascination with A-Frame homes. Anyone else? Just me? Well, if you have one too (or if you want to understand weird Bekah a bit more) here's an article about the unique features of an A-Frame! Now, if you'll pardon me while I go hunt for some...

Six.

Source

SO excited that my friend Jody Hedlund has a new book out! Together Forever is the second book in the Orphan Train series, set back in the mid 1800's. I read the first book several months ago and couldn't wait for book two!

As I've told you before, Jody is extremely attentive to historical detail, so I always learn a lot when I read her novels, but it doesn't feel like learning, because it's all hidden in a story! The first book in this series (With You Always) focused on the events of America's economic crumblein the 1850s that led so may people to push westward in search of hope. Many children were sent westward by train too, to be adopted by families and hopefully have a chance at a better life than they could have had on the streets in New York.

This book continues that general setting, but the focus of this book is much more on the agents who traveled with the children to help them find new homes. What a heart-rending job! Marianne Neumann is the main character in this story, and we met her in the first book when her older sister, Elise, traveled west on a train in search of a better life. In the time that has passed since Elise moved away and got married, Marianne has gotten separated from their younger sister, Sophie, and she is desperate to find her.

Hoping that Sophie was sent west on an orphan train, Marianne takes a job with the Children's Aid Society as a placing agent. She hopes the job will give her access to records and travel opportunities that might lead her to be reunited with her younger sister.

Paired with agent Andrew Brady for the first trip west, Marianne has her hands full keeping track of over thirty children in need of new homes. The two find a rhythm of working, disciplining, comforting, and leading the children, and along the way, they find a bit of friendship for themselves. As Marianne wrestles with her growing attachment to the children, she also wrestles with a growing attachment to Andrew.

As they begin to place the children in homes throughout Illinois, they face a tragedy that threatens everything: their jobs, their friendship, and their future.

I loved the story of this book, but I also loved learning more about the people who worked as placing agents. Perhaps some did it just as a job, but I'm sure many were like Marianne: tender-hearted souls who ached for the little charges in their care.

I'm see there's a promise for book three for this series!! Loving it!