Heart Vows

I'm a dedicated blogger, and you can know that the mere fact that I'm on my honeymoon will NOT keep me away from y'all this week. I know you want to know about the wedding! But it seemed tacky to pause the wedding itself to blog for today, so I'm going to take today to share a sneek preview with you and then I'll do my very best to begin actual wedding coverage tomorrow. Hope that is okay with you!

Ryan and I did what I lovingly called "repeaty vows" - and I'll share those with you eventually. But we also wrote our own vows to one another. Kind of a little letter to the other. And by little, of course, I mean mine was a page and a half, single spaced. So for my first blog as a married woman, it seemed only appropriate to share with you the things I love most about Ryan and the promises I made to him - as I read to him during our wedding yesterday. Enjoy:

Sweetheart, do you remember the afternoon when I sat on the floor of my living room in front of you and read to you from the journal of verses I’ve been praying over you for many years – even though I didn’t know you were you? I read you this verse: Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17)

I already knew that day that you were my good and perfect gift – sent to me as redemption for the pain I’d lived through before. And with every word you’ve spoken and every action you’ve taken, God has confirmed to my heart that you are my gift. My redemption.

I love the way you pray for me – both in front of me and when we aren’t together. I love the way you have proven yourself to be a strong leader for me spiritually and how you guide us together before the Lord, not as my dictator, but as my loving leader. I love how you have unreservedly accepted me as I am and gently challenge me to be everything you see I can be – especially those things I cannot see in myself.

I’m amazed at how you trust me – after the pain you’ve lived through. And I’m amazed at how I trust you. Two wounded hearts can only trust like this after God has woven healing in them. We are proof of that. I love the way you understand me – even when I don’t understand myself. You know my heart in ways no one ever has. I love how you reassure me of your love through your words and through your actions. I love how you sense my needs and meet them before I even ask. I love the precious gift of your time you’ve given me, making me your priority and showing me now how I can trust you later with your time.

I love the fun we have together. I love our giant, obnoxious laughs and how we giggle until we cry and snort and then we laugh some more because that’s just funny. I love our jokes and the phrases that make us seek the other’s eyes, even across a room, to smile.

I love how you serve me. I love how you let me serve you. It’s never forced…it just is because it’s God-breathed.

I love how you comfort me when I’m afraid or sad. Even over the phone or through our notes and journals, you have a way of calming my heart and making me feel safe. I love how you guide me as we make decisions together and how we work through everything as a team.

I love how you compliment me and build me up when I feel I’m lacking. I love how you appreciate the things I do for you. I love how you appreciate the person I am. I love how you see a girl who felt invisible. Remember when you told me that? I see you. You do. I know it.

I love how you gently care for me and bless me and how you allow me to do the same to you because you see it is how I love you.

Ryan, you are my best friend. I am unguarded and unafraid in front of you. I joyfully take on a lifelong journey of learning at your side. I promise to make our home a safe place for your heart to dwell. I promise to value the man and love that you are. I promise to cherish you – this good and perfect gift God has sent to me. I promise to nourish you, encourage you, and love you. I promise to pray for you and with the help of the Lord, to be the helpmate you need to walk by your side from now until forever.

I’m honored you’ve chosen me to become your wife. I’m honored that our Abba would entrust me with your heart – this heart that I love so deeply.

Hear this promise from me today as I take it from Scripture:

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up. A time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak.

In each of those seasons, I pray we will cling to each other and build an altar that points to God to honor our love story.

Scripture says, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth.

And my love, I say…let’s do THAT.

(A photo from the day I bought my dress...just to give you a sneak peek of what is to come. Hope you love it!)